covid

Lab Leak Theory

Some people may not get this cartoon, maybe even some who understand the issue. I hate to explain cartoons and I don’t write these blogs to explain my cartoons. If my cartoons don’t stand on their own, then they shouldn’t require help. But, I’m gonna blog about the issue anyway.

For the past three years, the theory that the coronavirus leaked out of a Wuhan laboratory, whether intentionally or accidentally, was mostly regarded as a conspiracy theory. Last week, FBI Director Christopher Wray (a Trump appointee) said the bureau believes Covid-19 “most likely” originated in a “Chinese government-controlled lab”. The Department of Energy has made the same assessment but with “low confidence.”

The theory that covid-19 leaked from a lab is popular with Republicans. Trump ordered an investigation, not into the cause of covid, but just to focus on the lab leak theory. It’s the belief that the virus leaked from a laboratory in the central Chinese city of Wuhan where the virus was first recorded and is 40 miles from the wet market where the first cluster of the virus emerged. The reason Republicans love the lab leak theory so much is that it allows them to pile on China and add to their outrage over TikTok and spy balloons.

China is not to be trusted with information and they haven’t been open with the investigations and studies of the virus. But I don’t believe China would inflict the world with a deadly virus intentionally. Honestly, we will never know for certain the origins of the virus, whether it came from a lab or occurred naturally and transferred from animals to humans (and Republicans).

The thing is, the leak theory is plausible but it doesn’t have a lot of support in the scientific community. The Department of Energy’s Office of Intelligence and Counterintelligence and the FBI are two of 18 government agencies that make up the intelligence community, which are under the umbrella of the Office of the Director of National Intelligence. They are the only two that’s grabbed onto the lab leak theory.

No new scientific evidence has been presented to support the lab leak theory. Is it plausible? Yes. Even Dr. Anthony Fauci says it’s plausible and should be investigated. But Republicans are using these reports as if they’re uncontested facts. Don’t listen to Republicans.

Remember, most Republicans don’t believe in climate change and believe life begins as soon as the pants are unzipped. Many believe in gay conversion therapy. One of the goons Ron DeSantis just appointed to a board that will try to direct Disney’s content believes people have been turned gay by chemicals in tap water. Republicans have used election lies to suppress voting rights which makes me believe they’ll use this information about covid to suppress something else. Republicans in Congress are already planning investigations into this. Expect more subpoenas for Dr. Anthony Fauci.

All the comments I’ve heard from Republicans about this leak have omitted the phrase, “low confidence.” Quite frankly, I have low confidence in Republicans.

Creative note: I drew most of this Thursday night, wanting to get a jump on Friday so I could spend most of the day on my CNN stuff. But come Friday morning, I thought of something else and did that. I really wasn’t sure about this cartoon but went ahead and finished it today. I wasn’t sure people would get it and sure enough, the very first comment it got on Twitter was, “Heh?”. Shit. Also, I don’t think any other liberal cartoonists have touched this subject.

Music note: I listened to The Beach Boys.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Advertisement

Wrong Protest

The protests in China are mostly against strict lockdowns due to Covid. These lockdowns are not the same as the “lockdowns” we had in the United States. The lockdowns in China led to people being burned alive inside a building because they were literally locked in.

Sure, we had “lockdowns” in schools, churches, and businesses being closed, but nobody was literally locked in. There were limitations placed on businesses, but most were not ordered not to do business or engage in commerce. In the U.S., 43 percent of businesses closed temporarily.

Complaining and protesting that you can’t do business is legitimate. You have a gripe. It sucked. None of us liked it and it’s not something we wanted to keep. Democrats did not want to keep the economy shut down and if you remember correctly, outside of being gaslighted, all the shutdowns started while Donald Trump was president (sic).

Most of us support the protests in China. Most of us support freedom. Republicans say they do, but they don’t. Republicans support Trump, Putin, and fascism. Several Republicans are tweeting out support for the protesters in China not because they’re protesting for freedom, but because Republicans think it’s a stick in the eye to the people in the USA who believe in science. At the same time, they’re silent over their presidential frontrunner “truthing” that we need to ditch the Constitution and install him as president.

Republicans protest and gripe about the economy being shut down, but they also protest against face masks and vaccines. Remember, at the start of Covid, they said, You can wear a face mask but don’t make wear them”. Now, they scream at people for wearing face masks even though it doesn’t affect them at all. My profile photos on Instagram and Truth Social are of me wearing a face mask, and goons are constantly commenting insults about that. I even got a “Let’s go Brandon” on a city bus. And their protests against the vaccines are based on conspiracy theories.

They’re not protesting vaccines or face masks in China. If you look at photos of the protests, you’ll notice that the majority of protesters are wearing face masks. Unlike Republicans, they don’t deny that Covid exists or is still a danger.

If you want to support the protesters in China, great. But at least understand what it’s about. It’s not about your political bullshit or conspiracy theories. In China, they’re protesting against oppression. If you’re a white Republican, nobody has oppressed you. You’re just a big pampered privileged baby.

Note: My 30-day Facebook suspension is over and I can now post my cartoons there again. Thanks to everyone who posted my cartoons in my absence. I saw all of them that tagged me. Thank you.

Music note: I listened to Foo Fighters.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Biden Covid

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday. 

This made me laugh along with my editors at CNN. I almost nearly drew it Friday morning for my newspaper clients, but then the Josh Hawley thing happened. Right as I was finishing my Hawley cartoon, my editor’s assistant at CNN emailed saying they wanted this one.

I was thinking about doing a cartoon for my clients on this issue, but quite frankly, I don’t think it’s much of an issue anymore. Biden seems to be recovering and it’s not like with Trump, who caught it after publicly defying CDC guidelines, downplaying the pandemic, and pushing bullshit medical advice like bleach and aquarium cleaner.

Music note: I listened to something but I don’t remember since this was drawn five days ago. Ha.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

DeDumbass Bully

Can Republicans take a day off from their race to the bottom?

We get the psycho troglodyte twins, Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene, heckling during the State of the Union on one day. And then in the same week, we get the governor of Florida, Ron DeSantis, bullying kids.

At a press event at the University of South Florida in an area where the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention still recommends indoor masking due to high COVID-19 risk, DeSantis bullied high school students for wearing face masks, calling it “political theater.” I think that’s a Rand Paul talking point.

As soon as DeSantis got to the stage to give his little speech, he turned to the students who were set up as props behind him and said, “You do not have to wear those masks. I mean, please take them off. Honestly, it’s not doing anything. We’ve got to stop with this COVID theater. So if you wanna wear it, fine, but this is ridiculous.”

A few of the students slowly removed their masks with a couple of them saying they only did so out of pressure from the governor. Some of the students left their masks on.

Remember when these goons were arguing that face masks should be a choice? People like DeSantis and Virginia’s new goon governor put in regulations banning public schools from enacting face-mask mandates. They argued that children wearing face masks should be a decision left to parents. But now, we see from Ron DeSantis that it should be a parental choice only when the parents decide on what he wants. If you choose for your children to wear a face mask, Ron DeSantis will bully them.

They used to whine about being forced to wear face masks but now, they’re bullying other people for wearing face masks. When they tell us something should be a choice, they’re just talking about it being their choice. Republicans believe in choice just as long as they’re the only ones choosing. They want to make all your choices for you.

One student said, “I was a little bit surprised at his tone,” and chose to leave his mask on because there were many unmasked people around and he was wary of getting COVID-19. The kid’s father later said that he’d advise Ron DeSantis to “stop bullying kids.”

The father also said, “I tell him it’s his choice, so he made that choice and the governor has no right to tell no kid or no one who they can or can’t wear a mask. He doesn’t have that right.” Didn’t DeSantis use to make that argument about mandates?

Now, Ron DeSantis is fundraising off it. He sent an email to supporters that said, “Predictably, the leftist propagandists in our media had a meltdown and called me a ‘bully’ for allowing children to breathe fresh air.” Predictably, a Republican bullies children then claim he’s the victim. Snowflakes.

Agriculture Commissioner Nikki Fried, a Democrat running against DeSantis for governor, tweeted, “Ron doesn’t realize it’s not about the masks, it’s about him being an asshole.”

Isn’t that the case with all Republicans now? It’s about being an asshole? For them, that’s the entire point. Which Republican can be the biggest asshole? And then, let’s run on it. Have you ever seen footage of a Trump rally where there’s an entire auditorium cheering on racism and chanting “send them back?”
Let’s bully students. Let’s bully teachers. Let’s bully minorities. Let’s bully the LGBTQ community.

In Florida, where they made it legal to run over Black Lives Matter protesters, there is a new bill that says educators “may not encourage discussion about sexual orientation or gender identity in primary grade levels or in a manner that is not age-appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students.” The bill doesn’t state at what age or grade is appropriate for these subjects but I’m guessing it’s never. What happens if an educator teaches gay black history? Will that teacher be shot at dawn or does Florida prefer gallows?

In Florida, it will soon be illegal for a teacher to tell a student they shouldn’t be ashamed for who they are.

There was a statewide student walkout on Thursday protesting this homophobic bigoted legislation and one student in Palm Coast was suspended for handing out pride flags. Apparently, you can’t protest fascism in Russia or Florida.

Don’t vote for bullies and assholes. That means don’t vote for Republicans.

Music Note: Today’s tooning tunes were off the Foo Fighter’s last great album, “Wasting Light.” After that, they kinda turned into the Fray.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

The SCOTUS Open

CjonesRGB01162022

In ruling that the Biden administration can’t force large businesses to enact vaccine mandates, the conservative majority of the United States Supreme Court argued that the coronavirus is not an “occupational work hazard.” Don’t worry if they’re wrong because every member of the Supreme Court is vaccinated, so they don’t have to deal with the coronavirus hazard at their workplace.

The mandate applied to companies with over 100 employees. It required all employees to be vaccinated or be tested every week. This would have affected over 82 million workers, which is two-thirds of the U.S. workforce. Now thanks to the Supreme Court, you can still be an employed gaslighting anti-vaxxer Fauci-hating fucknut.

The Biden administration estimated the rule would save our nation from over 250,000 hospitalizations.

This was an OSHA (Occupational Safety and Health Administration) designed rule, but the court doesn’t want OSHA to have any authority. They claim despite factories, meat-packing plants, grocery stores, distribution centers, etc, being super-spreader environments, covid is not an occupational hazard.

Previously, a three-judge panel of the sixth US Circuit Court of Appeals had decided the Osha rule was “an important step in curtailing the transmission of a deadly virus that has killed over 800,000 people in the United States, brought our healthcare system to its knees, and cost hundreds of thousands of workers their jobs.” This pandemic is an extreme event and the federal government should do everything it can to protect its citizens.

SCOTUS is afraid big government is overstepping its boundaries, but the Biden administration isn’t forcing people to be vaccinated. If anything, it hasn’t gone far enough. We need vaccine mandates for traveling on planes and trains. Hell, there should be a federal mandate for family get-togethers, maybe just to keep the creepy ranting uncles in their attics where they belong.

The majority on the nation’s highest court is ignoring that when you get COVID, it’s not just yours. It’s not a choice (which they also disagree with). This is a pandemic of the unvaccinated. You have very little control if you catch it or not. The court’s ruling acts as if the government is infringing upon people’s right to catch and spread covid. What will they rule against next? Free vaccinations, free N95 masks, and free testing?

The conservative majority on the court is also afraid allowing OSHA to regulate here would expand its authority without congressional approval. But, Section 2 of the Occupational Safety and Health Act of 1970 says “Congress declares it to be its purpose and policy, to assure so far as possible every working man and woman in the Nation safe and healthful working conditions [and] assure insofar as practicable that no employee will suffer diminished health, functional capacity, or life expectancy as a result of his work experience.” If you catch covid at work, that’s a work experience.

OSHA’s power to regulate here was literally approved by Congress.

So far, I’ve caught two things the majority had to invent to issue their ruling. The first is that the coronavirus is not an occupational hazard. The second is that OSHA doesn’t have congressional approval.

But, since OSHA does have congressional approval to regulate where there are occupational hazards, this ruling is bullshit.

The Supreme Court’s conservative majority had to worm and squirm to find some easily debunked crap to base their opinion on. Next, they’ll base their rulings on Facebook memes.

The Supreme Court did allow the Biden rule to stand on vaccine mandates for hospital workers. This is a good thing because their other ruling against vaccine mandates is really going to put more people into hospitals.

Music note: I listened to U2 while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Fauci Pummels Paul

CjonesRGB01142022

You would think something like an international pandemic would be the sort of thing that unites us across political lines. And it has…in every country on the planet except this one. Here in the United States, it’s been politicized by the Right to attack the people who are working to save us, and cast them as villains.

The Right has made medical professionals, teachers, scientists, and most of all, Dr. Anthony Fauci, the bad guys throughout all of this. Dr. Anthony Fauci is the chief medical adviser on the coronavirus and director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases. Republicans have accused him of everything from creating mandates to shutting down businesses to murdering Beagles to creating the virus. No one has been more vile and despicable with this than Rand Paul. Every time Dr. Fauci has to testify before the Senate Health, Education, Labor, and Pensions Committee.

In yesterday’s installment of Rand Paul’s lies and gaslighting, he accused Dr. Fauci of orchestrating a smear campaign against right-wing “academics” who opposed shutdown measures in 2020. This would be like Rand Paul laughing at Bozo the Clown’s hair. As it turns out, the emails Rand Paul was using to make his case only showed that Dr. Fauci sent colleagues a link to a Wired article debunking claims about reaching “herd immunity.”

Then, Dr. Fauci exposed Rand Paul for his attacks and raising campaign money off the pandemic.

Dr. Fauci said Rand Paul’s lies and attacks on him have endangered the lives of him and his family. Fauci pointed out the arrest of a California man in Iowa last month who police said was traveling to Washington with an AR-15 rifle and multiple magazines of ammunition. The man allegedly had a “hit list” including Fauci and several others, mostly Democratic politicians. Where do you think these people get this hatred?

A few months ago, I was in a bar on a late afternoon getting some street tacos when Dr. Fauci came on the television. The man sitting next to me started ranting about Dr. Fauci and told me the doctor was responsible for killing people and was a murderer. Yes, I called the man out, but more to the point, this gaslighting and villainization is dangerous. Most goons will be like that bar idiot, talking stupid shit he doesn’t even know anything about. But then there are the guys like the would-be assassin caught in Iowa. It’s not the first time someone was inspired by conspiracy theories to go to Washington, D.C. with a hit list. Hello? Remember Pizzagate? Do we not learn anything or do we just not care? Probably both.

Rand Paul doesn’t care if he endangers anybody’s life. This jerk roamed around the Capitol complex while waiting for the results of a COVID test. He risked infecting hundreds if not thousands of people.

Dr. Fauci brought photocopies of Rand Paul’s website and pointed out he was making money from his attacks on Fauci. The website contains a graphic saying “Fire Dr. Fauci” and Dr. Fauci pointed it, “a little box that says contribute here.”

Pointing out the details on the website, Fauci said to Rand Paul, “You can do $5, $10, $20, $100. So you are making a catastrophic epidemic for your political gain.”

Every time Fauci has to testify before this committee, Rand Paul uses it to raise his political profile with the MAGAt base. Most news outlets’ headlines on yesterday’s hearing focused on the real story, Fauci fighting back against Rand Paul. But Fox News’ headline says, “Rand Paul Rips Fauci.” Everything that goon in the taco bar knows about the coronavirus and Dr. Fauci that’s not GOP and Fox News bullshit, he learned from me.

Rand Paul responded saying it’s “disappointing for you to suggest that people who dare to question you are responsible somehow for violent threats.” Then, I’m not making this up, Rand Paul sent out another mass fundraising email with the headline, “Fauci is hysterical.”

Rand Paul said in a statement after the hearing that he was one of the lawmakers at the baseball practice in which Republican congressman Steve Scalise and others were shot in 2017. Reports showed the shooter was a Bernie fan, and Paul said, “I never once accused Senator Sanders of being responsible for the attack and I resent Fauci avoiding the question by ginning up the idea that his opponents are the cause of threats.” Except, Bernie Sanders never gaslighted or lied about Steve Scalise…if he’s ever said his name. Bernie Sanders never sent out mass fundraising emails containing debunked conspiracy theories accusing people of creating and weaponizing viruses. The Waterboy’s mama ginned up for more hate against a sport than Bernie Sanders ever has when she said, “Foosball is the devil.”

Also, the only person who said stuff that incited Rand Paul’s neighbor to kick his ass (true story) was Rand Paul. To be fair, if you lived next door to Rand Paul, you’d probably wanna kick his ass too.

Later in the hearing, Fauci was caught on his mic calling another Republican senator a “moron.”

Roger Marshall, a Republican senator from Kansas, cited a Forbes story reporting that Fauci is the highest-paid federal employee, earning $434,312 in 2020. Marshall told Dr. Fauci that he needed to disclose his personal finances to the public.

Fauci said, “I don’t understand why you’re asking me that question. “My financial disclosure is public knowledge and has been so for the last 37 years or so.”

Marshall claimed the “big tech giants” won’t let anyone see Fauci’s salary…even though the Forbes article is literally on the internet and came up on the first page of a Google search. There’s also an article in The Week, and another in the New York Post, and another on Yahoo, and another in the Daily Mail, and another in The Independent, etc, etc… Each of those articles were on the first page of my Google search. Despite all these articles, Senator Marshall said, “We’ll continue to look for it. Where would we find it?” Kansas has the internet, right?

Dr. Fauci told the Senator, “”All you have to do is ask for it. You’re so misinformed, it’s extraordinary.” And then, Dr. Fauci muttered, “What a moron. Jesus Christ.”

Marshall released a statement that calling him a “moron” didn’t change the facts about Fauci funding “gain-of-function.”
Yeah, calling Senator Roger Marshall a “moron” doesn’t change the fact that he is a moron.

If Senator Roger Marshall wants to get to the bottom of a public servant’s finances that were truly hidden, then he should have looked down the bench and questioned Rand Paul about his wife’s investment, $15,000, into the company that makes remdesivir, a drug made to treat COVID, and that they failed to report for a year and a half.
Marshall will probably never read that story because it’s on the internet.

And, they wonder why so many people want to assault them.

Music note: I didn’t listen to anything while drawing this one.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Urine Trouble

CjonesRGB01122022

The anti-vaxxers with the bogus cures are now promoting another bullshit treatment. But in this case, the bullshit is urine. Seriously.

Some of these idiots have ingested cleaning products made for fish tanks. Others on the advice of Donald Trump have shot bleach up their asses. Thousand upon thousands have taken medication that’s for livestock. Now, one of these hoaxers is telling us the cure is to drink urine. Wait. Not just any urine, I don’t think, but your own urine.

Christopher Key is an Alabama anti-vaxxer with an online cult following. He uses his website not just to rant against vaccines for the coronavirus, but to spread false information.

In the past, he told pharmacists that what they’re doing by giving out vaccinations are committing “crimes against humanity.” The same could be said for Key by spreading false information. Key said if the pharmacists “do not stand down immediately, then they could be executed.” He claims “they can be hung in the state.” Sure they can…and if they’re hung in Alabama, then they’re most likely hung in any other state they visit, but I’m not sure what that has to do with vaccinations.

Key went to a Missouri Walmart to harass people. Now I know there are Walmarts in Alabama, but he was invited by some fucknut crusade to a rally in Missouri.

Key has also sold deer antler spray for athletic injuries on his website. He’s also sold “concussion caps” to football players to avoid injuries. The caps are actually just beanies, which means he’s forcing football players to become hipsters. Ever see a guy wearing a beanie in August? That’s a hipster. It annoys me more than fuckers wearing face masks under their noses.

I saw a guy in Giant yesterday with his nose sticking out of his face mask. The dumbest part of this is that face masks are NOT required in Virginia. Why are people doing this when they don’t have to wear the face mask? It’s like putting the helmet on the back of your motorcycle. Look. There is it. We can all see it but it’s not where it’s going to help you.

Sorry. I digressed again.

Standing outside a Walmart, where we’ve all seen crazy people shouting at people, inanimate objects, and the sky, Christopher Key yelled at an employee, who was probably rounding up shopping carts, “If you allow one more shot in one more person’s body, you yourself will be executed in violation of the Nuremberg Code. We don’t want that to happen to any of you guys at all. We love you guys. We want to keep you safe.” Yeah, sure. Then he went to a Walgreens and a CVS to harass those employees. Seriously, if you’re going to protest anything at CVS, it’s them wanting your phone number to check you out. You don’t need my phone number to sell me a plunger. A plunger was the last thing I bought at a CVS, which was Christmas day, 2020.

And again, I digressed.

Key has also claimed that hospitals are putting people in comas and on ventilators just for having a common cold. At the Missouri event, the lunatic organizers used fog machines as part of their presentation and Key initially thought it was an anthrax outbreak.

In December, claiming he’s the “vaccine police,” Key threatened to go to Louisiana and arrest Governor John Bel Edwards for vaccinating children in the state.

Key said, “I am the vaccine police,” which has less legitimacy than when Beavis shouts, “I am Cornholio.”

He claimed, “We have shut down pharmacists. We have shut down boards of education. And we will be arresting the governor of Louisiana on February the 7th if he does not stand down and not vaccinate the children of Louisiana.” I’m going to tell Alexa to remind me to check on this on February 7. Maybe he’ll do it…if he’s not in jail. More on that in a minute. Key has been on a cross-country tour with a flamethrower to arrest other Democratic governors.

Do flamethrowers fall under gun laws? Is it legal to sell an insane person a flamethrower? It’s probably legal in Alabama.

Key said he would conduct the arrest “out of love,” because “they are trying to start a civil war” and “coming for our children.” Yeah, coming to save children who have fuck-head parents.

Key said the cure to the coronavirus is to drink your own urine. He brought us this revelation straight from jail, where most new medical breakthroughs are known to occur. Listen, Christopher, I don’t care if you like the toilet wine but drinking your own pee isn’t a cure except for maybe fresh breath. Opposite of Mentos, urine is the unfreshmaker.

So, why was Key in jail? He was arrested for trespassing at a Birmingham Whole Foods for refusing to leave because he wouldn’t wear a face mask. I know it’s shocking. There’s a Whole Foods in Alabama? In court, Keys told the poor bastard the court appointed to be his attorney, “I’m not insane.” Sure, he’s not insane, and did I mention the flamethrower?

Immediately after getting out of jail from the whole Whole Foods incident, he told his followers to drink their own urine.

I have some questions. For this pee cure to work, is it mandatory that the pee you drink must be your own? I mean, what if it’s a friend’s pee? Is it a DNA thing? If so, can you drink your sibling’s pee? What if the pee is from a Russian hooker? Can your pee be mixed with other people’s pee? If bullies give you a swirlie, can you count that as immunity? If it’s not your own pee, are you doing it wrong?

Key said, “The antidote that we have seen now, and we have tons and tons of research, is urine therapy.” Yeah, you need to be in therapy. He also said, “I know to a lot of you this sounds crazy, but guys, God’s given us everything we need.” Yes, God has given us our pee…and flamethrowers.

When reached for further comments, because we really need to hear more of this, he said “This vaccine is the worst bioweapon I have ever seen. I drink my own urine!”

I guarantee that the type of person who follows this advice will be sitting next to me the next time I’m on a bus.

Someone really needs to put the urine-drinking flamethrower guy, not into jail, but into an asylum. Don’t do it out of hate. Do it out of love.

Cheers!

Music note: I listened to Stone Temple Pilots while drawing today’s cartoon. I turned on the music when I started drawing the grass because when you do stuff like that takes a lot of patience, it helps to zone out. I got through the entire Core album while drawing the grass, and then I started on Purple.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Jerky Jock Tests

CjonesRGB01112022

It’s always disappointing to discover an athlete we’ve admired for years turns out to be a narcissistic condescending entitled asshole.

I used to admire Brett Favre. The odds were always against him in high school, college, and when he entered the NFL. He overcame all those odds, went to two Super Bowls, winning one. We love rooting for underdogs. Then near the end of his career, we watched him put himself before, not just his team, but the entire league while sending penis pics to women who did not want to receive penis pics (note: most, if not all, women NEVER want to receive penis pics). As a Quarterback, Brett Favre was amazing. As a human being, he’s a disappointment. While sending the penis pics, he was married with two daughters.

After he left the Packers, he was replaced by Aaron Rodgers who turned out to be a better quarterback than Brett Favre. He also seemed to be a better person. We liked him in those Allstate commercials with his teammate Clay Matthews. “I’m like a bird, I’ll only fly away.” He seemed like a guy with a $19 million-a-year salary you could relate to. Then after several years, we discover he’s an antivaxxer taking medical advice from Joe Rogan. We discovered the guy lied to his team about his vaccination status and was a total worm with his excuses. He didn’t just endanger his team’s chances of winning but also put his teammates’ health at risk.

It was almost like that time we learned Tom Brady was a Trumper, except we already hated Tom Brady. Seeing Tom Brady in Subway commercials would make me want to never eat at Subway if I was a person who ate Subway sandwiches.
To be honest, I did order from Subway a few weeks ago and instead of receiving the Italian sandwich I ordered, they sent me a whitebread microwave-bacon mayonnaise sandwich. No, there weren’t any tomatoes, just bacon and mayonnaise. I think there was one black olive on it. Subway’s response to the complaint was…there wasn’t a response. I suppose when you order from Subway, it’s a gamble. Screw you, Subway, and your five-dollar footlongs. You and Brett Favre with the so-called footlongs. You and Tom Brady deserve each other. I’m still really pissed off about that sandwich.

But I digress.

Kyrie Irving is another athlete who put himself before his team by refusing to be vaccinated. Kyrie plays for the Brooklyn Nets and New York City has a vaccine mandate for sporting events (in case you’re a Republican Brooklyn is a part of New York City).

Kyrie shared a post on Instagram stating “secret societies are administering vaccines in a plot to connect Black people to a master computer for a plan of Satan.” He also believes the Earth is flat. I’m not making that up. If there is a Satan, he’s not fucking with vaccines. He’s at Subway making bacon/mayo sandwiches on white bread.

At first, Kyrie refused to tell anyone if he was vaccinated or not. Then, he said he was unvaccinated because he was protesting people losing their jobs over refusals to be vaccinated, except nobody’s actually losing their jobs over vaccinations. Kyrie hasn’t lost his. And why do the antivaxxers always get wormy and quibble with their reasoning? Why? Because that’s the kind of people antivaxxers are.

Now, because the Nets are plagued with injuries and his teammates are overburdened by covering for him, Kyrie is being allowed to play on a limited basis. He was brought back with only 22 games left in the regular season and he can’t play home games or in Toronto, which is another city with vaccine mandates.

Novak Djokovic is the reigning Australian Open champion. He flew to Australia to defend his title without being vaccinated. The Australian Open cleared him to play and gave him a vaccination exemption, even though they required everyone else to be vaccinated. The Australian government disagreed and canceled his visa, which stuck him in a quarantined hotel with real immigrants who have real problems.

Djokovic argues he’s exempt from vaccinations because he had Covid in December….of 2020…maybe. He claims he tested positive on December 16, 2020, but on the day after (in case you’re a Republican, that would be the 17th), he was pictured at an awards ceremony for junior players…and he wasn’t wearing a mask. Djokovic believes catching COVID gives you eternal natural immunity. The simple fact that people have caught COVID more than once proves this as false. Do you know who else believes that bullshit? Rand Paul. Somebody get him one of those bacon/mayo sandwiches and beat his ass with it.

So basically Djokovic believes he can enter while unvaccinated into a country that requires vaccinations to enter. He believes he’s entitled to go maskless while he’s positive for COVID. He believes he’s so special, that he doesn’t have to wear a face mask and should be allowed to risk infecting others. Somebody put this asshole in a Subway commercial.

Now an Australian judge had decided poor Novak has been treated unfairly by the Australian government (what did they do? Force him to eat at Subway? Do Australian Subways have vegemite sandwiches?) and has restored his visa, opening a path for him to play in the Open. But, the immigration minister could still cancel his visa, which would lead to an automatic three-year ban on his entering the country.

Trusting Djokovic on vaccinations and immunity is like trusting Joe Rogan when he tells you to take horse medication, which Aaron Rodgers did. Djokovic also believes you change the makeup of water and food by using positive thoughts. I should have tried that on the bacon/mayo sandwich. “You’re an Italian BMT, damn you!” The imagining your food shit was a thing in Peter Pan. It might work in Neverland, but here in the real world, you still got a shit sandwich.

These athletes feel they are entitled and deserve better treatment than ordinary people. Some of them even demand special treatment their teammates don’t receive.

When a voter for the NFL’s Most Valuable Player award said he won’t be voting for Aaron Rodgers because of his vaccination controversy, Rodgers called the voter a “bum.” Wah.

The voter said that Aaron Rodgers is a “bad guy” and “the biggest jerk in the league.” I totally agree. An MVP doesn’t put himself before his team. Aaron Rodgers might be the best quarterback in the league this year, but he’s not an MVP.

And someone should force him to eat one of those bacon/mayonnaise sandwiches.

Music note: When I opened my music player, it was already on The Beatles, which I listened to while walking to get groceries Saturday. So I just stayed on The Beatles while coloring this.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Trump Boosters

CjonesRGB12282021

Happy Christmas eve, my dear readers.

While on tour with Bill O’Reilly (yes, that’s an actual thing), Donald Trump said he got a booster shot. He got booed…by his own cult. It was like he admitted he ate a salad.

Trump didn’t volunteer this information. O’Reilly nudged him to admit it. Now keep in mind, Donald Trump didn’t want anyone to know he got his first vaccine shot. While Presidents Biden, Obama, Bush, and Clinton all publicized their vaccinations, Donald Trump kept his a secret until it leaked out weeks after he had left the White House. And of course, Trump didn’t let his cult know he was being boosted either.

Trump is now trying to take credit for the vaccine and President Biden has given him some stating earlier this week, “Thanks to the prior administration and our scientific community, America is one of the first countries to get the vaccine.” By the way, Donald Trump never gave credit to President Obama for anything. He just took credit for half of Obama’s accomplishments while trying to destroy the rest.

Now Trump wants all the credit for the vaccines that his base despises, which is kinda weird. Trump told conservative gaslighting conspiracy theorist and token black friend Candace Owens, “I came up with a vaccine, with three vaccines. All are very, very good. Came up with three of them in less than nine months.”

I doubt Donald Trump can mix milk and cereal together successfully and needs assistance with his Fruity Pebbles. What Trump did was gaslight, deny, and politicize the virus. Donald Trump is directly responsible for hundreds of thousands of American deaths. What he wants credit for is his getting out of the way so the science community could create vaccines for the coronavirus.

But, at least Trump is sticking up for the vaccines now even though he’s against mandates. He even corrected Owens when she made comments about the vaccines not being effective. Shockingly, Trump said, “Well, no, the vaccine works. The ones that get very sick and go to the hospital are the ones that don’t take their vaccine. But it’s still their choice, and if you take the vaccine, you are protected.” He even said, “People aren’t dying when they take the vaccine.”

That’s nice, right? But let’s not forget his statements from 2020.

On January 22, 2020, he said, “We have it totally under control. It’s one person coming in from China. We have it under control. It’s going to be fine.” On January 21, 2021, the day Trump left office, there had been over 25 million cases in the United States.

On February 10, 2020, he said, “Looks like by April, you know, in theory, when it gets a little warmer, it miraculously goes away.” It’s December 24, 2021. It hasn’t gone away.

On February 26, 2020, he said, “When you have 15 people, and the 15 within a couple of days is going to be down to close to zero. That’s a pretty good job we’ve done.” There have been over 52 million cases by now. In case you’re a Republican, 52 million is more than 15.

On February 27, 2020, he said, “It’s going to disappear. One day, it’s like a miracle, it will disappear.” Again, it’s still here.

On February 28, 2020, he said, “Now the Democrats are politicizing the coronavirus. You know that, right? Coronavirus. They’re politicizing it.” Have you heard any good Dr. Fauci jokes lately?

On March 9, 2020, he said, “So last year, 37,000 Americans died from the common flu. It averages between 27,000 to 70,000 per year. Nothing is shut down, life and the economy go on. At this moment, there are 546 confirmed cases of coronavirus, with 22 deaths. Think about that!” There have been over 800,000 deaths from the coronavirus. In case you’re a Republican, 800,000 is more than 70,000.

Don’t give Donald Trump any credit for the vaccines or now when he occasionally says something that’s not a total bonkers lie. This is a man who didn’t just put himself before the nation, but before the lives of the people he took an oath to protect. His politicization of the virus, telling people to take aquarium cleaner over real medication, and campaigning against testing killed people. This guy once stood in the White House briefing room and talked about injecting disinfectant. This guy campaigned against the virus and CDC guidelines, then caught the virus because he ignored those guidelines, received privileged medical treatment, then lied about it and had his doctors lie about it. The man even tried to pass it on to his political opponent.

And now he’s on tour promoting himself and his “accomplishments” against the virus? Praise Trump? I have nothing but contempt for this person.

Donald Trump shouldn’t be given a platform to promote his bullshit. He should be given a prison cell.

Music note: Today’s tunes to toon to were Live (Throwing Copper, skip the singles) and Sheryl Crow.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Futbol, Covid, and Snails

CjonesRGB12012021

There is a new surge of COVID in Europe, and the new variant, Omnicron from South Africa, has been detected on the continent. Fortunately, western Europe has a high vaccination rate. Eastern Europe, well, it’s a lot like West Virginia, but with more teeth.

While there are new cases of COVID in western Europe, the death rate is low…at least for now. That’s because most people in western Europe are vaccinated. Vaccines are not a guarantee you won’t catch COVID but most cases are mild in people who have received them.

If the United States is hit by a new wave, or this new variant arrives and it’s as badass as we fear, we’re not going to do as well with it as western Europe has. Only about 62 percent of our nation is vaccinated, and that’s not enough. The take here is: Get vaccinated. I’m due for my booster this week.

Does the fact I’m vaccinated make me better than those who are not? Yes. Yes, it does.

There is no excuse not to be vaccinated in this nation. The availability is everywhere. Vaccines have been approved for children. It’s very effective against COVID. Also, it’s free.

A lot of stereotypes about nations are not entirely true. Not everyone in England walks around with a stick up their butt. Not everyone in Ireland is a drunk (right?). I’m sure not every Frenchman has a mistress or is a rude smelly snail eater. I’m pretty positive every girl in Switzerland doesn’t dress like the Swiss Miss, no matter how much you fantasize about it. Has everyone in Iceland slept with one of their cousins? Does everyone in Holland wear wooden shoes? Is every Italian male an ass pincher? Is everyone in Greece naked on a beach? And I’m sure not every European believes the United States is full of yokels who eat a ton of bacon each morning with an AR-15 strapped to their backs while being too stupid to get vaccinated against a virus that’s killed over 700,000 in this nation.

OK, maybe some stereotypes are true.

Note: Short blog today because I’m not really feeling it after receiving some devastating news about one of my best friends last night. More information on that later.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: