Brittney Griner

B-Ball and Cannibal


It was bad enough that we are offering Victor Bout in exchange for basketball player Brittney Griner and accused spy Paul Whelan. But now, the Russians are asking for an assassin to be included in the deal, a convicted murderer who’s not even in United States custody.

Viktor Bout is a Russian arms dealer without the charm of Nicolas Cage who sold weapons to terrorists planning to attack the United States. He’s currently in U.S. custody serving 25 years after being convicted of conspiracy to kill U.S. citizens and officials, delivery of anti-aircraft missiles, and providing aid to a terrorist organization. I mean, damn. Even Donald Trump has only done two of those things.

I’m not sure about all the details with Paul Whelan as like the people holding him, the Russian Federal Security Service, Whelan has a long history of lying. But Brittney Griner is being held captive by Russia for possessing a little bit of hemp oil. What were the Russians afraid of? That she’d spread it around and Russian civilians would get the munchies? So, trading an innocent and harmless basketball player who’s never hurt anyone for a guy delivering anti-aircraft missiles with the intention to kill Americans is bullshit.

But now, the Russians want Vadim Krasikov, an assassin who murdered a Chechen fighter in Berlin in 2019. Krasikov was convicted in Germany. He’s not ours to give away.

What this means is that the Russians aren’t taking our offers of trading the arms dealer for Griner and Whelan seriously. They’re fucking with us.

Trades in professional sports will often include players from more than two teams. Usually, everyone gets some value…except the New Orleans Saints and Minnesota Vikings. Those teams always get fucked in deals. But then again, it was the Saints’ own stupidity that traded an entire draft for Ricky Williams with then head coach Mike Ditka announcing his willingness to do so two months before the draft, thus eroding any leverage he may have begun with (if you ever get an opportunity to play poker with Mike Ditka…DO IT!). It was the Vikings’ own stupidity that gave the Cowboys three Super Bowls in exchange for Herschel Walker, and this was before Herschel Walker was talking about our good air going to China with their bad air coming over here.

I just hope the Biden administration is smarter than the Ditka one. If not, we’re going to give Russia a bunch of murderers and terrorist arms dealers and all we’ll get in return will be a bunch of hot pockets and a Yugo.

I do believe President Biden is smarter than Mike Ditka. After all, Ditka’s a Trumper. You gotta be a moron or a white nationalist to be a Trumper. Biden is not a moron.

I just wish we could trade the equivalent of Brittney Griner for Brittney Griner. I mean, we have a lot of Russian hockey players. Can’t we just give one of those back to Russia? There’s a bunch of them making American dollars who’ve posed with Putin for photo-ops.

But then again, if Putin really wants a pro-Russian criminal who’s committed to destroying the United States, let’s go back to my original idea from last week. Let’s give him Donald Trump.

Music note: I listened to Men At Work.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Trading For Brittney


Why can’t we trade Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson to Russia for WNBA star Brittney Griner?

Brittney Griner was wrongly imprisoned. Even in a fascist oppressive state like Russia where the justice system is less consistent than Facebook’s algorithms, nobody should be sent to prison for possessing a little hemp oil. At the most, they should have given her a tiny fine. But what Russia is doing is holding Brittney, not as a prisoner, but as a hostage. They are using her as leverage to get something they want from the United States. This is a terrorist act. We are negotiating with terrorists. So, let’s give them some terrorists.

Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson have all supported terrorists. They’re great big fans of the white nationalist terrorist attack on our Capitol to overturn an election and make our nation more like Russia. They love Russia and fascism just as much as they love white nationalist terrorists.

There’s a pro-Trump goon on GoComics who always refers to me as “Comrade Clay” in an attempt to insult me, you know…because liberals are commies like Russia was back in the 80s, or some shit like that. But the people who have boners for Russia today aren’t liberals. They’re MAGAts. They love Putin. They love Russia. They love fascism. White nationalists see Russia as the last bastion of white purity.

These people love to tell us that if we don’t love America, then we should leave, yet they’re the ones whacking off to Russia.

Right now, we’re negotiating to release a Russian terrorist to Putin. Giving Putin Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, and Tucker Carlson would be the same thing.

And, they should all want to go to Russia. Donald Trump worships and idolizes Putin. Steve Bannon is the poster child for American white nationalism and fascism. Paul Manafort was a lobbyist and political consultant for Russian proxies in Ukraine. Michael Flynn was literally paid by Russia. Our nation would just be better off without Roger Stone. And Tucker Carlson wonders why he should hate Putin and choose Ukraine over Russia. He doesn’t have to. Let’s send them all to Russia.

The only obstacle to this plan is that Russia won’t want them. Why would they? What can they do for Russia in Russia? They do a better job of serving Putin’s interests here in the United States, by trying to destroy the United States.

MAGAts always point out that Russia didn’t invade Ukraine while Trump was president (sic). True, but that’s because he didn’t have to. Trump was already trying to destroy NATO for Putin. Invading Ukraine during that time would have been counterproductive for them.

KY Patriot (seriously, that’s his name), another MAGAt on Truth Social, commented on my last cartoon on Brittney Griner saying that if Trump was president, she would be free by now because Trump and Putin are friends. He then wrote “Fuck Brittney and fuck Ukraine.”

Yeah, Trump and Putin are friends. That’s a good thing, to be pals with a fascist? Also, since he wants Brittney to stay in Russia, why is he bragging that Trump would free her? Also, since Trump could convince Putin to free Brittney, why didn’t he get Putin to release Paul Whelan? Whelan was abducted by Russia while Trump was in the White House.

This MAGAt hatred for Brittney is interesting. I saw a post by a goon on Facebook that Brittney deserves to be incarcerated in Russia and shouldn’t be allowed to return to this nation because she’s criticized it in the past. Meanwhile, they’re wearing caps that literally say America is not great. Consistency is a huge problem for MAGAts.

When Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly told Trump that Putin was a “killer” during an interview in 2017, Trump rushed to Putin’s defense and said, “There are a lot of killers. We have a lot of killers. Well, you think our country is so innocent?

You can criticize and love the United States. Closing your eyes and plugging your ears while singing “nanananananana” doesn’t fix anything.

But sending fascist MAGAt goons to Russia in a trade for Brittney would fix a LOT of shit. I think my proposal has merit. Since they love Russia so much, they should go live in Russia.

Music note: I listened to David Bowie and Dion while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Free Brittney


All-star American basketball star Brittney Griner has been in a Russian prison for over 140 days despite the fact she’s not a criminal. And despite the fact she’s not a criminal, she pleaded guilty this week and admitted wrongdoing in packing smoking cartridges in her luggage that contained less than a single gram of hashish oil. It wasn’t even hash. It was ish.

The seven-time All-Star center for the W.N.B.A.’s Phoenix Mercury now faces ten years in a Russian prison. She is being used as leverage for Vladimir Putin in his negotiations with the west.

After Russia illegally invaded Ukraine, the democratic world shut off most trade and set embargoes on Putin’s fascist state. Throughout the world, Russian oligarchs are having their yachts seized. The economy in Russia wasn’t strong to begin with but now it’s teetering on a total collapse. So, Brittney picked a bad time to go to Russia.

Brittney’s plan was to play in the professional Russian basketball league during the WNBA’s offseason. She’s one of the biggest stars in the WNBA and makes around $227,000 a year playing for the Mercury. By comparison, the average NBA salary is over $7 million a year. There’s been speculation over how much effort would be put into freeing a basketball star unfairly imprisoned in Russia if that star was Lebron James…but Lebron James would never have to supplement his income by playing in Russia. NBA players who spend the majority of their career riding the bench would never have to supplement their income by playing in Russia.

There’s not enough outrage and demand in this country to free Brittney. There was more noise being made to free the other Britney from her father controlling her life and business.

Britney Spears is white and blonde. Brittney Griner is nearly seven feet tall, has dreadlocks, is covered in tattoos, black, and is a lesbian. Unfortunately, there’s a large percentage of our population who hate LGBTQ as much as Vladimir Putin.

Note: Another cartoonist will now use the Britney/Brittney comparison for a cartoon now that I’ve made it in this column.

Last Wednesday in Phoenix, the city where Brittney Griner plays and won a WNBA championship, a rally was held for her in the Footprint Center, the Mercury’s home arena which seats over 17,000 people. Only 300 people showed up. How many would have shown up if the player Putin was holding hostage was the Suns’ Chris Paul? Probably at least a few more than 300.

Brittney Griner is not the only American Putin is holding hostage. Paul Whelan has been in a Russian prison since the Trump administration, which should be noted since Trump recently claimed that if he were still president (sic), Brittney would have been freed by now. Sure.

It’s believed Brittney pled guilty to speed the process along and further negotiations between the United States and Russia for her release. Keep in mind that Russia’s judicial system isn’t exactly like ours.

There’s been talk of a prisoner swap with Brittney being traded for Viktor Bout, a Russian who has been imprisoned in the United States since 2012 on a 25-year sentence for conspiring to sell weapons to terrorists planning to kill Americans. During his sentencing, prosecutors called Bout “among the world’s most successful and sophisticated arms traffickers.” He is known as the Merchant of Death.

It’s a lopsided deal to trade the Merchant of Death, who was participating in a terrorist plot against Americans, for a very tall black lesbian whose only crime was carrying a little hashish oil in a vape cartridge. At the very least, Paul Whelan should be included in the trade.

Brittney wrote a letter to President Biden saying, “I’m terrified I might be here forever. Please don’t forget about me.” While receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom from President Biden this week, U.S. soccer player Megan Rapinoe wore a white suit with the letters “BG” on it for Brittney Griner. She later posted on Instagram, “BG, we love you.” She also posted “BG is being used as a political pawn and we need to bring her (home) immediately. This plea doesn’t change that @potus needs to and is working hard to get her home.”

We can’t forget Brittney Griner. Bring Brittney Griner home now.

Free Brittney.

Music note: I listened to the Kaiser Chiefs while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: