FEMA

Bid For Your Life


cjones03312020

Maybe Donald Trump should wait until every state has the ventilators they need before he starts prognosticating on what date (selected because it’s “beautiful”) we can all return to normal lives. Only “normal” in the sense we could go outside, work, school, and get within six feet of other human beings. Not “normal” in the sense that Donald Trump is president.

As part of their deflecting of responsibility, Trump supporters blame Obama for not stockpiling medical masks during his presidency. Never mind the absolute unfortunate fact that Donald Trump has been president (sic) for the past three years and didn’t do anything about stockpiling medical masks in that time. He spent more time tweeting at Meryl Streep than preparing for a pandemic. Never mind the fact that his administration was warned by the Obama administration that a pandemic would probably hit the nation. But then again, Obama also told him not to hire Michael Flynn.

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has shown more leadership ability than Donald Trump in dealing with this crisis. He’s given a press conference every day without making it a mini-campaign rally. He’s been blunt, factual, and realistic. He understands the problem because over half of all coronavirus cases in this nation are in the state of New York. In contrast, Donald Trump has downplayed and lied about the pandemic. Even after a new poll revealed a 60% approval of his handling of the pandemic, he’s continued to lie. And, he’s lying about New York and Andrew Cuomo.

New York needs 30,000 ventilators. They have 7,000. The federal government has only sent 400. In case you’re a Republican, 400 and even 7,000 are less than 30,000. And Donald Trump has claimed that Cuomo rejected a 2015 recommendation to purchase 15,000 ventilators and instead “established death panels” and “lotteries.” It should be needless to say, but Donald Trump’s claims are lies.

The states are begging Donald Trump to activate the Defense Production Act, which he has refused to do as he’s afraid it’ll step on the toes of big business and make him a socialist. We give huge tax breaks and bailouts to corporations, not demands that they support their country.

The Defense Production Act of 1950, enacted during the Korean War, allows the federal government to compel companies through loans and purchase commitments to develop specific equipment for national defense. Donald Trump says, “We don’t need it.”

Since we “don’t need it,” states, hospitals, and even FEMA are bidding against each other for medical supplies like ventilators, N95 masks, medicals gowns, and other supplies. Cuomo explained it best. He said, “because you have manufacturers who sit there and California offers them $4, and they say well California offered $4, I offer $5 and another state calls in and offers $6. It’s not the way to do it.”

As Cuomo pointed out, because he’s the adult in the room, “The Defense Production Act just says you can tell a company to manufacture this many by this date. Yes, it is an assertion of government power on private sector companies, yes. But so what. This is a national emergency.”

Hospitals are reusing masks. Masks that have expired are being used. Now, New York City plans to make patients share ventilators. Most medical professionals discourage sharing ventilators but acknowledge in a crisis like this, where the federal government is refusing to step up, it has to be done.

Instead of being presidential, Trump would rather attack governors who point out he’s not doing his job. He said that governors have to be “nice” to him to get what they need. So if you have the coronavirus, you might die if your governor doesn’t kiss Donald Trump’s ass.

Washington Governor Jay Inslee told Donald Trump that the nation needs a Tom Brady, as in a quarterback to win the game. Donald Trump, being unable to grasp even small concepts, took it as a compliment and thought he was being compared to Tom Brady and pointed out that he knew Tom and Tom knows him and he talked to Tom the other day and he’s the most special boy in the room so he gets the most cake and two scoops of ice cream while everyone else only gets one, etc, etc. He also pointed out that Inslee was a “failed” presidential candidate which I’m sure we can all agree is really important to focus on at this time.

Trump also attacked the governor of Michigan Gretchen Whitmer (whose name he forgot). He told Sean Hannity, “We’ve had a big problem with the young, a woman governor, you know who I’m talking about from Michigan. We don’t like to see the complaints.”

How dare that “woman governor” complain because Donald Trump doesn’t like to see complaints. He said, “all she does is sit there and blame the federal government.” Doesn’t she know he’s a man?

Whitmer tweeted at Trump, “Hi, my name is Gretchen Whitmer, and that governor is me.
I’ve asked repeatedly and respectfully for help. We need it. No more political attacks, just PPEs, ventilators, N95 masks, test kits. You said you stand with Michigan — prove it.” Donald Trump still hasn’t proven it. He’s still jacked up over that Tom Brady comparison.

Hey, if you want to talk about great quarterbacks, Drew Brees just donated $5 million to help Louisiana.

