Middle East

Classified Pain In The Butt


cjones05272017

I want to play poker with Donald Trump. The man does not have a poker face. He has a Cheeto face, but not a poker face. If you ask him if he wants to call your raise he’d tell you that he doesn’t have a full house.

There’s been a lot of talk in the news how Russian spies can hoodwink Americans to become moles without their ever knowing it. I would be very skeptical of that if we weren’t talking about the sort of people Trump hires, and even Trump himself (who has hired a lawyer to defend him from impeachment and charges of colluding with Russians…who has worked for Russians). Have you seen an interview with Carter Page? That guy couldn’t pick a number between one and three. The Russian spies even described Page as an idiot while they were attempting to recruit him, which is what made him a juicy target.

When news broke that Trump gave highly classified information to the Russians there was speculation that the intel was provided to the United States from Israel. There was concern the Russians could figure that out, and even who the agents are gathering the intelligence. It was never reported that Trump told them it came from Israel.

So naturally while in Israel Trump told the entire world that the intel came from the Israelis. He wasn’t even asked when he told the press that he never mentioned Israel to the Russians. Israeli prime minister Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu has found himself in the same position as Republicans. He has to smile and support a man to get what he wants while trying to ignore the fact that the man is an idiot.

While on his tour of the Middle East and Europe, foreign leaders and diplomats have been coached to flatter Trump. They’re to compare him favorably to Obama and compliment him on his electoral victory. The man is a pushover.

Donald Trump isn’t just simple-minded enough to manipulate, for our friends and foes alike. He’s not just dangerously insecure and intellectually ill-equipped to do his job. He can’t keep his mouth shut. Along with those high negatives, Trump puts his ego over national security.

Donald Trump is a national security risk and it’s time for America to fold this hand and move on. He’s a pain in the ass. Just ask Bibi.

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Radical Nut Job


cjones05252017

Before he was elected president with fewer votes than his female Democratic party opponent, Donald Trump loved to toss around the term “radical Islamic terrorism.” Now that he’s president and visiting Saudi Arabia where the kingdom is praising his narcissism, surrounding him with bright and shiny objects, and they’re all dancing with swords, he’s found substitutes for the term.

Trump criticized Hillary Clinton and President Obama for avoiding the phrase. It takes a complex mind to understand that using that phrasing is describing an entire religion as “radical.” Often times in the past Trump was even blunter by saying “Islam hates us.”

During Trump’s current tour of the Middle East (where he said he just arrived from, while he was in Israel) and during his speech to over 50 leaders from Muslim nations, he used the term “Islamist,” which is accepted as characteristic of the fanatical extremists and violent fringes, such as the Islamic State and al-Qaeda. Referring to a religion as “radical” isn’t friendly, nice, or used by someone who understands complexities. When you put “Islam” before “terrorists,” it’s insulting an entire religion. You never hear conservatives or Republicans refer to a white guy who shoots up a black church or an abortion clinic as a “radical Christian.”

I’m sure conservatives, such as Ted Cruz, who bashed Clinton and Obama for avoiding the phrase will give Trump a pass for doing the same. Now if we can just get these simple minds to understand the difference between “illegal immigrants” and “undocumented workers.”

Trump does enjoy insulting people. He once slammed Morning Joe co-host Mika Brzezinski as “Dumb Mika,” and George Will as “Stupid George Will.” His most famous school-yard bullying insults were “Lyin’ Ted” for Ted Cruz (which is hard to argue with) and “Crooked Hillary” for Hillary Clinton.

The final 6:00 PM breaking news from last week was last Friday when it was reported that Trump called former FBI director Jim Comey a “nut job.” Am I the only one who believes Trump is projecting? He once called Hillary Clinton “Putin’s puppet” and made fun of Rand Paul’s hair.

When Trump insulted Comey he was talking to the Russians in the Oval Office. He was informing them that he was working diligently to cover up their investment in him. It is kinda bizarre that the man who hired the likes of Michael “Lock Her Up” Flynn, and Kellyanne “Microwaves Are Bugging Us” Conway would refer to the director of the FBI as a “nut job.”

No, Mr. President. “Nut jobs” are those people who voted for you and believe all this “Russia stuff” is fake news.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Freedom, Fear And Hummus


cjones12072015

I’m exhausted. I’m tired of the militant gun crowd screaming for more guns. I’m tired of Republicans who believe it’s OK to sell guns to people they put on the no-fly list. Mostly I’m tired of bigotry and the support it’s gaining.

Obama issued a rare Oval Office address Sunday night in attempt to beef up confidence in his handling of ISIS. He also appealed for the public to be rational toward those of the Islamic faith.

While the public has very little faith in the president’s handling of terrorism, the Republican candidates are scaring the Hell out of those who are more pragmatic.

The GOP candidates aren’t just selling fear. They’re selling hate, bigotry and outright racism. Most of them are calling for the rejection of Syrian refugees entering the country (though there hasn’t been any acts of terrorism by anyone who entered the country through the refugee process). Trump says we should kill the terrorists’ families and put mosques under surveillance. Ted Cruz wants to strip citizenship of suspected terrorists and responded to the latest mass shooting by holding a rally at a gun range. Even the most mainstream of the candidates, Jeb Bush, says we should only accept Christian refugees. Worst of all, they’re selling the fear that you’re not safe unless you own a semi-automatic weapon and carry it with you at all times.

The candidates bigotry wouldn’t be so alarming if it wasn’t gaining so much support. That’s what I’m tired of. I’m tired of people blaming Muslims and trying to smear the entire faith as violent. I’m tired of people who are only concerned with Muslim killers, but not white killers, or Christian killers.

In other news, many of the Republican candidates spoke to the Jewish Coalition. Of course they pandered. Every candidate, Republican and Democrat pander to whatever group they’re speaking to at the time. But some of these guys really got into the stereotypes. Jim Gilmore (yes, he’s still in the race) said he’s seen Schindler’s List. Jeb Bush informed the crowd that he knows what Hannukah is. Ted Cruz said a vote for Hillary is a vote for the Ayatollah to nuke Israel. John Kasich said if you want a good friend, find one who’s Jewish. Rick Santorum mentioned he worked with a Jew in the Senate. Donald Trump told them he knows how much they like their money and how good of negotiators they are. I’m shocked none of the candidates referred to Obama as a schlemiel.

The funniest part was Ben Carson who seemed to be reading directly from a Wikipedia entry. In referencing Hamas, Ben Carson pronounced it “hummus.” Apparently the good doctor has never had a conversation in his life about the Middle East and heard the proper pronunciation. Let’s just hope he never orders an appetizer of Hamas with flat bread.

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