Social Media

Zuck Face Fox Hate


Cjones10082021

It’s not surprising or new news that Facebook sells hate and division. It’s not even surprising they know this and aren’t doing much about it. The news here is that now we know they know and they know we know they know and now it’s official. Facebook actually did an internal study to find out just how bad they are, and when their suspicions were confirmed, they just nodded to each other and carried on with business as usual.

The only difference between Facebook and Fox News selling hate and false information is that Facebook stumbled upon it and Fox News built its entire business model around it. Fox News didn’t give Tucker Carlson, Sean Hannity, or Laura Ingraham shows and later go, “wha’aaaaat?” They’re not Stephanie Grisham who took five years to figure out Donald Trump was a vile and horrible person.

And in Fox News’ defense, they at least fired Diamond and Silk for spreading false information about Covid-19 but they still have a monetized Facebook page. Guess what they do with it.

Frances Haugen revealed herself on 60 minutes as the Facebook whistleblower. She is the former lead product manager on the company’s civic misinformation team and she leaked thousands of internal documents to The Wall Street Journal. She says she leaked the documents so that “no one can question that this is real.” I don’t think that’s going to be a problem…at least not among anyone who uses Facebook.

She told CBS’ Scott Pelley her lawyers have filed at least eight complaints with the Securities and Exchange Commission that point to discrepancies between Facebook’s internal research and the company’s external statements on issues like hate speech and mental health. She has compared Facebook to the tobacco companies. Both have knowingly lied to Congress and the public about how toxic their products are.

Haugen explained when it comes to public safety and profits, Facebook chose profits every time, which is what big tobacco did.

For example, look what happened on January 6. Facebook, along with Twitter, were used to strategize, organize, and plot out the insurrection to overturn the government. Twitter reacted and banned thousands of accounts, including Donald Trump. Facebook followed and ditched Trump…but thousands of similar hate groups remain. For another example, there are still people on Facebook stating the terrorist attack by white nationalists was just a protest and the Capitol Police who defended it are murderers for shooting terrorist Ashley Babbitt.

People who supported terrorists on the internet used to stay in the dark web. Now they’re out in the open.

Haugen claims one internal study suggested Facebook only took action on three to five percent of hate speech and less than one percent of violence and incitement content on Facebook. But if you post a cartoon criticizing the Taliban, you may get banned for three days. And then afterward, the algorithms are set to where not as many people see that particular cartoonist’s posts, the number of likes, comments, and shares for his cartoons go down, he gets fewer hits to his website which is monetized, cutting into his income, and he gets messages from people asking, “Hey…are you OK? I haven’t seen anything new from you in weeks” despite the fact he posts a new cartoon every…single…freaking…day.

I heard that happened to somebody.

Facebook had a bad Monday. Grrr, Mondays. They woke up to a 60 minutes exposé (I know, Andréa. I can’t make accent marks) and then they had a shutdown that lasted for several hours. You may have heard about it. It was like Facebook was in Facebook jail (I stole that from a comment on Facebook).

If you were a conspiracy theorist, you might believe Facebook’s outage was intentional to remind us just how much we hate/love Facebook. And they’re right. Look how many people on Facebook made posts about Facebook’s shutdown. I have one friend (to protect him, I will not tell you his name is J.P. Trostle) who swears he’ll never use Facebook again, but returned yesterday to give a Nelson Muntz Ha-Ha to Facebook for the shutdown.

It’s perfectly fine to criticize Facebook on Facebook. How else would they see it? It’s like AOC and her tax-the-rich dress worn at a $35,000-a-plate charity event. They’re not going to get the message if she only wears it in a barrio.

The Facebook whistleblower is testifying before the Senate as I write this. That means, nothing is going to happen. She’s testifying before people who have internal documents revealing trickle-down doesn’t work but keep voting for trickle-down. She’s testifying before people who were hiding under tables during the insurrection but still voted against impeaching Trump for instigating the insurrection. She’s testifying before the people who were hiding behind drapes and on the phone with Donald Trump screaming, “Please, call off your horde of white nationalist racist terrorist goons” to no avail, but still flew down to Mar-a-Lago for photo-ops with Donald Trump while groveling at his stinky feet. She’s testifying before people who were screaming during the attack, “Save me, Capitol Police officers…save me! Barricade that door! Protect me! I don’t wanna die! YAAAAAAGHHH!” and later voted against giving the Capitol Police officers medals and honoring them as heroes. If Congress goes after Mark Zuckerberg, all he has to do is put on a MAGA hat.

Fun fact: Republicans love Facebook just as much as you do. Nazis, Klansmen, Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, and New York City firefighters use it just as much as Black Lives Matter, Move On, and Leonardo DiCaprio.

Another fun fact: I will never stop laughing every time I see this video. This tells me Mark Zuckerger is the kind of boss that nobody who works for him can say something is a bad idea or when he looks like a moron. He needs to hire a sassy southern secretary, the type who can tell him, “Sugar, oh no. If you were going as someone who can relate to commoners, and loves something that’s not himself, you can kiss my grits ’cause that ain’t it.”

Creative license: The offices for Facebook and Fox News don’t really face each other. While Facebook’s headquarters is in California, they do have an office in New York City and it’s nowhere near Fox News, but they are both in Manhattan. Facebook is in lower Manhattan on Broadway between 8th and 9th street while Fox News is in midtown on 6th Avenue between 51st and 50th. I’m that kind of geek to know that and find it important.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are FIVE copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Biden Zucked Over


Cjones07222021

President Joe Biden started his weekend by calling out social media for allowing false information, lies, conspiracy theories, and right-wing bullshit over the coronavirus and vaccines to persist on their platforms. He said social media is “killing people.” The president (the real one, not the orange doofus in south Florida screaming at the sky and the MyPillow Guy) is right.

Sunday, Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy, backed the president up and said, “These platforms have to recognize they’ve played a major role in the increase in speed and scale with which misinformation is spreading.”

Jen Psaki, the White House press secretary, also called out misinformation “that is leading to people not taking the vaccine, and people are dying as a result.” She said the White House had a responsibility to raise the issue. And it does, especially after the previous administration spread lies from the White House. It’s nice to have a press secretary that calls out misinformation instead of spreading it. It’s nice to have a press secretary instead of a press goon.

Facebook fired back in a blog post and said it’s not their fault President Biden missed his goal of 70% of Americans being vaccinated by July 4th. Now, if President Biden’s goal for July 4th was to get Mark Zuckerberg to look like a billionaire douche-boy on a windsurfer doohicky thingy while holding an American flag to John Denver’s “Country Roads,” mission accomplished.

In the blog post, Guy Rosen, Facebook’s vice president of integrity (that’s a thing?), claimed that among Facebook’s American users, vaccine hesitancy had declined by 50 percent since April and vaccine acceptance had increased by 10 to 15 percentage points, or to over 80 percent from 70 percent. He wrote, “The fact is that vaccine acceptance among Facebook users in the U.S. has increased.” But so have the the lies. Can Mr. V.P. of Integrity tell us how much resistance to vaccinations has risen? Who are they polling?

Look, Guy…getting rid of one orange flaming gasbag of lies isn’t going to do the trick. Facebook and other platforms are doing an extremely shitty job of eradicating lies. And a lot of times, you guys miss and knock out the good guys spreading facts. I know you can’t catch every piece of bullshit on a platform that has nearly three billion users, but I have personally reported lies just to see Facebook ignore them. I know people who have pages with nothing but lies. And while you’re at it, you should eject any political cartoon that’s based on a conspiracy theory or some stupid shit that Tucker said.

There are lies on Facebook that vaccines will make you sterile, plant tracking devices, cause autism, give you covid, or that it’s even safer to catch covid than to get a vaccine. I’m surprised there aren’t rumors the vaccine will give you a tail.

The anti-vaxxers aren’t just content with themselves not getting the vaccines. They’re on a propaganda campaign to convince others not to get vaccinated. They’re worst than atheist and vegans. You have never met a vegan who didn’t tell you they’re a vegan…and you’re not going to meet an anti-vaxxer who doesn’t tell you anti-vax bullshit.

Anti-vaxxers have politicized the entire thing because they want to see our nation fail. They literally cheered at CPAC when it was mentioned that we had missed the 70 percent vaccination rate. Yay! We’re all gonna die! That’s owning the libs!

These people have already proven they don’t care about democracy. They’ve even proven they don’t care about this country. So, what makes you think they care about other people’s safety? Spoiler alert: They don’t.

And there’s the concern among social media platforms that by removing bullshit that will kill Americans, they’re stifling free speech. They really hate it when Tucker screams at them on Fox News for not allowing white nationalist terrorists a platform. But here’s the thing, nobody has free speech on social media.

You do not have a right to express yourself on social media. That’s a privilege. That applies to liberals telling the truth, right-wing fucknuts telling you Jewish bears are placing tracking chips into our nation’s salmon, grandma sharing cat memes, or my friend Cindy who posts daily selfies (she’s pretty). Even when Facebook removes one of my cartoons (because they’re stupid), I don’t claim my 1st Amendment rights have been violated or claim censorship. I complain about the lack of consistency and that it didn’t actually violate their stupid community guidelines.

If you can’t say something on social media, that doesn’t mean you can’t say it.

And why did the vice-president of integrity write the blog for Facebook’s reply to the president? Was the president of integrity too busy getting high with a hooker?

Two things I can NOT get over right now is that Facebook has an integrity department and that Mark Zuckerberg Country Roads windsurfing video. What Facebook needs is a department that tells oblivious people in the company when they’re looking like a national laughingstock.

Did you know that having “Country Roads” stuck in your head will make you grow a tail?

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are SEVEN copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

Watch me draw:

Big Tech Censorship


cjones01232021

When conservatives complain about “big tech censorship,” which is their latest buzz phrase, they don’t really care. They care about censorship about as much as they really care about “election integrity.” They don’t.

My former step-sister in Illinois posted a video of someone I don’t know moaning about “big tech censorship” of conservatives and how it was so unfair. The video was from the TikTok platform. I found that very ironic since Donald Trump actually tried to ban TikTok in this country.

Donald Trump tried to ban TikTok because it was used to snatch up tickets to his Tulsa rally, thus embarrassing him when nobody showed up (except Herman Cain) after his campaign boasted about the millions who would be there (seriously, they set up giant screens outside so all the people who couldn’t get inside the venue could still hear Trump’s rambling rhetoric…and nobody was out there). It was so bad, he fired his campaign manager. But I don’t recall a huge conservative backlash of Trump stripping away people’s freedom of speech. I don’t recall any conservative using the word “censorship.”

Donald Trump blocked people on Twitter who were mean to him. Since his account was considered a “public service,” you know, because he was president (sic), courts ruled he couldn’t block anyone. Trump’s tweets were considered official record. Every American had the right to see his tweets and understand just what an unhinged lunatic and national security threat we had occupying the Oval Office. But again, his supporters didn’t jump on him for blocking people. Conservatives never took issue with Trump’s Twitter activity, even when he retweeted Nazis. He retweeted a LOT of Nazis. And now, Republicans are really upset over a Twitter account being removed that retweeted Nazis. Fucking Nazis, people!

Now that Twitter and Facebook have removed Donald Trump from their platforms, and thousands of Trump supporters, they’re being accused of censorship and discriminating against conservative speech. Republicans are up in arms. South Dakota, or North Dakota, one of the Dakotas is trying to make it legal to sue “big tech” if they censor you. I think to take advantage of this, every Trump supporter in the United States should move to whichever Dakota it is that’s doing that. One of my conservative cartooning colleagues went on Twitter and tweeted multiple times challenging Twitter to remove his account. At this time, Twitter still hasn’t removed his account. Do you know why? Because they don’t care. Also, he should move to one of the Dakotas.

Here’s the thing, MAGAts…and please pay attention: Social media is NOT discriminating against you. Big tech is NOT out to get you. Here’s a helpful hint: If you’re complaining on Twitter or Facebook about their censorship and they haven’t removed your posts complaining about their censorship, then you’re probably not being censored.

Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube are not trying to silence conservative voices. What these platforms are doing, including Amazon removing Parler from its servers, is removing terrorists and people who support terrorists. They’re removing the ability for terrorist fucks to coordinate, plan, and incite other terrorist fucks. Now, it just so happens that all these terrorists are conservatives and Trump supporters.

If you don’t want your social media account removed, stop being a terrorist fuck. It’s pretty simple.

No private company owes you a platform to spread lies, conspiracy theories, or to coordinate terrorist attacks. They don’t owe you a platform to recruit new members for your hate group.

Do you remember when ISIS, al-Qaida, and other terrorist organizations were removed from social media platforms and the servers that hosted them? I do. These guys were really good at using social media and the internet to organize and recruit. Eventually, “big tech” started removing them after there were calls for them to do so. Do you remember who yelled for Twitter to remove ISIS supporters? A lot of people making those demands were…wait for it…Republicans.

ISIS was so good at using social media to recruit, they were recruiting Americans. They were also recruiting people from the United Kingdom and Europe (I separate the two because I know people in the UK who HATE being included with Europe. It’s kinda like us with Florida and Alabama). Do you know who else has been good at using the internet to recruit terrorists? Trump supporters.

The Southern Poverty Law Center says hate groups increased their membership by 55% during the Trump era. Actually, they reported that in 2018, so it’s probably a lot higher now. And Donald Trump encouraged the hate groups. After the tiki-torch Nazis marched in Charlottesville and killed Heather Heyer, Donald Trump said there were good people among those chanting “Jews will not replace us” and “blood and soil.” During a debate with Joe Biden, when asked to denounce the hate group Proud Boys, instead of denouncing them, he told them to “stand by.” Stand by for what? We found out.

Donald Trump called for his hate groups to go to Washington, D.C. on January 6. He told them it would “wild.” He and his supporters claim he didn’t want them to be violent, so that means he only wanted a bloodless coup. Donald Trump told his angry crowd of white nationalists to “march” on the Capitol. For months, he told them a big lie about the election being stolen. A lie he’s still telling. He told them to fight and they couldn’t be weak. He said if they didn’t fight, they’d lose their country. They attacked the Capitol. They vandalized the place. They stole items. They killed a cop. The beat up other cops. They brought nooses and chanted, “Hang Mike Pence.” They screamed to find Nancy Pelosi and vandalized her office. They brought pipe bombs and Molotov cocktails. They shit in the hallways.

Who does that? Terrorists do that. Terrorists bring pipe bombs and shit on the floor. “Make American great again” apparently means stop using toilets and shit on floors. How about, “Make Republicans house broken again?”

A lot of conservatives are saying they didn’t want the violence, just the insurrection. They wanted the coup. They wanted to install a fascist dictator who had lost an election. But they didn’t mean to hurt anybody. While screaming about defending the Constitution, they tried to stop Congress from doing a Constitutional duty. These were terrorists. If they weren’t, then why did Trump supporters initially try to blame Antifa?

And after storming the Capitol, ransacking the place, committing murder, and that disgusting stuff you did in the hallways, you have the gall to scream about being censored.

Nobody is censoring you. Stop yelling this is like the George Orwell novel “1984.” I don’t remember you idiots mentioning “1984” or using the term “Orwellian” when Donald Trump called for abolishing the First Amendment, that protects free speech, when he said the government to be able to go after social media platforms and publications for writing stuff he didn’t like. People who haven’t read “1984” should stop comparing things to it. Go read “1984,” and after that, read “Animal Farm,” and the First Amendment. The good news is, they’re all very easy reads.

Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube are all private platforms. The government doesn’t own them. They do not owe you a damn thing. A private company shutting you down is not censorship. You can still speak…just not there. And I seem to remember Trump supporters being all about freedom for private businesses when it comes to birth control insurance and gay wedding cakes.

Trump supporters are outraged that Donald Trump is now silenced by Twitter, despite his still having the bully pulpit. Why, what ever did presidents do previously to speak to Americans? FDR conducted fireside chats. Some presidents, I have been told, have used this new device thing called “television.” Did I pronounce that correctly? All the kids are talking about it. Look into it.

If the biggest takeaway you have from the terrorist attack on the Capitol is that “big tech” is being mean to terrorists, go screw yourself. Stop defending terrorists…like Donald Trump.

If your accounts on social media are being deleted by “big tech,” it’s probably not because you’re a conservative. It’s probably because you’re supporting terrorists. Maybe, it’s because you are a terrorist.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have an order of 20 copies of my book (11 are left to purchase) on the way, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. The books won’t arrive until after the new year, but orders are being taken and they’ll be shipped as soon as I receive them. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Twitter Vs. Twitler


cjones05312020

For Donald Trump, persecution is having the standards everyone else has to live by being applied to him.

And here’s the thing: That hasn’t even happened in this situation.

Lori Klausutis was a staffer to then-Congressman Joe Scarborough when she suddenly died from a heart problem which made her hit her head on a desk in the Florida district office for the congressman. Scarborough was in Washington at the time. There has never been any evidence of foul play. But, just like the Seth Rich conspiracy theories MAGAts and the 4chan crowd like to spread, they’re using the death of Ms. Klausutis to engage in attacks against one of their Dear Leader’s political enemies, Joe Scarborough who is now the host of MSNBC’s Morning Joe. And guess who’s joined in?

Donald Trump has used the death of Ms. Klausutis for his own political gain. After being super chummy with Scarborough and his wife, Mika Brzezinski (who used to visit Mar-a-Lago, help him with debate prep, and gave candidate Trump more airtime than anyone), Trump became a target of their criticism since shortly after his inauguration when Joe and Mika suddenly realized Donald Trump is a fucking moron. Donald Trump has been attacking and bullying the couple ever since.

On May 12, Donald Trump tweeted, “When will they open a Cold Case on the Psycho Joe Scarborough matter in Florida. Did he get away with murder? Some people think so. Why did he leave Congress so quietly and quickly? Isn’t it obvious? What’s happening now? A total nut job!”

On May 27, Donald Trump tweeted, “Psycho Joe Scarborough is rattled, not only by his bad ratings but all of the things and facts that are coming out on the internet about opening a Cold Case. He knows what is happening!”

Donald Trump has accused Joe Scarborough of murder and of having an affair with Lori Klausutis. Donald Trump is a piece of crap.

Mr. Klausutis’ widower, Timothy Klausutis wrote a letter to the head of Twitter, Jack Dorsey, citing the pain that Trump’s “horrifying lies” about his wife’s death have caused him and the family, and asking Dorsey to remove Trump’s tweet. Twitter refused to remove Donald Trump’s tweets because they’re cowards.

These tweets from Donald Trump are more than lies. They’re slander and defamation. These are the kind of things a person gets sued for. These are the kind of tweets that violate Twitter’s policy. If you tweeted asking if someone got away with murder, who isn’t a murderer, Twitter would not just remove that tweet. They would delete your account. But Donald Trump gets away with it because he’s president (sic) of the United States and Twitter is afraid of his followers.

So, to save some of their face, Twitter put a fact check on two of Donald Trump’s tweets lying about mail-in voter fraud. Donald Trump flipped out and cried that Twitter was “stifling his freedom of speech.” Of course, that’s a lie too because your speech isn’t being stifled when someone points out your lies. Twitter hasn’t even removed his “speech.” Even if Twitter removed all of his tweets and deleted his account, his free speech still wouldn’t be violated.

Twitter is a private company. If McDonalds told Donald Trump they would never sell him a hamberder ever again, that would not deny him access to hamberders. Other companies sell hamberders. Donald Trump can make his own hamberder. McDonald’s can’t even deny him access to their Big Mac special sauce because it’s just Thousand Islands salad dressing. If Twitter killed Donald Trump’s account, Donald Trump can still tell lies in other venues…like on Morning Joe which he used to call into on a daily basis.

Donald Trump is too stupid to be president (sic).

Donald Trump was so enraged by the fact check that he didn’t mention the milestone of 100,000 deaths from the coronavirus. Donald Trump only cares about Donald Trump.

Now, Donald Trump is threatening to “regulate” or shut down Twitter and other social media platforms. Ironically, that would be stifling freedom of speech. There’s also the irony of fighting Twitter by tweeting at Twitter.

Later today, Donald Trump is going to sign an executive order that mandates a review of a law that shields companies like Twitter, Google and Facebook from being held liable for the content appearing on their platforms. Uh…so he doesn’t want Twitter to be protected from allowing him to post lies and slander?

Think about it because Donald Trump hasn’t: If Twitter isn’t protected by dumbass bullshit, lies, conspiracy theories, slander, and defamation posted on their platform by orange racists, wouldn’t that mean Donald Trump’s Twitter account would then be deleted or heavily edited?

This is like taking his ball and going home, but Donald Trump doesn’t own the ball and unfortunately, he’s not going home. He’s going to stick around and make everyone else miserable with his whining.

Of course, this is just one great big morbidly obese bluff. Donald Trump has NO authority to restrict free speech, to regulate, or shut down social media platforms. And, Donald Trump without Twitter would be like Donald Trump without his orange face paint, or Donald Trump without the long red tie, or Donald Trump without the ill-fitting suits he buys off the rack despite having his own line of suits, or Donald Trump without the dead yellow ferret on his head, or Donald Trump without Nazis, or…etc, etc.

And what kind of president issues an executive order only to defend himself? This action is only because his feelings were hurt. This executive order doesn’t have anything to do with protecting anyone except Donald Trump. While the Trump cult and Republicans label liberals as “snowflakes,” they are the most vicitimed and whiny people on the planet. Their leader is such a snowflake that he’s issuing an executive order because his feelings were hurt. In case you’re a Republican, THIS is why there’s a great big giant Trump Baby balloon. And the worst thing is, Twitter hasn’t even restricted him. He can still lie and defame people on Twitter without any empathy.

Donald Trump has more empathy over Twitter putting a fact check on his lies than he does for the family of Lori Klausutis having to suffer through his defamation.

It took Donald Trump two months to kinda-sorta realize the coronavirus was real and not a “Democratic hoax,” but only two days to issue an executive order about Twitter slapping his tweets with a fact check.

I am amazed anyone can even consider voting for Donald Trump. It’s been proven he’s an idiot. He’s not a great negotiator. He’s not a great businessman. He didn’t build the formerly successful economy we had. He hasn’t rebuilt the military. He has totally bungled a pandemic with over 100,000 deaths which he does not care about. He has only expressed concern for himself.

And right now, Donald Trump can’t do anything about Twitter. But if he’s reelected, what’s stopping him? Today, Donald Trump is trying to be a dictator. If he’s still president in January 2021, he becomes a dictator and he’ll probably own Twitter by force.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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I Did NAZI That Spoiler Coming


cjones05032019

It’s bad enough that the internet is full of Russian trolls and idiots spreading conspiracy theories, but there are also people not just spreading hate, but motivating terrorism.

The white nationalist terrorists in Christchurch and Poway, California were frequent visitors to the online image board 8chan where they also shared their manifestos of hate.

I always thought it was terrible that conservative propaganda sites that pretend to be news like Breitbart and the Daily Callers are magnets for racists, conspiracy theorists, and just all-around stupid right-wing idiots.

8chan started after 4chan (another racist site) started cracking down on Gamergaters and child porn distributors. The board offers encouragement and cheerleading to white terrorists and graphically lionizes those who make good on their threats. The Poway synagogue shooter claimed he had been radicalized by 8chan in just 18 months. And the most dangerous thing you’ve had to avoid over the past week has been Avengers and Game of Throne spoilers. Me too.

The last time I saw a “hot” movie and posted about it, within minutes someone posted a spoiler in the comments. So, I don’t tell people on social media when I’ve seen a recently released movie (though I did see Avengers: Endgame Sunday night) because I don’t want people using me to drop spoilers. And, some people who drop spoilers don’t even realize they’re dropping a spoiler. But, ever since I stumbled upon the Force Awakens spoiler before I saw the film, any time I even see the title of something I don’t want spoiled, I keep scrolling as fast as I can without reading the rest of the sentence.

To steal my favorite quote from the TV show Scrubs, “People are bastard covered bastards with a bastard creme filling.”

But, at some point, you gotta go see the movie because you can’t expect people to sit on it forever. If you don’t know Bruce Willis has been dead all along in Sixth Sense, then that’s your own stupid fault. But, I do feel bad for when Willis eventually dies (hopefully, a very long time from now) because when someone posts a link to his obituary, someone’s going to think it’s a spoiler.

NOT a spoiler alert: I’m going out of town Thursday so you may not get a cartoon from me this Friday. So, you’re getting two today. But, it’s like leaving two bowls of dog food for the dog (hopefully, for the dog), he’s going to eat both immediately. So come Friday, you’ll probably still be waiting for a new cartoon. I’ve spoiled you.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

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The Morning After


cjones11072016

I am drawing for the days after the election. As I wrote yesterday, the window for election cartoons is closed. I still might do something on Jim Comey as that’ll probably be discussed beyond Tuesday.

I know you’re on Facebook. Everyone is on Facebook. I have friends whose dogs are on Facebook. Those dogs might be the only members of the social media community who haven’t unfriended someone over political beliefs.

There’s been a lot of talk about people unfriending and blocking others for disagreeing. I have seen people post “if you’re voting for Trump unfriend me now.” I think that’s extreme. Personally I want to know the arguments of people I disagree with, even the most hateful and vile people. I want to know what they’re saying. If they’re really stupid and engage in conspiracy theories I tend to ignore them. If there’s one good thing about social media and this election is that now you know which of your friends are racists. And to think before all this all you had were suspicions.

Despite my open mindedness toward people I disagree with I have had to block a few people. Not so much because they disagree but for other reasons. I blocked one person for constantly bombing my wall with memes and harassing my friends. I had to block a couple others for similar reasons. And I block people who tag me in those stupid Ray-Ban ads but that doesn’t count (someone once put a porn picture on my wall too which had to go). But usually I’m the one who is unfriended. I have been unfriended a lot. Conservative cartoonists have been unfriending me waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay before Donald Trump announced he was running for president. You name the cartoonist, yeah he’s probably unfriended and blocked me. In their defense I am kind of a jerk.

I have two sisters and neither are my friends on Facebook but in my defense they’re both insane (still love them). I’ve heard of a lot of other people who can’t talk to family members right now which makes me feel a little better (I still have my big brother, son, and several nieces and nephews who probably never read this blog). My best friend from high school, who is still married to the woman I introduced him to, has unfriended me (and I never even talked to him about this election). However, his wife is still my friend. A friend I’ve known for 16 years and who I helped move once unfriended me a couple days ago (he was always kind of a stupid baby about everything anyway. And he likes Nickelback so no big loss there). There’s probably a dozen others I’m not even aware of. At some point I’ll think of someone and wonder how come I never see their posts anymore and then figure it out. I didn’t even know one of my sisters had blocked me until the other texted to inform me (neener neener). But this election has brought me more readers, friends, and fans. I look forward to many years of annoying them.

To my Facebook friends who’ve argued with me and have remained mature enough not to unfriend, thank you. I’m sure we’ll bicker in the future. I don’t get angry or take it personal with stuff like that. I can argue with you and then share a sandwich together. A few of my Republican friends can vouch for that. One of them helped me set up this website and he knew I was going to use it to publish godless liberal cartoons drawn for heathens. He also fed me ribs that night. Nice guy.

But you know what? If you don’t want to talk to people you disagree with about politics then maybe you shouldn’t talk about politics. Don’t make political posts if you don’t want knuckleheads coming in and disagreeing with you. And if you don’t like seeing what your friends post, then don’t join the conversation. Move on with your life. Just keep scrolling. There are plenty of selfies, food and cat pictures on social media (which annoys me more than any pro Trump posts). Seriously, people. How come that crap hasn’t gotten old to you yet? I’m not interested in your fascination with your face, your cat, and unless you’re buying me lunch I really don’t need to see a picture of it.

But come Wednesday morning, call your mom. Call your dad. Call your crazy uncle. Call your brother. Call your sister. Well…you might wanna give the sisters a few more extra days (in my case, years). Actually, if they supported Trump they’re really not going to be in a good mood for a while so you might wanna give them a month….or two…..just forget it. They’ll call you.

Then buy them a sandwich.

Psst. There’s a few Easter eggs in this cartoon. Give yourself ten points if you can find one.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Time To Unfriend


cjones12172015

I made comments about making a Star Wars analogy this week but I honestly didn’t plan to. What do you know, I got one in anyway.

There’s been a social media trend over the past few weeks to ditch friends on social media who support Trump. I’ve seen posts stating “if you support Donald Trump then go ahead and unfriend me now.” A lot of people don’t have patience or tolerance for the Trump Trolls.

I think most people don’t like to hear anything they disagree with. But c’mon. It didn’t take Donald Trump to reveal which of your friends are bigots, racists, homophobic, xenophobic jerks.

Yes, it’s hard to tolerate someone who supports a candidate who runs a campaign like a school yard bully without any specifics. It’s hard to reason with someone who supports bigotry and can’t grasp nuance. But I take the position that it’s good to know which of my friends are idiots and support the total and complete destruction of the United States of America.

I’m not unfriending anyone for supporting Trump. It goes the other way too and if they’ve spent all these years tolerating my liberal views, which they hate, then I can put up with their being a troll. Well, at least the ones who haven’t blocked me yet.

Sloppy, hateful politics I can tolerate. If you spoil Star Wars for me I’ll kill you. Not literally, but in the virtual world I will do to you what Obi Wan Kenobi did to Darth Maul. Yes, I will chop you in half and drop you down a seemingly bottomless energy shaft on Naboo.

In fact, anytime I see “Star Wars” in a post I continue scrolling. I won’t finish reading the sentence. I will not read a review, no matter how bold the text claims it doesn’t contain spoilers. I’m going to see the movie anyway so no review can influence whether I see the movie or not. The bad thing is, I might be the last person to see the movie. I need to find a way to go into a Facebook/Twitter carbonite freeze until I see the movie.

Did you like this cartoon? Want to help a cartoonist make a living? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through Paypal. I need to buy pens, paper, sandwiches, and dog food. The starving cartoonist and his Beagle appreciates it. If you’ve donated in the past, THANK YOU!!!

Facebook Jumpers


cjones09292015

Of course I’m on Facebook. Isn’t everybody?

Facebook is very useful for me. I mostly use it to promote my cartoons but I get a lot of personal use out of it also. It’s great to stay in contact with friends from high school, old work colleagues I haven’t seen in 20 years, family members I haven’t seen in over a decade and people I still see in the real world. I also like to talk politics and argue with conservatives (to a point. You eventually realize that arguing with a conservative isn’t a fair fight as they’re ill equipped to deal with actual information).

I also like to turn it off sometimes and ignore it. That can be difficult as the settings on my phone make it beep every time I get an update on Facebook. But when I’m able to ignore it for eight hours or so I usually come back to about 50 notifications. That’s a good thing because it means people are reading my cartoons. They click the like button (I’m looking forward to the upcoming dislike button, by the way), leave comments and they share the cartoons, which gets shared by their friends which gets shared by their friends, etc.

Apparently Facebook went down Monday. I think it was the third time over the past month. I never noticed. All I noticed were posts informing me that it had gone down, which is like getting a phone call informing you that your phone is working.

People freak out when Facebook goes down. When I worked at The Free Lance-Star the human resources department decided one day that they should block Facebook from all the company computers. It took about four seconds for the entire newsroom to notice. It was like a wave at a sporting event. All down the newsroom heads were popping up from cubicles screaming about Facebook being down. It was a huge revolt. Facebook was unblocked within the hour. If only we could have rallied the troops as well to fight for restoring the pay they had cut, or hours, or our 401K, or our benefits, or our jobs. I’ve only seen a newsroom freak out to that extent over two other issues. Free food and an earthquake. The earthquake probably comes in third.

There’s also a couple of Facebook hoaxes currently making the rounds. If you’re on Facebook (and you are) you’re aware of it and may have fallen for it. I haven’t. I’m trained to be suspicious about everything. The new hoax is that you need to copy and paste some legal jargon or your photos and statuses will be less private. Don’t fall for it. Nothing is going to change the way everyone can see those selfies and cat pictures.

The other hoax is that you need to post the legalese to avoid being charged $9.10 to remain private.

 

One other thing, and it has to be true because I read it on the internet. More people are killed taking selfies than killed by sharks. So if you must take a selfie, do it with a shark.