Donald Trump needs to enact the Defense Production Act so states, hospitals, and FEMA don’t have to bid against each other. Andrew Cuomo said, “It’s not the way to do it.” Acting like a sexist and racist toddler while engaging in petty feuds and demanding to have your ass kissed before you’ll do your job isn’t the way to be president.

Donald Trump’s way of being president and handling a crisis is not the way to do it. At the end of this, I hope his administration runs out of oxygen and needs a ventilator. Hopefully, he won’t be able to find one because they’ll all be in New York.

Let me put this in a way Donald Trump can understand: When it comes to quarterbacking this nation and being president and handling a crisis, you’re Ryan Leaf.

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FEMA Gets ICY


cjones09172018

I don’t want to deal you a total shocker, but the Trump administration doesn’t care about you. Donald Trump’s biggest concern is how he is perceived at doing the job he has no interest in doing. Most of Trump’s talk about the incoming hurricane is about how great he’s handled previous hurricanes.

Only three percent of Puerto Rico’s residents say Trump did an “excellent” job responding to Hurricane Maria. Trump claims he got “A pluses” for the job he has done with hurricanes, but to be fair, “Hurricane” may be the first name of several strippers he’s known over the years.

Trump has about as much empathy for hurricane victims as he does for immigrant children. A union representing the country’s 350 immigration judges slammed Attorney General Jeff Sessions for comments he made that suggested they were sidestepping the law and showing too much sympathy when handling certain cases. This is one area where Trump is very happy with Sessions. We can’t have too much sympathy over babies in jail or representing themselves in court.

Now, comes breaking news that the Trump administration has moved $10 million from FEMA to ICE to pay for immigrant detention and deportation. It’s not just ICE where they’re playing this shell game to incarcerate brown babies. They have shifted $200 million from other agencies for incarceration and deportation. Trump hates immigrants so much, that ICE has blown its budget. It’s an asshole agenda.

What became of the claim that conservatives are fiscally responsible? Oh, yeah! That claim has been around forever, it just hasn’t been factual. But, hey. There’s no better time to defund FEMA right before hurricane season. This is the sort of decision brought to you by the same people who thought Trump deodorant would be a big seller. Because everybody wants to smell like Donald Trump. Now, you too can smell like an old racist who’s been in bed all day with cheeseburgers.

FEMA claims none of the money came from their response unit, but that’s actually a lie. Brock Long, the head of FEMA, says there’s “no story here.” But, keep in mind, he is a Trump appointee.

If you’re a Trump supporter and hurricane survivor this year, take comfort that you’ve sacrificed your community to throw more brown babies in jail. Actually, you probably will.

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It’s Raining Mayhem


cjones09082017

I consider myself a well-read person. I read into every issue I cover, and I go down internet worm holes and read stuff that’s not important to anybody. I know stuff. But, there’s a lot of stuff I will never understand.

I don’t understand why now is the best time to revoke DACA, and threaten to deport around 800,000 young adults who were brought to this nation by no choice of their own when they were children. Trump says he only wants people who are educated, working, and can be a benefit to this nation…so why kick 800,000 people out who fit those guidelines? I guess I can understand it if the explanation is that Donald Trump is racist toward brown people. Even if he’s not, his base is racist.

I don’t understand why we’re talking about pumping billions into a useless wall on the border that can be circumvented by a $45 ladder when FEMA is about to run out of money from rebuilding American cities struck by two major hurricanes. I do understand that it’s feeding a racist base, but I don’t understand why anyone, even racists, support something so expensive and useless.

I don’t understand why we argue about the debt ceiling each time it comes up. It’s money that was already agreed upon. I do understand why Republicans wanted to use it to shut down the government during the Obama era, as they were just total obstructionist and hated everything connected to Obama. But why are they threatening a government shutdown while they have the House, Senate, and White House? Don’t Republicans understand they control the government? I do understand why Trump made the magic-bean deal with Democrats, and that’s because he’s not a great deal maker. It was great for Democrats and the nation, but not for Republicans. I think Trump made that deal because if the negotiations were to continue, trying to understand how the debt ceiling works would have confused and exposed him. That, or he was too busy ogling his daughter who had walked into the room. Ew.

I don’t understand people who still deny Climate Change. I understand why Republicans oppose it, as they’re funded by oil companies. I understand why conservative think tanks continue to claim it’s a hoax because they’re funded by oil companies. I do understand why Donald Trump believes it’s a hoax created by China, and that’s because he’s an idiot. An editor wrote me a couple days ago and said he’d never run my work because it’s so divisive. Yeah, OK. But I’m not so divisive that I made the weather and climate partisan issues.

I don’t understand why people listen to Rush Limbaugh. I actually worked with two, TWO, editorial writers at The Free Lance-Star who listened to Rush on a daily basis. The man proves time and time again that he’s an idiot, and he doesn’t understand how anything works in the real world. Yesterday, he told his listeners that these hurricanes are never as bad as advertised, and it’s a conspiracy between the media and advertisers who sell stuff during an impending disaster. I guess Rush didn’t watch any of the footage from Houston. Was Harvey not as bad as advertised? I thought it was actually worse.

Would Rush be pushing this theory if he was still hawking Florida orange juice? Years ago he briefly pitched the orange stuff until the company that hired him realized that most people hate Rush. Most would rather throw oranges at him than take his suggestions on what to drink.

The real danger with Rush is that there are idiots who will believe him. Rush may have put stupid people’s lives in danger. Now that I think about it, it might even out. The one question I want answered is; Will Rush evacuate his Palm Beach home, or will he sit on the beach screaming for Irma to bring it on? I challenge him to do a live show from his front porch during the hurricane. He should put his money where his fat-ass mouth is.

I don’t understand Florida. It’s a really weird place. I don’t understand why people retire to live among giant, flying, creepy, stingy, buzzy things. I don’t like bugs. Reptiles, I can deal with. Currently, there’s a really long fuzzy centipede thingy with antennas and a gazillion legs in my shower that someone needs to come over here and kill it for me.

I don’t understand why there’s only one road out of the Florida Keys. I realize it’s a very long road and it’s difficult to build bridges going over seven miles from island to island, but wouldn’t that be much easier logistically than wasting billions on a wall on the Mexican border that goes over mountains, deserts, rivers, and private property? Hurricane Andrew hit 25 years ago. Couldn’t there have been another road constructed in that time frame? Florida, stop electing Republicans who look like Voldemort.

What I don’t understand is why people are at the stores fighting over bottled water at this time. Their water at home has not been turned off yet. Are we such a spoiled, first-world nation that we’d rather punch a guy over a bottle of Dasani, Voss, or Fiji water than to drink out of the tap? By the way, your tap water’s PH level is around 8.0. Dasani is 4.5, Voss is 6.0, and Fiji is 7.5. That stuff from Walmart is 6.5. In a natural disaster, I think you’ll be OK if you drink from the tap for a few days.

Lastly, what I really don’t understand are Trump sycophants. I understand partisanship, spin, and even loyalty. What I don’t understand is tying your little row boat to a sinking yacht. Everyone has flaws and defects, but Trump is just one big defect. The man has proven he is not anything he’s boasted about himself. He doesn’t know more than the generals. He doesn’t understand how government works. He’s not a great deal maker. He doesn’t have the best brain. He doesn’t have the best words. He didn’t even write the book he brags about writing. If we attached a disaster rating system to human beings, Trump would be a category five.

I don’t understand people who believe Obama is a Muslim, but think Trump is a Christian. I get the worship of a cult of personality….but why of a personality that is so stupid? Some people don’t understand why Trump’s attack on veterans didn’t kill his campaign, or his mocking a handicapped reporter, or his “pussy grabbing,” or the racism, or the stupidity and the not knowing anything. For me, I don’t understand why the ridiculous hair didn’t kill the campaign. This man actually chooses to look the way he does. Would you vote for a guy who knew he had a booger hanging and didn’t do anything about it?

Even if you’re a racist, you’d think you’d find a much more competent racist to follow. There are plenty of racists out there who are able to hide it better and are not displaying it on Twitter on a daily basis. I don’t believe that everyone who voted and supports Trump is a racist. But, I don’t understand why racism is not a deal breaker for the rest of them.

Trump understands two things, and that’s marketing his name and his debt. But even the stuff he’s marketed has gone under. And understanding how to make other people pay for your debt doesn’t mean you understand the federal debt. We’re not gonna get Russian banks to finance the border wall. Quite frankly, I’d be surprised if Trump is capable of dressing himself and tying his shoes.

Regarding Irma: I have friends in Florida. If you’re down there, get out. I do hope the hurricane spares the state from the brunt of its devastation. And if you’re staying, you can drink the tap water. You’ll be fine.

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