CNN Debate

Wanna Buy A Watch?


Did you watch the latest Republican debate? The final debate before Super Tuesday as every debate is the final debate before something. I did and it was a slobberknocker. Basically it was Ted and Marco versus The Donald. It couldn’t have been much worse than if Trump was caught between the Pope, Vicente Fox, and Mitt Romney.

First impression I got was how sad it was to see President George H.W. Bush and former First Lady Barbara at the debate after Jeb had dropped out. It’s like your parents going to your little league game after you were kicked off the team.

The high point of the debate that will be talked about Friday was when Marco Rubio stated that if Donald Trump hadn’t inherited $200 million, he’d be selling watches in Manhattan. That was a good one. It was so prepared that Marco is pretend selling broken Trump watches at his site. You don’t actually get a watch but you get the privilege of giving Marco $10.00. The remark was as prepared as the audience because Rubio’s people had planted screamers to react to everything Marco said. It was annoying. This was supposed to be a debate, not Beatlemania.

But Marco came out swinging at Trump. He attacked him for his fortune, his taxes, his hiring illegals, his fake university, his lawsuits, donating to Democrats and charities (Republicans are so terrible that donating to charitable causes will be used agaist you), his bankruptcies,, his lack of specifics, and I’m kinda surprised he didn’t squeeze a “your mama is so ugly” in there somewhere. He hit Trump on issues that aren’t new, some out there for over a decade. Someone discovered Google.

Cruz was more than happy to join the pile-on. The thing is, where was this before? Why did they wait until the tenth debate to go hard against Trump? Rubio has yet to win a primary or a caucus and he’s behind Trump by double digits in his home state of Florida. Cruz is barely leading Trump in his state of Texas and has a lead in Arkansas, but that’s it. Did they do a Christie and hurt Trump without helping themselves? Quite possible. If Rubio loses Florida, it’s over for him. If he wins Florida, which is over two weeks from now and several primaries away, and half the delegates are already gone…it’s still probably over. Rubio might actually working on Campaign 2020 at this point.

For Trump, who states he can shoot a guy and his supporters will still love him, will any attack hurt him? Plus, people may not really interpret anything that was said as it was mostly inaudible as all three guys were talking over each other most of the night. Trump’s defense against his rivals were that Cruz is a liar and a basketcase and Rubio suffers from meltdowns.

Oh yeah, John Kasich and Dr. Ben Carson were also on the stage. Kasich, who is NOT a moderate, is the most qualified and prepared for the presidency out of all these guys. Carson, desperate for time, begged for someone to attack him. Seriously.

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The 2006 film Idiocracy is about a future where mankind dumbs down. Society consists of nothing but stupid people. A man from our present is put into a deep sleep and wakes up in this future and he’s persecuted for being smart. Does that sound familiar? Not the waking up in the future part, but the part of being ridiculed for being intelligent.

In this fictional future quantity is placed above quality. Carl’s Jr sells Extra Big Ass Fries and Extra Big Ass Tacos. Entertainment includes an Oscar winning movie titled “Ass”, and that’s all it is. One ass.  The top television show features nothing but hits to the groin (Have you ever seen TruTV? They have shows that revolve around people injuring themselves). People get degrees at Costco (Trump University, anyone?).

Science is disregarded for commerce. A Gator Aid like drink is used to water crops and the government wonders why nothing is growing. Cities suffer massive landslides of garbage.

The film is set hundreds of years in the future but it seems we’re not that far off. We have elected officials that ignore science, even when nearly every scientist in the world tells them Climate Change is a problem. They watch cities and even nations (the Marshall Islands are disappearing) get ravaged by climate and they believe it doesn’t exist because it snows in Buffalo in January. The chairman of the Senate committee of Environment and Public Works is throwing snowballs on the Senate floor. In the movie they don’t want to put water on crops because water is what’s in the toilet.

Republicans refute Bill Nye the Science Guy because his title rhymes with his name and he wears a funny tie. They hate scientist Neil DeGrasse Tyson because he puts science over religion and they consider him a geek. In the film they say of the smart guy “he talks like a fag”.

The one area the future in this film doesn’t exhibit is mass racism, which is something today’s Republican party is inviting.

Today we have candidates who lie, and after being caught, defend the lie and their supporters still believe them. They pander to xenophobia and racists and then wonder why their party is full of so much hatred. The top candidates for the GOP nomination has zero to very little public office experience. The top candidate in the polls is running on a platform of replacing Obamacare with “something better.” Voters who don’t like Obama because he’s an elitist with a high opinion of himself love Donald Trump. People believe the answer to gun violence is more guns, which would be like fighting cancer by introducing more cancer. A town in North Carolina has rejected a solar farm because they believe it will “suck up all the sun’s energy.”

I don’t believe the Republican party is stupid. Not all of it anyway. I don’t think all of the candidates are unintelligent. But they are definitely selling policies to those who are. Fear, hate, and dumb solutions are top sellers. They are all in a contest for the stupid vote.

Maybe this cartoon is stupid. If so, it should be a big hit.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!


Carly Describes Another Video


People who suffer cognitive dissonance are hard to figure out. They believe stuff that’s not true, even after it’s proven and pointed out to them. They’re still all “uh-uh.”

They believe Obama is a coming for their guns, he’s gone on an apology tour, he’s Muslim and wasn’t born in America. You can’t convince them the United States is not invading Texas, Obamacare has not installed death panels, Sharia Law is not being implemented, Eric Clapton did not write I Shot The Sheriff.

Don’t get them started on Climate Change.

Over the past few months the big lie are the videos of Planned Parenthood, which supposedly proves Planned Parenthood is chopping up dead babies and selling them to make a profit.

Now Republicans want to defund PP, despite the fact that abortion only accounts for three percent of it’s services and that government funds do not pay for abortion.

Despite the videos proven to be heavily edited, deceptive and pushing a lie, conservatives are still promoting them and using them for their argument. They’re even using these as their basis to try to shut down the government, again.

During Wednesday’s debate candidate Carly Fiorina wowed everyone with her performance, and she did a good job. She lied but but she did so convincingly. She went into great detail to describe a fetus taken out of a womb, and while its legs were still kicking a PP worker talked discussed keeping the baby alive so they can harvest the brain.

Yeah, nothing like that is in any of the 12 plus hours of these videos. Yet, Carly doesn’t have a problem being a liar. It was even pointed out to her by journalists that this scene is not in any of the content. She insisted it is and continues with her argument. This is like trying to convince someone roosters don’t lay eggs.

Having an opinion is fine. But there’s a difference between opinion and fact. If you’re anti choice, that’s fine, but I wonder how strong is your belief in your cause if you can’t stick to the truth. You have a weak argument if you need lies to advance your agenda.

I understand. You don’t think it’s a lie. It’s been proven as a lie, but you still believe in the lie. You probably have a bigger problem than being a liar. You might be a lunatic.

Now another one of them is running for president.

Reagan’s Boots


I like and hate this cartoon. I like it because I believe in the message that Carly Fiorina did win the 2nd Republican debate. I hate it because Republicans are going to love it and use it to further cheer lead for Fiorina. While winning on style, Fiorina was full of crap. Also, just because she’s wearing Reagan’s boots, that’s not necessarily a good thing. I feel kinda dirty.

Fiorina competed on a stage with ten male candidates. Some of them very accomplished, successful and experienced for the presidency. She stood taller than the rest. She was firm and direct with her answers, even if they were ridiculous.

While she should be compared with the other candidates, it’s fair to also compare her to other female Republicans since so few have made an impact. She’s no Sarah Palin or Michele Bachmann because Carly Fiorina is not an idiot or a ridiculous person. Plus, Fiorina can articulate a complete sentence. The only thing Palin or Bachmann has over her is that they have held political office. You can’t really compare her to conservative commentator Ann Coulter as Coulter is just a horrible and nasty person in general. Fiorina carries herself with a little grace and class while Coulter is just a human garbage disposal of vitriol.

Let’s get back to the debate and Carly Fiorina:

I don’t like any of the Republican candidates. That said, Fiorina beat all of them which gives her two debate wins in a row. Of course she’s on stage with republicans so you have to take that into account. The other candidates who did a good job were Jeb Bush and Chris Christie.

The problem for Fiorina during the debate was when she defended her business record. Fiorina was CEO of Hewlett Packard and during her term their stock dropped 55% and she laid off 30,000 employees. It’s hard to sell yourself as a job creator when you fire 30,000 people. HP wanted to get rid of her so bad they felt it was worth $21 million to make it happen.

Fiorina won the debate on style. She didn’t win it on facts or for having plausible plans. She smacked down Trump and even made him shut up after he attempted to defuse his insults of her by saying she’s beautiful. She was solid on her knowledge of international issues and the Constitution. But she gave some bizarre answers.

To intimidate Russia and show Putin that a real Reaganesque leader was now in charge, Fiorina will rebuild the Sixth Fleet which is already huge. She’ll rebuild the missile defense plan in Poland which would probably be completed after Putin’s out of power. Plus, how many more warheads do we have to point at Putin to intimidate the guy? She wants to put more troops in Germany…where we already have over 40,000. That’s only 10,000 fewer than she laid off from HP.  Of course all this is red meat to war mongering Republicans. With all her attacks on Iran and wanting to continue an embargo of the country she failed to mention, or forgets, that HP probably violated the embargo by selling Iran computer parts.

She talked about Immigration Reform. All Republicans ignore the fact that President Obama has asked Congress to send him a reform package but they haven’t done anything in regards to immigration.

Her biggest applause line of the night: a riff on the Planned Parenthood tapes that set conservative Twitter afire. “I dare Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama to watch these tapes. Watch a fully formed fetus on the table, it’s heart beating, it’s legs kicking while someone says we have to keep it alive to harvest its brain.”

The only problem? Nothing like that happens in the Planned Parenthood tapes. As Sarah Kliff, who has watched all the tapes, wrote, “either Fiorina hasn’t watched the Planned Parenthood videos or she is knowingly misrepresenting the footage.”

She won’t be judged for telling a lie. She’s judged for telling Republicans what they want to hear and what they want to hear are lies. They’re willing to shut down the government over lies.

Fiorina was confronted after the debate on the fact the scene she depicted was not in any of the 12 plus hours of the tapes. She stated she didn’t misspeak, they’re in the tapes and she saw them and shame on Democrats blah blah blah. Just repeat the lie and the masses will eat it up. It’ll work for her.

Fiorina is going to be very formidable and there’s speculation that after her performance she’ll eat into the other candidates’ numbers, most likely Ben Carson’s support.

While we’re here let’s analyze a bit of the other candidates’ debate performances:

Lindsey Graham was at the “Kids Table” debate and he earned some high marks. Mostly he was self effacing and wants to increase drinking among politicians. The other three guys during that debate didn’t stand out and former Virginia governor Jim Gilmore wasn’t denied participating. We keep sending him out of the state to debate and they keep sending him back.

Chris Christie has been a footnote but last night might give him a boost. He directly challenged the other candidates and even smacked down Fiorina and Trump at the same time.

Marco Rubio came through with a solid performance. He may get a bit of a bump but more importantly he’s staving off disaster. He’s going to be a more serious candidate in the future. From what platform I’m not sure since he won’t be a U.S. senator anymore.

Donald Trump was a bit more low key than usual. Most of the audience was establishment Republicans and they’re not his crowd. He didn’t get any wild cheers or support from the audience. He disappeared during talks on foreign policy and even his cheap insults at Rand Paul were flat. Apparently he’s not physically attracted to Rand Paul. He didn’t hurt himself as much as Fiorina probably hurt him. He’s still the man on top.

Ted Cruz was his creepy self. Watching him made me wonder what the hell is wrong in Texas to put Grandpa Munster (without the charm) in the senate? Anybody? He talked about his background and his parents but failed to mention Canada. He also wants to put his wife on the $10 bill. But again, creepy. He also plugged a political cartoon which excited several of my colleagues until we realized the guy drawing those things isn’t a real cartoonist and actually draws talking points for right-wing think-tanks.

Jeb! was the adult in the room. He was as solid as Carly yet had a bit more personality and humor. He even had a little energy to him. He confronted Trump and even slapped hands with him. He improved from his first debate. He also said he smoked pot when he was a kid. His biggest gaffe was saying his brother protected America, totally forgetting September 11, the invading the wrong country, Katrina, Dick Cheney, etc. Maybe it was all that marijuana. Somebody buy the guy a bag of Rainbow Doritos.

Rand Paul did a really good job that will be totally meaningless. He’s an isolationist and this crowd really wants to nuke somebody. He battled Trump. Got insulted by Trump. He insulted Trump in a significant manner. None of this will matter in regards to his campaign. Paul is about done.

John Kasich was on the same stage as everyone else. That’s about it. I forgot he was there for most of the night.

Mike Huckabee was forgettable also. He further showed he doesn’t understand the Constitution. He’s Ted Cruz lite. All the bigotry with less creepiness.

I think Scott Walker fell off the stage. He was barely visible. Didn’t get much speaking time. Didn’t say anything significant. The Koches’ investment is him is as big of a business success as Fiorina’s time at HP.

Ben Carson is the biggest loser from the debate. He had momentum. He’s second in polls. He had an opportunity to increase his numbers and instead he put everyone to sleep. His only high point was schooling Trump in medicine. He also said we shouldn’t have attacked Afghanistan after 9/11 which is something even liberal Democrats supported.

They also asked each candidate to say which woman they would want on the $10.00 bill. Out of eleven Republicans they could only name four women who made an impact in America’s history. Four of them couldn’t even name one, instead saying they want their wife, mother or a non American.

The debate was three hours long which is too long. Screw the polls. They should split the next debate in two like they’re doing now, but pull names out of a hat. Maybe Trump can loan them one.  They can put an equal number of whoever’s left in the two debates. After two debates it’s a waste of time to continue wasting air time on a few of these candidates who don’t have a shot in Hell like Paul, Huckabee, Cruz, or Kasich.