FBI

Schnooked By A Crook


cjones05222017

Trump supporters constantly defend their man from accusations he colluded with Russia and their efforts to elect him, hacking into the Clinton campaign and spreading false information. They tell us it’s all a conspiracy or “fake news.” That’s exactly what their golden-showered idol says.

What they don’t do is offer a coherent argument consisting of evidence or even reasons why it’s a conspiracy or “fake news.” Their best defense is to bring up Hillary Clinton’s email server or something Obama did. Hey, that’s the Trump defense too.

Now the dam finally broke and a Special Counsel has been appointed. Trump broke the dam himself as the Assistant Attorney General made the decision yesterday to make the appointment after news broke that fired FBI Director James Comey wrote a memo that Trump wanted him to drop the agency’s own investigation.

The assistant AG made the appointment because Jeff Sessions, the Attorney General, claims he’s recused himself from anything to do with investigating Trump, though he was in on firing Comey and is helping select the replacement.

Former FBI Director Robert Mueller has been named to lead the special investigation. After saying there was no need for a Special Counsel just a few days ago, Trump issued a statement welcoming the investigation as it will clear all this up. The statement was coherent which means someone other than Trump wrote it. Other than the statement, Trump has been strangely quiet on Twitter.

News also came out yesterday that former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn informed the Trump transition team that he was under investigation and yet they still hired him. I don’t think the theory that Trump is hung up on Flynn because he’s Putin’s guy is any less logical than the theory that Trump is loyal.

Republicans have fought against the idea of a Special Counsel yet there seems to be relief from them that it’s finally happened. “Finally” after just four months into the Trump presidency. These guys have been putting party over country for a long time now. Yesterday The Washington Post released a story that Kevin McCarthy, the number two guy in the House, said he believed Trump was being paid by Putin. On top of that juicy nugget, Paul Ryan told everyone present not to leak that information. This happened over a year ago and McCarthy and Ryan both denied it took place until they were informed it was on tape. Then they came clean and said it was a joke. It might have been a half joke.

Trump is close to Putin. He’s hired several people with connections to Putin. They range from Paul Manafort, to Michael Flynn, to Jeff Sessions, to his own son-in-law Jared Kushner.

Trump asked Putin from the campaign trail to help him win the election. He’s fired everyone who was investigating him. He fired Comey after he asked for his loyalty and for him to drop the investigation. He threatened Comey if he dared talk about his meetings with Trump. Trump gave classified intel to Russians in the Oval Office. Now Trump needs to hire a personal lawyer. Since there seems to be a lot of people in the Trump administration with links to Russia, now is a good time to be a white collar lawyer in Washington.

While Donald Trump may be saying he welcomes the Special Counsel, don’t be surprised if he doesn’t fire him. Trump can fire Rod Rosentein, the man who appointed the counsel. Maybe Trump won’t be implicated in the investigation. Maybe it won’t find anything on anyone. Maybe it’ll go after people but leave Trump alone. And maybe it’ll make a case against Trump for colluding with Russia or for his attempts to obstruct justice. If Trump is innocent then he doesn’t have anything to worry about. Does anyone believe Trump is actually innocent?

His supporters don’t believe he’s innocent or they’d make a better case than “Hillary’s emails.” If you’re a Trump supporter you’re either a schnook or a traitor to your country.

Which is it? Schnook or crook?

Update: Trump tweeted this morning. What did he do? He deflected by bringing up Obama and Clinton. See?

 

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Advertisements

Getting The Memo


cjones05212017

Yesterday I was looking forward to covering a subject other than Donald Trump. I had the topic picked. I came up with an idea I liked. All was going to be swell. Then 5:00 PM came around and like the day before, it brought a new scandal. A really big one. Mondays was really big but Tuesdays may have topped it.

U.S. Senator Susan Collins from Maine asked on Monday “Can we have a crisis-free day?” I’m feeling ya’ Senator, but no. No we can’t. Ed Rogers wrote for The Washington Post that with Trump leaving the country for eight days that will lessen the odds of a daily crisis. I don’t share their optimism. Trump is visiting Arab heads of state, going straight to Israel, and then heading to the Vatican. The potential for him pulling stupid out of the hat runs very high. That 300-lb. fat guy is going to walk the tight rope between Jews and Palestinians in Jerusalem. I have faith something’s going “splat!”

If you work in an office then at some point you’ve been asked if you’ve seen a memo. If not, just watch Office Space. Even if you had seen the memo but you blew something off, you may fall back on the excuse and lie and say you haven’t gotten that memo yet. Right now Republicans and anyone else who supports Donald Trump needs to get the memo.

This memo doesn’t contain any new news. It informs you that Donald Trump lies. Donald Trump is a narcissist. He’s an idiot. He’s corrupt. He’s unqualified for the presidency and he doesn’t know what he’s doing. Donald Trump will throw you under the bus and destroy your reputation, even if it’s just to save him a few hours on cable news. If you continue to support Trump, your credibility will be shot and you’ll only be as reliable as Kellyanne Conway. You better get used to people rolling their eyes at you.

Now Republicans have to make a choice. Do they continue to support Donald Trump out of fear from his supporters, or do they get a spine and put country over party? You know? Do their jobs.

On Tuesday afternoon The New York Times reported that James Comey wrote a memo after one of his meetings with Trump. In this memo the former FBI director claims that Trump asked him to kill the agency’s investigation into Michael Flynn. Presidents aren’t supposed to do that. Even Donald Trump.

This came a day after The Washington Post reported that Trump revealed classified information to the Russians. The Times and Post have been very competitive with their investigative journalism since Trump came into office. These two newspapers are doing the strongest journalism in the nation at this time and it’s paying off as both their circulations are increasing. I have a digital subscription to both and I’m proud to support real journalism. Your crazy uncle refers to it as “fake news.” The fact that I have subscriptions and they’re the go-to sources for information is why you see links to them so often here.

The Comey memo is bad news for Trump and it might be the strongest hit to his administration yet. He didn’t even send a flunky out to ruin their reputation by debunking it. They only sent a statement and by this point, a White House denial has about as much currency as Confederate money.

Trump was warned about Michael Flynn by acting-Attorney General Sally Yates. Trump fired Yates. Eighteen days after being warned, he fires Flynn. The day after he fires Flynn he has Comey in the Oval Office.

During the meeting Trump told everyone else in the office to leave the room, including Vice President Mike Pence and Attorney General Jeff Sessions. He asked Comey for his loyalty, as though he’s a tin-pot dictator and the United States isn’t a democracy. He then complained to Comey about leaks, which have been coming from the White House, and asked about jailing reporters who publish leaked information. So much for that Constitution thing. He then said to Comey “I hope you can see your way clear to letting this go, to letting Flynn go. He is a good guy. I hope you can let this go.” Trump wanted Comey to drop the FBI’s investigation and let it go.

Comey did not let it go. He ramped up the investigation by asking for more funds. The day after that he was fired by Trump. His spokespeople said the investigation did not weigh into the decision to fire Comey. Trump threw them under the bus a day later by telling Lester Holt that the investigation was on his mind when he fired Comey.

This is bad for Trump. Even Jason Chaffetz, the Republican who loves Benghazi hearings, wants to see the memo. Chaffetz chairs the House Oversight Committee. There will be subpoenas.

Even a few Republicans are talking impeachment. It may be too soon for that as there’s very fine parsing over defining obstruction of justice. But this trail leads to Trump firing people, stating he wanted the investigation to end, and then asking Comey to drop it, and then firing Comey.  This trail may wind all the way to a trial in the United States Senate.

Trump has to hope for two things. That Republicans will continue to live in fear of him and that people believe his word over Comey’s. Ha!

There’s been a lot of criticism of James Comey but none of that has been about his honesty. Trump’s honesty is not questioned. He would have to have some first. Trump is a pathological liar. In Trump’s first 100 days he told 492 false or misleading claims. In other words, lies. He employs people to lie. Trump is less honest than a professional baseball player on steroids.

Trump lies. He’s dishonest. He’s corrupt. He’s a buffoonish-man-baby. His mouth is taking him down and everyone who continues to support him and their reputations along with it.

Did you not get that memo?

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Firing Comey


cjones05152017

How bad has it become that the Nixon Library doesn’t want their guy compared to Donald Trump?

The library tweeted out that Nixon never fired a director of the FBI and used the hashtag “Not Nixonian.” Usually presidents are avoiding being compared to Nixon and Watergate, not the other way around.

The official reasoning for Director James Comey’s firing is that it’s based upon the recommendation of Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein. Rosenstein faulted Comey’s handling of Hillary Clinton’s emails when he sent letters to Congress last July, and again last October eleven days before the election.

While Rosenstein’s concern may be completely sincere, Trump is not. Trump celebrated Comey’s release of details of the Clinton investigation. He shouted it from the rooftops during his campaign and said “He brought back his reputation,” and “It took a lot of guts.” His only fault with Comey was that he wasn’t bringing charges against Clinton. So don’t tell me that Trump cares about due process in regards to Hillary Clinton. If you believe that then I will sell you a hamburger my dog made with his butt.

Democrats were no fan of James Comey. Many thought he should have been fired during the Obama administration. Not for investigations, but for his handling of the Clinton information. Firing a man who is investigating your campaign doesn’t pass the smell test.

When acting Attorney General Sally Yates warned Trump about National Security Adviser Michael Flynn, it took Trump 18 days to fire him. He only fired Flynn when the Post got wind of it, and continues to defend the guy and express resentment he was made to fire him. Instead of firing Flynn immediately, he fired Yates. Later he fired U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara whose jurisdiction covered Trump Tower and was reportedly looking into foreign banks with ties to Trump and stock deals made by Trump’s Health and Human Services Secretary, Tom Price. Now he has fired the man who heads the department investigating his campaign’s collusion with the Russian government.

The timing is suspicious. He fired Comey the day after his administration was embarrassed by Yates’s Senate Hearing. He fired Comey while he was on the west coast which makes you wonder who has access to his files. Tomorrow, Trump is meeting with Russia’s foreign minister. I’m sure they’re interested in how their investment is doing. Trump even mentioned the investigation in his letter notifying Comey of his firing. I’m sure tomorrow it’ll be the header photo on his Twitter page. Nothing suspicious here, folks. Move along.

Trump said he lost confidence in Comey. How are we supposed to have confidence in Trump, or who he chooses to replace Comey? Does anyone, other than Trump suck-ups, trust that the new director will be fully independent and do what’s in the nation’s best interest, not Trump’s? This man once thought Michael Flynn should be his National Security Adviser. With that “terrific” judgement, who will he think would be a great head of the FBI? Giuliani?

Comey was not fired because of his handling of the Clinton investigation. He was fired for investigating Trump. The New York Times Editorial Board writes “Mr. Comey was fired because he was leading an active investigation that could bring down a president.”

We are all living in Watergate. It’s time for a Special Counsel to investigate the Trump team because the cover-up has begun. This should be non-partisan and Republicans should stop being sycophants and lapdogs and join with Democrats and do what’s best for the nation, not the party or cult of personality.

Anyone who defends Trump’s handling of this is not a patriot. The Resistance should not be just a liberal or Democratic Party movement. It should be a movement to save our Democracy. We can disagree on basically everything in the world but we should all align against corruption.

I’m waiting to see which Republicans will step up to be on the correct side of history.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

Outrageous Distractions


cjones03232017

Before FBI director James Comey’s hearing before Congress, Donald Trump decided to start tweeting about his Russia connections.

He tweeted from his personal account, @RealDonaldTrump, that the Russia story was “fake” news. James Clapper and others stated that there is no evidence POTUS colluded with Russia. It’s a fake story the Democrats are pushing as an excuse for running a terrible campaign. The real story are the leaks.

During Comey’s testimony Trump switched over to the official POTUS account to give a live play-by-play coverage of the hearings. He tweeted that Comey said there’s no evidence of collusion between Russia and Trump Campaign and that Russia did not influence the electoral process.

Of course none of his tweets were accurate at all. What? Donald Trump would tell a lie?

Comey stated that there’s no evidence that President Obama had Trump Tower wiretapped. He also stated that the FBI is indeed investigating for cooperation between Russia and the Trump campaign. Comey could not state whether or not Russia influenced the election.

