Rent

Some Garzonging Advice


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There are roughly 800,000 federal employees affected by Donald Trump’s government shutdown and will have to wait to receive back pay if any at all. Since Trump’s shutdown is expected to last into the new year (in case you’re a Republican, that’s beyond the first of the month), many are wondering how they’re going to make rent and pay other bills. Fortunately for them, the Office of Personnel Management has tweeted some advice. Barter.

That’s right. Barter. Tell your landlord that you have been furloughed due to Donald Trump shutting down the government over a racist vanity project and that you’re willing to do some chores to reduce your rent. I’m sure your landlord will be understanding, especially if he’s a Mexican-hating wall enthusiast, and will promptly find some toilets for you to unclog.

The OPM says it can’t offer legal advice on this matter, so those furloughed should consult with an attorney. How are they supposed to pay an attorney if they can’t pay rent? Of course, a lot of federal workers are restricted from taking outside work and would have to discuss the matter with their supervisor, who has probably also been furloughed. If it’s your job to answer the phone at your agency then there’s probably nobody there to answer when you call it yourself.

The bartering advice is so bad; it makes you think some idiot appointed the head of the OPM. Who appoints the directors of federal agencies? Oh, yeah. Donald Trump, who claims federal employees are fine with the shutdown because they want the border wall, and most who aren’t being paid are Democrats.

What a boob.

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