FBI

FBI Complicity


Cjones07212021

People, stupid ones…mostly stupid men, always ask why women don’t report sexual abuse more often. The reason they don’t isn’t because they fear they won’t be believed. The reason is because they probably won’t be believed. Let’s take the case of Larry Nassar.

Larry Nassar was a doctor for U.S.A. Gymnastics and a professor at Michigan State University. Under the guise of medical treatment, Nassar abused his patients. He has admitted to only ten when the number may be as high as 332. More than 150 federal and state lawsuits have since been filed against Nassar, Michigan State University, the US Olympic Committee, USA Gymnastics, and the Twistars Gymnastics Club.

Rachael Denhollander, a lawyer and former gymnast, was the first to publicly accuse Nassar of sexual assault. She assumed Nassar was abusing other women because he had worked with the national team for four years before abusing her, and she knew how abusers worked. She said, “When I came forward, I fully expected multiple levels of botched investigations and cover-ups because that’s what survivors are up against.” She was right.

There is a new report by the Justice Department’s Inspector General that says for a year after being alerted to Nassar’s abuse, the FBI ignored it.

Denhollander said, “This is what survivors are up against. And they constantly get asked the question, ‘Why don’t survivors report?’ This is why.”

The report, citing civil court documents, said 70 or more young athletes had been sexually abused by Nassar between July 2015, when U.S.A. Gymnastics first reported allegations against Nassar to the FBI’s Indianapolis field office, and August 2016, when the Michigan State University Police Department received a separate complaint. One of the victims during the time the FBI sat on the report was eight years old. The makes the FBI complicit with Nassar’s sexual assaults.

Nassar is sitting in prison after combined sentences to over 140 years. He shouldn’t be the only one sitting in prison on this case.

Did you know it’s a crime to lie to the FBI? But maybe it’s not a crime for the FBI to lie to the FBI.

The IG report says officials in the Indianapolis field office failed to respond to the allegations “with the utmost seriousness and urgency that they deserved and required” and the investigation did not proceed until after a September 2016 report by The Indianapolis Star detailed Nassar’s abuse. So, what was going on for a year? Why did the FBI only start taking it seriously after the public was informed? If a newspaper had never investigated the accusations of sexual assault at USA Gymnastics and Michigan State University, would the FBI had ever investigated it?

W. Jay Abbott, the special agent in charge of the Indianapolis field office, was inquiring about job openings at…wait for it…the U.S. Olympic Committee, even while questioning them about the the case, he was asking about jobs with the Olympic organization. He even applied for one. USA Gymnastics was complicit and covering up the sexual assaults, and the guy in charge of the investigation was asking them for a job.

When asked about this by his superiors, Abbott lied. He also lied repeatedly to the Inspector General when asked about the investigation.

Nassar spoke with the president and chief executive of USA Gymnastics about potential job opportunities with U.S.O.C , even as the two discussed the allegations against Nassar. Abbott later applied for a job at the U.S.O.C., but twice lied to the inspector general about seeking that job.

Since he lied and violated FBI policy by applying for jobs with people he was questioning during an investigation, surely Abbott was charged, right? Wrong. Once again, men are protecting men who were protecting men.

Abbott’s lawyer issued a statement saying, “Mr. Abbott thanks the law enforcement officers and prosecutors who brought Larry Nassar to justice. Mr. Abbott hopes the courageous victims of Nassar’s horrible crime find peace.” What bullshit. If Abbott hadn’t been busted covering up the assaults and sitting on the investigation, then Nassar would never have been prosecuted. Nobody would have found any peace. Abbott thanking law enforcement and prosecutors for sending Nassar to prison is like Dr. Frankenstein thanking the pitchfork and torch-wielding angry villagers for killing his monster. It’d be like Donald Trump thanking human rights activists for reuniting families he separated at the border.

W. Jay Abbott is complicit with the rape of women and girls by Larry Nassar. While he was sitting on a case and asking about jobs so he could take them while receiving his FBI pension, Nassar was continuing to rape and assault, possibly over 100 girls and women, including an eight year old. Abbott should be charged and have his pension stripped from him. Maybe that will help the victims find the peace Abbott is hoping for them. Abbott couldn’t be more complicit if was physically holding the women down while Nassar sexually assaulted them.

The FBI sat on the Nassar case and they’re doing it again by refusing to charge and prosecute Abbott. There will be a Senate investigation over this and one of the questions will be, “Why isn’t anyone at the FBI being prosecuted for this?”

The reason there’s a need for the #MeToo movement, “We Believe You,” and the Pussyhat Project is because so many people refuse to even listen to victims, less enough believe them. And it’s because of men like Jay Abbott in powerful positions protecting rapists like Lawrence Nassar in powerful positions that women don’t report assaults more often.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Republican Rabbit Holes


Cjones06262021

Never mind the fact there are no facts to the latest stupid bullshit coming out of the GOP, but in their latest propaganda to remove blame from their cult leader and themselves, Republicans new culprit responsible for the attack on the United States Capitol complex is….the Federal Bureau of Investigations.

Upon first hearing this, I thought it was the type of stuff coming from the Qanon crowd who make up silly crazy shit like Jewish space lasers, Hugo Chavez voting machines, George Soros’ migrant caravans, Satanic baby-eating pedophiles working for Hillary, Trump won, Ted Cruz (ew) is a human and not some amalgamated-lizard-human type thing, etc. Shit like that. But it’s actually coming from people in positions where they should be more responsible.

It started with the right-wing website, Revolver News. No, I never heard of them before either, probably because they publish shit like this. But, it was quickly picked up by Tucker Carlson, which was then picked up by Republicans in Congress who official entered the conspiracy theory into the Congressional Record.

To refrain from using the word “shit” one more time in today’s blog, we’ll just say it’s all bull-hockey, which I think means “bullshit.” Aw, crap. Anyway…

Revolver is not a real news site. Of course, Tucker Carlson isn’t a real journalist and those Republicans in Congress pushing conspiracy theories aren’t real public servants. Revolver News has also published vaccine horror stories, an article that First Lady Jill Biden has talked to Joe in a “bitchy fashion,” and another claiming Biden’s dog, Champ, faked his death to infiltrate Oath Keepers. OK, I might have made one of those up.

This new false flag comes after other Republican false flags concerning the attack on the Capitol have failed. False flags like it was Antifa, Black Lives Matter, or even Democrats. It’s funny that Trump supporters celebrated the attack while simultaneously blaming other people.

This new belief is based on court records that mention “unindicted co-conspirators.” Several indictments against Capitol rioters who are accused of planning the attack with extremist groups include references to unindicted co-conspirators. The Revolver article claimed these co-conspirators could actually be FBI informants or undercover agents who infiltrated the groups, played a leading role in planning the attack, and stormed the Capitol.

The one thing that really pisses me off is that this fucknut right-wing website had to name itself after The Beatles’ very best album, Revolver. It’s when George truly blossomed as a song writer, Goddamn you, Revolver News!

The FBI may have infiltrated groups like Oath Keepers, Proud Boys, and Qanon. I hope they have. But that doesn’t mean they staged the attack on the Capitol.

Ross Garber, a Tulane University law professor and former CNN legal analyst, said, “This theory makes the erroneous assumption that unindicted co-conspirators are government agents. Federal agents acting within the scope of their duties are never considered unindicted co-conspirators because by definition they aren’t conspiring with the alleged bad guys.”

What he’s saying is, Tucker Carlson and Republican members of Congress don’t understand how shit works.

Tucker spent 12 minutes talking about this conspiracy theory in a segment that attracted over three million viewers. He even interviewed the editor of Revolver, Darren Beattie, who used to be a Trump speech writer until he got caught attending a conference with white nationalists.

Sidebar time: Remember when Tucker asked, “What is ‘white supremacy?” and played dumb time and time again that his show is the number one show and most favorit-o of white supremacists? Yeah, and then he interviews a white supremacists whose arguments he shares and promotes. Sidebar over.

On his show, Tucker said, without any proof, “FBI operatives were organizing the attack on the Capitol on January 6. It turns out that this ‘white supremacist insurrection’ was…again, by the government’s own admission in these documents…was organized at least in part by government agents.”

No, Tucker, you racists-loving racist. The government did NOT admit that. Does Tucker know how to comprehend anything?

Also, did you notice how Tucker tried to take the blame off “white supremacists” again? Why is it so important to these people to defend racists? If it’s not Donald Trump saying there were “good people” marching with tiki-torch Nazis, it’s Tucker trying to take blame off white nationalists for a bloody coup attempt. What is “white supremacy”? You got a mirror, don’t you, Tucker?

But you know, if they really want to go down this rabbit hole, then let’s go down this rabbit hole. Let’s have an independent commission to investigate this. You know that thing the Democrats in Congress wanted, then gave the Republicans everything they demanded before they could for it but still voted against? Yeah, let’s have one of those.

You would think if Tucker really wanted to get to the bottom of this and find out who was really to blame for the Capitol attack, he’d use his show to call for an independent commission to investigate the attack.

Of course, he doesn’t want to do that. Why? Because we know who attacked the Capitol. We know who tried to overturn a democratically-held election. We know who engaged in a bloody coup attempt. We know who tried to install Donald Trump as a dictator.

But what Tucker and Republicans are really afraid of is that an independent investigation may reveal names of people in Congress. In fact, the FBI has questioned defendants about their communications, connections, and coordination with members of Congress.

Here’s a fun read: In the Fourteenth Amendment, Section three, it says, “No Person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof.”

In case you’re a Republican, that means people like Ted Cruz (ew) and Josh Hawley (a horse called and he wants his face back), who supported the insurrectionists, can’t be in the Senate. That means Lauren Boebert, who tweeted locations of members of Congress during the attack, can’t be in the House. There are many more members of Congress who “gave aid and comfort” to the enemies of the United States of America.

It’s not the FBI who conspired to overturn the government. It was Republicans. Do you know why Republicans are so resistant to call the insurrection an “insurrection?” Because it’s their insurrection. It failed. Now, they’re afraid of being caught.

The attack on the Capitol was a terrorist attack against our nation. It wasn’t just against our government but also our democracy. It was an attack on our values which Republicans don’t share anymore. These terrorists were white nationalists. They were racists. They were Fox News viewers. They were Tucker fans. They were Donald Trump supporters.

Members of the FBI are not co-conspirators. That distinction belongs to Donald Trump and Tucker Carlson. Donald and Tucker are the true enemies of the United States. Also, whoever wrote that Kars4Kids jingle.

Honestly, I only know two phones numbers, Kars4Kids and J.G. Wentworth.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which usually go for $45.00 each, signed. Another order will be placed soon. You may pre-order if you want. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Searching For Borat


CNN05022021

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

I had several ideas involving Rudy and Borat last week and this is what I went with for CNN. But I may want to do a Borat cartoon for my clients just because it’s too much fun. So, you have been warned.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have Three copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Rudy Raided


Cjones05012021

Someone posted on the internet yesterday, “First they came for Rudy and I did nothing for I was laughing my ass off too hard.”

Someone else claimed since Merrick Garland is head of the Justice Department now, it’s fascism because this is his revenge for Donald Trump stealing his Supreme Court seat after President Obama nominated him. No. It’s not fascism. It’s karma.

Rudy spent months rummaging around Ukraine looking for dirt on Joe Biden and his son, Hunter. He never found any but that didn’t stop him from making up a lot of shit. He even claimed to have found Hunter’s laptop; nothing came of that either.

Beyond his dealings and lying with Ukraine to help Donald Trump steal an election by gaining dirt on the opponent he feared most, Rudy conducted a huge campaign of lies election after the opponent Trump feared most kicked his ass.

Rudy claimed the election was stolen. He produced eyewitnesses more insane than he is. He provided affidavits from people stating they heard someone heard someone else might have witnessed something. He held press a conference in a parking lost of a landscaping firm called “Four Seasons” because he confused it for the hotel with the same name. The parking lot was next to a dildo store. During the press conference, his hair dye started running. During a hearing before a state legislative committee, he got the farts.

Rudy, who was once called “America’s mayor,” has become America’s joke.

After Trump and other surrogates claimed he never paid off porn stars, or at least didn’t know about it, Rudy went on Hannity, who had also been claiming there had been no porn star payoffs, and informed the world there had been porn star payoffs and the money was “funneled.” Typically when someone uses the word “funneled,” unless they’re making a cake, they’re doing something corrupt.

A long time ago, Rudy was respected. Before he was mayor of New York City, he was an Associate Attorney General and then the United States Attorney for the Southern District of New York. Yesterday morning, FBI agents from the Southern District of New York came a knocking on Rudy’s door, and not to talk about old times.

It’s a big deal when any attorney gets raided by the FBI. It’s an even bigger deal for a president’s (sic) attorney to be raided by the FBI. But with Donald Trump, this is his second attorney to get raided by the FBI. But being someone’s attorney isn’t a license to be a partner in crime.

What was Rudy doing in Ukraine? Was he making money off the nation while engaging in election meddling? Was he representing Ukraine without registering as a foreign lobbyist? Was he there instigating more terrorists attacks or finding more cousins to marry? The FBI is trying to find out. How can anything be corrupt while working with goons named Lev and Igor? Now, Rudy has been rolled over by Lev and Igor who will soon be followed by Boris and Natasha.

The FBI raided Rudy’s Madison Avenue apartment and his Park Avenue office and reportedly took electronic devices. Rudy isn’t good with electronic devices. This is a guy who has butt-dialed reporters before engaging into a conversation about the Bidens, Bahrain, and needing cash.

Olivia Nuzzi, a reporter for New York Magazine, once wrote that during a meeting with Giuliani, he had three cell phones, and despite being a cyber security consultant, didn’t understand how to use any of them. She wrote, “Two of the devices were unlocked, their screens revealing open tabs and a barrage of banner notifications as they knocked into each other and reacted to Giuliani’s grip.”