As it turns out, the FBI has been investigating the Trump campaign since July. For some reason weeks before the election they felt the need to only reveal they were investigating Hillary Clinton. They didn’t say anything about investigating Trump.

How did Trump deal with all this? He did what any normal person would do which was to hop on a plane to Kentucky and bitch about Colin Kaepernick.

You remember the brouhaha over Kaepernick, the quarterback for the San Francisco 49ers? He wouldn’t stand for the pledge of allegiance in protest of the United States continuing to be a system of racism. Trump stated that he likes people who stand for the Pledge.

Seeing that he likes people who stand for the Pledge but he doesn’t like American veterans who were captured, how would he feel toward a POW who stands for the Pledge?

And why the hell is Trump starting his reelection campaign within the first two months of his presidency? Should other candidates start announcing? Did Putin tell him to do this?

It’s funny that Donald Trump screamed loud and proud that he loves Wikileaks during the campaign (the first campaign). The GOP loved James Comey when he revealed he was investigating Clinton. Now the GOP wants to investigate leaks and they’re pretty upset with Comey.

Trump has had the worst start to his presidency than any other before him, except maybe Lincoln and that’s just because half the country seceded before he took office (his tenure didn’t end so hot either). Trump is no Lincoln. While Lincoln managed a war and freed the slaves, Trump’s only talent is distractions and deflections. I’m very interested in what his next one will be.

“Outrageous Distractions” should be a name for a punk rock band. It shouldn’t be the official policy for a sitting president.

Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. Your support contributes to my work and continued existence. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Want a signed copy of this cartoon? Donate at least $50 and I’ll ship it to you. Make sure to mention in the note with your donation which cartoon you want along with the mailing address you need it shipped to. If it’s a gift, make sure to mention the recipient’s name so I can make it out to them.

The Perpetrator


cjones01142017

If don’t believe misinformation, lies, and fake news contributed to Hillary Clinton losing the presidential election, go talk to a Trump voter. The fact the public viewed Trump as more honest than Hillary Clinton is proof the disinformation campaign was effective.

I don’t believe there was one contributing factor that handed the presidency of the United States of America to a narcissistic, racist, immature, charity-robbing, scam-university miser, illiterate, vagina-groping, politician-bribing, Putin-loving, fascist reality show host with a bad comb-over and an oddly-orange spray tan. Political analysts and historians (with future historians believing the electorate consisted of a lot of crack heads) will forever debate the 2016 election, but it was thrown by the combination of Russian hacking, Wikileaks, fake news, paid trolls, and finally James Comey, the director of the FBI.

During the election Comey issued a statement on Hillary Clinton saying she wouldn’t be charged for using a private server for her State department emails, but that she was a horrible, sneaky, manipulative person, which is a bad thing if you are a female. Days before the election he issued a letter saying the bureau was taking another look because there were emails from her on the family computer used by Anthony Weiner and Clinton aide Huma Abedin. A few days later after the damage was done he returned to tell us “never mind. False alarm.”

Last week during a Congressional hearing Comey while asked whether the agency was investigating links between the Trump campaign and Russia Comey said “we don’t comment on pending investigations.” He should have said “we don’t comment on investigations involving Republicans.”

Trump went on to win the election because storing emails on a private server is a much worse offense than infidelity, multiple bankruptcies, selling tacky ties made in China, stealing from a charity to buy portraits of yourself, watching teenage girls disrobe, assaulting women, not paying taxes for over two decades, jilting private contractors, bribing politicians, insulting veterans and Gold Star families, conspiring with Russians, or publicly lusting after your daughter. But grrrrrr, that server. I’m so angry about that server yet nobody can actually tell you anything about it. Oh and Benghazi. You don’t have to know anything about Benghazi. You just have to say “Benghazi.” It’s like saying “Beetlejuice” three times.” Just say “Benghazi Benghazi Benghazi” and tinfoil stock goes up three points.

Now the Justice department is investigating the FBI’s actions in the Clinton investigation.

