John Fetterman

I Am Draw Cartoon

Did you watch the debate between Pennsylvania Senate candidates Democrat John Fetterman and Republican Mehmet Crudites Oz? Did you at least watch the highlights? If so, did you mute or turn away out of the sheer awkwardness of it all? I watched the highlights and I wanted to turn away. It was painful and uncomfortable for me.

Let’s face facts, my liberal friends. Fetterman didn’t come off well. Not only did he not sound well but he didn’t look good. Who’s responsible for putting Fetterman into a suit that made him look like Uncle Fester? I know he’s not a suit guy but the Democratic campaign could have done a lot better than picking something off the rack at Burlington Coat Factory. At the very least, they should have Men’s Wearhoused that shit.

Fetterman suffered from a stroke and had to do a live debate against a guy who has 20 years experience of selling snake oil on TV. The odds are tough enough for Fetterman.

The debate marked the first time voters were able to watch Fetterman unscripted on live television since his stroke in May, which was just days before the state’s primary. Fetterman relied on closed captioning during the debate so he could follow the conversation as he continues to recover from auditory and speech difficulties. Yes, Fetterman had a stroke which makes him suffer from these issues. What’s Donald Trump’s excuse. Oh my god. Did Donald Trump have a stroke and his administration hid it? He did have that secret trip to the hospital.

Fetterman had trouble communicating during the debate. He failed to complete sentences, stumbled over words, and there were long awkward pauses. All this may have distracted viewers from noticing the lying piece of crap that is Mehmet Oz, who mostly lives in a New Jersey mansion, bought a farm in Pennsylvania for the race, and is currently staying with his inlaws in PA.

Since Dr. Oz can’t seem to keep up with how many homes he owns when it was time to list them on financial disclosure forms, or he’s just flat-out lying, let me offer an assist. He owns the Pennsylvania farm, a mansion in New Jersey, a condo in New Jersey, two condos in Manhattan (one of which his sister is suing him over for stiffing her on rental income), a cattle ranch in Florida where he claims he hunts despite not having a hunting license (does he shoot his cows?), a mansion in Palm Beach, and three properties in Turkey, of which he’s still a citizen and says he’ll renounce if he wins. Oh, don’t do us any favors, Dr. Crudite. Additionally, his wife “technically” owns a mansion in Maine and a hotel in Ireland.

Several analysts said the debate proves Fetterman isn’t prepared to be a Senator and should instead focus on his health. They may be right, but voters should vote for him anyway. He’s improving and he’s better than Oz. A bag of flaming poo is better than Oz, who will vote to ban abortion nationwide. Sending Dr. Crudite to the Senate may give Republicans that 51st vote to ban abortion. And I assure you of this: If the GOP gains control of the Senate, they will do away with the filibuster to ban abortion.

During the debate, Oz sang and danced around answering direct questions about banning abortion, although it’s something he’s vowed in the past.

Republicans of course rejoiced at Fetterman’s performance because they’re evil twisted psychopathic fucks. They celebrated when Fetterman had his stroke. And to be honest, his campaign didn’t help matters by trying to bury the fact he had a stroke.

I’m mad at the Fetterman campaign. My problems extend beyond the crappy $35 suit they put the candidate in. They never should have put him on the debate stage. Normally, I want every race to have a debate, but this one served to give the wrong impression. If you read the transcripts and the points he made, Fetterman did OK. If you watch the debate, he did horribly.

Sure, the campaign would have been attacked for refusing to debate, but they should have weathered that. Again, they put him on stage against a slick con man with decades of TV experience and evil-sculpted eyebrows.

The people who are now attacking Fetterman for his difficulties communicating and expressing his thoughts ignore the cognitively challenged in their own party, from Marjorie Taylor Greene to Herschel Walker to Trump. My god, they sent racist Tommy Tuberville to the Senate and he doesn’t know the three branches of government. I’m not making that up.

These Republicans are not going to stop being uninformed stupid racist hacks, but John Fetterman’s cognitive abilities will improve. The fact he was able to perform on that stage last night should be applauded. And he didn’t whip out any props.

And that’s just it for the MAGA crowd. Herschel can whip out a badge and say “I am work with many police officers” and receive high praise while Fetterman struggles because of a stroke, and is accused of not being cognitively there.

The same people attacking Fetterman now want to reinstate the guy who said, “Person, woman, man, camera, TV.”

Music note: I listened to Toad the Wet Sprocket while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Horton Hears A Race-Baiting

The race for Pennsylvania’s open senate seat between John Fetterman and Mehmet Oz is becoming more intense…and hateful.

Lieutenant Governor John Fetterman, the Democrat, advocated for the release of Dennis and Lee Horton, long-incarcerated brothers serving life sentences for second-degree murder in a 1993 armed robbery. The brothers’ sentences were commuted last year by Governor Tom Wolf. The brothers have always maintained their innocence.

The brothers claim they were pulled over by police after giving a friend a ride, not knowing he was fleeing the cops. Some witnesses claim the brothers were assailants while police files document another person as the shooter. Prison administrators supported the brother’s case for clemency.

Dennis and Lee now work for the Fetterman campaign and the crudité-eating Republican candidate who actually lives in New Jersey has called for the Democratic campaign to fire them.

Oz’s campaign has released an ad with a narrator saying, “We all know Fetterman loves free stuff, we can’t let him free murderers.” Other ads have referred to the brothers as “thugs.” Oz’s campaign has created a website called “Inmates for Fetterman.” Guess what color the two brothers are.

When Oz and Republicans aren’t attacking Fetterman’s health, they’re lying about his record on crime…and it’s working. The polls in the state are narrowing which many are crediting to the attack ads from Oz on crime.

The attacks on the release of Dennis and Lee Horton bring another Horton to mind, William.

In 1998, William Horton became the focus of George H.W. Bush’s presidential campaign.

William Horton was serving a life sentence for murder without the possibility of parole in Massachusetts. He was allowed to participate in a weekend furlough program, which he did not return from, and eventually committed assault, armed robbery, and rape in Maryland where he remains in prison today. He became the poster boy for the Bush campaign.

Bush’s opponent, Massachusetts Governor Michael Dukakis, was hammered for William Horton’s crimes even though it was a Republican governor who had signed the law legalizing the weekend furlough program. Dukakis was a supporter of the program and did veto a bill that would have restricted the furloughs of first-degree murderers, which Horton was.

Bush’s campaign manager Lee Atwater said, “By the time we’re finished, they’re going to wonder whether Willie Horton is Dukakis’s running mate.” Most people today can’t tell you who was Dukakis’ running mate but they remember Willie Horton.

Groups loosely affiliated with the Bush campaign (so the Bush campaign could say, “hey, that’s not us with the hate ads) began airing ads about the “revolving door” and “weekend passes” featuring Horton’s mug shot and screaming “Willie,” though William Horton had never gone by Willie in his entire life. Why did the Republicans need to see Horton’s face? Why did they need to call him “Willie?”

Today, the ad is used as a textbook example of racism and dog whistles in politics. It was the most racist presidential campaign in history until “Build the wall.”

Republicans learned long before the Willie Horton ads that racism worked to win elections. Look into Southern Strategy where the Republican Party learned how to say the n-word without saying the n-word.

Lee Atwater described the Southern Strategy in an interview saying, “You start out in 1954 by saying, ‘Nigger, nigger, nigger.’ By 1968 you can’t say ‘nigger’—that hurts you. Backfires. So you say stuff like forced busing, states’ rights and all that stuff. You’re getting so abstract now [that] you’re talking about cutting taxes, and all these things you’re talking about are totally economic things and a byproduct of them is [that] blacks get hurt worse than whites. And subconsciously maybe that is part of it. I’m not saying that. But I’m saying that if it is getting that abstract, and that coded, that we are doing away with the racial problem one way or the other. You follow me—because obviously sitting around saying, ‘We want to cut this,’ is much more abstract than even the busing thing, and a hell of a lot more abstract than Nigger, nigger.'”

Lee Atwater sure seemed to really like saying that word though.

Racism worked in 1954 and it still works today. Glenn Youngkin won the Virginia governorship running on a campaign warning of Critical Race Theory being taught in schools, which isn’t actually being taught in any schools. Republicans are crafting laws outlawing Critical Race Theory from schools or any American history courses that will make white kids feel guilty. Seriously.

“Critical Race Theory” is more abstract than the n-word. Atwater would have loved it.

Oz is hoping dog whistles will work in Pennsylvania and is telling voters that Fetterman will release black murderers to kill white Pennsylvania grandmothers.

Oz is saying the n-word without saying the n-word.

Music note: I listened to Kaiser Chiefs while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Wegner, Oz, and Crudités

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday

When Dr. Oz made a campaign video for his Senate campaign where he’s pretending to be an ordinary flesh-and-blood human being and not a millionaire robot in a grocery store for the first time in his life, he revealed just how out of touch he is with the people whose votes he’s asking for. It came off like Mr. Burns’ race for governor when he made a campaign event out of having dinner at one of his employees’ homes.

For Oz, it was like, “so this is where all the troglodytes shop.” Too bad there wasn’t a three-headed fish in his buggy.

Oz was complaining about prices in the produce aisle, which was the first sign he had never been in one before. It also didn’t look good when he asked if each shopping cart came with a chauffeur (I made that up. They probably edited it out).

The next gaffe was while shopping at Redner’s, he confused and combined it with Wegman’s, and referred to the place as “Wegners.” Yeah, first time in a grocery store. Also, we have a Wegman’s here and if that’s where you’re shopping to be like the common man, well la-dee-da you. If you want to know what prices are for everyone, you don’t find them at Wegman’s. Redner’s, I don’t know about.

Then, he said he was purchasing produce to make a plate of Crudités. Now you burger and beer people might be asking, “What the fuck is a Crudité?” Honestly, I had to ask too.

It’s the correct terminology, so Dr. Oz didn’t get it wrong. Crudités are a plate of sliced raw vegetables. You know, the stuff that comes with your chicken wings. Yeah, those. But in addition to carrots and celery, a plate of crudités may also feature baby corn, bell peppers, cucumbers, broccoli, fennel, etc. Who the fuck eats something called “fennel?” I don’t. Maybe I should. As I said, Dr. Oz was correct in calling it “crudités,” but he was also wrong because nobody…and I mean nobody, ever calls a plate of vegetables “crudités.” Most people, except for billionaires and their robotic surrogates, call plates of vegetables, “plates of vegetables.” Maybe they’ll go with veggie platter. But nobody says, “crudités.”

Seriously, it was a Mr. Burns move, attempting to relate to the swill that lives beneath him.

Within 24 hours of the video’s release, Oz’s opponent, John Fetterman, raised over $500,000 from it. Typically when you make a campaign video, it’s supposed to make money for your campaign, not your opponent’s. It was so bad, that even Tucker Carlson was laughing at it. Usually, the only thing that makes Tucker laugh is separating brown babies from their parents and locking them in dog crates.

It’s shit like this from the crop of Trumpian-endorsed Senate candidates that has Mitch McConnell giving up on retaking the Senate.

Creative note: This was published Sunday morning and in all that time between now and then, nobody noticed the one Easter egg I hid in this cartoon. Shame on you. Shame on the lot of you. Hint: It’s amongst the crudités

Music note: I listened to some Radiohead while drawing this last Friday (start the blog on Friday and add the music note because I know I won’t remember by the time I’m ready to publish the blog).

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: