West Wing

Melania’s Bad Side Can Be A Drag


Melania Trump is not the first First Lady to influence her husband, the president of the United States. It’s not unusual, unique, or strange.

Sarah Polk helped her husband craft speeches and wrote letters for him. Sarah Fillmore helped create the White House library, which Trump still doesn’t know is in there. Caroline Harrison, a proponent of women’s rights and historic preservation was the first president-general of the Daughters of the American Revolution while she was serving as First Lady. Woodrow Wilson didn’t see anything unless his wife, Edith, approved, as she made daily decisions about what items should or should not be taken to him. Eleanor Roosevelt fought for the New Deal and women’s and civil rights while in the White House. Betty Ford was an advocate for the Equal Rights Amendment and the legalization of abortion (Time called her the country’s “Fighting First Lady,” and many conservatives wanted her to resign, though I don’t know how that would work). Betty even delivered her husband’s concession speech. Rosalynn Carter sat in on cabinet meetings. Hillary Clinton was appointed by her husband to the Task Force on National Health Care Reform and became and still, is a national villain to gaslighted Republicans. Nancy Reagan coordinated her husband’s schedule with an astrological chart, claimed Donald Regan, who was fired as Chief-of-Staff for disagreeing with her.

Normally, a First Lady’s influence on the staff is leaked out from White House insiders and not blasted in a press release stating the equivalent of “I hate their rancid ass and it should be kicked to the curb.” That’s basically what the East Wing issued yesterday in calling for the ouster of deputy national security adviser Mira R. Ricardel. The West Wing issued a response that they had no control over the East Wing. There’s more drama between these wings than left and right Twix.

The statement read, “It is the position of the Office of the First Lady that she no longer deserves the honor of serving in this White House.” No. There wasn’t a “meow” at the end, but she did tweet later about World Kindness Day. Here’s the weirdest part; Ricardel hasn’t been fired yet.

Ricardel is John Bolton’s deputy because that much xenophobia needs an assistant. Three current and two former White House officials said Tuesday that Ricardel had berated people in meetings, yelled at professional staff, argued with the first lady and spread rumors about Defense Secretary James Mattis. Now, I wanna know the Mattis rumors. They can’t be any worse than the president’s Mario-Mushroom rumor.

Chief-of-Staff John Kelly has been pushing for Ricardel’s ouster, but Melania may be pushing for his too.

There are rampant rumors that Homeland Security Director Kirstjen Nielsen and Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke are also on the poop list.

Melania told ABC News in an interview last month that there are some White House advisers she doesn’t trust. It’s nice to know we’re not the only ones except, I don’t trust any of them.

Maybe it’s good for us that Melania is influencing who should stay and go. But, perhaps she should focus on the East Wing a bit more than the West Wing. Not because she’s a woman, but because she has started a campaign she hasn’t engaged in. Her anti-bullying campaign is stark hypocrisy and a national joke since her husband is the most sexist bully this side of Biff Tannen. It would be like Ivanka leading an anti-nepotism campaign.

Personally, I’m looking forward to the future firing and their replacements and their future firings. I’m also hoping Trump acts as his own Chief-of-Staff for a while. But to be honest, I’m also a big fan of train wrecks.

I’m going out right now to buy Melania an astrological chart.

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