Nikki Haley

Another Trump Sucker


cjones11152019

Trump’s former ambassador to the United Nations, Nikki Haley, has a new book out, called “With All Due Respect,” of which she can be proud that it doesn’t kiss as much Trump ass as Don Jr’s book, “Triggered.” But just barely.

What’s up with all these people putting Trump books out at the same time? Sheesh, people. Give it a rest (an inside joke which you’ll be in on by Thursday).

Nikki was thought of as a Republican with principles, back when there were at least more than two of them in the nation. As governor of South Carolina, she removed the Confederate flag from the statehouse after a racist killed nine people at a black church in Charleston. During the 2016 presidential primaries, she didn’t just endorse Marco Rubio because she believed he was the best candidate. She endorsed him while strongly speaking out against Donald Trump. She said, “During anxious times, it can be tempting to follow the siren call of the angriest voices. We must resist that temptation.” She failed in her resistance.

By the time the Republican National Convention rolled around, she was on the Trump train. After Trump was elected, she resigned as governor to be ambassador to the United Nations. For a governor, padding foreign policy onto your resume is very valuable. But how valuable is it when you served as an ambassador of a body that openly laughed at Donald Trump? The United Nations doesn’t respect Donald Trump, and he doesn’t respect it either. Trump believes there’s a member nation named Nambia, but even if it did exist, they wouldn’t have much respect for him either. It does sound like a “shithole” country.

In Nikki’s book, she claims she’s the only member of the Trump administration to tell him to his face that his press conference with Russia’s president didn’t go off very well. She claims that afterward, he got much stronger against Russia. She must be thinking of the time he advocated for Russia rejoining the European Union or that other time when he repeated Putin’s argument that the Soviet Union had the right to invade Afghanistan because of terrorism. Or maybe she was thinking of just last week when Trump said he really wanted to go to Russia and watch their May Day parade.

One of the biggest takeaways from the book is her claim that the secretary of state, Rex Tillerson and the chief-of-staff, John Kelly (neither of whom are still with the administration) attempted to recruit her to join their mini resistance. As I pointed out already, Nikki doesn’t do resistance well.

Haley writes, “Kelly and Tillerson confided in me that when they resisted the president, they weren’t being insubordinate, they were trying to save the country. Tillerson went on to tell me the reason he resisted the president’s decisions was because, if he didn’t, people would die.”

During an interview with Norah O’Donnell of CBS News that aired Sunday, she said, “Instead of saying that to me, they should have been saying that to the president (sic), not asking me to join them on their sidebar plan. It should have been, go tell the president (sic) what your differences are and quit if you don’t like what he’s doing. But to undermine a president (sic) is really a very dangerous thing, and it goes against the Constitution and it goes against what the American people want. And it was offensive.”

I don’t know if it goes against the Constitution to not enforce a directive of the president, or to wait him out until he forgets it (as others have claimed to do), or to try to change his mind. But do you know what is in the Constitution, Nikki? Bribery. Bribery, as in the president should be impeached if he commits it.

Donald Trump’s attempt to bribe a foreign leader with U.S. military aid to help his reelection campaign is probably just one example of Trump fuckery so dangerous and stupid, that members of his staff were subverting his efforts. Take a look at his phone call with Ukraine’s president. Somebody thought it was so bad that it needed to be hidden away inside its own special server.

Tillerson is disputing Haley’s account, but last December, he said, “The president (sic) would say, ‘Here’s what I want to do and here’s how I want to do it.’ And I would have to say to him, ‘Mr. President (sic), I understand what you want to do, but you can’t do it that way. It violates the law.'” Tillerson probably discovered that it went beyond Trump not knowing the law, but to the extent he doesn’t care.

In Bob Woodward’s book, “Fear,” Gary Cohn, the administration’s top economic adviser, removed letters from Trump’s desk removing the U.S. out of NAFTA and a trade agreement with South Korea. In the same book, there’s a revelation that James Mattis, then the defense secretary, ignored Trump’s orders to assassinate Syria’s Bashar al-Assad.

According to Haley, each of those instances of insubordination was unconstitutional.

In the New York Times Op-Ed by Anonymous, who claims to be a senior aide in Trump’s White House, he or she claims “many Trump appointees have vowed to do what we can to preserve our democratic institutions while thwarting Mr. (sic) Trump’s more misguided impulses until he is out of office.”

Haley is trying to present herself as being bold and independent enough to stand up to Donald Trump while still appeasing his supporters by kissing his ass. She can’t have it both ways. While she may be dreaming of replacing Mike Pence on the 2020 ticket (it could happen) and becoming a future Republican president, she’s not an example of courage within this administration.

