Trump Coup

Four More Coups

Welcome to the first day of the 2024 campaign season.

If Donald Trump really believes the last election was stolen and the election didn’t work, then why is he going through the trouble of going through another election? If I take my car through a carwash and it comes out with pigeon crap all over it, I’m not gonna go through that carwash again. The only reason for Trump to run for president again when he believes, as he stated last night, that our democracy is a “rigged and corrupt system,” is to use the 2024 election as a vehicle for another coup attempt.

Seizing power isn’t just one of the several reasons Trump announced his candidacy for the 2024 election last night. One of my readers on GoComics titled the Trump comeback attempt “Loserpalooza Grifting Tour 2024.” Trump has a history of grifting his supporters. To raise money from his gullible goons over the past two years, he’s used fighting to be reinstated (he was not reinstated), to fund campaigns for other Republicans (which he did very little of), and to fight the political attacks against him by the FBI and DOJ (they’re not political). Now, he gets to raise money as a political candidate, but let’s use last night as an example of how that works into another grift.

Trump made his announcement at Mar-a-Lago. This was a campaign event. I’m sure Mar-a-Lago charged the Trump campaign to host this event. For the slow kids, the money you gave Trump for his campaign or Super PAC went to the venue owned by Trump and then went into Trump’s pocket. This is what we refer to as a grift.

Records from Trump’s former accounting firm, Mazars USA, were released two days ago by the House Committee on Oversight and Reform. The disclosure shows that six nations spent over $750,000 at Trump’s Washington hotel during his presidency (sic). China, Malaysia, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, and the United Arab Emirates would spend $10,000 a night in order to influence the Trump White House (sic). Qatar spent more than $300,000 over three months ahead of a meeting between Trump and the country’s emir. So when Trump sat down to talk to that guy, he was probably aware that he had just given him over $300,000. These are just six of the nations that patronized a Trump property while he was in office. The Washington Post estimates that his trips to Mar-a-Lago alone cost taxpayers over $64 million.

At $64 million, that’s one dollar for every bedbug found at Trump Doral. Or at $130,000 to silence porn stars he raw dogged in Vegas hotel rooms, $64 million would pay off 493 Stormy Daniels. And MAGAt goons want an accounting of every dollar we spent on Ukraine, please.

Another reason Trump’s announcing this early is that he believes he can’t be indicted by the Department of Justice for the coup attempt, or the stealing of classified information, or by Georgia for election fraud, and for everything else he’s being investigated for. Since Donald Trump’s white nationalist terrorists defecated in the halls of Congress, I believe any sentence Trump receives should include picking up dog poop in Washington D.C.’s public parks. Hey, who’s that fat orange guy bagging dog doo-doo in Farragut Square?

And another reason he’s announcing this early is to scare off other potential Republican candidates, like Ron DeSantis. But if anything, Trump has potentially created an exciting moment for when DeSantis does announce, because it’ll be new and fresh after Trump has spent months being the only candidate barking out the same boring lies. Ooh, when he does announce, I hope DeSantis wears the white boots.

Boring? Did I mention boring? It couldn’t have been boring because last night, I turned on Fox News for a few minutes and saw Mike Huckabee and Jim Jordan telling Sean Hannity that it would be impossible to beat Trump because he was on a huge roll of dynamic energy or some shit like that. Sean, Huckabee, Jordan, and a few other goons were going on and on about how incredible Trump’s speech was that they weren’t actually paying any attention to. What?

Yeah, Fox News cut away from Trump’s speech to talk about his speech. The fear for Fox News was that their viewers might actually hear it…or fall asleep while hearing it. This is like me making a giant bowl of pasta with my amazing sauce, putting it across the room where you can see it, but not letting you have any of it. Instead, I’ll just describe it and tell you how amazing it is. Just take my word for it. The meatballs are amaze-balls. Mmm, mmm, mmm.

Last night, all the pundits were pointing out that Trump was attempting to duplicate what Grover Cleveland accomplished and be just the second former president to win the presidency. Grover Cleveland was elected to the presidency in 1885 and he lost his reelection attempt in 1889. Four years later, in 1892, he came back and won the presidency again. Not only did he win the presidency, but he beat William McKinley, the man who defeated him in 1889. Trump isn’t just trying to do what Cleveland did by winning back the presidency, but also by defeating the man who defeated him, President Joe Biden.

But after listening to his speech last night, or at least the parts I didn’t fall asleep to, Trump is more likely to duplicate the history of the five other former presidents who attempted to retake the White House than he is to duplicate Cleveland’s feat.

