April Ryan

Mr. Haterworth


cjones11152018

Donald Trump has an issue with black women. He’s said time and time again that Representative Maxine Waters has a low IQ, he’s feuded with a Gold Star mother who is black and the black congresswoman who defended her, Frederica Wilson. He claimed Stacey Abrams was “unqualified” to be governor of Georgia, despite the fact she was deputy city attorney in Atlanta and has been a member of the Georgia House of Representatives since 2007 and Minority Leader in the House since 2011, which is more government and political experience than hosting a reality TV show.

Of course, Trump doesn’t like black people in general. Before the midterms, he called Florida’s Democratic gubernatorial candidate Andrew Gillum a “thief.” He’s black, so he must be stealing something, right? Trump issues juvenile insults toward all races, but there’s an extra special zeal he puts into it when it comes to black women. When those black women are journalists, well it just gets worse.

Last week, Trump attacked three female journalists in a derisive manner for their audacity of asking him questions.

CNN’s Abby Phillip asked Trump if his acting-Attorney General would “rein in” Special Counsel Robert Mueller, Trump responded with, “What a stupid question that is. What a stupid question. I watch you a lot. You ask a lot of stupid questions.” It wasn’t a stupid question, and he didn’t answer it.

He went after American Urban Radio Networks’ April Ryan for asking him a question about alleged voter suppression in the midterm elections. Trump shouted at her, “Sit down! I didn’t call you. Such a hostile media, it’s so sad. You rudely interrupted him,” he told her, referring to another reporter.

Later, he threatened to pull her White House press credentials, as he did with CNN’s Jim Acosta. “You talk about someone who’s a loser. She doesn’t know what the hell she’s doing. She gets publicity and then she gets a pay raise, or she gets a contract with, I think, CNN. But she’s very nasty and she shouldn’t be. You’ve got to treat the White House and the office of the presidency with respect.” Yes, treating the White House and office of the presidency with respect is a great idea. Unfortunately, screaming at reporters doesn’t do that.

A few moments after screaming at Ryan, he screamed at PBS NewsHour’s Yamiche Alcindor for asking about his recent characterization of himself as “a nationalist” and whether that label was “emboldening white nationalists.” Trump told her, “I don’t know why you say that, that is such a racist question.” Racists always believe it’s racist to point out their racism.

Personally, I’d love to see Trump get stuck in an elevator with Madea.

Creative note: I originally had this idea with Aunt Jemima, but I wasn’t sure if they still, or ever, had a bottle in the shape of a woman. I also wasn’t too sure about this idea. Then, while watching football and eating hot wings at a bar yesterday, I saw the new commercial of KFC’s Colonel dancing with Mrs. Butterworth. I think the cartoon gods were using that disturbing commercial to tell me I had to do this cartoon, and that I was confusing Aunt Jemima with Mrs. Butterworth. Maybe racist corporate mascots all look alike to me.

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Shaking With Spicy


cjones03312017

A lot of journalists have pity and sympathy for White House Spokesman Sean Spicer. He has to be confronted by the national press corps on a daily basis and defend lies and crazy crap.

Sure. You can have some sympathy for people who work for Donald Trump. You’re surrounded by a lot of creepy people. But it’s probably not so much of a problem if you’re a creeper yourself. No one with any personal ethics or morals would be willing to work for Donald Trump.

I don’t have any sympathy for Spicer. Nobody is forcing him to give up his dignity for this horse shit. His very first press conference only covered the size of the inauguration, and the entire ordeal was lie after lie. It was a litany of bullshit. That’s all we’ve had ever since.

When asked who cleared Congressman Devin Nunes (chairman of the committee investigating Trump’s connections with Russia) to enter the White House, Spicer acted as if he was totally ignorant on the procedure for entering the White House. He gave this performance from inside the White House. It’s not like just anyone without any good reason can walk into the…oh never mind. I’ve forgotten about the knuckleheads who are there presently.

During Tuesday’s presser Sean Spicer denied that the White House sought to block former-acting attorney general Sally Yates from testifying before Nunes’ committee. This despite The Washington Post having the letters that proved the Trump administration did indeed seek to block her from testifying (this is why you need to subscribe to a real newspaper, people).

During the press conference Spicer lost his cool and went after American Urban Radio Networks reporter April Ryan. He disagreed with her assessment that Trump has a Russia problem. He said they didn’t, and that the press “has the Russia problem” and during this exchange, he told Ryan to stop shaking her head.

First off, you do have a Russia problem. An FBI, Congressional, and Senate investigations says so. Plus, everyone in your administration has some weird tie to Russian diplomats, ambassadors, oligarchs, and gangsters. Second, how dare you talk down to an adult working in a professional capacity like that. This is the White House press room, not kindergarten. It’s not her job to pander to you.

Some compared Spicer’s treatment of Ryan, who is black, to the ludicrous racist crap Fox News talking head Bill O’Reilly did the other day. While airing footage of Representative Maxine Waters he compared her hair to a James Brown wig. His defense that it wasn’t racist is that he likes James Brown. Also, according to conservative logic you’re not a racist if your jam is “When Doves Cry.” All that racist crap makes conservatives feel good.

Unlike O’Reilly, Spicer wasn’t being racist. He was simply being a dick. He’s treated everyone in the press corps like that except for correspondents for outlets like Breitbart.

Another great line that came out of the presser was when Spicer said “If the president puts Russian salad dressing on his salad tonight, somehow that’s a Russian connection.” I seriously doubt the president eats salads.

Hey look. I made it through a post about Sean Spicer without referencing The Thompson Twins’ “Lies, Lies, Lies, Yeah.” Oh crap.

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