Live Blog Election Night 2016


Refresh the page all night long for updates.

Election day is here. Did you vote? I haven’t yet. Will do so soon. Tonight my exclusive brand of snarky, smart ass humor will be on display all night long with very rough and quickly-drawn cartoons along with commentary. I’ll also update and report some news in case you’re not glued to a TV. I even made a graphic header thingy for the blog so people can have a point of reference.

We’ll kick things off around 7:00, maybe sooner, maybe later. It depends on what happens. You just don’t know do you?

Final prediction: Hillary Clinton wins the election with 322 electoral votes. Trump has a conniption fit and his supporters go on TV to Baghdad Bob it and tell us he actually won. Gary Johnson finally discovers Aleppo. Kramer finally finds that chicken in his apartment. There are other things happening besides the presidential candidates so we’ll have lots of topics to cover.

You read it here, folks. And if you think Trump is going to actually win this election I’m really open to making some wagers.

See you soon.

And it begins!!! 5:00 PMliveblog1

5:42 PM. The only selfie I approve of. I’ll post another in four years.


8:01 PM.

States called for Trump: Indiana, South Carolina, Tennessee, West Virginia, Kentucky, Mississippi, Alabama, Oklahoma.

States called for Clinton: Illinois, Rhode Island, Vermont, Delaware.

8:23 PM

Marco Rubio just won re-election to the job he hates, said he wouldn’t run for again, then changed his mind.


8:49 PM

Republicans are projected to keep the House. Impeachment proceedings will begin tomorrow.


9:04 PM

Trump wins Louisiana, Alabama Texas, Wyoming, North Dakota, South Dakota, and Arkansas.

Clinton wins New York, Washington, D.C., Maryland, Massachusetts, New Jersey, and Connecticut.

9:29 PM.

The map is scaring Democrats. Florida is tight as expected with Trump in the lead and not sure if Democratic areas have enough votes for Clinton to over take it. North Carolina is kinda the same way. Very surprising is Virginia but we need to wait on the suburbs of D.C. Hillary still has her path to 270 without any of these, but it’s much harder.



10:00 PM

The Dow has dropped 500 points over fears of Trump winning. As I was drawing this Clinton pulled ahead in Virginia. I saw a friend on Facebook freaking out because of all the red states going for Trump. At this point Trump has yet to win something he wasn’t expected to win. Calm down, America.


10:34 PM.

A lot of people are freaking out. A lot of Democrats. Clinton may lose Florida and North Carolina but she just won Virginia and Colorado. Trump took Ohio. This election may be decided in Michigan. But it’s too early to freak out in you’re a Democrat.



As it stands now Clinton has 209 electoral votes. Trump has 187. He just won North Carolina which surprises me.


11:38 PM

OK. Now it’s getting scary. Trump has won Florida.


12:16 AM

Ugh….This can’t be happening. Are we really this stupid? Are we really handing our country to these people?


12:40 AM

This is not a joke. Other than the stock market crashing, and freezing, the website for Canada’s immigration has crashed.


1:21 AM

There are still eight states that haven’t been called yet, but it’s not looking good for Clinton. It’s not looking good for America or the world.


1:54 AM

Celebrate, Trumpers. I was flattered that a few chose to goad me as their first reaction to this “potential” Trump victory. I’m glad they think so much of me. They’re laughing as their country is burning.


2:36 AM

I’m still here. I haven’t fled the country yet.


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