National Security

Nyet Intelligence


It’s very hard to believe our intelligence agencies did not inform the president (sic) of the United States about Russia paying the Taliban bounties for killing American troops in Afghanistan.

Granted, if this was included in Donald Trump’s daily briefings, before they told him of this scheme by Putin, they’d have to explain where Afghanistan is, who the Taliban are, and repeat once again that Russia and Vladimir Putin are the fucking bad guys.

According to inside sources, the intel was included in his daily briefings. What’s being questioned now is whether it was read to him or just left in the written report for him to find it by himself…which would never happen. Just from the logistics of his rate of tweets and golf, when would he have the time to read? Plus, have you heard him read from a teleprompter? Reading is very difficult for him. If Donald Trump is going to hear about anything, it has to be on Fox or tweeted by a Nazi.

There is speculation the intelligence community had qualms about presenting this information to Donald Trump at all, which might be why it would be in the written report, knowing he’d never read it.

No president has had as many former staffers as Donald Trump has who tell us he’s really bad at this stuff. What kind of stuff? The kind of stuff that involves foreign policy and intelligence. You know…presidenting.

But, the other major concern is Donald Trump would share this information with Putin. And, that’s not just a silly concern that can be easily pushed aside. Donald Trump has given Russians classified information in the past. He’s tweeted classified information in the past.

Shortly after taking office, Donald Trump invited Russians into the Oval Office, allowed their press with their recording equipment in, and kicked out the American press. There, Donald Trump gave the Russian ambassador and essentially their Foreign Minister (their Secretary of State) intelligence about a planned operation by ISIS in Syria. What’s even worse is, it wasn’t our intelligence. It was given to us by Israel. Donald Trump betrayed the American intelligence community, our allies fighting with us in Syria against ISIS, and our allies. Did he do it to commit treason? No. He did it out of stupidity. He is subservient to Russia and was trying to show off. As our Secretary of State at that time said, he’s a fucking moron.

A top European diplomat said Trump’s sharing of classified information with Russia would force them to stop sharing information with us because sharing intel with Americans while Trump is president (sic) could put their sources at risk.

A member of Germany’s intelligence agency said if Trump “passes this information to other governments at will, then Trump becomes a security risk for the entire western world.”

When Donald Trump met with Vladimir Putin at a global conference, he went out of his schedule for an impromptu chat with the Russian totalitarian without anyone from our side with him. He relied on Putin’s translator. He didn’t bring a U.S. translator or anyone to take notes.

When he had an official meeting with Putin in Finland (which is NOT a part of Russia as he believed), he kicked all U.S. personnel out of the room except an American interpreter. After the meeting, he confiscated the interpreter’s notes. Why didn’t he want anyone to know what he and Putin talked about? Maybe they talked about that penthouse Trump offered to Putin during the 2016 presidential campaign in an effort to construct a Trump Tower in Moscow. Maybe he talked about Russia’s meddling in 2016. Maybe he talked about their meddling in 2020. Maybe he got all his ideas about Ukraine and Democrats from that meeting. Maybe they talked about the pee tape.

And, when he and Putin addressed the press, he took Putin’s side over American intelligence about whether or not Russia attacked our elections.

In 2017, he told the president of the Philippines, Rodrigo Duterte, another fascist, the location of two U.S. nuclear submarines off the coast of North Korea. This information is so tight that normally the only people who know for certain the submarines’ locations are the captains of those submarines.

After the bombing of a concert in Manchester in the United Kingdom in 2017, Trump leaked to the press details of the case, the main suspect, and even images of the bomb used. The British government was pissed as it compromised their case and British police said they would stop passing information to their U.S. counterparts.

Last year, Donald Trump tweeted an image of an Iranian missile that had been damaged from an explosion during takeoff. What this image revealed were our highly classified surveillance capabilities to take such a photo.

This is why I’m sure there are no dead alien bodies at Roswell. Donald Trump would have tweeted out photos. Also, we still don’t know who killed JFK because Trump would have shared that too. Unless our intelligence isn’t giving that information to Trump.

The information on Putin’s bounties was passed to our British allies, who we can trust more than the American president (sic). If the British got it from us, then it was made available to Donald Trump, but they may not have pointed it out to him.

It’s a sickening thought that Donald Trump is president (sic) and classified information protecting this nation is given to him. It’s sickening he can declassify anything he wants as president (sic). It’s sickening he has the nuclear football which he allows Mar-a-Lago guests to pose with. It’s sickening that one time, he actually held an intelligence briefing with guests present at Mar-a-Lago. Seriously. He did that.

The funny thing is, everyone who complained about Hillary’s server have never expressed concern over Trump’s leaky treasonous mouth.

Our allies don’t want to share classified information with us. Our intelligence network, who Trump has attacked and rebuked and sided with Putin over, doesn’t want to share intelligence with the president of the United States (sic).

That’s because Donald Trump is a national security risk.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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It’s not just for the president’s safety that his security is of the utmost importance. You may be saying, “But, Clay…what’s the point of keeping freaks away from Trump when he chooses to surround himself with freaks and is himself, an Adderall-riddled lunatic?” True, Trump keeps company and appoints a consortium of slimeballs, grifters, fucknuts, and shitweasels. But, we have to take national security seriously, even if the president doesn’t and even sells it to the highest bidder.

The Secret Service needs to do everything in its power to protect Donald Trump from physical harm. Do you really want the man to become a martyr and spend the rest of your life listening to sycophants’ conspiracy theories? You know they’d say Obama did it. The other thing is where Donald Trump goes, so does national security. For the Secret Service, he makes their extremely difficult job even harder by lounging at a resort.

Last weekend, during Donald Trump’s 77th presidential golf trip, a Chinese woman carrying four cellphones, a hard drive, a laptop, and a malware-infected thumb drive was arrested at Trump’s pompous Florida golf resort, Mar-a-Lago. She got through the Secret Service by claiming she was there to swim and attend an event that was not happening. She didn’t even have a swimsuit but she was loaded with recording devices like a Russian photographer invited into the Oval Office. It was a staffer of the club who caught her. The most shocking revelation out of this is that Trump actually hired someone smart enough to catch it.

Trump blew off the incident by calling it a fluke because the fault of this doesn’t just lie with the Secret Service. It falls on him too. First, he doesn’t vacation at a home, compound, or ranch like previous presidents. He has to visit a club so hundreds of people can fawn over him, tell him his hands aren’t really that small, and listen to him talk about how smart he is. He likes to crash weddings at his club.

The second problem is, he invites access to him. The club sells memberships by winking to members that they’ll have access to the president and his family. This is selling access. The club doubled their membership fees after Trump was elected. If you’re a Russian, Chinese, or Saudi Arabian spy, part of your budget will be purchasing a membership to one of his clubs.

The third problem is, Trump is careless with national security. He doesn’t follow guidelines for using secure phones as he thinks that’s too much of a hassle. He hands out security clearances to grifters and family members (I know. Redundant) like they’re Skittles. His son-in-law, who got a security clearance from Trump after being rejected by the FBI, talks to the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia through WhatsApp. Trump hands over classified information to Russians in the Oval Office that we received from allies. He even held a meeting on strikes on Syria at Mar-a-Lago in front of guests while they were looking over his shoulders, taking photos with their cellphones, and tweeting those photos. Once, he allowed guests to pose with the nuclear football.

Donald Trump is a national security risk.

People who negotiate with Trump understand he’s a flake who surrenders. He surrendered on the shutdown, his threat to end Obamacare, and his threat to close the border. Just like negotiators, spies know all they have to do to run surveillance on the president is to go after his phones and buy a club membership. He’ll even take a selfie with the spy. This is a man whose campaign invited Russians into their headquarters. They don’t tell spies to go away and they don’t call the FBI when they show up.

It helps our foreign adversaries that the president of the United States is an idiot who’s a sucker for ego gratification. Everyone knows how to play him which is through parades, sword dances, and fake blondes who look like his daughter.

The Secret Service needs to protect Trump from spies by protecting Trump from himself. When they protect Trump, they’re protecting us. Now, if only they’d protect us from Trump.

Confession: My biggest influences are the work of Sergio Aragones and Don Martin from Mad Magazine. But, Spy vs Spy, which is a very famous feature of Mad, never did anything for me. If you don’t hate me yet you will after I tell you that I never dug the fold-in back cover either.

However, I do enjoy drawing the Spies from Spy vs Spy. They’re easy.

Be Complicit

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