MLK

Give Us The Ballot


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Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell lives in an alternate reality where principles, hypocrisy, irony, and lying your ass off only apply to Democrats. If a Republican changes his mind and does the exact thing he railed on and on against previously, then you’re not supposed to remember that. In fact, they laugh about it. Gotcha!

Currently, the Senate is split between Republicans and Democrats, 50/50. Democrats control the chamber with the vote of the vice-president, Kamala Harris. But to pass anything, you need more than 51 votes. To pass any legislation, like Build Back Better or the Voting Rights Act, you need 60 votes. President Biden and Majority Leader Chuck Schumer want to change this. McConnell warns that changing this will destroy the Senate or some shit like that. The guy is adamantly against a 51 vote for anything…except for giving someone a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court.

McConnell is against changing Senate rules except when he’s for it. He changed the rules from a 60-votes-requirement to confirm a Supreme Court justice to a mere 51. Do you know how many of Trump’s three justices got 60 votes? None, because it’s really hard for lunatics, religious zealots, and rapists to get 60 votes for a lifetime appointment to the highest court in the land. If a person can’t get 60 votes, then that person doesn’t belong on the highest court in the nation. The judges of Top Chef are stricter with their voting requirements than Republicans are for lifetime appointments.

Donald Trump had three opportunities to nominate someone who was not a maniac, and three times he failed. Donald Trump shouldn’t be allowed to make his own selection from McDonald’s kids’ menu less enough three Supreme Court appointments. Call me a radical, but I believe every appointment Donald Trump made that’s still in office should be removed. Vladimir Putin shouldn’t have any influence on our government. At the very least, those three fuckers Trump and McConnell put on the Supreme Court will forever have asterisks by their names.

Also, the majority of this nation was not in favor of these three appointments. A minority of voters put Trump in the White House and Republicans in charge of the Senate. Now, three people have lifetime appointments on the Supreme Court courtesy of the whims of the most ignorant, dumbest, and racist people in this nation. This is like when you and your spouse have to eat Burger King because your kid in the backseat won’t stop screaming for nuggies.

McConnell pretends that Senate rules are sacred…until he needs to change one. In 2016, he refused to give President Barack Obama’s last Supreme Court pick a hearing based on the bullshit argument that Supreme Court justices can’t be confirmed during an election year. Then in less than two months before election day in 2020, he rammed through the confirmation of Amy Coney Barrett, a true religious cultist onto the Supreme Court.

People like Joe Manchin warn that if Democrats change the filibuster rule now, then Republicans will change rules too if they resume control. But you don’t even have to be a good student of history to know they’re going to do that anyway. Duh. Democrats have got to stop letting Republicans fuck them. Look what they did with the Supreme Court.

During President Biden’s speech on voting rights, he compared those who oppose election reform to believers in racial segregation and rebels in the Civil War. He compared Republicans to Jefferson Davis, Bull Connor, and George Wallace. Despite it being a very accurate portrayal, or because of that, McConnell got his Depends into a twist and referred to President Biden’s speech as a “rant” that was “incoherent, incorrect, and beneath his office”.

Then McConnell accused President Biden of being “unpresidential” which is very interesting coming from the guy who slobbered all over the shoes of Mr. Grab-Them-By-The-Pussy for four years.

Yesterday, I saw a cartoon from a conservative using Dr. Martin Luther King Jr to make an argument for voter suppression. I always find it interesting when racists quote or use MLK for their racism as if they actually support what Dr. King stood for. But then again, they call themselves Christians while supporting throwing immigrant babies into cages.

The thing is, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr never supported voter suppression. This seems like a dumb thing to have to point out, but when racists co-opt a civil rights leader for their racist policies, I’m gonna have to point it out. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr spent his entire life fighting for voting rights and equality. There was this whole big thing about it in the 1950s and 1960s. I swear. But, Republicans, you don’t have to take it from me. Take it from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

In his speech, “Give us the Ballot,” Dr. King said, “The denial of this sacred right is a tragic betrayal of the highest mandates of our democratic tradition. And so our most urgent request to the president of the United States and every member of Congress is to give us the right to vote.”

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr argued for the ballot, not for ballots being taken away. He didn’t want laws that banned people from handing out water to voters in line. He didn’t want a law where legislatures can overrule election boards. He didn’t want laws that allowed legislatures to overturn an election if they don’t like the results. He didn’t campaign for new laws that made it harder for non-white voters to vote. Not even once. He never said, “I have a dream where all ballot boxes are removed from black-majority voting precincts and all dropoffs are banned on Sundays. And he never said we need “voting integrity” based on a bunch of bullshit lies spread by Rudy Giuliani.

I believe every Republican in the Senate should read Dr. King’s speech again. Wait? Again? I mean, for the first time.

Music note: While drawing this cartoon, I listened to some M.I.A, The Fray, Norah Jones, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, and Franz Ferdinand.

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Hey, Hey, Hater Kansas City


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I know from the history of this website that I have readers who don’t watch football. I know. Crazy. I once had a reader tell me I should go into more depth to explain who Tom Brady is. But anyway, let me give the backstory to this.

Fans of the Kansas City Chiefs are racist assholes. There. Backstory done.

No? OK. I’ll provide more information.

In case you’re a Republican, Kansas City, where the Chiefs of the National Football League play, is in Missouri. It’s not in Kansas like Donald Trump believes. Seriously. But anyway, Thursday night was the kickoff to the new NFL season. While most game won’t have fans in attendance, the Chiefs allowed about 17,000 into the 60,000 plus stadium to watch the game. And during a moment of unity, the fans booed.

What? Who boos unity? Apparently, Kansas City boos unity.

Let’s get something straight here. To believe in unity is to believe in peace. To believe we’re all equal and should have the same civil rights, opportunities, and equality is not a crazy Democratic Party, radical-left, foie gras-eating, Birkenstock-wearing, long-haired hippy, commie ideal. It shouldn’t be political to believe we should all get along. It shouldn’t be partisan to think our children should live in a world where they’ll never experience hate directed at them.

After it was announced that in addition to the national anthem being performed before the game, that “Lift Every Voice and Sing,” considered to be the black national anthem, would also be performed, conservatives became outraged. How weird is that? If they weren’t told it was the black national anthem, they would have been fine with it. I’ll bet you a hairy nickel they wouldn’t have been outraged if the song being added was “Sweet Home, Alabama.”

Basically, these people are saying they’re done with the NFL because the league wants to be nice to black people. Donald Trump yells it’s why the ratings are going down.

Before, these jerks were outraged at Colin Kaepernick for kneeling during the national anthem and lied claiming he was disrespecting our troops when he was really taking a knee for equality and against racism and oppression.

Donald Trump, the leader of the racist conservative asshole movement in the United States doesn’t believe white privilege or systemic racism exists and that anyone who does has “drank the Kool-Aid.”

But in Kansas City, they took it a step further by booing unity. When the players of both teams locked arms for a moment of silence, it wasn’t silent. The crowd booed. Conservatives aren’t happy with loud protests or silent protests. So, when can we protest against racism? Oh, never? Yeah, that’s it. Donald Trump teargassed a peaceful crowd for protesting racism.

The Chiefs fans didn’t boo kneeling during the national anthem. They didn’t boo a statement like, “Defund the police.” They didn’t boo a giant picture of George Floyd. They didn’t boo the organization Black Lives Matter. They didn’t boo someone saying, “Black lives matter.” They booed equality. They booed peace. You would have thought from the boos that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was singing “Say It Loud, I’m Black and I’m Proud” while burning a pile of cheeseburgers and standing on an American flag.

But no, These fuckers were booing something anti-racist. It’s like they’re saying, “Hey, we’ll keep our racism, thank you very much.”

Booing unity is like booing puppies, tacos, and sandwiches. Puppies, tacos, and sandwiches are awesome. Everybody likes puppies, tacos, and sandwiches. But then again, the leader of the racist conservative asshole movement doesn’t like puppies, eats his tacos in a bowl, and only eats sandwiches from McDonald’s.

Last year, I was very happy for the coach of the Chiefs, Andry Reid. They won the Super Bowl and it was a long time coming for the old coach. I think Patrick Mahomes is the best quarterback in the league and he’s an awesome kid. But, I will be rooting against the Chiefs this year. I’m not so much rooting against the Chiefs as I am against Chiefs fans.

You booed unity, Kansas City. What the hell is wrong with you to boo unity?

Boo, Chiefs fans. They’re a bunch of racist jerks.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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Hater Dreams


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How long will a racist spend at the Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial when forced to go? About two minutes.

I can relate. It’s like going to a party you don’t want to go to, or has often been my case in the past, a band’s show. But, you feel you need to make an appearance, so you show up for a little while, engage one or two people in conversations, have a drink, then cut out. If you’re lucky, enough people will have seen you to say you were indeed there in case anyone asks. I mean, how many times do you need to hear the same band cover “Dirty Deeds?”

Normally, when you make the obligatory appearance, it takes longer than two minutes. That’s about how long Donald Trump and Mike Pence spent at the Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial in Washington yesterday on MLK Day. In their defense, it was cold, nobody was selling hamberders, and they’re racists.

While Democrats fanned out to public events across the nation to commemorate the holiday, the prez and his veep were in and out of the memorial faster than Mike and Karen Pence discovering they had accidentally walked into a gay wedding.

Mike Pence also commemorated the holiday the day before by comparing Donald Trump to MLK.  While on CBS’s Face the Nation, Pence said, “One of my favorite quotes from Dr. King was ‘Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy.’ King inspired us to change through the legislative process, to become a more perfect union. That’s exactly what President Trump is calling on Congress to do.”

Seriously, if Dr. King inspired you to use legislation to create medieval, racist, vanity projects, I don’t think you were listening very closely.

Certainly, Dr. King didn’t inspire Mike’s wife, Karen, to take a job at an anti-LGBT Christian school as an art teacher. Pence is upset over criticism his wife is receiving for teaching at the school that seeks to exclude homosexual and transgender students and staff members because of their “moral misconduct.” How dare people not tolerate their intolerance. If this teaching gig doesn’t work out, she can always apply at Catholic Covington where the students wear black-face at basketball games.

The good news is Pence oozes tolerance when it comes to worshiping a deity who paid hush money to porn stars. He’s a 19th century kind of guy.

What shouldn’t be tolerated is Pence comparing Dr. King to a man who sought to disavow the nation’s first black president with a racist birther theory, was slow to disavow David Duke, protested the removal of “beautiful Confederate monuments,” and approved of the “very fine people” marching with neo-Nazis in Charlottesville.

Trump was a young man during the Civil Rights movement. While Dr. King was protesting the Vietnam War, Trump was avoiding it by claiming he had bone spurs.

While Dr. King said he hopes there comes a day when his children are not “judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character,” Trump said his daughter has “got the best body” and if he wasn’t her father then he’d probably be dating her.

Dr. King won the Nobel Peace Prize. Trump can’t spell “Nobel Peace Prize.”

Dr. King donated his Nobel prize money to charity. Trump steals from charity.

Dr. King was Time Magazine’s Man of the Year. Trump hangs fake Time Magazine covers of himself in his snooty golf resorts.

Dr. King was defined by civil disobedience and was arrested for it 29 times. Trump says “fire that son of a bitch” when an NFL athlete protests and there should be limits on a free press.

Dr. King said, “We must build dikes of courage to hold back the flood of fear.” Donald Trump says, “Build the wall.”

One of these men inspired millions to fight for Civil Rights and equality. The other inspires millions to hate and oppress. One of these men asked America to open its mind and the other is telling us to close it.

MLK had a dream to make this nation better. Trump has a dream to make it worse and to get away with Russian collusion, obstruction of justice, tax fraud, and maybe dating his daughter. I don’t want to get in that head.

Mike Pence should stop the comparisons of Trump and Martin Luther King Jr. unless he’s pointing out that one was one of the greatest men in American history and the other is one of the most vilest persons to ever command a podium.

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