Anthony Weiner

A Weiner Plea


cjones05242017

I don’t care if two consenting adults text pictures of their private parts to each other. It’s probably not a good idea if you’re married unless you’re sending photos of your junk to your wife, which will probably bore her. I also believe you have the right to share these sort of photos with people who want to receive them, though the trappings of society are really discouraging it as they can show up all over the internet, even if you’re not famous. It takes a real low-life scum of a person to hack and spread nude photos of celebrities on the internet that were intended to remain private. It’s just as terrible to distribute pics of your ex on a crummy website. These sort of shares have ruined lives, literally.

One big no-no, and it’s even illegal (like some of the examples above), is to send dirty photos back and forth with a minor if you’re an adult, like Anthony Weiner.

The former U.S. representative from New York City had a very promising political career. He brought it down by sexting. He accidentally tweeted a pic of his junk that was intended for a text. Not content with ruining his Congressional career, he did it again and ruined any chance he had of becoming mayor of NYC. Then he did it again. I’ve lost count how many times he was busted sending pictures of stuff to women. And then he sent them to a minor.

Weiner’s wife, Huma Abedin, couldn’t tolerate his behavior, and the embarrassment, and finally divorced him. Anthony even had a “hand” in taking down the presidential campaign of Hillary Clinton, as the FBI was investigating his sexting with a minor when they found unrelated documents from Hillary Clinton on his computer. James Comey, the then-director of the FBI, told the public they were re-opening the case into Clinton’s server days before the election. Of course none of the Clinton documents turned up any evidence against her. Weiner’s wiener very well may have destroyed our nation. A dick literally put Donald Trump into the White House.

Last Friday Weiner pleaded guilty in court to committing a felony. He cried while he admitted that he knew was “as morally wrong as it was unlawful.” What was morally wrong, and unlawful, was his sexting a 15-year-old girl in North Carolina. Weiner is 52.

Weiner will have to register as a sex offender where he works and lives and he may face prison time. Transferring obscene material to a minor carries a sentence of up to 10 years in prison. That’s a place where a lot of people may be willing to see Mr. Weiner’s wiener. He’ll probably get to see a lot of theirs too though he may not see them coming if he drops the soap.

Weiner will be sentenced in September and with his plea, he will probably be sentenced anywhere from 21-27 months (which means he’ll probably serve a year or so).

During his plea, Weiner said, “I’ve compulsively sought attention from women who contacted me on social media, and I engaged with many of them in both sexual and nonsexual conversation.” He also told the judge “I accept full responsibility for my conduct,” and “I have a sickness, but I do not have an excuse.”

I read a few posts on social media from conservatives upset with him saying he has a sickness. The only description they want to give Weiner is that he’s a pervert.

I don’t have a problem with describing him as a “pervert,” but I do believe he does have a sickness. Here’s a man with a promising career, a beautiful and intelligent wife, a child, and after being caught he’s given more than one opportunity to stop his behavior. He didn’t even change his methods. He kept doing it. That is a sickness.

It is similar to one addicted to drugs or alcohol being fully aware they’re killing themselves but they can’t stop. He does need treatment and I hope he gets it. Of course, I’m a bleeding-heart liberal and I have empathy for others, so what do I know?

Creative notes: When I was doing my four-cartoon marathon Friday I made posts about it on social media. I got a lot of comments from readers about how Trump was keeping me busy, though not a single one of those cartoons was on him. I took yesterday off and went to bed at a normal hour last night (which is weird for me) and started working kinda early today. It was nice to continue to subjects that aren’t Donald Trump.

Believe it or not, I get bored with Trump. I was hitting a wall last week. I’d be real happy going a week with silence from him though I don’t think that’s ever going to happen as long as he’s president.

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Hillary’s Weiner


cjones11012016

I wasn’t going to draw a cartoon tonight. I’m three days ahead with my cartoons to my clients. If you only view my cartoons at GoComics, who runs everything I do because I upload it myself, you’re a few days behind (you should subscribe to GoComics at only $2.00 a month, subscribe to me, and I’ll get a portion of that. Support your favorite cartoonist…and then support me too). I was gonna take the night off. I was going to eat some pork chops and watch my Cubs win game 3 of the World Series. Only one part of my plan happened. The Cubs did not win, I did not take the night off, and I did eat some pork chops.

My plans to be leisurely failed because the FBI decided to announce they were reopening the email case against Hillary Clinton. It’s a good thing I don’t go anywhere without my drawing stuff.

I’m mad. I’m angry about this. Not because of the unfairness toward Hillary Clinton and the Democratic Party. I’m angry because this is political. Eleven days before an election and you want to pop up with this crap?

Let’s take a look at what we know. The FBI’s investigation into Hillary’s use of a private server is over her handling of classified information. This new stuff concerns Anthony Weiner, the mad sexter. Weiner is married to Clinton’s top aide, Huma Abedin. They are now estranged over Weiner’s last sexting scandal.

The FBI was investigating Weiner’s computer since he was accused of some nasty stuff with a 15-year-old. They found something on the computer which was also used by Huma.

What we know is that the emails were NOT on Clinton’s server. They were NOT sent by Clinton. They were NOT on Clinton’s computer. So how in the hell is this about Clinton’s handling of classified information? It’s not.

I’m going to make a bold statement and tell you that this isn’t going anywhere. Huma might be in trouble but I don’t see how this implicates Clinton with mishandling classified information.

I’m mad because we have Russians trying to tamper with our election. We don’t need the FBI to start twerking with the process.

Here’s another reason I don’t think there’s anything to this reopened investigation: Hillary Clinton wants to talk about it. She never wants to talk about her emails. She’s clamoring for the FBI to release everything they know. Hillary Clinton never wants that.

This is an October surprise and it’s a huge fail. Trump claims it’s as big as Watergate which means he didn’t even see the movie, less enough follow the investigation or study history. How can you say something is “bigger than Watergate” when you don’t know what’s in it? How can Republicans be so gleeful over the FBI director basically saying they need to see if the new emails are significant?

Trump is also angry that Hillary is critical of the FBI over this handling. Like Trump has only had nice things to say about the FBI before Friday.

I don’t expect most of my clients to run this cartoon, but that’s OK because I give them more than I promise. My internet-only publications will love it. I’m taking tomorrow off. You have enough cartoons from me. Let me sleep. I’m probably taking tomorrow off.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Yuge Weiner News


cjones09012016

Anthony Weiner is a serial sexter.

For the Boy Scouts reading this, sexting is when you text a picture of your junk. You gotta know what I mean by “junk.” You’re on the internet.

Anthony Weiner is a former congressman from New York City. He let sexting destroy his congressional career in 2011. It almost destroyed his marriage to Hillary Clinton aide Huma Abedin, but she hung in there (no pun intended).

The controversy kinda blew over (again, no pun intended) and in 2013 he ran for mayor of NYC…and guess what happened. Mr. Weiner got embroiled in another sexting scandal, this time under the alias “Carlos Danger.” He was not elected mayor. Abedin again, stuck it out (you’re gonna start thinking I’m doing these puns on purpose).

His wife has been in the center of controversies regarding the Clinton Foundation so the last thing she or the Clinton campaign needed was another assist by Mr. Weiner. As scheduled, Anthony trying to live up to his last name stuck his crotch into a camera phone…again. He said he was conversing with an old friend and there was nothing lewd about the pictures. This supposedly non-lewd picture, exposed by The New York Post (did I say “exposed?” I swear I’m not even trying), shows his and Abedin’s young son in the pic right next to Anthony’s crotch.

How did that come about? “Hey, check out my baby boy….and check out this bad boy.”

Who does that? You send a picture of your crotch next to your child? There’s a baby picture you don’t want coming up on your 16th birthday. Here I am with Daddy’s crotch. Anthony, you sick bastard.

Huma has had enough and she’s not taking anymore. She’s finally decided to separate from the Weiner man. Unless she’s texted him her decision he’s probably not aware of it. Right now everyone needs to calm down and hope nothing else stupid comes along.

Enter Donald Trump.

Trump, who’s apparently seriously and heavily invested in the Weiner relationship, sent out the statement “Huma is making a very wise decision. I know Anthony Weiner well, and she will be far better off without him.” If they get back together that’s gonna be so awkward for Trump next time they hangout.

Trump also used the couple’s personal issues to make an argument against voting for Clinton. He claimed it was unsafe for Clinton to have classified information around Abedin who would then take it home to her husband who would then text it out. Unless that information was written on Mr. Weiner’s penis I don’t think we’d be in any danger.

Trump is right. We should be very concerned about who the candidates have around classified information. What if one them had a Russian lobbyist as a campaign manager? That threatens the nation a lot more than Anthony’s ding-a-ling.

A few days ago when basketball player Dwyane Wade’s cousin was shot in Chicago Trump tweeted out how horrible it was and that African-Americans will be propelled be the event to vote for Trump.

Everything has to do with Donald Trump. Terrorist strike in Paris? Better vote for Trump. A gunman shoots up a gay nightclub in Orlando? Better vote for Trump. A young mother taking her baby out in a stroller gets shot on a sidewalk in Chicago ? Better vote for Trump. A famous person’s marriage implodes? Better vote for Trump. A dog crap on your lawn today? Better vote for Trump. Got the trots? Better vote for Trump. They cancelled Mike & Molly. Better vote for Trump.

There’s an argument that Trump is unfit to be president. Republican Ana Navarro said Trump is unfit to be human.

Trump says he knows Anthony Weiner very well and I believe that. They’re both sociopaths.

Better vote for Trump.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!