“He accidentally activated Siri, who said she didn’t understand his command. ‘She never understands me,’ he said. He sighed and poked at the device, attempting to quiet her.”

And at the end of the meeting, he forgot to take one of the phones with him. Rudy learning figuring out how to swipe left would be like your grandfather figuring out TikTok.

If there are any files, texts, or call history on Rudy’s phones that provides evidence of corruption, do you think Rudy knew how to delete them or was even aware he should? If you’re a person who engaged in some sketchy dealings with Rudy and you had multiple conversations, calls, and texts with the guy, you have every right in the world to be worried.

Golly, I’m trying to think of who Rudy may have been calling on these devices the FBI seized yesterday.

Rudy denied ever talking to Donald Trump about receiving a preemptive pardon before he left the White House. Whether they actually talked about it or not (they did), you can bet your ass Donald Trump is wishing he had given one to Rudy. Trump gave pardons to other goons to keep them quiet. If he had given one to Rudy, the FBI wouldn’t have been at his house and office yesterday. Now, he’s in danger of Rudy talking. Hell, Rudy spills the beans when not making a deal.

For all we know, the FBI might even find new stuff they had no idea was going on. There are so many questions.

Will Rudy be charged with any crimes? Will Trump be implicated by Rudy’s stupidity? Will Trump be charged? Will Rudy roll over on Trump? Will Rudy and Trump both flee the country for a Moscow penthouse or maybe a villa in Pyongyang? How many times did Rudy fart during the raid? Will the FBI follow a trail of hair dye from Rudy to Trump?

Whether connected to Rudy or not, how much longer until Donald Trump is charged with a crime?

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have Three copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Rudy Colludy


cjones10232020

Rudy is still at it. Despite the arguments during Donald Trump’s impeachment hearings that everything was on the up-and-up with their asking Ukraine for election help, Rudy is still mining that nation for fools gold.

Now, Rudy has acquired a laptop he claims belongs to Hunter Biden. He took it to The New York Post with a shady story no other news outlet would accept. This story didn’t even land on Fox News first. Hell, even the National Enquirer didn’t go for it.

Basically, there’s an email in the laptop supposedly between Hunter Biden and an official from Burisma, the Ukrainian energy company Hunter worked for, that claims a meeting was held between him and then-Vice President Joe Biden in 2015. Yet, there is no evidence or public records of any such meeting. A vice-president’s schedule is usually on a public record. Yet, for some stupid reason, the FBI is still investigating it. Maybe because Donald Trump is screaming for his political opponent to be arrested, even though he can’t specify any crimes.

The reporter who wrote the story refused to have his name attached to it. Other journalists at the Post have protested their publication’s running of a story that doesn’t meet journalistic ethic requirements…and this is The New York Post.

The back story is: An owner of a computer repair shop in Delaware claims the laptop was dropped off by Hunter Biden, but his eyesight is poor so he’s not sure Hunter dropped it off. It could have been the Cookie Monster for all he knows. The computer was water damaged and for some reason, there’s no story about Hunter or anyone returning to retrieve the computer. Then, the owner saw the email and contacted Rudy Giuliani.

There’s a lot that smells here. The owner of the shop went through the private emails on the hard drive? The owner of the shop gave the hard drive or computer to be used politically? And, the owner doesn’t know who his customer is? If you live in Delaware, find out where this computer repair shop is and NEVER EVER EVER EVER give them your business.

Also, Hunter is a rich dude. Typically, if a laptop messes up or is seriously damaged, you’d just trash it, even way back in 2015. I’m a poor dude and I have three useless laptops in my closet. The only reason a guy like Hunter Biden would take a laptop in to be repaired would be because there’s something important on there he needs, and it wouldn’t be emails because you can just get those off whichever server you’re using. But, that can’t be the case because he never returned to pick it up. The story about dropping it off at a repair shop doesn’t make sense.

It doesn’t make sense The New York Post ran with it. The only story the press should run with this is that the guy we used to call “America’s mayor” and who is a former federal prosecutor, is now pushing bogus crazy uncle Qanon-type conspiracy theories. What has Rudy Colludy done now? Rudy’s even saying that America needs to know this Hunter Biden laptop story, even if it’s not true.

Hey, America needs to know that Rudy Giuliani married his second cousin, whether it’s true or not. Spoiler alert: It’s true.

Is this how Rudy used to prosecute cases? Your Honor, we don’t know who did it, who owns the laptop, if there was a meeting, and if there was, what it was about, and we don’t have any reliable witnesses…but we think there was somebody who did something bad and Joe Biden is connected to it somehow…I have a feeling about these sorts of things, also…I need a DNA test on some demon sperm.