No matter how professional Comey explains himself while wearing a poker face many have the impression that he tampered with the election. That’s totally understandable because he tampered with the election. Comey came to your house party and he peed in your punch bowl. Thing is, most of your guest saw him do it and they still drank the punch. It was tangy.

James Comey dived into the election and did everything he could to destroy Hillary Clinton’s pursuit of the presidency. If you can believe the Benghazi lies, or any Republican lies (invading Texas, birtherism, pizza parlor child-sex-slaves, etc), you can believe Comey and Putin manipulated the election. It wasn’t the Chinese or New Jersey fat guys.

The State department’s probe into Comey is a start, but the acting Attorney General, Loretta Lynch, needs to appoint a Special Counsel to investigate him while also looking into the relationship of Trump and Russia. This needs to be done before Trump’s elfish, racist maniac Jeff Sessions takes over at the Justice department.

As you can see from this cartoon, Comey’s not any better at caricatures than I am.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, etc.. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Thanking Red States


cjones12192016

In his continuing campaign to bring the nation together Donald Trump’s “victory tour” is only visiting states that voted for him. Screw those Hillary-lovin’ blue states. Of course during this tour he’s failed to thank the red state that supported him most, Russia.

A lot of Trump supporters ask why would Vladimir Putin want a Trump presidency in the first place? Perhaps he prefers the short-fingered vulgarian because while Putin stomps all over Aleppo, Trump is too busy meeting with Kanye and tweeting out insults at Vanity Fair for publishing a bad review of the Trump Grill.

I’m sure the Russian connection is just a figment of liberals’ imagination. Trump should ignore it and focus on the Vanity Fair review of his crappy restaurant. After all, They only gave one star to the Borscht.

Donald Trump’s claim that Russia is not behind the hacking of the Democratic National Committee’s and John Podesta’s emails falls a little flat. The man publicly asked Russia to hack into the Clinton campaign. Sure enough, they hacked into the Clinton campaign. They then released the contents through Wikileaks and Trump then used those same contents on the campaign trail. Even Trump supporters should be able to put those pieces together.

Trump spent years beating the drum of birtherism. He claimed he sent investigators to Hawaii to prove President Obama was born in Kenya. He made talk show appearances to be the loud shouting voice of birtherism. He claimed the president’s birth certificate was a fake. He never had one shred of evidence, clue, or anything meaningful to believe in birtherism, but he espoused it anyway. Today the CIA and the FBI are telling him that Russia hacked our election and he refuses to believe it. The man trusts Infowars and Breitbart but our intelligence agencies are probably just repeating conspiracy theories. Trump tells us he has the best brain. He needs to send investigators to find that unless its existence is a hoax also.

We are living in scary times when our president is more willing to believe conspiracy theories than facts presented by the CIA. It’s scary that so many Republicans give Putin a higher approval rating than our president. It’s frightening and galling that they continue to refute the truth of the Russia hack and continue to claim they’re patriots.

Fascists need cheerleaders too.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, etc.. The starving cartoonist appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Mall Rats


cjones11082016

First person to leave a comment about a little girl getting a big wiener is banned for life.

I had two ideas on Jim Comey. One was on his hit on Clinton’s campaign but then I thought that aspect wouldn’t be important after Tuesday. His negligence and fumbling will remain an issue so I went in that direction. I don’t think it matters who becomes president. Jim Comey’s career at the FBI doesn’t have a bright future. He’s managed to anger both presidential campaigns.

I had to do a lot of Googling for images while drawing this cartoon. I haven’t been inside a mall in years. I think the last time I went was when my album came out and I couldn’t talk my drummer out of buying ridiculous $200 Ray-Bans. He did get a lot of compliments that day for his Mohawk.

I have never liked mall food court food. Fast food is normally bad but food court fast food is the suck. Panda Express is an insult to China, Sbarro is an offense to Italy, and Orange Julius is an insult to Donald Trump.

Reminder: I am live blogging the election tomorrow night. If you follow me on social media you know I’m prone to making a lot of snarky posts. Tomorrow expect me to spend the entire night drawing those. We’ll start around 7:00-ish  and go until whenever. Just refresh the page all night.

You know you want to want to do it. Between me and Wolf Blitzer who would you rather spend the night with?

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!