If you want to see courage, look no further than those testifying this week against the administration. If you want examples of asskissers, toadies, suckups, lackeys, sycophants, grovelers, fawners, bootlickers, apple polishers, and ball washers, there are plenty to choose from in Washington (Lindsey Graham, Jeff Sessions, Mike Pence, etc), but today, let’s look at Nikki Haley.

Someday, all these asskissers will have to defend their time as sycophants. Haley will be doing so while also trying to explain her experience with Trump’s failed foreign policy where all roads led to Russia.

With “all due respect,” Nikki, you’re just another sycophant who put cult worship over country.

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Laughing With Nikki


cjones10132018

The United States’ ambassador to the United Nations is doing something unusual. She’s leaving the Trump administration without her middle finger in the air. She’s not being forced out for a scandal, quitting in anger, or discovering she’s being fired through Twitter while sitting on a toilet.

The former governor of South Carolina is one of the few high-profile women in the Trump administration. Sources within the White House say she’s leaving because of fatigue (we’re all fatigued from this administration, Nikki) and that she wanted to leave before the midterms to avoid embarrassing Trump in case the election doesn’t go his way, which it probably won’t.

Haley is staying until the end of the year and Trump says he’ll name her successor within the next three weeks. One name that’s popped up is his daughter, Ivanka. Yes. Seriously. Haley said that Ivanka’s husband, Mr. Ivanka is “such a hidden genius that no one understands.” She’s right. I don’t understand that statement. Referring to the couple, she also said, “Ivanka has been just a great friend, and they do a lot of things behind the scenes that I wish more people knew about.” We do too. We’d love to know what they’re doing behind the scenes. Maybe it would explain why our government punishes nations that refuse to give loans to Jared’s company.

Haley is also one of the few in the administration with her reputation still intact. She was critical of Trump before he became the nominee, saying we shouldn’t be tempted by his hatred and calling for him to release his taxes, yet she eagerly accepted the UN post. She has aspirations for higher office and needed experience with foreign policy. But, how well can she run for office in the future on a platform of Trump’s foreign policy?

During her tenure, she announced new sanctions against Russia only for the White House to announce the next day that the sanctions weren’t happening and that Haley was confused. The Ambassador responded with, “I don’t get confused.” I’m not sure about that as she had previously warned that a Trump administration could start World War III, and took the job, and now plans to campaign for Trump in 2020. Maybe she is confused.

While Trump has been afraid to level any criticism toward Russia and Vladimir Putin, and sides with the dictator over American intelligence, Haley has strongly criticized Russia.

Also, during her tenure, the U.S. embassy in Israel was moved to Jerusalem, which the rest of the civilized world disagreed with. Then, Haley announced she was “taking names” at the United Nations of the countries that voted to reject Trump’s move of the embassy. The U.S. also stripped funding for the Palestinians and pulled out of the Iran Nuclear Agreement.

Representing The United States, she voted against a U.N. resolution titled “The Question of the Death Penalty”, which condemned the use of capital punishment when “applied arbitrarily or in a discriminatory manner” and specifically condemned “the imposition of the death penalty as a sanction for specific forms of conduct, such as apostasy, blasphemy, adultery and consensual same-sex relations.” What in that language did the Trump administration find disagreeable? That vote went in line with the U.S. withdrawal from the U.N.’s Human Rights Council.

Haley has been accused of violating executive branch regulations against accepting gifts. In 2017, she and her husband accepted seven free flights on luxury private aircraft from three South Carolina businessmen, which is probably worth tens of thousands of dollars. Her defense is that the political donors don’t qualify as donors to her, because they’re friends.

Haley is in debt for over a million dollars, and she has two kids headed to college. So, one reason she may have to resign now is to make some mega bucks for at least a couple of years in the private sector. That sounds much more plausible than the Senate theory.

Some speculate that Trump will fire Attorney General Jeff Sessions after the midterms, replace him with his newest poodle, South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham, and then the governor of that state will appoint the Senate seat to Haley. I don’t think there are teeth to that as she wouldn’t need to resign her U.N. job at this time for that scenario. Joining the Republicans in the Senate would probably make her miss the Iranians and North Koreans at the U.N.

Donald Trump claimed the world was laughing at us during the Obama administration. During his last address to the U.N., the world literally laughed at him. The United States has become a laughingstock during Haley’s tenure at the U.N. While she claimed they weren’t laughing at Trump, but with him, it will be a hurdle in her future.

America’s foreign policy is a mess since Trump took office. We criticize Canada while praising dictators, with the president even stating he “fell in love” with Kim Jong Un. Respect for the United States has decreased significantly.

So, when Haley runs for future office on her accomplishments with Trump’s foreign policy, I hope she notices that they’re NOT laughing with her.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
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Under The Bus


cjones04232018

There’s talk in the media that Donald Trump needs to worry about his attorney/fixer Michael Cohen flipping on him. A former attorney of Trump’s told the Wall Street Journal that it’s basically guaranteed. Trump talked to a lawyer who went straight to the press to blab about it. So much for attorney/client privilege.

To remind us how much of a buffoon he is, Trump called Cohen. Cohen has been known to make recordings between himself and clients, all three of them. So, maybe calling a guy under FBI investigation wasn’t the smartest move. Who’s to say Cohen hasn’t flipped already or that the FBI isn’t bugging him? I think Donald should call him again.

Maybe Trump should worry less about Cohen flipping and be concerned about his ambassador to the United Nations, Nikki Haley. MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough, who is occasionally an idiot, said Nikki Haley will run for president in 2020, and she’ll win. She is not going to run for president in 2020 unless Trump is no longer the incumbent. But, she does have every right to flip on Trump.

Haley endorsed Ted Cruz for president, and then she endorsed Marco Rubio. She criticized the tone of Trump’s campaign and refusal to release his tax returns. She was on hand and laughing along, when Rubio made all the Trump small hands jokes. Now, she works for Trump and is currently residing in sycophantville, where the weather is always stormy.

What changed for Nikki to go to work for Donald Trump? His tone hasn’t changed. He still hasn’t released any tax returns. His hands are still tiny.

Last Friday, Nikki went on CBS and said the Treasury Secretary would announce new sanctions on Russia by Monday if he hadn’t already. The Republican National Committee issued talking points on the new sanctions. Monday came and went without any new sanctions announced.

Reportedly, the president was upset and even screaming and cursing at his television over Haley’s comments. There are not going to be any new sanctions. It’s highly unlikely that Haley was winging foreign policy on live TV or that she had not received an agenda from the administration.

Trump has thrown people who work for him under the bus before. He’s done it to Sean Spicer, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, H.R. McMaster, and Kellyanne Conway. The White House publicly threw Haley under by sending economic adviser Larry Kudlow out to say that “Haley was confused.” This read more like “the little lady was confused.”

Nikki shot back with “with all due respect, I don’t get confused.” This was delivered in the same style of “bless your heart,” which she tweeted at Trump in 2016 when he said South Carolina was embarrassed by her.

Kudlow quickly apologized and tried to get out of the way as fast as possible, but he got scorched. Everyone gets burned who works for Donald Trump. Don’t they see what he does to those who work for him? Don’t they see he doesn’t have loyalty? Don’t they see he destroys career prospects? Haley in 2020? After working for Trump she’ll be lucky to land a gig next to Omarosa on Big Brother.

Nikki, get out now. Get out! Get out! Get out! Get out like you’re the black guy in a horror movie. Get out!!!!

Next time Nikki Haley gets throw under the bus, she’s going to look less like a future presidential contender and more like roadkill.

Here’s the video.

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Trump’s Moll


cjones12252017

Donald Trump and his sycophants boast they’ve restored respect to the United States. It’s like their claim they’re rebuilding the military and the FBI. They’re all lies. The military isn’t in shambles, and they’re actually trying to destroy the credibility of the FBI.

Our nation lost a lot of respect from the rest of the world during the George W. Bush administration. Starting a war on false pretenses, destabilizing it, killing tens of thousands of people, and creating a haven for terrorists will do that. Also, when you attempt to demean an ally who disagrees with you by renaming french fries “freedom fries,” and your president can’t enunciate “nuclear,” respect goes out the window.

Respect toward the United States was rebuilt during the Obama era. Speaking coherently helps.

Respect for our nation is again falling into a gutter. The world looks toward Angela Merkel and Justin Trudeau to be champions of freedom and democracy, not Donald Trump.

People don’t respect you when they play to your vanities. They don’t respect you when it works. They don’t respect patronizing Nazis and pedophiles, verbally attacking women and minorities, and they don’t respect when you call the first line of freedom, a free press, enemies of your nation.

You are not respected when you deny there was an attack on your democracy by a hostile nation, despite your own intelligence agencies verifying it. Failing to protect your country, which you’ve sworn to do, is not respected.

You are not respected by expressing admiration for thugs, bullies, and autocrats who lead China, Russia, Turkey, and the Philippines.

You are not respected by pulling out of the Paris climate treaty, something that only one other nation in the world refuses to join.

When you proclaim Jerusalem, which the world recognizes as occupied territory, as Israel’s capital, you lose respect. When every single nation in the world disagrees with you, you lose respect. When your action gets your nation thrown out of the peace talks, you lose respect.

When your vice president is an ass-kissing weasel, you lose respect. When your entire party follows suit with the ass kissing, you lose respect.

When nearly half the nation selects a narcissistic, juvenile, sexist, racist, anti-Semitic ignoramus as its leader, the nation loses respect.

When you threaten to start World War 3, you lose respect. When you refer to your enemy, who has nuclear weapons, as “little rocket man,” you lose respect. When you lose a war of insults with Kim Jong Un, you lose respect and people start to believe you are a “dotard.”

When you send your ambassador to the United Nations to threaten and intimidate its members on how they vote in a meaningless, non-binding measure, you lose respect. When you threaten your allies, tell them you’re “taking names,” and will withhold financial assistance in the future if they don’t do what you want, you lose respect. When you attempt the aforementioned, ignoring the reality that there are upcoming votes that do serve your interest, you lose respect because they think you’re an idiot.

And your ambassador, who was formerly respected, has lost all respect.

And that’s the way it is, see…

Creative notes: This is kind of how I get an idea. I read the story of Nikki Haley attempting to intimidate the world at the United Nations. Immediately I think of how it’s Christmas time, and she’s putting everyone on a naughty list. The problem is, since it’s my first thought then other cartoonists will be drawing it. There’s always one, two, or 20 cartoonists who go for the first and most obvious idea and, I’ve seen a couple already. My second thought is how Trump is trying to use gangster diplomacy.

I thought of old-time gangsters and I google “who finished every sentence with ‘see’?” It was Edward G. Robinson who was in the film Key Largo. Then, I google images of Edward G. Robinson. And, just to cover my bases, I read his Wikipedia page, which I do for everyone I’m going to cover or who inspires a cartoon. Honestly though, the true inspiration is probably the caricature of him in the 1946 Bugs Bunny cartoon “Racketeer Rabbit.” I also googled gangster and 1920s slang for “party,” but I couldn’t find one.

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Darling Nikki


cjones11272016

I have one newspaper client in South Carolina. When they read the first panel of this cartoon they’ll probably think “hey, alright. He did something on our governor” and then they’ll hit the next panel and say “oh god no.”

Sometimes I like to tease my readers on social media on what my next cartoon will contain. Today I teased that it would contain nudity. Normally when I say something like that you can expect something disgusting with Donald Trump, Newt Gingrich, or Chris Christie. Sometimes I draw stuff you can’t unsee. I’m a stinker.

But today I promised my followers nudity and now I’m delivering. None of my newspapers may run it, but hey look! Naked lady! Booty! My online clients will run it. They’re freaks. I normally save these type of things for a weekend cartoon.

The statement in the first paragraph was delivered by South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley as part of her response to the State of the Union delivered by the president. A lot of Republicans were very unhappy with it. Nikki was standing her ground. She endorsed Ted Cruz, then Marco Rubio and wasn’t having any of Trump’s hatred. She was resisting his “siren call of hatred.”

And then the Republican convention rolled around, Nikki was out of Cubans, and she fell in line faster than Mitt Romney in a chocolate milk line. And yeah…faster than Mitt. According to some sources the Trump team wants him to apologize to the president-elect publicly. Just eviscerate himself in front of the entire world and then he can be Secretary of State. It doesn’t cost much. Just your soul and integrity. If they don’t like the taste of Trump’s butt in their mouth they can borrow some mouthwash from Chris Christie. He’s buying it wholesale.

You often see politicians join the team of a candidate they criticized in the primaries. That’s politics. George H.W. Bush referred to Reagan’s economic plan as “Voodoo Economics” and then he became his running mate and eventually vice president and advocated Voodoo Economics for eight years. But nobody faced as much repulsion and backlash as Trump and now all those people, the ones with morals and convictions, are no more ethical than a corner prostitute hanging outside Trump Tower.

“Darling Nikki” is a song from Prince and it was on the “Purple Rain” soundtrack. It’s nasty. It is oh so nasty. It is one of the few songs from that album that wasn’t played on the radio, as the rest of that soundtrack was all over the radio when it came out. You couldn’t escape it. They played those songs almost as often as they did when Prince died.

Years later the Foo Fighters covered it as a b-side (that’s normally a song an artist records and they don’t put it on their album but they place it as candy on the flip side of a single). A few years later Prince performed in the Super Bowl and covered a segment of the Foo’s “Best Of You.” Prince was well known as being very protective of his songs. If you don’t believe me try to find one on YouTube right now that’s not an official video. Weird Al never did get to parody any Prince music. Many people felt Prince’s covering of the Foo’s tune was a dig back at them but I don’t think so. You don’t insult someone by covering their song at the Super Bowl Halftime Show. I think Prince was saying thank you.

And yes, Darling Nikki is nasty.

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Party With Nikki


cjones01142016

South Carolina governor Nikki Haley delivered the Republican response to the president’s State of the Union address and a lot of Republicans are livid. To be fair, many Republicans were supportive, but the racist wing of it freaked out.

Haley said the GOP were partly responsible for our nation’s problems. Uh oh! Then she said the party needs to calm down regarding immigration. That’s when everything hit the fan and splattered all over the ceiling. Republicans are still smarting over Haley’s removal of the hate flag from her state capitol’s grounds.

Nikki Haley was born to a Sikh Indian family in South Carolina. Ann Coulter tweeted that Donald Trump should deport her. She’s as American, if not more, than you, Ann. Where ya’ gonna deport her to? And I didn’t realize Trump had deportation authority.

Rush Limbaugh, that jolly pill-popping bastard, said “this is to me one of the greatest bits of evidence that the Republican party is not just anti conservative but it is very much pro elite.” Good news, Rusho. You’re wrong. You’re party is still warm and inviting to racists everywhere. Apparently if you’re not a knuckle-dragging troglodyte you’re an elitist.

Her message was primarily aimed at Donald Trump and to a lesser extent, Ted Cruz. Trump responded that Haley is weak on immigration and that he’s leading the polls in her state.

Ted Cruz didn’t respond to her speech as he was too busy watching Canadian curling.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Ditching The Flag


cjones06232015

The first response that Nikki Haley, governor of South Carolina, should have had after the massacre at Emanuel AME Church should have been to call for removing the Confederate Battle flag from the grounds of the state capitol. Haley and several GOP candidates for president spent a few days defending the flag or trying to avoid the issue.

On Monday Haley called for the flag to come down. Several Republicans have followed suit and in Mississippi a Republican in the legislature is calling for that state to remove the emblem from their state flag.
As Haley called for bringing the flag down she talked about understanding how many view the flag with pride, as a symbol of heritage and history. Of course she had to say that. That’s South Carolina. They once threw out a Republican governor for calling for the removal of the flag.
Will removing the flag stop racists from being racists? No but will stop governments from aligning themselves with racist movements, thus appearing to endorse them.
With the flag on top of the state capitol and then on the grounds, South Carolina was giving the finger to every black citizen of their state. They say there’s two ways to look at the flag and they were only respecting the one. The one that offended. For decades they ignored that the state house also belonged to the minority population in the state. That’s some serious racism.
A lot of people use the tired defense of the flag that it’s history, heritage, honoring those who fought for the South. I’m going to try to put this in a way those defenders can understand: It doesn’t matter what you think.
Why doesn’t it matter what you think? Because you are using lies and reinterpretations of history to base your argument.
The flag didn’t have anything to do with South Carolina (or Mississippi, or Georgia) during the Civil War. The present one on the grounds of the state capitol was the battle flag for the Army Of Tennessee. The one that was on their dome was the battle flag for the Army Of Northern Virginia.

It was adopted by the Ku Klux Klan when it formed in Tennessee. In 1862 the flag was put on top of the Capitol dome in South Carolina to rebel against the Civil Rights movement and desegregation. Nice.
Here’s another factoid for you: The Civil War was fought by the South to preserve slavery. South Carolina was the first state to attack the north (Southerners love to talk about northern aggression. That’s like saying Poland was aggressive to Nazis). South Carolina was the first to secede and in their statement of secession there is heavy mention that the reasoning was because the north elected a president “hostile” to slavery. The war was about slavery. End of discussion.
That flag is not your heritage unless you had a relative in the Army of Northern Virginia or Army Of Tennessee. Hang it in your yard or fly it from your mobile home. That’s fine. Do what you want on your private property. The only other way the flag is your heritage is if your ancestors were members of the KKK.
The Confederacy had a very short life. For Southerners wanting to be proud of their heritage why do they only cling to four years of it? The Nazis and the Swastika flew over Germany much longer and you don’t see that nation clinging to that as their heritage.
The Confederate flag represents hate, segregation and hate. Unless you’re for those, put the flag away.
The other thing is, why are you proud of being a traitor?
I’d like to congratulate the GOP on joining the 21st century, some what. Where ya’ been?
Here’s the rough.
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