It doesn’t make sense the FBI is investigating the story. Are they going to investigate chemtrails next? Maybe the FBI should look into the Qanon theory about cannibalistic pedophiliac Democrats worshipping Satan.

It doesn’t make sense Rudy hasn’t been arrested…or the computer shop owner. Rudy is running around with stolen property. Now, there are reports he’s taking it to a local police department in Delaware which also doesn’t make sense if the FBI is already on it. Also, why doesn’t that police department arrest Rudy as soon as he shows up with stolen property? And Rudy can’t say he’s holding onto it for evidence because Rudy is no authority. He’s a private citizen…who’s insane.

Rudy isn’t just on Trump’s leash. He’s on Putin’s. America’s mayor is now Putin’s poodle.

What else doesn’t make sense is that Jeffrey Toobin story… Yeah, that’s just weird. Who does that?

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first. But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

If Biden Wins


cjones08102020

You would think Donald Trump is talking out of his ass and making up wild bullshit out of desperation from losing to Joe Biden, except Donald Trump always talks out of his ass and makes up wild bullshit.

Donald Trump said if Biden wins, he’ll, “Take away your guns, take away your Second Amendment. No religion, no anything. Hurt the Bible. Hurt God. He’s against God. He’s against guns. He’s against energy, our kind of energy.”

He also claimed Biden will get rid of cops and fracking. The fracking thing might be the only thing close to being true. Why didn’t Trump include grandmas, baseball, apple pie, and puppies?

Joe Biden has based his entire career on his faith. It’s something he’s talked about again and again. He talked about how his faith helped him get through the loss of his first wife, daughter, and son. When Pope Francis visited the United States in 2015, Joe Biden met him on the tarmac, went with him to Mass at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, and accompanied the Pope to Philadelphia. He called the Pope, “the single most popular figure in the world.”

During the 2016 presidential campaign, Russians meddlers spread lies that Pope Francis endorsed Trump. Donald Trump never knocked those claims down.

When Donald Trump talks about religion, he says he has never asked for forgiveness and when he has been to church, that’s where you eat your “little crackers and drink your little wine.”

The last time Donald Trump went to a church, he had the military teargas peaceful protesters so he could walk to it from the White House, stand outside the church on a Monday afternoon, hold “a” Bible upside down(when asked if it was his, he said it was “a Bible”), all for a photo-op. Then he walked back to the White House. No statements. No prayers. Nothing but a photo which was made possible by Attorney General William Barr and Secretary of Defense Mark Esper, who later said he regretted it.

Religious leader and hater of zipping up his pants, Jerry Falwell Jr. is a big Trump fan and thinks the coronavirus is an evil plot to destroy Trump. What was in that glass of “black water?”

Evangelicals love Donald Trump. Many believe he was sent by God. Donald Trump believes he was sent by God. Donald Trump has claimed he’s the “Chosen One.” The Republican Party has turned into a cult that treats Trumpism as a religion. There is nothing to believe in but Trump. Christians who support Donald Trump are not Christians.

A Christian would take offense at Donald Trump using a church for a photo-op. A Christian would take offense at Donald Trump saying he doesn’t need forgiveness. A Christian wouldn’t support a man who brags about “grabbing them by the pussy.” A Christian wouldn’t support a grifter like Donald Trump who steals from charities to purchase paintings of himself. A Christian would not support a man like Donald Trump who is the king of vanity and can’t stop praising himself. A Christian would not support a man like Donald Trump who mocks the handicapped and puts children into jails. A Christian would not support a man who claims his opponent hates the Bible and will hurt God. A Christian would reject a man who claims he’s the “Chosen One.” A Christian would not support a man who lies. A Christian would not support Mr. Two Corinthians.

A real Christian would support removing Donald Trump from the Oval Office.

Joe Biden hurt God? A Christian would know that’s impossible. Donald Trump is no Christian.

If you claim you are a Christian and you support Donald Trump, do us all a favor and blow it out your ass.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Department Of Conspiracies


cjones04192019

Russia helped Donald Trump win the presidency. They created troll farms and bombed social media with fake stories to promote Trump. They bought ads to help Trump. They hacked the servers of the Democratic National Committee and the Clinton Campaign. They contacted the Trump campaign. They sent representatives to Trump Tower to meet with Trump’s son, son-in-law and campaign manager. The son-in-law attempted to create a backchannel with Russia to avoid detection from American intelligence. At least sixteen people in the Trump campaign had contact with Russia. One Trump aide boasted to an Australian diplomat that Russia had dirt on Hillary Clinton. One of Trump’s foreign policy advisers, Carter Page, had boasted about being an informal adviser to the Kremlin. Carter Page traveled to Russia and met with government officials during the campaign and reported it back to the Trump team. While pursuing a warrant on Page, a federal judge concluded that Page was knowingly engaging in clandestine intelligence for the Russian government. The FBI acquired a FISA warrant to carry out electronic surveillance on Carter Page, a suspected Russia spy.

