LGBTQ

Abnormal Texas


I hope someday Texas evolves beyond the Republican Party because the diversity in that state grows on a daily basis while the GOP keeps regressing. And as far-right and as out of touch as national Republicans are, Texas Republicans are even worse. And I hope Texas outgrows the GOP before the GOP makes it illegal for nonwhites to vote, which they’re working on.

Texas Republicans are the Texas Taliban. Just like the Taliban, they want to control women, condemn homosexuality, and govern by religious dogma. Don’t believe me? Check out the new state party platform the Texas fucknuts devised over the weekend.

Texas Republicans had their convention over the weekend in Houston. Texas Republicans are so far right that they booed Texas Republicans. They booed their Senator, John Cornyn, for working with Democrats on gun legislation (that doesn’t even touch guns) and they booed Texas Republican congressman Dan Crenshaw.

Alex Stein is a conservative comedian which means he’s not funny. Case in point: He thinks calling a guy who lost an eye while fighting in a war who he perceives as being a RINO (Republican in name only) “Eyepatch McCain.” Maybe Stein isn’t that creative as he’s just repeating a nickname Tucker Carlson came up with, but Stein was there. Support our troops, eh, Republicans?

This is why conservatives make lousy comedians. They’re not funny and they don’t even understand they’re supposed to write their own material. C’mon, they’re not conservative political cartoonists.

There was a scuffle between Crenshaw’s security tean and Stein and his goons. Crenshaw later tweeted, “This is what happens when angry little boys like @alexstein99 don’t grow up and can’t get girlfriends…” Damn. Crenshaw is funnier than the conservative comedian. I expect conservative comedian Stein to retort with, “Oh yeah? Well…you’re the one who can’t get a girlfriend. High five!”

But back to this platform. You’re going to love it never at all.

Among the proposals for the platform is that President Biden was NOT legitimately elected. Yes, they want to make their fucked-up conspiracy theories an official part of their platform. I’m shocked they’re not inserting shit into their platform about Hugo Chavez, Italian satellites, and bamboo ballots. Did I just give them some ideas?

They didn’t allow Log Cabin Republicans to have a booth at the convention as their platform is now declaring homosexuality an “abnormal lifestyle choice” while it’s not “abnormal” or a “choice.” The only thing I can see abnormal about gay Republicans is that they’re gay Republicans. Why the fuck do they want to be in a party that hates them? I don’t understand this the same way I don’t understand why any blacks would vote Republican.

I used to say the same thing about Republicans who claim to be patriots yet support a fascist movement until I realized they’re lying about the patriot part.

Other goodies in the new platform oppose efforts to classify carbon dioxide as a pollutant, repeal the 16th Amendment (which established the income tax), and bring prayer back into public schools, courthouses, and public buildings.

The platform supports abolishing abortion and recognizing life begins at fertilization before anything has entered the womb. It gets crazier. They want to mandate that Texas students “learn about the humanity of the preborn child,” in part by forcing students to listen to ultrasounds of gestating fetuses. That’s some real Taliban shit there.

The platform is also calling for ending the 1965 Voting Rights Act which Republicans nationally are doing anyway but calling it “voting integrity” in order not to say the racist quiet part out loud. In Texas, they say the racist quiet part out loud.

You can say this is just a bunch of crazy right-wing oppressive Texans who don’t represent any national movement, but I’ll retort with a “n’yuh-uh.” National Republicans are NOT condemning or speaking out against this platform. They’re going to sit back and see how well it goes over.

When Texas banned abortions and legalized posses to round up abortion doctors and anyone driving a woman to get an abortion, other Republican states started to follow their lead. Mississippi, Missouri, Florida, Oklahoma, Afghanistan, etc… They’re all following these goons.

And after the Supreme Court allows them to ban abortion, other states are going to ban abortion. What’s going to happen after the Supreme Court allows them to put prayer back in school, ignore pollution, repeal all taxes, ban gays, and finally, make it illegal for nonwhites to vote? Other yee-haw states will follow.

Republicans are racist. They have racist policies. They’re backward with women and gay rights. And they’re a bunch of religious zealots. This Texas Republican platform is the mood for the national Republican Party. It’s not that Texas Republicans are abnormal. All Republicans are abnormal.

Texas is just saying all the hateful and regressive parts out loud.

Music Note: I listened to a 90s alt mix while drawing today.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

The Madison Cawthorn Horror Picture Show


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Madison Cawthorn is one of those Republican assholes who champions toxic masculinity. One of his major concerns as a United States congressman, other than pushing debunked conspiracy theories, is the ongoing threat to masculinity. He’s expressed public concern that men aren’t manly enough. He’s probably a big fan of Tucker Carlson’s ball-tanning theory.

Last year, Madison Cawthorn said, “our culture today is trying to completely de-masculate (sic) all of the young men they don’t want people who are going to stand up”.
Calling out to mothers, who he said are the “most vicious” conservatives, “If you are raising a young man, please raise them to be a monster”.
Cawthorn accused liberal politicians of “trying to make everyone genderless, sexless, and just absolutely Godless”, and declared Americans “want our culture back, and if you want to stand in the way of that, we will run you over.”

On the floor of the House, Cawthorn accused Democrats of waging a “war on biology,” saying, “Your left-wing movement is forcing children to endure radical expressions of sexuality. And yet, you can’t even define what a woman is. You might amend the bill, but you’ll never amend biology.”

In a podcast, he said, “I think that we have bred a generation of soft men and that generation has created a lot of problems in our society and our culture designed to reclaim and restore masculinity in a society that is ever more dismissive of what it means to be a man.”

I would totally respect Madison Cawthorn if he had made any of those statements while wearing lingerie.

There’s nothing wrong with being a cross-dresser. It doesn’t freak me out nearly as much as Civil War reenactors. Being a cross-dresser is not a sign of your sexual affiliation. You can be straight or gay as a cross-dresser. Though you may not fit the conventional image, you can be as manly as the next guy, even if you’re a cross-dresser. I don’t care if you do that. You do you and more power to you for it. I respect people who are who they want to be. What I don’t respect are hypocrites.

Photos have emerged of Madison Cawthorn wearing lingerie at what appears to be a party, though I’m sure it’s not one of those “orgies” he claimed Washington Republicans have been inviting him to.

Politico, the news outlet that obtained the photos, said it couldn’t verify the legitimacy, but Cawthorn sent out a tweet that did.

Cawthorn tweeted, “I guess the left thinks goofy vacation photos during a game on a cruise (taken waaay before I ran for Congress) is going to somehow hurt me? They’re running out of things to throw at me… Share your most embarrassing vacay pics in the replies.”

Cawthorn is blaming the “left” for finding the photos and he’s trying to change the subject. It’s like saying, “Yeah, that’s me wearing women’s panties in that picture but speaking of pictures, did you see that Bears game last night?”

The hypocrisy here is that in his campaign to be the youngest and stupidest member of Congress, he has championed himself as the Christian candidate. Politico wrote that he “has staked his political persona on arch-traditional Christian principles and the insistence of the importance of a kind of hypermasculinity.”

Madison is talking too much about masculinity the same way Tucker’s talking too much about testicles. There’s nothing wrong with that, but don’t claim you’re a champion of heterosexuality then try to have a two-hour conversation with your best friend about ball sacks. The extent of one man talking to another about testicles shouldn’t last longer than saying, “how’s it hanging?” That’s a rhetorical question, by the way.

This is just another embarrassing reason for Republicans to ditch Cawthorn, which is something they want to do. The Republican Party wants Madison Cawthorn defeated and out of Congress. He’s from a conservative district in North Carolina so their numbers in the House won’t be threatened. Plus, Ron DeSantis is drawing congressional maps that will more than make up the loss of Cawthorn’s seat if it actually does go to a Democrat.

But while the Qanon fucknut base loves Madison, as he’s fed their crazy conspiracies about election fraud and pedophiles, the party leadership wants him out and they’re putting money into it.

A super PAC affiliated with North Carolina Senator Thom Tillis just dumped over $300,000 into a new ad targeting Cawthorn titled, “Madison Cawthorn’s Lies.” The video calls Cawthorn an “attention-seeking embarrassment” to the Republican Party. It goes on to say, “Madison Cawthorn lies for the limelight,” and “Cawthorn will lie about anything.” This is from his own party.

Madison is an embarrassment on the same level as Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lauren Boebert, and Matt Gaetz, who may have given Cawthorn the lingerie as a gift. They kinda have their own little caucus of right-wing flame throwers engaged in conspiracy theories while having no interest in actual legislation. In fact, Cawthorn told his Republican colleagues he’d rather be a messenger than a legislator writing, “I have built my staff around comms rather than legislation.”

But stuff like visiting Hitler’s vacation home, referring to him as the “Fuhrer,” and saying it was something on his bucket list might appeal to the goose-steppers who attacked the Capitol for Trump, but it’s not the attention the leadership wants. Neither does creating a website attacking a journalist by accusing him of leaving academia “to work for non-white males, like Cory Booker, who aims to ruin white males running for office.” Calling Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky a “thug” at the start of Russia’s invasion doesn’t help either. But what probably pushed Republicans like Thom Tillis over the edge were the orgy claims.

Last month, Cawthorn went on a podcast and talked about “the sexual perversion that goes on in Washington.” He claimed he’s been invited to Washington orgies and has even seen lawmakers snort cocaine. House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy and Minority Whip Steve Scalise met with Cawthorn for a private scolding. McCarthy later told reporters that Cawthorn admitted to him and Scalise that he had lied. McCarthy said, “He changes what he tells and that’s not becoming of a congressman. He did not tell the truth and that’s unacceptable.” McCarthy said he had told Cawthorn that “He’s lost my trust. He’s going to have to earn it back.”

McCarthy also claimed to his colleagues he told Donald Trump that he bore responsibility for the white nationalist terrorist attack on the Capitol and that Trump had accepted it, and then later claimed no such conversation ever happened before audio recordings revealed he did tell his colleagues that.

Cawthorn is a liar, but so is McCarthy. None of these goons have my trust.

Republicans don’t mind if you lie. They only mind if you lie about the wrong things. It’s almost as bad as telling the truth. They hate that.

Being a cross-dresser might be the one redeeming value of Madison Cawthorn. Everything else about the guy is vile horse excrement that even flies avoid and his constituents should want better. If they continue to vote for this slime in lingerie and wheels, they don’t deserve better.

Cross-dressing is fine, but don’t talk about a “war on biology” and your manly manliness while wearing your mom’s panties.

Creative note: I actually learned about this issue from yesterday’s blog. One of you guys left a comment surprised that I didn’t do a cartoon on it. First, I published yesterday’s blog before Politico reported the story. Second, thank you. Do you know how often I learn of news from the comments? Never. Sure, I would have heard of this sometime today, but it was nice to get a jump on it.

Music Note: I was watching CNN while drawing this so no cartoon music today. However, I did have “Sweet Transvestite” from the Rocky Horror Picture Show stuck in my head during this. I actually went to a showing of Rocky Horror back in the 80s. No, I didn’t dress up.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Jesus Has Two Daddies


As I was scrolling through my news feeds yesterday, I came across a cartoon by one of my conservative colleagues. It was his annual Easter cartoon. It was smart of him to post it a few days early so his clients will have time to put it on their Easter Sunday opinion pages. Their Christian readers will be so pleased. But I have an issue with it.

I’ve explained this before but I’ll repeat it. I’m agnostic. I don’t consider myself a full-fledged atheist because we don’t know anything about what happens after we die. Neither the Pope nor Neil DeGrasse Tyson are experts on life after death. I believe claiming you know what happens after this mortal life kinda makes a person an obnoxious asshole. You can say, “I believe,” but when you say that you know, you’re teaching something you don’t know anything about. We are all ignorant about this. So, I’m agnostic.

I don’t have an issue with the Easter cartoons because I don’t agree with them. I disagree with a lot of things that get published by news outlets but that doesn’t mean I don’t think they should be published. Part of my disagreement is the Christian fundamentalism being spread by newspapers. I hate to see journalistic institutions treat myths as established facts. Also, it discriminates against non-Christian readers. Are the Christians the only readers editors want? I did have a Catholic editor at my last employer tell me once that Catholics should receive special treatment from our newspaper, which he told me after the newspaper published an apology for a cartoon of mine that really pissed off Catholics.

While I don’t know what happens after we die, I am pretty positive there never was a Jesus Christ. By that, I’m open to the idea there may have been a non-white guy running around in a robe about 600 years ago preaching peace and love and was murdered for it. But I don’t believe he was the son of a god. I don’t believe he rose from the grave three days later. Who wrote the Bible, George Romero? I don’t believe anything in the Bible is true. Keep in mind that I’ve read a lot of the Bible (not the entire thing because the prose is ridiculous). I grew up as a Christian and even attended a private Baptist school for a year in Georgia against my will. It was horrible. But, I know where these people are coming from. I know the culture. I know what they preach. Little did I know as a child that I was doing research for my future career.

So, while I am not a Christian or believe in Jesus, I believe in the message of peace, tolerance, being nice to people, and not judging or looking down on others (not that I’m good at following the message because I look down on a lot of people). I’m with Jesus’ anti-hate agenda. So, this is why I have a problem with these Easter cartoons.

My right-wing colleagues spend the entire year pushing a hate agenda. They support the racism of Donald Trump and Tucker Carlson. They’re on board with the hate and discrimination of Greg Abbott and Ron DeSantis. They defend the white nationalists who tried to destroy our democracy and install an unelected orange racist potentate. Now, if you disagree with them on their hate agenda, they’ll accuse you of being a pedophile. A pedophile. Where did this shit come from? Why is this allowed? They get upset if you call them a racist when they do racist shit but can accuse us of raping children because we don’t like their legislation? I call bullshit on this. Anyone who calls another person a “groomer” on social media should have their accounts deleted and be banned from the platform. Over the past week, I’ve been called “groomer” on Truth Social and Instagram repeatedly for pointing out their hate. I’ll be called that again for this cartoon.

So, after spending an entire year hating on people, these right-wing goosestepping talking point fascist-loving racist assholes wanna preach Jesus to us. They pause from shaming children to tell us “He has risen.” Screw you and the white horse you rode in on.

First off, they’re bad political cartoonists. This is opinion journalism that should be used to punch up, not down. We’re supposed to go after those in power, not the weak who they attack. When I first got into this business, Dick Locher, a Pulitzer-Prize-winning cartoonist who also drew Dick Tracy, told me that political cartoonists watch the battle and when it’s over, go down and shoot the wounded. It’s a good line and Dick Locher was a great guy, but he was wrong. We shoot the winners. Right-wing cartoonists go after the victims. When Donald Trump says “Send them back” or Ron DeSantis points his bony racist finger at kids and scolds them for wearing face masks while calling them “ridiculous,” my right-wing colleagues yee-haw over it.

Second, they’re hypocrites. They don’t see their own hypocrisy by teaching and supporting hate all year then drawing a cartoon about Jesus. Do they believe when they spread hate that they’re spreading love? Do they believe Jesus would support bullying children or throwing them into cages? Maybe their inability to understand love comes from their love of hate. They support legislation banning schools from talking about having two daddies while going to Sunday school where they preach about their savior who had two daddies. What would Jesus do? He probably wouldn’t force a 13-year-old girl to have her rapist uncle’s baby.

So, to all those right-wing hypocrites drawing Easter cartoons praising a guy who doesn’t support their hate agenda, this cartoon is for you. If you can use Jesus for your hate, I can use him to take you and your hate down. The bad thing is most newspapers would rather publish their religious zealotry than my cartoon attacking hate.

You MAGAts have and always will be on the wrong side of history. If you were alive in the early 1860s, you would have fought to preserve slavery and divide our nation. If you were around during the 1940s, you would have been Nazis. If you were around in the 1950s and 1960s, you would have fought against the Civil Rights movement. You were here when Russia offered you a racist stupid orange shitgibbon as president, and you took it.

And if you were around 2,000 years ago, you wouldn’t have been following Jesus. You would have been the Romans nailing him to a cross.

Music note: I listened to The Black Keys while drawing this cartoon because I’m a lonely boy.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Canning Caitlyn On The Can


I did something weird last night. I watched Fox News. More specifically, I watched Tucker Carlson. Granted, it was only for about five minutes, with three of those probably being commercials. But still, I watched Fox News.

I have YouTube TV and when I scroll through the channels, the first ones that pop up are those I frequent the most, like CNN, MSNBC, BBC…and yeah…that’s about it except during football season. That’s not all I watch as I also have streaming services, but yeah…on actual television, I mostly only watch news shows. So it actually took some scrolling before I could even find Fox News. And when I found it, it was time for Tucker.

I jumped in while Tucker was talking to some goon about “wokeness” and the damage it was having on the nation, how Democrats were going to pay dearly for it, and how it’s just a bunch of fear-mongering from the left as striking fear into people is all the left has. Tucker, who’s spent years warning on the danger of the Great Replacement theory kept a straight face during this discussion about using fear tactics.

Then, Tucker was about to go to commercials but promised when he came back, he’d give a report on CNN finally admitting Hunter Biden’s laptop is a thing. So after sitting through commercials for prostate medication and buying gold and silver, Tucker came back and delivered on his promise to expose CNN and make them look like hypocrites. Tucker explained he was going to show clips of CNN attacking the reports on Hunter’s laptop and then show more recent clips of CNN finally realizing the legitimacy of Hunter’s laptop. Tucker had to explain to his viewers that’s what they were seeing because it’s not what he showed.

What he showed was an old clip of a CNN anchor talking about how Rudy Giuliani can’t be trusted for information and that the right is using Russian propaganda. He then showed a recent clip of another CNN anchor talking about the investigation into Hunter Biden. Neither clip mentioned the laptop. But, Tucker was there to tell us they talked about the laptop they weren’t talking about.

During the few minutes I watched, Tucker never talked about the importance or relevance of this laptop. If you actually pay attention, conservative media has not been telling you anything specific about the laptop that makes it criminal or evil. It’s legal to own a laptop. Good people own laptops. Churches have laptops. Why I bet even people at Fox News own laptops. So, what is it then? Oh, the emails on Hunter’s laptop. What do they say?

The emails conservative media use are “purported” to come from a laptop owned by Hunter Biden until he abandoned it at a computer repair store. For some reason, Hunter Biden had a computer full of evidence that will send him to prison, so he abandoned it for Rudy Giuliani to pick up and expose him. So much about this does not pass the sniff test. And trust me, you don’t want to sniff Giuliani. But, all the emails show is that Hunter was arranging meetings with his business dealings in Ukraine and mentioned his father here and there. Not only do the emails not show any criminal connections to the president, but they don’t display any criminal activity by Hunter Biden. The big news here is that there’s a laptop that might have once belonged to Hunter Biden.

The fact is, there is an investigation of Hunter Biden, but not about his laptop. It’s about his taxes. Now Fox News and conservative media want to focus on someone who doesn’t pay their taxes? Really? Also, if you hate someone for using their political connections for shady business in Ukraine and Russia, maybe talk to Donald Trump. Didn’t he run a beauty pageant in Russia? Didn’t he try to build a Trump Tower in Moscow? Didn’t he try to extort the president of Ukraine? Of course, none of that is as criminal as Hunter Biden having a laptop and an email account.

And if we’re going to send people to prison for using an elected office to grift and profit, then I’m all for sending Hunter Biden to prison as long as he has a lot of company.

Maybe Tucker did talk about the relevance of the laptop but I wouldn’t know because I had to change the channel. Kash Patel, a Trump goon with scary crazy eyes, was coming on to talk about the laptop and I knew I wouldn’t be able to stomach the bullshit. But, I see why people fall for Fox’s gaslighting and lies. It’s an art. Tucker shows clips of people talking about something and he tells his stupid audience they just watched something else. Fox News is not good at the specifics and details of a story. How could he be lying about it when he’s so outraged? Would a guy endorsed by prostate medication and shitty pillows lie to you?

And I didn’t even find what I was looking for as the reason I watched the network in the first place was to see Caitlyn Jenner’s first appearance on Fox News after being hired as a correspondent.

I heard she was going to be on either Tucker or Sean Hannity’s program…and I get those racist gaslighters confused. All conservative racist goony white guys look alike, amiright? As it turns out, she was on Hannity’s show at nine, but I couldn’t flip back over and watch more Fox News. Fives minutes every six months is about all I can take and I didn’t want to have to take two showers in one night.

I did read about Caitlyn’s appearance on Hannity and as it turned out, he only asked her two questions, and no. One of them wasn’t about which bathroom in the building she was going to use.

Fox News hired Caitlyn to be a “trailblazer” for the network but in reality, they hired a trans person who is transphobic. It’s like when they hire a black person who hates black people and votes for a racist like Donald Trump. My black friends says it’s OK for me to be a racist. Now, you have a friend who says it’s OK to hate trans people.

Caitlyn, a Republican, is trans and supports the bigoted “Don’t say gay” bill in Florida. She’s also against a trans swimmer competing with women. Yesterday was Transgender Day of Visibility, so Caitlyn went on Hannity which would be like a black person going on Tucker’s show to celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

Caitlyn pushed all the right buttons to get this job where she’ll only be asked two questions per appearance. During a February appearance on Hannity, she said, “We are living in such a woke world right now, I can’t even figure it out.” 

Where else but on Fox News can you find a trans person complaining about living in a “woke” world? Maybe in six months, I’ll change the channel again.

Good luck finding the restrooms, Caitlyn.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Nuclear Outrage


Good lord, what is it now?

Fox News is in the business of scaring fragile white people. President Barack Obama once said that if he watched Fox News then he’d probably hate President Obama too.

White conservatives are afraid of any change, especially if that change is a threat to their white privilege. They’ve even created a conspiracy theory, pushed by Tucker, called the “Great Replacement Theory,” where liberals are using immigrants to replace people of European ethnicity. And none of those immigrants are going to ever say “Merry Christmas.”

But what the hell are they reporting about Hunter Biden’s laptop while never telling us what’s on it? Sure, The New York Times acknowledged there’s a laptop that Rudy Giuliani claims belongs to Hunter, but we still don’t have any real dirt.

Last week, a college trans swimmer won a women’s competition. This has been covered on actual news outlets, but it’s not the lead it is over at Fucknut TV. Republicans are so outraged by this you’d think they came home to find a trans swimmer in their bathtub corrupting their rubber ducky. He’s seen too much!

Florida’s goon governor, Ron DeSantis, even took time off from signing hate legislation and screaming at children for wearing face masks, that he signed a proclamation declaring the woman who came in second in the swim competition as the actual winner. I wonder if Sidney Powell has notarized it yet.

Republican elected officials are putting more effort into frivolous culture war issues than they are putting into performing their actual jobs, from DeSantis’ hate legislation to Marsha Blackburn asking Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson to “define” women, to Ted Cruz wasting everyone’s time on Critical Race Theory and “racist babies.” It’s like there are no more adults in the GOP or on conservative TV.

Fox News spends a good chunk of its time complaining about the mainstream media, but guess what, Kitty Cat. Fox News is the ratings leader, something conservatives are very proud of but, that makes Fox News the mainstream media.

So, most “news” watchers in this country are being outraged by wokeness, the Great Replacement Theory, the War on Christmas, Critical Race Theory, the 1619 Project, trans swimmers, trans Potato Heads, George Soros, Italian Sattelites changing ballots in Dominion voting machines, convoy truckers’ freedom being taken away, bamboo ballots, Hillary Clinton, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez and the rest of the “squad,” a black female vice president, a black female Supreme Court Justice, Jussie Smollett, socialist face masks, vaccines with microchips, the WAP song, unsexy M&Ms, Dr. Seuss being canceled, the election stolen from Trump, the gay “agenda,” cancel culture, the federal deficit (only when we have a Democratic president), the “Russia hoax,” Dr. Fauci doing his job, and Hunter Biden’s laptop. What did I leave out?

Here’s a new guideline: If Fox News reports it, then you probably don’t have to be upset over it.

Music Note: I listened to the Wallflowers and Toad the Wet Sprocket.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Don’t Say “Boom”


Is it a coincidence that Vladimir Putin and Ron DeSantis are both homophobes?

The president of Russia claims there are no homosexuals in his nation. Ron DeSantis started a war against the LGBTQ and education community long before Russia invaded Ukraine.

After attacking educators over face mask mandates and saying parents should make those decisions, Ron DeSantis attacked kids whose parents had made the decision for them to wear face masks. Now, DeSantis is expected to take the hand that pointed that bony finger at those kids, and sign into law the “Parental Rights in Education” bill, which is more commonly known as the “Don’t Say ‘Gay”” bill. Basically, the bill is giving rights to pick on gay and trans children. Republicans are sweethearts.

While Vladimir Putin is literally killing children in hospitals, apartments, schools, theaters, etc, from the bombs he drops in what amounts to war crimes, Ron DeSantis is also attacking children for his own selfish political benefits. Conservative parents sure do love picking on children who look different whether they’re gay or non-white.

Look at what conservatives have done with anti-Critical Race Theory laws. They don’t change anything but they sure do make racists feel warm and squishy inside. These types of legislations are presented from the standpoint that conservatives are the victims.

If you teach that slavery was a bad thing, or that it even happened, then you’re making white conservatives feel bad about being white, or at least, that’s what you’re trying to do. This nation enslaved black people for over 200 years but talking about it now makes white people feel bad. If you mention anything about gender identity or sexual orientation, then a formerly straight third-grader may return home singing Barry Manilow’s “Copacabana.” We can’t have that. Pound your fist on your desk and say it with me, “WE CAN’T HAVE THAT!” Once that gay earworm gets in your head, there’s no coming back.

These Republican arguments make as much sense as Putin’s that he’s invading Ukraine to denazify it. Sure, there are Nazis in Ukraine, but there were probably more Nazis attacking the Capitol for Donald Trump on January 6, 2021. Can’t we denazify Mar-a-Lago?

I’m pretty sure nobody is teaching elementary students in Florida about gay sex, straight sex, or any sex. But being gay is something that should be acknowledged, and goddammit, normalized. The greatest fear of Republicans is that we’ll remove the stigmatization of being LGBTQ, and then a day will come where kids won’t be bullied for it anymore. Oh, the horror. How will future jocks who are unable to come to terms with their own confusing homosexual feelings supposed to cope if they can’t give gay kids swirlies? In case you’re a Republican, a swirlie is when you take a gay kid’s head and a toilet…oh, you already know what this is.

Ron DeSantis and Florida Republicans aren’t protecting children. They’re protecting their own hate.

Whether the wars are cultural or literal, Republicans, Ron DeSantis, and Vladimir Putin should leave children out of it. And personally, I’d be more than happy to give Ron DeSantis a swirlie.

Music Note: I didn’t listen to any music while drawing this cartoon as I was/am in a rush. But, I did add The Hives’ “Tick Tick Boom” to the 30-second TikTok video of this being drawn.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Who’s Mental?


Cjones06062021

What if you are athletically gifted but not really good with public speaking?

There are people who are uncomfortable in a crowd, talking to strangers, are shy, or are just bad interviewees. You can argue over who was a better boxer, Mike Tyson or Muhammad Ali, but there’s no question who was better with the press.

We look at athletes and see them making millions at their jobs, and when they compete for a championship, we expect more out of them.

We believe since athletes are being paid millions, they owe us. But the truth is, they don’t.

It is a perk when an athlete is able to speak to the public. It’s a great bonus when an athlete can use hir or her position, like LeBron James has, to advance social issues and helps his or her community. It’s especially valuable to the media. Some teams and leagues require their athletes to be available to the press at designated times. Some athletes are not prepared for that kind of pressure. New Orleans Saints running back Ricky Williams was so shy, he would give interviews while wearing his helmet. He was also a person who suffered from social anxiety. The attention his athletic abilities attracted actually hurt his career.

Back to LeBron James, who has refused to reveal whether or not he has been vaccinated, citing his privacy. He has a right to his privacy but he may have put the pressure on himself after being very outspoken on other issues. Where do we draw the line? Also, he should really get vaccinated and use his position to promote it, but that’s just me.

Tennis star Naomi Osaka planned to skip post-match press conferences at the French Open, where she was a favorite to win. She revealed she is suffering from depression and being pressured with multiple questions after hours of physically competing against the best in the world wasn’t appealing to her. After arriving in Paris, she made it know she wouldn’t be doing the press conferences. In response, the Grand Slam Organizations fined her $15,000 and threatened her with suspension which could have prohibited her from playing the French Open, the U.S. Open, the Australian Open, and even Wimbledon. In response to that response, Osaka walked away from the French Open.

She apologized, especially to the press who had been “cool” with her in the past, admitting her wording and timing could have been better…but she owned her power and asserted control for herself. After Osaka received support from other athletes, that same association that fined and threatened further punishment commended her for coming forward about her struggles with mental health and pledged to improve the players’ experience at their events. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why didn’t they talk to her about it before they fined and threatened her?

These people care about other people about as much as Ron DeSantis cares about trans athletes.

DeSantis and his fellow racist Florida Republicans have been busy haters. They created new laws making it harder for black people to vote. The made a law making it legal to run over black protesters with your car. Then, they made it illegal for transgender females to compete in school sports.

Someone on my Facebook page wrote Republicans are really good at solving problems that barely exist…if they exist at all, from voter fraud, to trans athletes, to Mr. Potato Head, etc.

DeSantis said, “In Florida, girls are going to play girls sports and boys are going to play boys sports.” He signed the bill at Trinity Christian Academy, a fundamentalist prep school preparing America’s future right-wing zealots. When he signed his hater-voter bill, he did so live on Fox News while barring other media outlets. He also signed it on the first day of Gay Pride Month. A similar law is on the books in Idaho and there are measures to duplicate it in Arkansas, Mississippi, and Tennessee.

The NCAA, which requires transgender women to get treatment to lower their testosterone levels before they can compete in women’s sports, said it would commit championship games to “locations where hosts can commit to providing an environment that is safe, healthy and free of discrimination.” Guess what. That’s not Florida.

Originally, there was language in the bill that included a requirement transgender athletes in high schools and colleges undergo testosterone or genetic testing and submit to having their genitalia examined.

Basically, DeSantis is taking sports away from kids. Republicans are making an art out of cruelty. Donald Trump is to blame for this pattern that requires one to be as vile and ugly as possible to be a Republican.

Athletes are not required to be totally open with us because they’re not public servants. Politicians like Ron DeSantis are public servants we pay.

I’m less concerned about them being boy, girl, or trans, and more concerned, especially with regards to Republicans, whether or not they’re actually human.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have two copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Trust The Science


cjones03012021

One word I’ve always hated in politics is “tolerance.” It seems like a very low bar to get over. Think about it. If you come to a party at my house and I say that I will tolerate your presence, that sounds kinda rude and that there’s something seriously wrong with you. It sounds like I’m tolerating you despite a lot of stuff…and gee whiz, what a great guy I am to tolerate you despite how horrible you are. It’s not so much tolerance we need to strive for as it is acceptance.

But in today’s climate, I’ll accept some tolerance.

The United States House of Representatives passed sweeping legislation yesterday to ban discrimination against people based on sexual orientation and gender identity, delivering a major victory to the LGBTQ community. And in doing so, it exposed the Republican Party for the troglodytes that they are. No, not just in that a majority of them being against “tolerance,” but that basically, the entire party is bigoted.

Yesterday, only three Republicans voted that people should not be discriminated against based on sexual orientation or gender identity. That’s fewer than half it got from Republicans the last time the Equality Act came to the House floor. Yesterday’s vote was an amendment to the historic 1964 Civil Rights Act. Every single member of the Democratic Party voted for it. The Republican Party is going backwards.

“Progress” is another good word. The Republican Party, after four years of being the party of Trump, is regressive.

Another sign the Republican Party is regressive and full of hate is its Qanon member and fucknut lunatic Marjorie Taylor Greene.

To put it simply, and that’s how it should be put so Trump supporters can understand it, Marjorie Taylor Greene is a horrible vile disgusting person. She is a bully. She has claimed school shootings are staged and the survivors are “crisis actors.” There is video, that she took, of her stalking and bullying David Hogg, a survivor of the Parkland school shooting and a gun-control advocate.

Illinois Democratic Representative Marie Newman raised a transgender pride flag outside her office. As it turns out, she’s office neighbors with Marjorie Taylor Greene, whose office, shockingly, is not in a dumpster behind the Capitol. And you thought you had bad neighbors, what with the 20 cars on the street, unchained dogs, blaring ska music, and every time they grill it smells like they’re cooking camel hair. Also, if your neighbor has a Trump sign…I’m so sorry.

Newman posted a video on Twitter of her raising the flag and wrote, “Our neighbor tried to block the Equality Act because she believes prohibiting discrimination against trans Americans is ‘disgusting, immoral, and evil.'” To be fair, Newman trolled her a little bit but it’s something that should only help Greene by being forced to see on a daily basis. Oh no! It’s a flag of many colors. Eeeeeek!

Naturally, Greene fired back.

Newman has a transgender daughter, so what Greene did is bullying. Marjorie Taylor Greene hung a sign outside her office, in a video, that said, “There are TWO genders: Male & Female. Trust The Science!” Yes, Marjorie Taylor Greene, who believes that California wildfires were caused by Jewish space lasers and at times has refused to wear a face mask (and when she has, it’s stated “Trump won,” “Stop the Steal,” or “Biden is useless”), wants you to “trust the science.”

It should be noted that Greene has a lot of free time for extracurricular activities like pursuing her insanity, bullying, and going to Kinko’s for making signs and face masks with hate slogans. Why does a sitting member of Congress have so much free time? Because she has zero committee assignments, having been kicked off them by the majority of the House. Why was she kicked of all her committees? Because she’s a lunatic who has expressed stupid conspiracy theories and endorsed acts of violence against fellow House members. What good is she in Congress without any committee assignments? She’s no good and totally useless as a representative. Her district has a Representative who can’t represent them…unless they want a troll to hang hate signs in the Capitol office buildings. She’s real good at that.

Greene also tweeted a personal attack on her Congressional neighbor stating she refuses to recognize her daughter as a woman, but she does recognize Jewish space lasers.

Greene, who earlier tried to delay the vote on the Equality Act on the silly argument that it infringes on women’s rights and religious freedom (the freedom to be a bigot) is a great example of why this act needs to pass. People can still discriminate by using Greene’s stupid arguments. Mitt Romney, a very moderate Republican Senator, has the same opposition to the Equality Act as lunatic bully Qanon conspiracy theory-champion fucknut Marjorie Taylor Greene. They use the same words and argument of “religious freedom.” We are still in dangerous times for the gay and trans community. Also, stop using your god as an excuse to hate on people, fuckers. It’s weird.

Also, this whole bathroom argument is absurd and it doesn’t work. The argument is that male perverts will pose as women and go into the ladies room and spy on little girls. First, how are we preventing perverts from spying on little boys in the men’s room? Second, you’re not supposed to be peeking at anybody’s stuff in any bathroom no matter what you are. Stop it. Is this something conservatives actively do? Do they walk up next to a guy at the stall and say, “Hey, don’t worry because I’m not trans or gay but I see you have a nice penis there. Rock on.”

Representative Newman gave a speech and said, “I rise today on behalf of the millions of Americans who continue to be denied housing, education, public services and much, much more because they identify as members of the LGBTQ community. Americans like my own daughter, who years ago bravely came out to her parents as transgender. I knew from that day on, my daughter would be living in a nation where [in] most of its states, she could be discriminated against, merely because of who she is.”

Merely because of who she is.

There is more acceptance among the Republican Party for lunatic bully troglodyte Marjorie Taylor Greene than there is for Newman’s daughter. Yesterday, Rand Paul displayed his transphobia during the confirmation hearing for Rachel Levin for the assistant health secretary position, a physician who would be the highest-ranking openly transgender official in government history. Rand Paul was not afraid of revealing his bigotry. Like Greene, he was proud of it. Of course, these are two extreme examples because both Paul and Greene are assholes and nobody likes them.

The Equality Act needs 60 votes to pass in the Senate. In case you lost count, that means the bill needs ten Republicans. But with the likes of Mitt Romney opposing the meausre, it’s in trouble.

Tolerance is in trouble.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: I have SEVEN copies of my book in stock, which I’m selling for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Supreme Gaydar


cjones06182020

Right now, someone at Hobby Lobby is crying their homophobic balls off.

The Supreme Court decided by a 6-3 margin, that the 1964 Civil Rights Act also protects gay and transgender workers from workplace discrimination. Let me put this so the fucknuts can comprehend it: Your boss can’t fire you for being gay…so you can come out now. He can’t even fire you if you work in a bakery refusing to bake gay wedding cakes. How a cake can be gay, I don’t know but still…they can’t fire you.

The real shocker with this ruling is that two of the court’s more conservative justices voted in the majority. John Roberts, who is the Chief Justice and has sided with the liberals in the past, and the occupier of Merrick Garland’s seat, Neil Gorsuch. In fact, Gorsuch wrote the majority opinion.

Gorsuch breaks it down for you also, writing, “An employer who fires an individual merely for being gay or transgender defies the law.” Before this ruling, even with gay marriage legal, it was still legal in half the states in the nation to fire someone simply for being gay, bisexual, or transgender. Now, all those right-to-work states are going to have to go back to firing people without giving a reason. That’s still legal. They can fire you for being gay as long as they don’t tell you why you’re being fired.

Donald Trump, the president (sic) who nominated Gorsuch for that stolen SCOTUS seat, said, “I’ve read the decision and some people were surprised, but they’ve ruled and we live with their decision. He added it was a “very powerful decision, actually.” The truth is, he’s not happy. His administration has been busting gay rights since he came into office.

Donald Trump has urged the court to rule against gay workers. He’s barred most transgenders from serving in the military. Just last week, the Department of Health and Human Services issued a regulation that removed protections for transgender patients against discrimination by doctors, hospitals, and health insurance companies. Even though Donald Trump said Caitlyn Jenner could use the bathroom at Trump Tower (watch out, Caitlyn. There’s a bunch of goons at the doorway), he’s not really progressive with LGBTQ issues.

Justice Samuel Alito wrote the dissenting opinion saying, “The common understanding of sex discrimination in 1964 was bias against women or men and did not encompass discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. If Congress wanted to protect gay and transgender workers, he wrote, it could pass a new law.”

Let me break down Alito’s argument: Because homophobia was more acceptable in 1964 when the anti-discrimination act was written and the creators of that law had no intention of protecting LGBTQ people, that law should not protect LGBTQ people.

Seriously…this guy is on the Supreme Court? That was basically reasoning you could find in the parking lot of a Trump rally but presented with much more eloquent words than, “fuck the gays.”

Thank you, Justice Neil Gorsuch. You did the right thing. Now, if you want to continue to do the right thing, before every vote you should ask yourself, “What would Merrick Garland do?” Then do that.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

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Hater Chicken Concedes


cjones11232019

After a brouhaha erupted over Chick-fil-A supporting hate groups, conservatives rallied around the chicken sandwich people.

Conservatives rallied by posting photos of themselves on social media eating chicken sandwiches. That was their idea of sticking it to liberals. It was another form of tribalism.

It doesn’t matter how abhorrent conservatives are, the base will rally. Supporting hate groups qualifies as abhorrent. You would think at least one prominent conservative would have reached out and said, “You make a nice sandwich, but maybe stop supporting hate groups.”

Now, Chick-fil-A is caving. They’ve decided to no longer donate to groups that hate gays, lesbians, trans, etc. And conservatives are flipping out. Remember when they told us to get over it and buy a chicken sandwich, dammit? Yeah, now they’re crying about being betrayed. Betrayed by Chick-fil-A. Now they know how McRib fans feel.

Mike Huckabee, the former governor of Arkansas and the man who spawned Sarah Huckabee Sanders, tweeted, “In Aug 2012, I coordinated a national @ChickfilA Appreciation Day after they were being bullied by militant hate groups. Millions showed up. Today, @ChickfilA betrayed loyal customers for $$. I regret believing they would stay true to convictions of founder Truett Cathey. Sad.”

Aw. It sounds like Papa Huckasans doesn’t appreciate Chick-fil-A anymore. Here’s the thing, Huckabee, you don’t support hate groups and complain about being bullied by hate groups. The fact of the matter is, Mike Huckabee is one of the ringleaders of hate.

Drew Anderson, director of campaigns and rapid response for GLAAD said, “If Chick-fil-A is serious about their pledge to stop holding hands with divisive anti-LGBTQ activists, then further transparency is needed regarding their deep ties to organizations like Focus on the Family. Chick-fil-A investors, employees, and customers can greet today’s announcement with cautious optimism, but should remember that similar press statements were previously proven to be empty.”

So all that show of support by conservatives, the “appreciation day,” social media sandwich photos, etc, were to no avail. Did Chick-fil-A figure out that conservatives are a dying species? Did they figure out, even though they’re based in the deep south, that liberals and moderates outnumber conservatives? Or did they just figure out that Popeyes new sandwich is kicking their ass and doing so without hate?

What’s next? Will Chick-fil-A figure out that people like chicken sandwiches on Sundays too?

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You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

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