Eat Your Conspiracy


Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen testified before the Democrat-controlled House Homeland Security Committee yesterday and insisted that the cages Customs and Border Protection (CBP) used to detain migrant and asylum-seeking kids aren’t really cages.

She told Committee Chair Bennie Thompson, “Sir, they are not cages, they are areas of the border facility that are carved out for the safety and protection of those who remain there while they’re being processed.”

Democrat Bonnie Watson Coleman asked Nielsen, “Does it differ from the cages you put your dogs in when you let them stay outside?” Nielsen answered, “Yes … it’s larger, it has facilities, it provides room to sit, to stand, to lay down…” Coleman interjected, “So does my dog’s cage.”

Nielsen kept arguing throughout the hearing that children who have been separated and lost under Trump’s dehumanizing immigration policies are not kept in cages…if we don’t call them cages.

Last year, more than 2,700 children were separated from their parents and detained by CBP with many parents deported without their children. Democrats and liberals are outraged. Trump supporters are also outraged over issues involving children, but not over any issues that actually exist. Like Trump’s call for a border wall, they’re crying about crises where there aren’t any.

If you watched any of the Conservative Political Action Conference, you would have heard the wingnuts scream about “infanticide” and the “culture of death,” which are their new talking points.

Speaking to CPAC, Mike Pence said, “With Democrats standing for late-term abortion and infanticide and a culture of death, I promise you this president, this party and this movement will always stand for the unborn.” You have probably seen similar rants on your tinfoil hat-wearing uncle’s Facebook page.

Senate Republicans failed to advance a bill last week called the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act. Basically, if it had become law, it would have forced doctors to “preserve the life and health” of a child born alive after an abortion attempt, regardless of the wishes of the parents.

Dr. Daniel Grossman, a professor of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive sciences at the University of California, San Francisco, told The New York Times that an infant being born alive after an attempted abortion is extremely rare. Dr. Kristyn Brandi, a board member of Physicians for Reproductive Health, told Vox that she’d never even heard of such a case. She said, “This is a part of the false narrative around this bill and abortion later in pregnancy.”

One of the ways this can occur is if a condition threatens the life of both the mother and the fetus, and labor must be induced in order to save the mother’s life. It’s unlikely the infant would survive, but this bill would have forced a doctor to attempt to revive the child or face up to five years in prison.

Immigrant children separated from their families, kept in cages, and lost in the system, Republicans don’t worry about that so much. Extremely rare cases of a child being born alive after an abortion attempt to save the mother’s life? Republicans are outraged. While they scream “infanticide,” nobody is killing the baby who was born alive. That’s just as big of a lie as claiming Democrats are eating babies.

According to a new book on Amazon’s best-seller list, Democrats are eating babies. Democrats, dingos, what’s the difference?

QAnon is this thing that started on the extreme fringes of the dark web in places like 4chan, and quickly spread to Youtube, Reddit, Twitter, and Facebook.

QAnon is a far-right conspiracy alleging a plot against Trump by the “deep state.” Q, who may be or several individuals, claims to be on the inside of the government and thousands of people believe this. Some of those people are Roseanne Barr, Alex Jones, and Jerome Corsi. Sean Hannity has even shared QAnon-related material on his Twitter account.

The book QAnon: An Invitation to the Great Awakening was supposedly written by 12 anonymous members of the group promoting the theory, and presents their ideas in what one customer review calls “a gentle way for uninformed ‘normies’ to find out what is really going on within the political class that have been ruling over us for decades.”

What are some of their ideas? The “deep state” involves President Obama and Hillary Clinton. Trump and Robert Mueller are actually working together and the Russiagate investigation is actually a ruse. Hillary Clinton is the leader of a Satanic cabal that feeds on the blood of children and profits off sex trafficking. And, Democrats eat babies. Yum. Those theories are almost as unbelievable as believing that Trump supporters read books.

It’s very easy to laugh at these people, and a lot of fun I might add. But, it’s dangerous to ignore them. One Q follower was arrested on terrorism charges after he drove an armored vehicle containing an AR-15, and blocking traffic on the Hoover Dam for 90 minutes. He was on a mission from Q to demand the Justice Department release the OIG report on the conduct of FBI agents during the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s server. The thing is, the OIG report had been released the day before, but he was demanding that they release the “real” one.