The Republican position on all of this is, how dare the FBI investigate a possible spy and threat to the United States. The GOP has expressed more concern for the rights of a suspected spy than for national security.

Since the election, the Trump administration hasn’t done anything to protect the U.S. from another attack by Russia. Donald Trump has spent the majority of his time denying Russia meddled in the election at all. Trump has accused the Clinton campaign of colluding with Russia because they hired a former MI6 agent to investigate Trump and interviewed Russians in the process. For some reason, that’s collusion while hosting Russians in your campaign HQ is not.

For the past two years, Trump has accused the FBI of attacking him and attempting a coup. He fired the director and other high ranking officials with long respectable track records in law enforcement. The Republican Party has engaged in smearing the FBI while being unable to actually pinpoint anything done illegally. All they’ve managed to do is prove that all warrants were acquired properly and within the law.

The only people who parrot Trump’s conspiracy talking points are Republican lickspittles, the idiots at Fox News, and shitweasels on social media. Now, add the Attorney General to that list.

Attorney General William Bar was quick to claim the Mueller Report cleared Trump, a position he put in writing in advertising himself for the job. He was also Attorney General during the George H.W. Bush administration and helped cover up Iran/Contra and recommended pardons for those involved. During last week’s testimony before Congress, he claimed there was definitely spying on the Trump campaign, parroting Donald’s talking points. Trump publicly had a joygasm.

My cartoon for CNN was a joke about checking the box on your tax returns if you wanted some of your refund to help pay for Trump’s lawyers fighting to hide his tax returns. In reality, with William Barr as the Attorney General, you are paying for Trump’s lawyer to protect him. Barr is just as ridiculous as Lindsey Graham, Devin Nunes, Jim Jordan, and all the other elected Republicans who have spent the past two years putting the cult of Trump before our nation. Barr may as well start investigating all of Trump’s stupid conspiracy theories like Obama’s birthplace, New Jersey Muslims celebrating 9/11, the Swedish terror attack, and whose voice is that really on the Access Hollywood tape? He couldn’t ruin his credibility any more than he already has.

Barr is engaging in a coverup, which is exactly what Trump wanted from his Attorney General. Part of that coverup is a deflection which is what this fake investigation is all about. The FBI did not spy on the Trump campaign. They spied on an individual with the Trump campaign. It’s not the FBI’s fault that Trump hires Russian spies. Neither the Democrats or the FBI selected these people. Trump chose them.

It’s reported that Trump asked within the White House, “Where’s my Roy Cohn?” a lawyer who helped Joseph McCarthy engage in investigating suspected communists and a mentor in sleaze to Donald Trump. Trump wanted a Roy Cohn in the Justice Department to sleaze up the place in protecting him.

Barr doesn’t have any evidence that supports his spying claim, yet he’ll mimic stupid talking points as part of his coverup to protect Donald Trump.

Someday, another criminal in elected office is going to ask, “Where’s my William Barr?”

 

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

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Burn Your Notes


cjones01192019

According to the dictionary, a cult is a system of religious veneration and devotion directed toward a particular figure or object and a misplaced or excessive admiration for a particular person or thing. It’s a cult of personality surrounding a leader. It’s less about policy and more about adoration. It’s also less about facts and members of a cult will deny reality, truth, and perceive any criticism of their leader as an attack. North Korea is an entire nation in a cult. In the United States, Trump defenders are now sycophants, and they are in denial of reality. Trump defenders are a cult.

A conservative cartooning colleague of mine posted on social media today, that it’s hard to be friends with liberals when they think you’re a racist or a member of a cult. My answer to him is, if you’re supporting Trump then you might be a racist, you’re definitely in a cult, and I don’t want to be your friend. No friend request has been sent. He can get over himself.

You have to surrender objectivity to support Trump and claim that Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation and the newly reported FBI inquiry into whether Trump is acting to advance Russia’s interests and is a national security risk are all attacks by a “deep state.”

The fault for an investigation into Trump belongs to Trump. While sycophants ignore Trump’s actions that advance Russia’s interest, our justice system can not.

You can’t ignore that Trump called for Russia to hack into his opponent’s email.

You can’t ignore that Russians met with the Trump campaign in Trump Tower, their campaign headquarters. You can’t ignore that Trump issued a denial that was a lie about Russian adoptions. We initially thought the president wrote the denial for his son, Donald Trump Jr, but now we learn that Vladimir Putin may be the author. Hours before the denial was issued, Trump sat down with Putin, with only Russia’s interpreter present, and talked about, wait for it, Russian adoptions.

