Traitor Trump

Spy Vs Orange Spy


cjones09172019

Here’s a catch-22 for Donald Trump. He can say the press is right that a spy was extracted from the Kremlin out of fears his big, fat, treasonous mouth would expose him to Vladimir Putin, or he can say the media is wrong and he was pulled out because details in their reporting of Russian meddling in the 2016 election was exposing the spy. Option one admits he’s a threat to national security either inadvertently out of stupidity or on purpose out of treason. If he picks option two, he admits there was Russian meddling. Donald Trump is not smart enough to catch or wiggle his way around that. Neither are his supporters. Go have fun with that today, kids while arguing on social media with the fucknuts.

The CIA is saying the press got it wrong and he was extracted because of option two and journalists picked up details about the CIA’s Kremlin sources. But, the CIA offered to pull the spy out in 2016 and he refused. They offered again in 2017 after Donald Trump was elected, and the spy accepted. And why wouldn’t he?

Donald Trump gives Russia preferential treatment over the United States. If you don’t believe me, just look at his reactions to the Russia investigation. Donald Trump created a lie that President Obama wiretapped Trump Tower. Then, he created a lie that the FBI planted a spy into his presidential campaign. Vladimir Putin did actually try, and maybe succeeded, in planting a spy in the Trump Campaign and President Dotard has never expressed any emotion over that or has even acknowledged it. That’d be like getting upset over an imaginary dog peeing on your tires after a Gorilla took a crap on your back seat.

Decades ago, the CIA recruited a midlevel Russian official who then advanced through the government’s ranks. The agency struck gold as he eventually gained access to the highest levels of the Kremlin. He became one of the CIA’s most important, and protected assets during the 2016 presidential election. He was protected to the point that he was not included in any of President Obama’s daily briefings so to limit the number of people with knowledge of the spy, and instead separate intelligence reports were sent to the president in specially-sealed envelopes.

The spy was able to confirm that Putin ordered and orchestrated Russia’s interference in our election himself and that the Russian president affirmatively favored Trump and personally ordered the hacking of the Democratic National Committee.

How do you think Putin would have reacted to catching a spy in the Kremlin? In March 2018, Russia poisoned a former spy and his daughter…in England.

So, if you’re a spy in the Kremlin feeding information to the CIA, you may feel a little nervous with an American presidential candidate praising Putin repeatedly while disparaging his own president. After that candidate is elected, you would probably get the night sweats. After seeing that president reveal classified information to the Russian ambassador and foreign minister in the Oval freaking Office, you would probably call the CIA and scream, “Get me the fuck out of here.”

If the spy wasn’t extracted by the Helsinki Summit, he may have thrown own ass off a building.

Donald Trump has had private, closed-door meetings with Putin. Trump has talked to Putin with only the Russian’s interpreter present. Trump has ordered an American interpreter to burn her notes after a closed-door session with Putin. Trump, while standing next to Putin, took his word that Russia didn’t meddle in our election over that of America’s intelligence agencies. Donald Trump, according to reports, even offered Putin a bribe to erect a Trump Tower in Moscow when he was a presidential candidate (instead, Putin bought Trump). Last week, Donald Trump tweeted a classified photo. So yeah, I’m sure that spy wanted out of Russia all because of the U.S. media.

Here’s a fun fact: Donald Trump has only polled above 50% in two nations and one of them is not the United States. One of those nations is Israel and I’ll give you only one guess for the other. If you’re a Republican, I’ll give you a hint: There’s been a few mentions of it already in today’s blog. Hey, I said only one hint.

The spy’s identity and location have not been reported. For his safety, let’s hope Donald Trump hasn’t been told.

Creative notes: I use two copy editors for my cartoons, Laura and Hilary. They’re wonderful. They both caught “by who” in this cartoon and said “by whom” is correct. But, they both said to keep “by who.” Laura said that nobody talks that way and “by whom” sounds “stilted.” Hilary wasn’t as delicate and said “by whom,” and I’m quoting her here…sounds “douchey.”

I love them.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Village Idiot


cjones07282017

Wednesday morning, Donald Trump tweeted, “After consultation with my Generals and military experts, please be advised that the United States Government will not accept or allow……” And left the nation, “his” generals, and the military waiting for nine minutes before completing the sentence. And yes, he left the nation hanging with “dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.” 

So we were left waiting nine minutes to find out what the military will no longer accept or allow. What could it be? Gays? Women? K-Rations? Scarf wearing single guys who like Maroon 5? None of the above.

Trump is changing the Obama policy of allowing transgender individuals from serving in the military in any capacity. The generals first response to this was, “we were consulted?” As usual, Trump lied. He also wants to change everything Obama implemented. It’s a really good thing the White House had indoor plumbing before the Obama administration or that would be gone now too.

Trump reveres our military and in two more tweets stated, “our military must be focused on decisive and overwhelming victory and cannot be burdened with the tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgender in the military would entail.” However, they can be burdened by learning about major policy changes through Twitter. Good job, Commander in Chief. What’s next? The Joint Chiefs learning of a nuclear strike via tweet?

Never mind the fact that the military is supportive of transgenders serving in our volunteer services. A study commissioned by the Pentagon says only a fraction of active duty transgender service members were likely to seek medical treatment, resulting in a high-end estimate of an $8.4 million increase in health care costs, or 0.13 percent. The same study estimates that for active duty and reserves, between 2,150 and 10,790 active duty and reserve service members may identify as transgender. That’s out of 1.28 million active duty personnel and a little more than 800,000 in the reserves.

By comparison, the military spends $84 million a year on erectile dysfunction. We spend around $2 million every time the White House dysfunction flies to Mar-a-Lago.

Democrats weren’t alone in opposing this new policy. Several Republicans are opposed to it, including conservative stalwarts like Joni Ernst, Richard Shelby, and Orrin Hatch. Do you realize how difficult it is to be on the right of Orrin Hatch? You’re one step away from wearing a white hood.

The White House couldn’t even explain this new policy. Sarah Huckabee Sanders floundered when asked for details. The Pentagon sent all inquiries to the White House which sent the inquiries back to the Pentagon. Nobody wanted to, or could explain what will happen to transgender people who are currently serving. The White House has better explained the Ivanka shoe collection than any government policy.

Transgenders have been serving in our military and dying for their country for decades. I’ve never met anyone serving in the military, or who had served who didn’t want to bust their ass for their country. Each and every single one wanted to serve their nation and weren’t the types to avoid it by complaining of bone spurs. I don’t recall anyone who joined because it was easy. If it was easy, Donald Trump would have served.

A year ago while campaigning for president, Trump positioned himself as a friend of the LGBT community.

He vowed that he would do more than Democrat Hillary Clinton to protect LGBT people. He defended the rights of Caitlyn Jenner, the country’s most well-known transgender advocate, to use whichever bathroom she wanted in Trump Tower. And he added “Q” to his discussion of the “LGBTQ community” in his Republican National Convention speech to show he was in the know.

“People are people to me, and everyone should be protected,” he told The Washington Post in a May 2016 interview.

So what changed for Trump? First, he needed to shift attention away from his promise that he would repeal and replace Obamacare. What better way to distract from a broken campaign promise by breaking another campaign promise?

Trump also needs to shore up his conservative base because he’s about to seriously piss them off. What better way to remind them that you’re their guy by hating on transgenders? Conservatives really hate transgenders, gay people, lesbians, journalists, teachers, guys with man buns, science, books, etc. They won’t even order bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches anymore because “BLT” sounds too similar to “LGBT.”

How is Trump about to piss off his base? By firing his Attorney General Jeff Sessions. The conservative base loves Sessions as he’s a discriminating-lovin’ kinda guy too. But Trump needs to tell his base that he shares their hate, in case they forget his Vice President is Mike Pence, who advocates for gay-conversion therapy.

The military has a term that really fits this president’s administration. It’s called “fubar.” Under Trump, our government is fucked up beyond all recognition.

Creative notes: I do research the topics I draw and write about. For this, I didn’t just read up on Trump’s new ban. I also read up on the Village People. They’re still around, some form of them anyway (all the bands from your youth are really just cover bands now like Boston, Kiss, Styx, etc.). Yes, the soldier in the Village People is named “Alex.” I hope Alex likes the cartoon.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.