Members of the Q community have posted photos of Michael Avenatti’s office. Later, someone shared the picture of an as-of-yet unidentified man, appearing to be holding a cellphone in one hand, and a long, thin object in the other, standing in the street near the office, adding that a message “had been sent.” For what it’s worth, one of these nitwits posted a photo of what he/she thought was my house on a Facebook post. Shitweasels find that kind of stuff amusing.

In 2016, 4chan users spread a theory that Hillary Clinton was operating a child sex ring from the basement of Comet Ping Pong pizza parlor in Washington, DC. In December of that year, a North Carolina fucknut drove to the pizza parlor and fired three shots into Comet Ping Pong, fortunately without injuring anyone. He didn’t find any child sex slaves. He didn’t even find a basement. Do you know what was inside Comet Ping Pong’s pizza parlor? Pizza.

In 2015, a shooter went to an abortion clinic in Colorado Springs and killed three people because he believed the now debunked far-right videos that Planned Parenthood was selling dead-baby-body parts. And that conspiracy theory isn’t even on the fringe as several presidential candidates promoted the lie.

These people don’t care about children. They scream about abortion but they don’t care about a child after it’s alive. They sure don’t care about housing or feeding them. They definitely don’t care if Donald Trump throws them into cages. They would rather freak out about imagined issues than real ones because you don’t have to solve the fake ones. Plus, if it’s bullshit then you don’t have to know what you’re talking about.

These 4chan and QAnon people are unstable which seems to be a trait among Trump supporters…and Trump.

Trump is hate and he has a more than willing base that eats it up. For the rest of us, we have to live in a dangerous climate they’ve created.

Planned Parenthood is not selling the body parts of dead babies. Comet Ping Pong is not the base of a child-sex ring operated by Hillary Clinton. Democrats are not eating babies. Donald Trump is keeping children in cages. Which one are you more concerned with?

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
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A Star Is Scorned


Donald Trump is a horrible person who nobody likes except racists and people OK with racists.

As a reminder that Donald Trump was a celebrity contributing nothing meaningful to society before he was a politician contributing nothing meaningful to society, he has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

A testament to the public’s animosity toward Trump has been expressed on his star (which he paid $30,000 to have installed, which probably came from the Trump Foundation). Some people kick and spit on it, dogs have been allowed to relieve themselves on it, stickers have been placed on it, someone built a tiny wall around it, and it’s been spray painted, once with a Swastika (though to be fair, that may have been a supporter). Most recently, a man, described by a witness as “going to town on it,” destroyed it with a pickax. That individual has been charged, released on a $20,000 bail, and faces up to three years in prison. With charges like that you’d think he was a member of the Trump Campaign.

The city of West Hollywood decided that having a star for Trump was a bad idea and voted unanimously in a non-binding resolution to have it removed. It’s non-binding because they don’t have jurisdiction over the star. That belongs to the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce.

The Chamber released a statement that they have no plans to remove Trump’s star and that once a star is added it’s considered a part of the “historic fabric of the Hollywood Walk of Fame.” I suggest some people walk their dogs by the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce and show them how they feel about this.

Mark Hamill has a great idea. He suggests replacing the president with a princess. Princess Leia that is, as Carrie Fisher doesn’t have a star on the Walk of Fame. What? How can this be? This can’t be allowed to continue. She should have had a star light years ago, and having hers replace Trump’s would be galactic justice.

As her friend and writer Paul Slansky said, she would have loved being the face of The Resistance.

Your support in the form of donations is appreciated. I am fully independent as I’m not employed by a newspaper or with a major syndicate (leaving one to be independent). It does take a lot of work to provide you with cartoons, columns, and videos almost every day (more than any other political cartoonist), and I don’t charge my clients much at all. If you can, please consider making a financial contribution to keep the fun flowing, or purchase a signed print for $40. Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!!

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Media Accosted


Donald Trump took his traveling freak show to Tampa Tuesday night and it was a coming out party for the worst of us.

He continued his war against the media, where he’s labeled them in the past as scum, dishonest, terrible people, bad actors, liars, fake news, and even the enemy of the American people. During the presidential campaign, he would single out MSNBC’s Katy Tur at rallies to the point she would need security to get out of the building without being harmed. In case you haven’t noticed yet, Donald Trump is a bully.

Another one of his favorite targets is Jim Acosta from CNN. On Tuesday, Acosta captured footage of Trump’s supporters screaming and cursing while flipping him off. Where do these people come from? They come from 4chan (and 8chan, which I just found existed. What the Hell is 8chan? A place for those who find 4chan a little too tolerant?).

4chan is a forum where right-wingers, racists, and conspiracy theorists can gather online and combine all their horrible traits into a wonderful and colorful cornucopia of duh. They call this group QAnon.

What is QAnon? They’re following someone named “Q,” who probably doesn’t exist or is a persona of multiple people, who claims to possess a top-level security clearance and evidence of a worldwide criminal conspiracy. It’s another deep-state conspiracy. In this one, Robert Mueller isn’t really investigating Trump. He’s targeting Hillary Clinton, President Obama and other members of the “deep state” like John Podesta and John McCain. The theories for why they’re being investigated range from being the real colluders with Vladimir Putin to being involved in a global pedophile ring that includes members of Hollywood’s A-list, like Tom Hanks.

Don’t look at me like that. I didn’t make this shit up.

Furthermore, they believe many of these individuals are wearing ankle bracelets for Mueller to track them and bring them into custody after Trump gives the order.

Maybe the “Q” comes from NyQuil, and they get their beliefs after downing several bottles of the stuff.

We can laugh at these people. We can find it highly amusing, and we do, because, “Ha-ha! They’re stupid!” But, we need to recognize the real danger in this Q thing.

It wasn’t that long ago that a conspiracy theorists, who got his information from some of the same sites as the Q-balls, went on a shooting spree at a Washington, D.C. pizza shop because he believed Hillary Clinton was operating a child-sex-slave ring out of the basement. The place doesn’t even have a basement, but I hear the pizza’s not bad. Unfortunately, most conspiracy theorists prefer Papa John’s.

In late July, a shooter killed five people at a Maryland newspaper. Trump paused for a few hours before he continued attacking the press because he’s classy like that.

This is dangerous because these people follow Donald Trump. Trump engages in conspiracy theories, and he loves to feed red meat to his base. In Tampa, QAnon signs were spotted as well as people waving some with “We Are Q,” and others wearing shirts with giant Q’s. I was most impressed so many Trump supporters didn’t misspell “Q.”

Wednesday, White House Spokesgoon Sarah Huckabee Sanders shared a conspiracy theory from the official WH podium to the media. If she is a member of the order, she’s not the only famous person. Roseanne Barr and Curt Schilling are members and have tweeted support and posted videos for the group on Facebook.

Trump tells his followers that they shouldn’t listen to the media and not to believe what they see and hear. That they should only listen to him. They’re listening. He’s also riling them up.

Jim Acosta described being at Tampa’s rally as “it felt like we weren’t in America anymore.” That didn’t even look 2018 to me. It more resembled Munich in 1923.

Sean Hannity piled on and lectured Acosta on how to do journalism which must be like getting a cooking lesson from Jeffrey Dahmer. Hannity said, “I’m actually going to give your network some advice, if you have an open mind and an open heart. The people of this country are screaming at you for a reason. They don’t like your unfair, abusively biased treatment of the president of the United States.”

No, Sean. They’re screaming at him because he is doing his job. If conspiracy theorists don’t like a journalist, then good on that journalist. But, why should any journalists listen to Hannity? Hannity doesn’t listen to them. He only listens to Trump.

Hannity is a conspiracy theorist and Fox News pays him around $20 million a year to go on their network at their most valuable hour to peddle bunk, not news. Do you remember the Seth Rich story? Hannity peddled that one until the brass at Fox told him to stop. He never corrected himself or apologized. What kind of news network puts on a conspiracy theorist taking his orders from Donald Trump? Fox News, that’s who.

Instead of defending journalists, facts, and information, Hannity stood up for the conspiracy crowd. What’s worrisome, since he has a direct line to him, is when the president will start publicly peddling these theories. Run, Forrest! Run!

Trump promises he’s going to make America great again. His supporters believe this while shouting and cursing at the press. They believe they’re the ones who will make America great again while they’re flipping a journalist off for doing his job and while signing autographs and taking pictures with children.

Being a troglodyte is not how you make America great. Neither is being a willfully uninformed, stupid, conspiracy-theory believing sycophant who can’t think for himself.

If this QAnon-Hooterville consortium of knuckle-dragging Neanderthals is making America great again, I’m not seeing it.

Your support in the form of donations is appreciated. I am fully independent as I’m not employed by a newspaper or with a major syndicate (leaving one to be independent). It does take a lot of work to provide you with cartoons, columns, and videos almost every day (more than any other political cartoonist), and I don’t charge my clients much at all. If you can, please consider making a financial contribution to keep the fun flowing, or purchase a signed print for $40. Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!!

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