You can’t ignore that Trump has worked aggressively to dismantle NATO, which delights Russia. You can’t ignore that there are new reports that Trump discussed pulling the U.S. out of NATO, telling officials that he doesn’t see the point of the organization.

You can’t ignore that Trump thought Russia cooperating with our FBI to investigate Russian meddling into our election was a “generous offer,” and not more obstruction.

You can’t ignore that Trump spent over a year denying Russia meddled into our election and believed Putin’s denial over his own intelligence agencies. You can’t ignore that Trump refused to call out Putin at their Helsinki summit, or at any point in his presidency.

You can’t ignore that Trump said he fired Comey to get rid of the Russia investigation, and bragged about it to Russians in the Oval Office, with only the Russian media present.

You can’t ignore that when Trump met with Putin in Helsinki, no American aides were present, which is highly unusual for an American president. It’s unusual as in; no president has ever done that.

Now, we have something else we can’t ignore. After Trump’s visit with Putin in Hamburg at the 2017 G20, Trump tried to conceal his talks with Putin from even the senior-most members of his administration, and even reportedly seized the interpreter’s notes after one of his meetings. The second time he met with Putin in Hamburg was unscheduled without any Americans present, which is where he claims they talked about Russian adoptions.

This brings us back to other huge facts we can’t ignore. Trump offered Putin a free penthouse suite in his Trump Tower project, which never came to fruition (and by keeping it hidden, gave Putin leverage on him). Trump’s largest lender is Deutsche Bank, which many believe is financed by Russia. And finally, Russia meddled in the election to elect Donald Trump.

While talking to one of his favorite sycophants on Trump TV, er, Fox News, Trump said being asked if he was working for Russia is the most insulting question ever, without answering the question. He later did answer with an angry denial. But he also denied knowing about paying off porn stars and a host of other things in the past that later turned out to be true.

Trump is a liar and a traitor. He has worked actively to advance the interests of Russia and Vladimir Putin. The only thing we’re not entirely sure of is if he’s a useful idiot or a willful idiot.

If you still support Donald Trump and defend him, I have to ask what kind of idiot are you?

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Lawyering Up


cjones01162019

For the past two years, Trump sycophants have been barking “what evidence is there that Trump colluded with Russia”? It’s as if Robert Mueller is supposed to call each and every one of them directly each time he discovers something new. Never mind that there is evidence that Trump worked with Russia, such as calling Russia out to hack his opponent on the campaign trail, reading Wikileaks out loud at Trump rallies, and having Russians visiting his campaign headquarters to meet his son, son-in-law, and campaign manager. But after this week, the Sycophants should be having a harder time asking their stupid question. The mountain of evidence just got higher.

Sycophants aren’t the only ones who will struggle with their talking point. Donald Trump himself will have a harder time saying “no collusion” now that we know his campaign manager and current prisoner of the federal government Paul Manafort was sharing internal campaign polling data with Konstantin Kilimnik, a Russian national with suspected ties to Russian intelligence and who has been indicted by the Special Counsel’s office. Kilimnik formerly worked for Manafort’s consulting firm. Manafort had also discussed a Ukrainian peace plan, which would lift sanctions on Russia, with Kilimnik, who is believed to be hiding in Moscow at this time. Manafort, deep in debt to very dangerous pro-Russian oligarchs, was working for the Trump campaign without pay only because he’s such a nice guy.

Why was Manafort sharing polling data with a Russian national who has ties to Russian intelligence? There have been questions since the election about how Russian hackers knew to target specific areas and people, like Wisconsinites who didn’t like Hillary Clinton but would never vote for Trump. Trump beat Clinton by around 80,000 votes in Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania, a total lower than candidate Jill Stein’s. Russian hackers promoted Stein’s candidacy in those states. How did they know to do that?

Now, we have learned that the FBI has been investigating Donald Trump which is a big deal. The FBI doesn’t normally investigate a president, especially into if he was secretly working to benefit Russia against American interest.

The FBI, much like anyone with eyes, ears, and their head not currently up their own ass, was suspicious of Trump’s attitude toward Russia. They were holding off on an investigation until he fired FBI Director James Comey and told NBC’s Lester Holt that he fired Comey to relieve the stress of the Russia investigation. He told the same thing to the Russian ambassador and foreign minister.

Counterintelligence investigators had to consider whether the president’s own actions constituted a possible threat to national security. Agents also sought to determine whether Trump was knowingly working for Russia or had unwittingly fallen under Moscow’s influence.

If Trump had fired Comey to stop the Russia investigation, the act would have been a national security issue because it would have hurt the bureau’s effort to learn how Moscow interfered in the 2016 election and whether any Americans were involved. That’s what they call obstruction. Donald Trump is a national security threat.

Trump recently added seventeen lawyers to his defense team. What’s more shocking than the FBI investigating a president is that one of the lawyers is Not Natalia Veselnitskaya. That probably would have looked too weird.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Fake Investigation


cjones10092018

The Federal Bureau of Investigations did about as thorough of a job investigating sexual allegations against SCOTUS nominee Brett Kavanaugh as O.J. Simpson did in his search for the “real killers.”

Originally, Donald Trump said he wouldn’t ask the FBI to extend its background investigation on Kavanaugh, as it wasn’t what they do. Republicans echoed that nonsense. When asked if he would call for an FBI investigation, Kavanaugh said, “I like beer.”

Retiring senator Jeff Flake flaked on voting to confirm unless there was an investigation, so the White House authorized one, but limited its scope. Trump claimed he wasn’t limiting the FBI’s search while limiting their search. They gave the FBI a week, and they only took five days. You could actually keep video rentals out longer than that, back when there were video rentals.

Republicans didn’t want an investigation as they were afraid something new would be found. They don’t want to find any nastiness until Kavanaugh is on the bench. After looking at the report, that didn’t contain interviews with the accuser, or the accused, or a polygraph from Kavanaugh, the Republicans described it as a “very thorough investigation.”

Those who were interviewed gave additional names to the FBI, which went ignored. Several people contacted the FBI claiming they had corroborating information on Kavanaugh, but they too were ignored. It’s like the hunt was conducted by those Finding Bigfoot geeks, who claim they’re experts at finding Bigfoots, yet they’ve never found one. But, even they would have taken longer than five days. In fact, you could call the FBI and report you saw Bigfoot and aliens and probably get a faster response than if you were calling about Kavanaugh.

But, we didn’t need the investigation to know Kavanaugh doesn’t belong on the Supreme Court.

More than 2,400 law professors are opposed to Kavanaugh’s confirmation. Former Justice John Paul Stevens is opposed to the confirmation. A majority of Americans are opposed.

Other than being a suspected sexual assaulter with a drinking problem, there are several reasons Kavanaugh should not be confirmed.

The first is a reason we keep forgetting. Donald Trump is being investigated, thankfully by real cops, for colluding with Russia and other crimes to gain the presidency. A fraudulent president shouldn’t be shaping the Supreme Court for the next forty years.

Kavanaugh is not a consensus candidate. If you have to struggle to find 50 votes for confirmation, then you should give up. Find someone who can get the support of at least 60 Senators. Yes. Even in this day of tribal politics, you can find a nominee with bipartisan support. They’re out there. But, this Senate knew Trump would only nominate d-bags and the worst from the judicial system to place on the court, which is what the GOP wants. So, they changed the rules so that only 50 votes, not 60, are required to place a person on the Supreme Court for the rest of his life.

Kavanaugh doesn’t have the temperament. He displayed that at his last hearing, crying, shouting, and throwing questions back at senators when he wasn’t dodging or refusing to answer them. He’s a partisan hack, having worked in the Ken Starr investigation, which was an actual witch hunt.

Speaking of which, if a president can be impeached for lying about something that wasn’t a crime, then a SCOTUS nominee shouldn’t be confirmed for lying during his confirmation hearings. Kavanaugh hasn’t just lied about Devil’s Triangle, the Ralph Club, FFFF, or boofing. He lied about torture during the Bush administration and receiving stolen documents. We deserve a justice that can be trusted, not a perjurer.

He engaged in partisan conspiracy theories, the likes peddled by Alex Jones and Rush Limbaugh, during his last hearing. He claimed people bitter about Trump’s victory and those wanting revenge for the Clintons were out to get him. He said “what comes around goes around,” which is not something you want to hear from a guy headed to the Supreme Court. All that was missing was a “bwahahahahaha” and wringing his hands together. That’s probably coming after he’s confirmed.

Realizing he came off as a partisan hack, Kavanaugh wrote a column which appeared in The Wall Street Journal, which is owned by Rupert Murdoch. Good job, Brett, I mean “Bart.” Let’s prove you’re not a partisan by writing for Murdoch’s paper and appearing on his network. He didn’t apologize but wrote that he shouldn’t have said the things he said during that hearing, and he promises to be impartial and fair. But, those weren’t spontaneous comments. He wrote them down. He was prepared to say them. He thought beforehand that it was a great idea to say them. The only thing his advisers edited out was, “bwahahahahaha.”

The Senate needs to vote no on Kavanaugh. I don’t know why they’re insistent on dying on the hill for this guy. There are plenty of other right-wing assholes to choose from that will please their base, and who probably aren’t alcoholic rapists.

Probably.

Be Complicit
What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.