Trump’s speech was boring. Sure, he was reading off a teleprompter but it was like the guy couldn’t see the periods. It was one long run-on sentence of lies.

It wasn’t shocking that MSNBC didn’t air any of his speech live, but it was a little of a surprise that CNN gave up and went to analysts during his speech. But it was an even bigger surprise that Fox News stopped airing it live and instead, brought us the fawning analysis of Mike Huckabee. Fox News wanted their readers to trust that it was an exciting speech instead of viewing it and seeing it as the snore-fest it actually was. Jeb Bush tweeted that it was “low energy” and hashtagged #SleepyDonnie.

It was an extremely long speech. In fact, he might still be delivering it.

You might be thinking it only seemed boring on TV and to truly appreciate the dynamic energy and enthusiasm, one would have had to be there. We could always ask the people who were there if only the Trump Campaign would unlock the doors and let them out. That’s right. Several people tried to flee before they yawned themselves to death but were foiled in their escape attempts by locked doors. That was probably a violation of a lot of fire codes and definitely the stuff of my nightmares.

I was in a room during a Trump speech once and fortunately, the doors were not locked and my companion and I were able to flee the scene during all the seig heils when nobody would notice. But even if they had locked the doors, no Trump Campaign workers would have been able to prevent me from leaving.

It’s the lack of energy and enthusiasm coming from Trump that makes me believe he’s not going to duplicate Grover Cleveland, and instead follow the paths of Martin Van Buren, Millard Filmore, Ulysses S. Grant, Theodore Roosevelt, and Herbert Hoover (Yes, I have ninja research skills, y’all). Each of these five former presidents attempted a comeback to retake the White House after leaving it. What all five failed to do wasn’t just win back the White House, but win their parties’ nominations. Each of their parties said, “Nah, uh-uh, we’re good, thanks but no thanks,” and “seriously, Fillmore? What the fuck?”

Maybe instead of trying to be like Grover Cleveland, other than being tied with him for second-fattest president (Cleveland didn’t have a Dr. Ronnie Jackson to lie about his weight but he did have a doctor who’d give him secret jaw surgery on a yacht off the coast of Long Island), Trump should try to do what president John Tyler did.

John Tyler also lost the presidency after one term, took 16 years off, then attempted a political comeback by running for a seat in Congress…the Confederate Congress.

Sure, John Tyler was a traitor, a former U.S. president joining the enemy, but Trump’s a traitor too. Donald Trump is beholden to Russia and tried to overthrow our government. And we all know how much Trump loves Confederate statues and defends Nazis and people in white hoods, but the Confederacy isn’t around anymore. Maybe Trump can run for office in the government of one of our enemies that still exist, like Russia or North Korea. Tyler won a seat in the Confederacy and maybe Trump can sit in the Duma, the Russian Congress. They can call him the Duma Dumbass. It’s catchy.

Just be careful, Sleepy Donnie. Tyler won the election in his political comeback but died before he could assume his treasonous office. Don’t worry, Donald. I’ll let everyone know you’re not dead…and that you’re just giving another speech.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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One Trump, Two Trump, Coup Trump, Orange Trump

On January 7, 2021, the day after the white nationalist attack on Congress while Trump was watching it all unfold on TV for 187 minutes, Trump attempted to record a video condemning his followers for the attack.

In the original script, Trump was supposed to say things like “heinous,” the attackers would “pay,” and the election was over. Trump couldn’t even say the word “yesterday.” He even attempted to call the terrorists “patriots.”

The January 6 committee has now released even more footage of Trump struggling with his speech, which his daughter, Ivanka, was attempting to direct.

The original script included tough talk ordering the Justice Department to “ensure all lawbreakers are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law” and stating the rioters “do not represent me.” But all those words were crossed out in the script, in Sharpie, which Ivanka confirmed was done by Trump during her testimony.

In one of the videos, he pounds his tiny fist on the podium saying, “I don’t want to say the election is over.” The podium survived.

John McEntree, Trump’s Director of White House personnel testified that Trump didn’t want to release any statement criticizing the rioters and he asked Jared Kushner to “nudge” Trump along to make sure he eventually did it.

Former  White House aide Cassidy Hutchinson said the scramble to get Trump to speak on the 7th was partly because of a “large concern” within the White House that some of his cabinet officials might try to invoke the constitutional process of the 25th Amendment to remove him from office.

Of course, now Donald Trump is conducting hate rallies saying things like the terrorists are being treated “unfairly” and teasing pardons for all of them if he takes back the White House in 2024.

I wonder what the outtakes we haven’t seen are like:

Trump: I condemn this Heineken attack.
Ivanka: Not, “Heineken.” “Heinous.” “Heinous attack.”

Trump: I condemn this hyena attack.
Ivanka: No, not “hyena.” “Heinous.”

Trump: Damn Hee-Haw for this attack.
Ivanka. “Heinous!”

Trump: “Hoobastank.”
Ivanka: “Heinous!”

Trump: “Hemmohroid.”
Ivanka: “HEINOUS!!!!” For the love of god, Daddy, it’s “HEINOUS!”

Trump” Hemoglobin?
Ivanka: I swear, if Jared and I weren’t getting $2 billion from the Saudis after all this…

Music note: I listened to Queen while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Trump’s Secret Service

One thing that’s always baffled me is that Donald Trump receives special privileges that have been denied to others. For example, President Bill Clinton was forced to sit down and testify to Special Counsel Ken Starr, who was investigating if the president had received oral sex from a beret-wearing intern. Donald Trump only had to submit written answers to questions from Special Counsel Robert Mueller, who was investigating if Trump had colluded with Russia during his presidential campaign, which is obviously less serious than an Oval Office blowjob.

My inability to understand why Trump gets away with shit that others can’t is just a small part of my wider failure to understand why anyone goes full MAGA. Why do people join the cult? I don’t get it and I never will.

You think you know someone and believe they’re a rational person, and then one day after knowing them for decades, they start chanting “build the wall” and saying stupid shit like, “Let’s go, Brandon.”

The Secret Service is supposed to be nonpartisan. They protect the president, his family, and other officials no matter what party they’re a member of and no matter what their positions are on any subject. The Secret Service’s job is to protect, not serve as part of the administration. They don’t help with policy or politics. They don’t sell the president’s plans to the public. Yet, one Secret Service agent was allowed to take a leave of absence so he could join the Trump administration and then return to his former position in the Secret Service.

Anthony Ornato was the Deputy Assistant Director of the Secret Service and the agent in charge of Trump’s protective detail until he took a leave of absence to become Trump’s Deputy Chief of Staff. Like most things in the Trump administration, this was unprecedented. But just like the Emoluments Clause, this too was ignored.

Donald Trump was allowed to bilk the government. He was allowed to keep his private company. He was allowed to own a hotel on government property. He was allowed to charge the government rent on his properties. He was allowed to award medals during the Republican National Convention. He was allowed to hold the convention on the White House Lawn. He was allowed to shoot off fireworks at the Washington Monument at the end of the Republican National Convention. Maybe if previous presidents didn’t have ethics either, then they could have demanded and gotten away with devious shit too.

A Secret Service agent revealing he had gone full MAGA was like the time the White House physician claimed Donald Trump was in such perfect health that he could live to be 200 years old.

Ornato has served in the Secret Service since 1997 and had a very distinguished career…then he went full MAGA. He helped organize Trump’s upside-down Bible photo-op at St. John’s Church after the Black Lives Matter protesters were cleared out by the military using smoke bombs and tear gas.

Ornato also witnessed the exchange between Trump and his driver, Secret Service agent Mike Engel, who according to Cassidy Hutchinson’s testimony to the January 6 Committee, Trump had lunged at to force him to drive to the Capitol on January 6. Since we’re questioning the integrity of the Secret Service, it should be noted that Engel didn’t report the incident to his superiors for over 14 months.

The Secret Service protects the president, but this Secret Service appears to be protecting MAGA. Washington Post reporter Carol Leonnig characterized Engel and Ornato as “very, very close to President (sic) Trump.” During an interview with MSNBC promoting her book on the Secret Service, “Fuckers and the Evil Fucking Shit they Fuck with,” (I made that up) she said “some people accused them of at times being enablers and ‘yes men’ of the president — particularly Tony Ornato — and very much people who wanted to … see him pleased.” Leonnig said there was a large contingent of Trump’s Secret Service detail that wanted Biden to fail and some “took to their personal media accounts to cheer on the insurrection and the individuals riding up to the Capitol as patriots.”

Then, the Secret Service lost every text message between agents that were sent and received on January 6.

The Inspector General for the Department of Homeland Security, Joseph Cuffari, sent a letter to the House and Senate Homeland Security committees reporting the texts the messages from January 5 and 6, 2021 “were erased as part of a device-replacement program,” adding they were deleted after the inspector general had requested records of Secret Service electronic communications as part of a review of events leading up to the January 6 insurrection.

What we need is a Secret Service replacement program.

The Secret Service is outraged at the idea they’d purposely delete text messages and be a part of Donald Trump’s coverup. They issued a statement saying, “the insinuation that the Secret Service maliciously deleted text messages following a request is false.” And then they told the Inspector that none of the text being sought had been lost in the migration.”

Well, here’s the thing: If they’re lost, then how do you know none of them are what the Inspector General is seeking? Hmm? These are not the droids you’re looking for?

This doesn’t pass the smell test. In fact, when the migration of data was coming up, the Secret Service told its agents they could pick and choose which text messages needed to be saved. They told a bunch of corrupt Trumpers they could make the decision on which information to preserve from the day Donald Trump tried to overthrow the government. So naturally, it’s just a coincidence they happened to lose all the texts during a white nationalist MAGA insurrection.

Now, get this: James Murray, the Director of the Secret Service, is retiring and taking a job in the private sector. Where in the private sector is he going? He’s joining Snap Chat to become its Chief Security Officer. Do you know what the main feature of Snap Chat is? The messages are automatically deleted after a short time. Snap Chat is perfect for sending pics of your penis and planning insurrections.

Did Murray list the lost insurrection texts on the resume he supplied to the Snap fuckers? “Accomplishments: Oversaw program of deleting text that was evidence of a full-scale seditious attempt by white nationalist goons to destroy American democracy and install an unelected Cheeto-Potentate as a fascist mango dictator. Let’s go, Brandon.” You’re hired!

I assume Secret Service agents have to take an oath. There’s probably some mention in that oath about loyalty and serving their country. Maybe they just forgot about the oath or maybe they were lying when they took it. It’s disgusting to think of the Secret Service as a bunch of Steve Bannons.

Secret Service agents should respect our government and constitution. They should understand they are protecting the president more than they’re serving an individual human being, especially one as vile, corrupt, and flawed as Donald Trump. I don’t understand why people who’ve committed their lives to an agency serving their country abandon everything switch their loyalty to a racist cult.

The Secret Service is too secret. They need to answer questions about January 6. They need to answer questions about their own actions. If they want to be more Ronnie Jacksons, then leave your government positions. Serve America, not MAGA. This is another warning sign that our democracy is fragile. If the Secret Service helps engineer a coup, we could lose everything.

Secret Service agents should not be part of coups and coverups.

Music note: I listened to Foo Fighters’ “Wasting Light” album.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Coups And Condiments

You don’t really need a blog for this one since I wrote about it a few days ago. I just felt like having some fun. Plus, it’s Sunday. Let me have some time off.

Creative-wise, I wrote this last Thursday. I was going to draw it yesterday but thought I should do the Biden/Jason Vorhees cartoon first. This silly condiment cartoon should put all my readers back into their regular jolly smooshy feel-good moods toward me after screaming at me all day over the Biden one.

Personally, I’m against mixed marriages like this. Ketchup should stick to its own kind and keep its grubby ketchuppy paws off good condiments like mustard. There should also be a law against mustard and ketchup getting freaky on a hotdog.

Music note: I listened to Led Zeppelin.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Blotus

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

I had already used “Thems the breaks” before I drew this cartoon, but I just loved it too much. And if you don’t like it, well…thems the breaks.

Music note: I listened to something but I don’t remember what it was. Let’s say it was Nirvana.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Sleeping With Clarence

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

This one was a lot of fun to draw. I sent seven roughs to my editor last week which included this idea. I was going to draw this cartoon for my syndicate if CNN passed it by. I actually felt that way about at least three of the ideas in that batch of seven. I was happy this was selected because it’s the exact kind of weirdness and irreverence I want in my work.

And I got to throw in Easter eggs. I don’t tell people what or where the eggs are. I often hide stuff in my cartoons that is never found by anyone. I never hide something in a cartoon that I think is vulgar or to try to fool an editor. That wouldn’t be professional and I want everything I hide to be found. I want to get caught. What’s the point of hiding things if I don’t want them found?

Jessica, the designer for the newsletter, emailed me saying she was trying to read the sign in the fishbowl when she noticed the alarm clock and she thought that was hilarious. I’ve only heard from one other person who noticed the alarm clock.

I was asked by a lot of readers about the photo on the night table and the guy on the phone. But don’t ask me. You gotta figure it out. It’s my rule. I don’t hide Easter eggs to tell you where they are.

I think the Easter eggs have finally become my thing which is something I never planned. In fact, I never plan them. They just kinda evolve while the cartoon is being made which also makes me put more time into the cartoons. That’s kind of a pain.

Hiding stuff in the cartoons, adding Easter eggs or eye candy, means I create a special audience for my work. If you read this, you’re special. It means you’re almost as weird as I am. But sometimes I think it takes special people to get what I’m doing. Only weirdos want to come along with me for the ride.

Buckle up.

Music note: I listened to Men At Work while coloring this one.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Cash and Coups

During most of the time Republicans were screaming about Hunter Biden’s laptop without any substance to speak of, Jared Kushner was sitting on top of $2 billion received from the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia. Yes, that’s the same crown prince who ordered the execution of a Washington Post journalist. Also, while MAGAts were screaming about Hunter Biden, there was the existence of texts from Donald Trump Jr. to Trump chief-of-staff Mark Meadows about stealing the election before the election was called.

Republicans have been screaming about this laptop bullshit for over two years without providing any substance as to why it’s important. So far, the bulk of their argument is that since it exists, it means there was corruption from Hunter Biden which means there’s corruption from President Joe Biden. They also say there’s evidence of Hunter using drugs, which we already know, and that the laptop has images of Hunter having sex with minors, which is not true.

What is true is there’s an email from a business contact in Ukraine thanking Hunter for introducing him to Vice President Joe Biden at a dinner with a dozen other people in public. There’s another email, after the Obama presidency from a Chinese business contact, that mentions giving Joe Biden a cut, and there’s a third email from Hunter saying Joe Biden wants nothing to do with the deal, which never got off the ground. A lot of this is in code, but that’s all they have.

Photos have been posted that Republicans claim show Hunter smoking crack, but Hunter’s drug use and addictions are public knowledge. Hunter and his father have been open about this. Also, how do you know it’s crack he’s smoking? Photos of someone smoking crack or marijuana are just photos of someone smoking. They don’t fly in court. The claim that child pornography is on the laptop comes straight from InfoWars. Also, keep in mind that this laptop was in the possession of Rudy Giuliani.

One thing that is a fact is Hunter Biden was never a member of the White House staff in the Obama or Biden administrations or ever given the responsibility of international diplomacy. But Jared Kushner was.

Jared Kushner, along with his wife, was on the staff of the Trump White House (sic). In case you forgot, Jared is married to Ivanka, Donald Trump’s daughter. In case you’re a Republican, that makes Jared Donald Trump’s son-in-law.

Jared was put in charge of a lot of stuff, like immigration and denying states medical equipment during the COVID pandemic. He was also involved with foreign policy, outside the boundaries of the State Department which frustrated the entire department. Part of Jared’s job was to build a relationship with Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman of Saudi Arabia.

Jared and MBS, the Crown Prince, liked to communicate through WhatsApp, a phone app that’s encrypted and is an excellent way to talk in secret so your conversations are NOT archived, as required by the Presidential Records Act. Basically, it’s a great way to talk privately when you’re involved in some sketchy shady shit. Jared is a big fan of back-channel communications and asked the Russians to create a backchannel to talk to the Trump administration (sic).

The Crown Prince is not a nice guy. He ordered the murder of Jamal Khashoggi, a Saudi journalist under the protection of the United States and employed by The Washington Post. Khashoggi was murdered inside Saudi Arabia’s Turkish embassy where they dismembered him with a bone saw. Jared, who probably sees himself as a prince, is buddy-buddy with the Crown Prince, a ruthless person who orders murders. Jared helped broker $110 billion in weapon sales to Saudi Arabia over the next decade and defended the Kingdom from congressional criticism over its involvement in the Yemeni Civil War and the murder of Khashoggi.

During this time, Jared’s failing 5th Avenue property, 666, was bailed out by a Canadian asset company that signed a 99-year lease and paid a near-century’s worth of rent upfront. This saved Kushner from defaulting on a mortgage he couldn’t afford which would have brought all his debtors down on him. One of the owners of the Canadian asset company is the nation Qatar. The deal came through right after Jared helped negotiate the end of Saudi Arabia’s blockade of Qatar. I’m sure the timing was just a coincidence. Qatar even denied they knew it was going down even though it was widely reported and Jared’s company had sough investment from them before. But the Canadian company was a much better attempt at hiding their involvement.

Jared had financial involvement with multiple foreign nations before Trump became president (sic). That should have automatically disqualified him from working in the White House. It took over a year for him to receive a security clearance as he had to reapply three times as he kept omitting important business and relationship details on his applications. Remembering stuff is hard. Finally, Trump, as president (sic), ordered that Jared and Ivanka both be given security clearances despite what the background checks found.

Jared’s newly formed private equity firm, Affinity Partners, received $2 billion from a fund led by the Crown Prince six months after he left the White House. The Saudi fund’s advisory board objected to the investment. According to the minutes of the meeting, the board cited “the inexperience of the Affinity Fund management”; the possibility the kingdom would be responsible for “the bulk of the investment and risk”; due diligence on the fledgling firm’s operations that found them “unsatisfactory in all aspects”; a proposed asset management fee that “seems excessive”; and “public relations risks” from Jared’s prior role as a senior adviser to his daddy-in-law, President (sic) Donald Trump.

Basically, the advisory board cited that Jared had zero experience in this sort of business enterprise, is inept, is shady as fuck, and that eventually, the Saudi fund would end up eating its investment because it fucked up and got into business with a Trump.

Mohammad bin Salman ignored the advice and invested $2 billion anyway. This was back in July of 2021 and we just now finding out about it. The $2 billion probably isn’t all from MBS, as it’s a fund, but that amount is probably nothing to him anyway as reports put his net worth between $10-18 billion. He’ll be worth a lot more when he’s king.

This deal is not illegal. Jared had a right to do business with foreign nations after serving in a presidential administration. But, it sure does seem like a payoff of some sort for services already rendered. You would need testimony and documents to prove this was discussed while Jared was in the Trump administration and remember, he and MBS used WhatsApp.

There were tons of sketchy foreign deals with Javanka during the Trump presidency, like that time Ivanka was granted three trademarks in China the very same day she and daddy Dingdong had dinner with the Chinese president. What another coinkydink. And if photos had come out of Ivanka smoking crack during the dinner, Republicans would still be talking about Hunter Biden’s laptop.

Steve Baby FishMouth Mnuchin, Treasury Secretary for Trump, also received $1 billion from the Saudi fund.

Before the Trump administration (sic) was over, Donald Trump Jr was texting Mark Meadows about how his father could stay in power despite losing the election. Before there was a coup attempt, Jr was suggesting a coup attempt. In November 2020, before the election was called for President Biden but while it was still in the air, Jr texted Meadows on how they could overturn the results. They knew they were going to lose the election.

This included having Republican-controlled state Houses discard the electors legally won by Joe Biden, and putting forward “Trump electors” in their place. Referring to recounts and audits, he texted, “It’s very simple. We have multiple paths We control them all.”

He was also suggesting they at least create enough confusion that the election was never called or confirmed by Congress, then have the House vote for the president by state delegations. Even though the House was Democratic Party controlled, Republicans had the most state delegations.

Looking at how much money the Trumps were making off the presidency, it’s no wonder they tried to steal the 2020 election. The Trump presidency may be over but the Trump Crime Family is still in business. But hey, let’s keep talking about Hunter’s laptop.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Mar-a-Lago Confetti Shower

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When the House committee investigating the January 6 white nationalist terrorist attack on the Capitol won its legal case to gain access to documents from the Trump administration, it was discovered that a lot of those documents had been taped back together.

Presidential historian Lindsay Chervinsky told The Washington Post, “The only way that a president can really be held accountable long term is to preserve a record about who said what, who did what, what policies were encouraged or adopted, and that is such an important part of the long-term scope of accountability, beyond just elections and campaigns.” So naturally, with Trump being Trump, he doesn’t want to be held accountable for anything. What other reasons would someone have for destroying documents unless that person is concealing something?

When you are in government service and you start destroying documents, those documents immediately become evidence because you’re breaking the law. This nation doesn’t have dictators and a president can’t break any law he chooses…just a bunch of them, apparently.

Now, we have discovered something that I predicted way back in January 2021. Donald Trump stole shit from the White House. OK, it wasn’t a bold prediction.

The National Archives and Records Administration (NARA) retrieved 15 boxes of White House documents and other items that were being hidden at Mar-a-Lago. What are those other items? By law, these records should have been transferred to NARA from the White House at the end of the Trump administration in January 2021.

These documents include the “love letters” between Trump and Kim Jong Un as well as the letter President Barack Obama left for Trump in the Oval, encouraging him not to destroy the nation during his four years of trying to destroy the nation. But, despite these documents having Trump’s name on them, they don’t belong to Trump. They belong to the public and should be stored in the National Archives.

NARA had to have multiple discussions with Trump goons to receive these records which they should have had in the first place, and without having to talk to Trump goons. It’s like your negotiations to get your power drill back from your neighbor.

The goons are Mar-a-Lago also told NARA that they’re continuing to look for more documents. So, these 15 boxes aren’t the total collection of stolen archives. Again, what are the other missing items? How much of this stuff is evidence related to Trump’s attempt to overturn an election he lost? How much is related to the coup attempt by white nationalists? And how much of it’s just picture frames and light bulbs stolen from the White House?

The Mar-a-Lago goons deny “any nefarious intent” and said the 15 boxes contained “mementos, gifts, letters from world leaders and other correspondence.” You know, shit that doesn’t belong to Donald Trump. And I’m sure there was nothing “nefarious” about accidentally taking 15 boxes of shit that doesn’t belong to you. By the way, history tells us that any time Trump and his goons have told us something was innocent, it turned out to be the opposite. The only way Donald Trump should be out of prison and at Mar-a-Lago is with a court-ordered ankle bracelet.

The Trump White House had lawyers. They had legal people. They had staffers who were supposed to know the ins and outs of what is and isn’t legal. Someone should have detected this at least by the time box number eight was being placed on the truck headed for Trump’s compound of gangsters down in Florida.

As I said, I predicted Trump would steal stuff from the White House. I have a new prediction and that is: We’re going to find more. We’re not just going to find more stuff that was created during the Trump administration, but shit that was in the White House before he got there.

Donald Trump is a crook and a grifter. He grifted this nation for four years and he’s continuing to grift this nation. Donald Trump is still the man who had a sham university and a bogus charity. He’s the same guy who cheated contractors. He’s the same guy who cheated his own family from his father’s estate. All the money his political PACS raise is spent at “campaign” events on Trump property. This is the same guy who called Georgia’s Secretary of State and told him to find him more votes. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that Donald Trump stole from the White House. I’m sure Mar-a-Lago is stocked with White House toilet paper and tiny bottles of White House shampoo.

Can we just go ahead and put Donald Trump and all his goons in prison now? I hear prisons have shampoo.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Orders From The Top

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A couple days ago, a right-wing oafish cartooning colleague of mine tweeted that comparisons between Donald Trump sending his white nationalist terrorists to attack the Capitol in order to overturn a democratically-held election to install him as a fascist dictator and Charles Manson sending his followers to murder nine people, was wrong.

The people who don’t accept the comparison also don’t believe the attack was an insurrection and have a lot of trouble with the word “terrorists.” But the comparisons are valid.

First off, they’re both cults. If you don’t think the comparisons are valid, you’re probably in one of the cults. And if you’re in the Manson Family cult, then you’re probably really offended being compared to a bunch of MAGAts.

There is no evidence Charles Manson ever ordered the murders. There’s no evidence he ever told any of his followers to kill anyone. But he did send them out and they did commit murders, most notably, pregnant actress Sharon Tate.

Charles Manson was found guilty of first degree murder in seven of the killings. The prosecution argued his ideology constituted an overt act of conspiracy.

His ideology constituted an overt act of conspiracy. That is important to note.

Donald Trump’s ideology constituted an overt act of conspiracy which led to the attack on the United States Capitol complex. The people who share his ideology, which is a cult worship of Trump, are still denying it ever happened.

The people who followed Manson and who follow Trump are lunatics. They are cult members.

Donald Trump told his cult to be at the Capitol that day….to come to Washington. He tweeted it was going to be “wild.” His campaign spent $2.7 million to rally the terrorists. Donald Trump told them to march on the Capitol. They carried nooses and other assorted weapons. They brought zip ties. They chanted to hang Mike Pence. They called out for Nancy Pelosi, Adam Schiff, and Alexandria Ocasio Cortez. They barged in by overrunning the Capitol Police. Five people died.

Charles Manson was not with his followers when they committed the murders. Trump was not with his followers either, but he said he would be. Trump did get to watch it on TV. According to reports, it made him really happy. When asked to call off the terrorists, he refused for hours. Even when he did call them off, he told them that he loved them and they were “very special.” That is a cult. Your cult leader loves you and says you’re “very special.”

Manson told his family he loved them.

Manson was tried by a jury. Trump was tried by the Senate, which was full of his cult members. Manson’s jury didn’t seat any members of his cult. Why? Because that would have been insane and wouldn’t have been a real trial.

There needs to be a real trial for Donald Trump, and as far away from politics as possible. No Trump cultists should be allowed to sit on the jury.

Donald Trump’s ideology constituted an overt act of conspiracy. He needs to be tried for that.

By the way, another thing Trump and Manson have in common is they’re both white supremacists.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Trump’s Reichstag Moment

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General Mark Milley, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, was not the only person who believed Donald Trump would make a coup attempt. He’s also not the only person who believed Donald Trump and his supporters were acting like Nazis. People always say you shouldn’t compare anything to Nazis, but in this case, we’re comparing Nazis to Nazis.

First, let me extend a greeting to General Milley: Welcome to Antifa. We’re glad to have you.

Tonight, expect Tucker Carlson to attack General Milley…again. He’s going to attack General Milley for being worried that between the election, which Donald Trump lost, and the inauguration, Trump would attempt a coup. Tucker and other wingnuts will condemn Milley as though he has committed treason for recognizing Donald Trump’s inclination for treason. Most of all, expect Tucker and other Republicans to call the concern of Trump attempting a coup “fake news.” But the thing is, it actually happened.

General Milley, and so many more of us, were right to suspect Trump would commit a coup attempt…because Donald Trump committed a coup attempt. Also, it was pretty much a Russian coup that put him in power in 2016. So yeah, coup coup ka-choo, baby.

I recall before the 2016 election, hearing Republican fucknuts claim that President Obama would refuse to cease power or allow a peaceful transition and that he would become a dictator. I thought they were crazy. Then after Trump was elected…I thought the same thing about him. The different between me and those crazy guys is that I was right.

A book will be published next week detailing Milley’s concerns along with a lot of other juicy nuggets, like Liz Cheney slapping Jim Jordan’s hand away during the Capitol insurrection and telling him, “You fucking did this.” Republicans and generals say “fuck” a lot. The book also reports that Trump called German Chancellor, Angela Merkel, a “bitch,” and that he was raised by the “biggest kraut.”

The book is authored by Washington Post reporters Carol Leonnig and Philip Rucker and titled, “I Alone Can Fix This,” taken from Trump’s statement in his 2016 nomination acceptance speech and the kind of thing a fascist dictator wannabe would say. According to the book, Milley told aides the US was facing a “Reichstag moment” because Donald Trump was preaching “the gospel of the Führer.”

According to the book, after Trump lost the election, an old friend of Milley’s warned him Trump would attempt to “overturn the government” in a desperate bid to cling to power…unconstitutionally. Milley replied, “They may try, but they’re not going to fucking succeed. You can’t do this without the military. You can’t do this without the CIA and the FBI. We’re the guys with guns.”

The part about guns is going to make Trump supporters freak out and go out and buy more guns while issuing tough talk about how they’re ready to fight the government that stole the election and that will now come to their doors to inject them with coronavirus vaccine while taking away their guns and Bibles. Trump supporters claim they need guns to protect themselves from the government when what they want to do is use guns to attack the government.

Milley also referred to Trump’s supporters as Brownshirts, which is a perfect way to describe Trumpian Brownshirts. Milley believed long before the insurrection, like many of us, that “Trump was stoking unrest, possibly in hopes of an excuse to invoke the Insurrection Act and call out the military.” There are reports Trump attempted to do this June 1, 2020, the day he had the military use tear gas to clear Black Lives Matter protesters from Lafayette Square so he could conduct a photo-op outside St. John’s Church with an upside-down Bible.

The “Reichstag moment” is in reference to a fire in the German parliament, which the Nazis used to consolidate their authoritarian rule in 1933. It’s widely believed the culprits who set the fire were the Nazis. Setting fires to get credit for putting them out was a Trump tactic. It’s easy to believe he’d set a fire to consolidate his power and become a America’s first fuhrer.

When Trump’s white nationalist terrorists attacked the Capitol on January 6, General Milley referred to them as Nazis and said they were Boogaloo Boys and Proud Boys. He’s right. He told aides, “These are the same people we fought in the second world war.”

Milley was concerned personnel moves that put Trump goons in positions of power at the Pentagon after the November 2020 election, including the firing of Defense Secretary Mark Esper and the resignation of Attorney General William Barr, were the sign of something sinister to come. And why wouldn’t he believe that when the entire four years of the Trump presidency (sic) were sinister.

Before the coup attempt, Milley told aides, “We’re going to put a ring of steel around this city and the Nazis aren’t getting in.” Except the Nazis got in. The Nazis entered Washington in January, 2017, and while a lot of them are in the Fuhrer Bunker known as Mar-a-Lago, a lot more are still in Washington.

Milley was relieved they got Trump out of town without a successful coup, and our new president inaugurated and that “we landed the ship safely,” but we haven’t cleared our nations of Nazis. Also, you don’t land ships. You land planes. You dock ships. General Milley is not an admiral or in the Air Force.

Every week, we get reports of white nationalist terror groups planning another insurrection attempt. The head Nazi himself has endorsed the pillow Nazi’s belief that Trump will return to power in August. There are still a bunch of Nazis, many at a convention in Dallas last week, who believe Trump won the election and will return to power without an election. There are still Trump Brownshirts in Congress protecting Nazis and refusing an investigation into Nazis.

And tonight on Fox News, there will be a Nazi and Brownshirt boy telling us the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs is committing treason for calling out Nazis.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw: