Kari Lake

Blowing Smoke With Kari

We are accustomed to receiving election results on election night, but we are not entitled. Naturally, Republicans believe they’re entitled to everything they want. And if they don’t get what they want, they lie and whine like little babies.

Jim Jordan tweeted, “Election results should be known on election night.”
Why? You’re not entitled. In fact, official counting of votes has NEVER been completed by any state on election night. It’s never happened. David Becker, executive director of the nonpartisan Center for Election Innovation & Research, said it’s never happened at any point in our nation’s history. Ever, ever, ever. Never.

Taking days to learn the results of an election isn’t new. We didn’t know who won the 2000 presidential election for over a month, which was into December. Even then, we never really found out who won the most votes as it was the Supreme Court ending the Florida recount in a 5-4 decision, giving it to the…wait for it…Republican. Do you remember the GOP outrage over that? Yeah, me neither.

Before and after the governorship of Arizona was called last night for Democrat Katie Hobbs, and the senate for Democrat Mark Kelly, Republicans were griping about how long the count was taking. Hobbs defeated Kari Lake by over 20,000 votes and Kelly beat Blake Masters by over 126,000. Oddly enough, you didn’t hear these complaints concerning Lauren Boebert’s win for her Colorado congressional district, which took several days to count and handed her a victory of just a little more than 2,000 votes.

If we had stopped counting on election night in Boebert’s district, she wouldn’t be going back to Congress. Eat that, hypocrites.

Tomi Lahren tweeted, “I am utterly disgusted about whatever the hell happened in Arizona. Un-freakin-believable!!!”
Yet, she can’t tell us “what the hell happened” in Arizona. I’ll tell you what happened, Tomi. You lost. You lost because more Arizona voters voted for the Democrats than for the Republicans. That’s it.

Another right-wing goon named Brigitte Gabriel who must be important because she has a blue badge on Twitter unless she paid for it, tweeted, “Mail in voting is a crime against Democracy! Ban it!”
No, it’s NOT a crime. And there has never been a massive election fraud that’s come from mail-in voting. Fact, fat, fuckity, fact, fact.

Marjorie Taylor Greene tweeted, “Our elections are the laughing stock of the world. Other countries do it in one day and count all of their ballots. They get their elections done. I don’t know why the United States can’t accomplish this in one day.”
Actually, Marjorie, there are a lot of things you don’t know. It can take up to ten days after an election in Australia to count all the votes and declare a winner. Canada was still counting votes three days after the 2021 federal election. It can take a week in the United Kingdom. And where winners are announced on election night, like France, you have to take into account that the vote count is conducted by the federal government, not local governments. Also, keep in mind that we have more people than most other countries. There are a little over 65 million people in France compared to 331 million in the United States. The number of voters in the U.S. was more than double the entire population of France.

And Marjorie, the only way our elections make us the laughingstock of the world is because some of our elections are won by ignorant stupid racist goons such as yourself. I’m mostly shocked you didn’t claim the votes were being counted by the Gazpacho Police.

Matt Schlapp, another goon with a blue badge, tweeted, “I’m awed by Katie Hobbs who managed to be in charge of AZ’s election and allowed the biggest suppression of Election Day votes while having her squad count so slowly and privately that no one has any idea what the hell just happened including reporters.”
Actually, Republicans were mostly in charge of the count in Arizona. And again, what happened was you lost.

By the way, Brian Kemp was Secretary of State for Georgia when he won the election for governor of that state. Before the election, he put over 53,000 voter registration applications on hold, with 70% of the applicants being black voters. He also purged 1.4 million voters from the state’s system, again, mostly black voters. He also resisted the federal efforts to secure state voting systems and exposed voters’ data. Did Mr. Schlapp ever express doubt over any of Kemp’s election victories? He was probably too busy schlapping his monkey over election-denying bullshit.

Here’s the problem with mail-in voting for Republicans: Mail-in voting makes it easier to vote, thus more people vote. The more people who vote, the more people who vote against Republicans. The larger the turnout, the more votes Democrats receive. That’s democracy. The Republicans have a problem with democracy.

Over the past decade, more Americans have been voting for Democrats than Republicans. Republicans have only won the popular vote once in a presidential election over the past 30 years. The Republicans’ saving grace is that we have a very flawed system that lets them retain power, and install federal judges, despite the fact most of us hate them.

It’s a lot easier for Republicans to lie, whine, cry, and scream about the system when they lose than it is to offer policies and messages that appeal to the majority of Americans. As it turns out, the majority of Americans believe in a right to choose, choose America over Russia, and don’t like election deniers and insurrectionists all that much. The people who are claiming without proof that something fraudulent happened in Arizona are the same people who supported a coup for a Russian puppet who lost the 2020 presidential election.

Kari Lake said she’d only accept the results if she won. She said that because she’s anti-democracy and pro-fascist, and she knew if every vote was counted, she would lose. It’s why Donald Trump tried to cast doubt on the 2020 election being fair months before the election. He knew he was going to lose. Let me drop a spoiler for you now. He’s going to lose again in 2024.

None of these election deniers have ever produced evidence the 2020 election was won by Donald Trump and stolen by Joe Biden. And before they claim Arizona, Nevada, or any other states’ elections were stolen, they should provide proof. You can bet that if they lose the Georgia runoff in December, they’ll cry foul without any proof there too.

One good reason to vote against a person is if they’re not mature enough to handle losing. Nobody likes losing, but you don’t have to be lying babies about it. The lack of confidence in our elections is only because we have Republican goons telling the American public they can’t trust elections.

No, it’s not elections I don’t trust. I don’t trust Republicans.

Music note: I listened to Nirvana.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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Lake O’ Lies

Kari Lake is the Republican nominee for the governorship of Arizona. And she’s a MAGAt liar. She’s one of hundreds of candidates running in this nation that push The Big Lie, that either Trump won or that there was massive election fraud throughout the country. There are over 300 candidates in the United States who deny that President Biden won the 2020 election. FiveThirtyEight says 60 percent of Americans will have an election denier on their ballot this fall. That’s fucked up and ironic all at once.

These goons are running for office asking for your vote which they claim is fraudulent. Many are claiming elections don’t work unless they win. Some of these goons are running for office where it will be their job, if they win, to protect the integrity of elections.

Kari Lake is one of them. Lake went on CNN over the past weekend where Dana Bash bashed her over her election-denying lies. Bash asked Lake why she kept repeating the lies. Lake said, “Well, there’s plenty of evidence. We had 740,000 ballots with no chain of custody. Those ballots shouldn’t have been counted.”

Officials in Maricopa County, Arizona, acknowledge that a fifth of the forms documenting the transfer of drop-box ballots had incomplete information, including missing signatures. The county estimates that maybe as many as 200,000 votes were transferred without full documentation. Election-denying right-wing groups have used this to build and push the conspiracy of massive election fraud.

But, that’s not evidence of fraud. It’s evidence of mismanagement. And, the presidential election in Maricopa County has been audited more than once, even by Republican groups pushing the Big Lie. Yet, Lake believes all those votes, more than a third cast in the county, should be thrown out. Throwing out votes is NOT “election integrity.” That’s fraud. Republicans claim votes for Trump were thrown out in the 2020 election, yet they’re demanding that the same thing be done with votes for Joe Biden.

This is like when Republicans yell and scream about corruption from Hillary Clinton or Hunter Biden that they can’t actually prove, while ignoring Trump’s corruption. The thing is, they don’t actually care about corruption, just partisanship. If you’re upset over Hunter Biden, who’s never ever worked in government, receiving money from foreign sources but don’t give a hoot about Jared Kushner receiving $2 billion from his buddy and journalist murderer, Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, who he had many negotiations with as a White House adviser, then you don’t care about actual corruption. You’re a fraud and a hack. The truth is, you support corruption.

It’s like when these goons scream about corruption in Ukraine when the actual problem they have with that nation is it wasn’t corrupt enough to play ball with Donald Trump’s corruption.

And these goons like Kari Lake don’t care about “election integrity.” You don’t care about election integry when you’re trying to destroy the right to vote. Liar don’t have integrity, so they’re not the people to trust with our elections.

Bash asked Lake, “If leaders like you and President Trump are saying that the election was stolen, aren’t you participating, contributing, even causing the idea of people thinking that the election is not safe and secure?” Lake lied and said no.

Lake said, “No. We are going to make sure our elections are safe and secure for Democrats, independents and Republicans alike. We want to know that our legal vote counted.” But the thing is, they were counted. And in Maricopa County, counted multiple times. Even Republicans aligned with Trump couldn’t find any election. Yet, Lake lies and still says Trump won the state and Biden stole the presidency. And, she doesn’t use proof because she doesn’t have any.

Lake is a liar. Like most Republicans, it’s kind of her thing. She’s also a vile human being and has called for the arrest of her opponent, Katie Hobbs, without any real reason. She’s called for the arrest of journalists which is scary considering she used to be one.

Lake has claimed January 6 rioters have been imprisonsed without being charged (a lie). She has repeated false claims of election fraud from people like Sidney Powell. She likes to spread her lies on Parler, a right-wing hate site which is about to be bought by Kanye West.

And Lake says she will accept the results of Arizona’s gubernatorial election…only if she wins.

Kari Lake, like Donald Trump and all Republicans, do not care about election integrity. You can’t really care about election integrity when you personally don’t have any integrity.

Creative note: I’m leaving Louisiana today and my flight is at 5:32 p.m. I had to check out of my ratty hotel at 11 a.m. Since I had nowhere to go and didn’t want to just keep Ubering all over the twin cities (Monroe and West Monroe), I came to the airport. I figured I had plenty of time to write this blog before my flight.

Monroe’s airport is a tiny regional airport that only gets about five flights a day, from either Atlanta or Dallas/Fort Worth. There are empty counters car rental companies used to occupy (there are two left). There are empty spots where there used to be restaurants. There are no more restaurants in this airport and in fact, it’s probably the only airport in the nation where you can NOT get a cup of coffee. Even the airport on Wings had a lunch counter. There are vending machines which a guy is refilling right now…noisily. In fact, despite the slow business in this airport, it’s chock-full of distractions while I’m trying to write. There are the announcements that don’t really pertain to anyone because no one is flying yet. There’s the security guard tapping his fingers on his desk because there aren’t enough people here to look at suspiciously. There are weird pounding noises coming from a place unknown. Several airport employees are having conversations with each other while standing 40 feet apart. There are the kids standing at the snack machines trying to make up their minds while debating Doritos vs. Mr. Freshley’s Cupcakes. And goddammit, snack man is back to refill the same machine.

I can sit in a busy airport like Washington or Atlanta, and get work done. But a quiet place with just one noise will stop me in my tracks and I can’t think of how to write the next…

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

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