Guns

Ken And Karen


cjones07032020

If you’re on social media, that’s probably how you became aware of this story.

This story started because St. Louis Mayor Lyda Krewson publicized the names and addresses of her constituents who had written to her about defunding the police department during a Facebook Live stream. Protesters were on their way to her house, in a rich and snooty neighborhood, to let her know how they felt about that. Along the way, they encountered this charming couple.

Mark and Patricia McCloskey, who are personal injury lawyers, went out onto their lawn to point weapons at the protesters as they passed by. They were identified by St. Louis Today because, in 2018, they were featured in St. Louis Magazine about finishing renovations to their midwestern palazzo. What the fuck is a palazzo?

I don’t like to get my news from social media, but I will follow a tip. I wanted to know the entire scoop on this. How did I Google search? Did I type, “St. Louis assholes with guns?” Did I type, “St. Louis Snobby McSnobbersons?” Did I type, “Entitled jerkwad couple point guns at protesters?” Did I type, “shoeless racist gun nuts?” Nope.

I typed and searched for “Ken and Karen.” Bingo!

What’s a Ken and Karen? Ken is a male Karen. What’s a Karen? I’m glad you asked.

A Karen is a pejorative term for an older privileged obnoxious entitled woman who demands to get her way. The Urban Dictionary describes it as “rude, obnoxious and insufferable middle-aged white women.” A male of this species is often referred to as a “Ken” or a “male Karen.” “Man Karen” works too.

I know three Karens. I’m not sure about one of them but two are definitely NOT Karens. One is a fabulous musician who has released a couple of albums and whose first performance at SXSW was ruined by the coronavirus. She’s definitely NOT a Karen. The other is like a sister to me, thinks like I do on just about everything with politics, and she’s also not white. Well, maybe a little white. She’s all mixed up. She’s NOT a Karen.

But this pair of Karens in St. Louis are Karens. How entitled are these racist mansion dwellers? They were able to point loaded weapons at peaceful protesters and not be charged. In fact, a police report was filed because the protesters are accused of breaking through a gate and walking down a private street, and in this report, the two Karens are listed as…wait for it…victims.

How are they victims? Because a bunch of black people walked in front of their snooty-ass house? Oh no! Black people! Get the guns. Don’t bother putting on shoes….and yes, Rambo would wear a pink shirt, but tuck it in. Get out there and point!

Fuck the Karens.

In fact, there aren’t any reports of any homes being vandalized along the way. So why were the Karens justified to stand on their lawn, not just with weapons, but pointing them at human beings who were merely walking past their house? Oh yeah. Those human beings were black. If Ken and Karen have any black friends, I hope they never shoot them.

There was a protest in my town over the weekend. A couple of them actually…in support of the police. Shockingly enough, it was almost entirely white. The police didn’t obstruct these protesters. They didn’t follow them waiting for them to do something bad. They didn’t teargas them. They worked to protect those protesters. They worked to guard a bunch of Karens.

Yes, systemic racism is real. Yes, white privilege is a thing.

How can you tell if you’re a Karen? Are you a rich and entitled white asshole? Are you a non-rich entitled white asshole? Do you not believe in systemic racism? Can you protest against Black Lives Matter and get special treatment from cops? Can you stand in front of your mansion and point guns at peaceful black people without any repercussions?

Also, you may be a Karen if you own a palazzo, whatever the fuck that is.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

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Sniveling Corona Cowards


cjones05192020

I’ve always liked the actor Kevin James. I liked his show, King of Queens, and thought he did a great job and matched well with Will Smith in Hitch. Heck, I even liked Paul Blart a little. Granted, everything else he’s done has kinda sucked, but I still liked him. He’s always seemed like an everyman kinda dude. Now, I like him a little less.

Kevin James’ latest production is the worst thing he’s ever made. Yeah. Even worse than Paul Blart 2. It’s worse than Grown Ups. It’s even worse than Grown Ups 2. It’s probably worse than that movie where he talks to zoo animals. I say probably because I haven’t seen it but it looks pretty bad. Do you want proof his latest thing is bad? The conservative Trump cult fucknuts love it.

James has a YouTube channel where he posts short films. His latest film is about two men on the run from the authorities for being out in public without wearing masks and for shaking hands. Seriously.

There are now 86,000 deaths in this nation from the coronavirus and Kevin James has joined all those idiots crying about their “freedom” when nobody has taken their freedom. Despite nobody being arrested for not wearing a mask or for shaking hands, James has joined in with the shitweasel brigade and the Flat Earthers. I understand satire but I also understand propaganda. This tilts more toward the latter. This is some real Ben Garrison shit.

These idiots who scream about their liberties and storm state capitals with guns, Nazi symbols, and nooses, NEVER speak out when a black man is profiled or killed by the police. They NEVER speak out when voting rights are denied to non-white American citizens. They NEVER defend free speech except whenever a university disinvites a Nazi from speaking on their campus. But now, they have a new hero in Kevin James. Congratulations, Kevin. You’re in the same club as Ted Nugent and James Woods. Heck, you’re in the same club as the worst Baldwin brother, You know. Whatsisname Baldwin brother.

These people who have watched Red Dawn too many times act as though their purchase of a gun is supporting the Second Amendment. They believe carrying an assault weapon with them everywhere they go, whether it’s Chick-fil-A or the state capitol building, defends their Second Amendment Rights.

These gun nuts who describe themselves as “Constitutionalists” only know one Constitutional Amendment. And even then, they bastardize it by ALWAYS omitting the “well-regulated” part. Anytime you mention “regulation” in the context of guns, they scream you’re taking away their Second Amendment rights despite the fact “well regulated” is literally in the Second Amendment. I swear. Look it up.

But, if their buying a gun reinforces their Second Amendment rights, then me telling them they’re all a bunch of racist Kool-Aid drinking cultist knuckle-dragging treasonous Putin-Loving dumbasses reinforces my First Amendments rights.

Keep in mind, the people who believe being “forced” to wear masks and closing the country is all designed to steal their freedom and punish Donald Trump also believe Climate Change is a hoax.

Now, they’re saying you’re a coward if you don’t leave your house without a mask. Why look how brave they are by going outside without a face covering. Why look how brave their president (sic) is being the only one not wearing a mask while visiting a PPE plant or a factory that actually makes masks. They are so proud. I’m sorry but I don’t think stupidity is something to be proud of.

The people staying home and wearing masks are the true patriots. They’re not just protecting themselves. They’re protecting you even though you don’t deserve it.

The real cowards are supporters of Donald Trump. They’re afraid to leave their houses without assault weapons and they vote for a guy who runs on a campaign of fear. Trump supporters are afraid of everything.

But then again, calling us “cowards” for doing the right thing and protecting our nation is once again them projecting. We need to protect our nation from the coronavirus and all…

…we need to protect our nation from gun-toting sniveling coward Trump supporters.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Maga Monkeys


cjones04232020

As I’m sure you’re aware of now, the MAGAt teabagger gang is at it again.

Trump cultists are protesting the government’s stay-at-home orders in several states. They’re anxious to get the economy rolling again, to get back to work, to resume earning a living, and to just get out of the house. We all have that frustration. We all want to earn a living, feed our families, and pay our bills. That’s not partisan.

But, there’s something else to these protests. They’re partisan. Wanting to restart the economy shouldn’t be partisan or red versus blue. But you kinda think it is when they’re flying Confederate flags with their protests. You kinda think it is when they’re carrying guns. You kinda think it is when they’re calling their Democratic governor a Nazi and a fascist. Mostly, you kinda get the impression it’s partisan when they’re wearing and flying pro-Trump signs.

I think my favorite sign has been one that said “Make American Great Again” and “Keep America Great.” Well, which is it? How do we make America great again if it’s already great? How do we keep it great when we haven’t made it great yet?

But then again, these are Trump cultists and there’s not a lot they do that makes sense. For example: They’re protesting for Donald Trump and against his recommendations. The White House issued the recommendation for Americans to self-isolate and quarantine themselves. That’s what they’re protesting while waving MAGA signs. Of course, being a hypocrite and contradiction has always been the hallmark of being a MAGAt shitweasel fucknut. They’re all patriots who ignore Russia attacking our election. They support our troops while supporting Donald Trump’s attacks on Gold Star families, his statement that POWs are “only war heroes because they got captured,” and he only likes people who “aren’t captured.”

These protests aren’t organic. They’ve been organized by right-wing Facebook groups, InfoWars, Fox News, 4chan, and…wait for it…Donald Fucking Trump. Trump advisor Stephen Moore compared them to Rosa Parks. Rosa Parks stood against discrimination. These fruit loops don’t get that they’re not being discriminated against as we’re ALL being told to stay at home. Also, this is a group that’s 99% white. If they’re Rosa Parks then I’m Gandhi, which I’m not because I had two BLT sandwiches last night. Plus, I’m not bald and I don’t walk around wearing nothing except for one of Dr. Birx’s tablecloths.

The biggest instigator for this is Donald Trump. If he was a true leader, he’d tell them to go home and stay home. But no. While arguing that Nancy Pelosi is playing “partisan politics,” he’s sending tweets encouraging attacks against Democratic governors. While everyone is being told to stay home, in states with Democratic and Republican governors, Trump only focused on those with Democrats. He tweeted, “Liberate Michigan” which is governed by Democrat Gretchen Whitmer. He tweeted, “Liberate Minnesota” which is governed by Democrat Tom Walz. “He tweeted, “Liberate Virginia” which is governed by Ralph Northum. The other thing these states have in common is that they’re viewed as swing states.

In addition to tweeting out those attacks, Trump is calling for “liberating” Virginia because of new gun measures…none of which has anything to do with the pandemic (other than indoor gun ranges being deemed “unessential”). Also, I don’t think Virginia is a swing state anymore. While I do believe a Republican can win here statewide, not in the era of Trump. The Republican who has the longest shot of winning Virginia is Donald Trump. No thank you, Mr. Trump, but please, go ahead and waste a lot of money and time here.

Donald Trump could not tell you how the gun laws in Virginia violate the Second Amendment, but he likes to say it does. He also says many of the governors have gone “too far” and that they’ve been “tough” on their people, but he couldn’t tell you how.

Donald Trump refused to tell the protesters to go home. He even said they look responsible and they were social distancing. If you’ve seen photos of the protests, that’s a lie. They are not social distancing and most aren’t wearing masks. Some of my favorites are the guys holding signs saying the coronavirus is a hoax while wearing face masks. If it’s a hoax, then why are you wearing a mask? Again…Trump cultists.

If Donald Trump really wants to support these covidiots, then he needs to go out there and mingle with them. Just stay six feet apart. I’m sure he’ll be fine. But better yet, work on testing.

Donald Trump said, “everyone who needs a test gets a test.” That’s not true and we’re only testing about 50,000 a day. We need to test 50 million a day. Now Trump says it’s the states’ job to test and to acquire the tests. He’s not “responsible.” But, it’s obviously easier to divide the nation with tweets of  “liberation” than doing your job. It’s easier to hold daily mini-MAGA rallies with no real updates other than Donald Trump explaining the difference between a cotton swab and a Q-tip.

There are two sets of people working to get us back out there and reopen the economy. Those are essential workers, who are risking their lives, and those who are staying home. Staying home is working and it’s flattening the curve. These people who are going out and protesting, they’re working against us being able to go out and work and spend money. What they’re doing is a slap in the face to everyone who’s trying to end this.

While people are risking their lives so you can buy groceries, these idiots are risking all of our lives to promote their Dear Leader. They are a disgrace to America and everyone who’s doing their part to end this pandemic.

If you’re out there protesting, I respect your right to protest but I don’t respect you or what you’re doing. But then again, you already disrespected everything this nation stands for by voting for Donald Trump. You are all bad Americans.

If you wanna stop staying home, then stay home. And if you really want to get this nation rolling again, stop being Donald Trump’s flying monkeys. Or more specifically in your case, stop being Donald Trump’s flying fucknuts.

Tip Jar:

This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performing busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From 

Watch me draw.

Neo-Nazi Gun Rally


cjones01202020

Yesterday, I wrote on Twitter: Dear gun fetishists. Please keep your and your racist and Nazi friends’ asses out of my state next week. Thanks.

I got replies to that. I was surprised at how many and the type of replies I got. And no, I didn’t respond to any of them.

Thousands of protesters are expected to the state capitol grounds in Richmond on Monday to protest proposed restrictions on gun purchases by the Virginia Legislature. The governor, Ralph Northam, has declared a state of emergency and announced a temporary ban on weapons on the grounds of the State Capitol ahead of the rally.

Yes, these people are upset at gun restrictions in Virginia, yet a ban on guns on the grounds of the State Capitol is only temporary. In case you’re a Republican, “temporary” means not forever. Also, why are you upset about this when you’re never angry about there being a ban on guns at NRA conventions? Think about it.

The reason for the state of emergency is that authorities have identified credible “threats of violence,” including from out-of-state militia groups and hate groups that are planning to start shit. The governor said the authorities had also found extremist rhetoric online similar to what had been seen in 2017 before the Charlottesville tiki-torch march conducted by hate groups in 2017 over removing Confederate statues, that left one girl dead.

Also, Monday is Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday, which is a federal holiday, so don’t tell me there’s not a racist aspect to this. It’s like trying to tell me you’re not a racist while you’re wearing a sheet.

I think there’s something to these threats online because even I, little ole me, pipsqueak cartoonist who’s not major on the national scene, got some very cryptic replies to my tweet last night and this morning. And I’m not just talking about all the F-You comments.

I got the black-friend defense. I got the Hitler-banned-guns defense (I love that they fail to capture the irony in lying about the Holocaust to support their gun fetish while saying they’re not bigots). I got the I’m-Rubber-You’re-Glue defense, as in, “I’m not the Nazi. You’re the Nazi,” which is heavily used among the MAGAt crowd (I’m not the puppet. You’re the puppet).

And finally, I got the We’re-Going-To-Find-Where-You-Live reply. Yes, because somebody did not like my tweet. Earlier today, I even saw comments on a right-wing friend’s page that the governor has a “surprise” coming to him.

While these people are screaming at me for lumping gun fucknuts in with racists, white nationalists, and Nazis converging on my state’s capital on Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday, the FBI…wait for it…just arrested three neo-Nazis, who’ve been planning for a race war, who had just obtained a bunch of guns and were planning…try not to be shocked…on traveling to Virginia for Monday’s gun rally.

So, to all the gun nuts who yelled at me yesterday, “We’re not the racists,” let me steal from Andrew Gillum in that it’s not me who thinks you’re racist. The racists think you’re racist. Do you know why they think you’re racist? Because you’re racist.

Here’s the thing, when you’re marching with Nazis, you’re marching with Nazis. And, when Nazis get together, nothing good can come from it. So no, we don’t want you here in Virginia. We’re good. Thanks.

See, here in Virginia, we’re turning blue and we don’t want any more mass shootings in our state. I understand dead school children is a price you’re willing to pay for the right to dry hump an Uzi, but don’t use our children.

Governor Ralph Northam is right to declare a state of emergency over gun nuts descending down upon our state. Our nation’s gun nuts are a state of emergency, just like our president (sic) is a national emergency.

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Yee-Haw For Guns


cjones01012020

Right-wingers with gun fetishes have these fantasies that a bad guy will pop up, armed for a shooting spree, and then they’ll scream “yee-haw,” take the bad guy down with the gun they’re packing for such an event, and they’ll be heralded as a hero on the cover of the next issue of National Review and Gun Fetish Weekly. Somewhere in the headline, it’ll point out that our hero does not have a small penis.

It is a fantasy that rarely comes true. Most of these gun fetishists could have served in the military but declined. But, they’re real big about arming themselves as if they’re about to single-handedly invade Gambia. Or better yet, they have enough firepower to overturn a government insurrection from the deep state when they try to take their guns and remove their Republican president who was fairly elected by more acres than people.

The “good guy with a gun” is more than a fantasy. It’s propaganda and for the National Rifle Association, a selling point. They sell T-Shirts with the slogan, “does not have a small penis,” I mean, “The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun…” the rest of the slogan is on the back of the shirt, so if you’re a Republican and want to end the suspense, you’ll have to walk around the wearer to find out the rest of that sentence.

Yesterday, two volunteer security guys in Texas took out a man with a shotgun….AFTER he killed two people. Well, yay and skippitydoo. Does this prove the good guy with a gun worked out? Not for two of those people.

In 2017 at a church in Sutherland Springs, Texas, a shooter armed with a semi-automatic rifle was pursued and injured by a “good guy with a gun” before he took his own life…after 26 were killed and an additional 20 were injured. The “good guy with a guy” chose to pursue his Rambo fantasy instead of helping those wounded.

Republicans tell us that the “good guy with a gun” prevented more deaths from happening. But in Sutherland Springs, maybe the good guy could have saved more lives if he had checked on the wounded.

The fantasy doesn’t always work out. While gun nuts highlight the rare success of a “good guys with a gun,” they don’t point out the failures. I bet none of your crazy, lunatic, rabid gun fetishists uncles have ever mentioned Emantic Fitzgerald Bradford Jr. Who’s he? He was a “good guy with a gun” who tried to stop a shooting at a mall in Alabama when another “good guy with a gun” shot and killed him. Did I mention Emantic Fitzgerald Bradford Jr was black?

The truth is, even with your Rambo lessons, if you’re packing heat then you’re more likely to shoot yourself than a bad guy. Or, you’re more likely to be shot by police who can’t tell the difference between you and the bad guy. Even if you’re wearing that shirt, the cops will have to walk behind you to find out the end of that sentence. Maybe you should develop a shooting/spinning maneuver. Or, you, despite your Rambo classes, will shoot an innocent bystander or you’ll get shot by another “good guy with a gun.”

Here’s a fact that’s hard to debunk: If you don’t have a gun, it’s really hard to shoot someone.

A 2017 National Bureau of Economic Research study revealed that right-to-carry laws increase, rather than decrease, violent crime. Higher rates of gun ownership correlate with higher homicide rates. And gun possession correlates with road rage. People feel a lot more froggy when they’re packing.

Having the gun fantasy is more deadly than safe. What would be safer for you, me, and even the gun fetishists who will probably end up shooting themselves are gun laws that make it harder for people to commit church shootings, thus eliminating the need for a “good guy with a gun.”

The truth is; The “good guys with guns” create more “idiots with guns.”

Support the cartoonist.

You can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print). I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Impeachment Civil War


cjones10072019

Donald Trump is losing his mind. He’s screaming at reporters, embarrassing us in front of visiting foreign leaders, lying, spreading conspiracy theories, encouraging his supporters to engage in violence, and promising not to accomplish anything with Congress (like you were totally expecting action on gun violence). OK, that sounds like a typical Wednesday for Trump, but the stress is still showing.

Trump has been on edge more than usual lately. Wednesday was filled with rage tweets and unhinged press meetings. The impeachment inquiry over his dirty dealings with Ukraine and abusing his office by withholding foreign aid unless that nation helps him destroy a political rival is unraveling Donald Trump.

He has accused House Intel Chairman Adam Schiff of “fraudulently fabricating a statement of the President of the United States,” and of committing treason. It’s a good thing for Trump that lying to the public isn’t treason or even illegal (his boy Corey Lewandowski brags about it). He also said Schiff should resign and that “he’s sick.” He ranted to the press that “Shifty Schiff” couldn’t carry Secretary of State Mike Pompeo’s “blank” strap. He said, “I won’t say it because they’ll say it was terrible to say. But that guy couldn’t carry his ‘blank’ strap.” Donald Trump wouldn’t say it because he believes “jockstrap” is a dirty word, but he tweeted out “bullshit.” Trump also misses that “couldn’t carry his jockstrap” is a term normally used in sports, and doesn’t fit in this context unless Mike Pompeo is required to wear an actual jockstrap (which I trust no one wants to carry).

Trump screamed that the “transcript” of his call with Ukraine’s president was “exact” and “word-for-word,” it wasn’t. It was a summary with a warning at the top that it was NOT a “transcript” meaning it’s not “exact” or “word-for-word.” In fact, it’s estimated that the summary only covers ten minutes of a 30-minute phone conversation.

Holding an article that actually was in The Times reporting Schiff learned about the outlines of the whistleblower’s concerns days before the complaint was filed, Trump said that was a scandal and Schiff “probably helped write it.” Never mind the fact that the White House also knew of the complaint and tried to bury it before it was filed. Afterward, he again called himself a “very stable genius.”

He rage tweeted at The Washington Post for reporting that he wanted a “moot” filled with snakes and alligators at the border wall (it was actually The New York Times that reported the story). Everyone assumes he meant “moat.”

He cried about the stock market being driven down because of impeachment talk, and that being exactly what the “Democrats want to do.” He tweeted, “They are willing to hurt the Country, with only the 2020 Election in mind.” On that subject, the S&P 500 gained 27% between Clinton’s impeachment inquiry and his acquittal. The stock market did drop during Nixon’s Watergate drama, but stocks were in a bear market, the nation was in a recession, and in an oil crisis.

Trump retweeted a meme inaccurately showing the counties he won reading, “Impeach this.” He even sent out an inaccurate tweet of the 2016 electoral score (it seems like he’d know since he was there). He’s argued his electoral victory is too big for him to be impeached and other Republicans have accused the Democrats of overturning an election. They forget that the election they’re overturning was won with help from Russian interference, Trump didn’t win the popular vote, and that Nixon was facing impeachment after an electoral victory much larger than Trump’s (Trump won 304 electoral votes. Nixon won 520. In case you’re a Republican, 520 is greater than 304). It doesn’t matter if it’s geographical, weather, or electoral, or a placemat you color in at Bob’s Big Boy, Trump is really bad with maps.

At a press conference with Finnish President Sauli Niinistö, Trump berated and bullied Reuters reporter Jeff Mason for asking what he hoped Ukraine’s president would do about Joe and Hunter Biden. Trump did a DeNiro and screamed, “Are you talking to me? Listen…We have the president of Finland. Ask him a question. Trump said the reporter was being rude for not asking the Finnish president a question, but when he did, Trump interrupted and answered for him. I think Mason should have said, “OK then. President Niinistö, what do you think Trump wanted Ukraine’s president to do about Joe and Hunter Biden?”

While screaming at Mason, Trump said the impeachment was based on a hoax, the media was “playing into the hoax,” called the press “fake news” and in “many cases, the corrupt media.”

Trump has demanded to interview the whistleblower saying he deserves to confront his accuser (he doesn’t). He’s accused the whistleblower of being a “partisan hack” and of committing treason along with those in the White House who have helped him. He has insinuated the whistleblower and those who have helped him should be put to death. He’s warned of a Civil War if he’s impeached.

Donald Trump doesn’t care if the nation burns if it saves his hide, or at least gets him good ratings. He’s never shown more concern for anything over himself. If he riles up Nazis, Klansmen, Fox News hosts, and MAGA-hat wearing gun nuts, so be it.

Finland’s president was asked by a Finnish reporter, not about raking leaves to prevent forest fires, but if he could detail what kind of favors Trump had asked him. As reports are coming in that Trump has asked leaders of Ukraine, Australia, Italy, and now England, to work as opposition researchers for his 2020 campaign, it was a fair question. A question Trump interrupted by rambling about how he’s been praised by Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh.

The Helsinki Times (in case you’re a Republican, Helsinki is the capital of Finland), published an article this morning with the headline, “Did Trump tweet throughout his entire meeting with Niinistö.” It’s a fair question since Trump tweeted ten times about impeachment during the two hours when he was meeting with Niinistö. For Niinistö’s sake, I hope the meeting wasn’t in the bathroom since the tweets were indicative of his poop tweets. That guy will never come back to America.

President Niinistö enjoyed visiting many sites while in Washington. Perhaps he got to see the U.S. Constitution, Lincoln’s stovepipe hat, or Mike Pompeo’s jockstrap. At the press conference, Niinistö may have even enjoyed throwing a little shade at Trump during his opening statement. He said, “Mr. President (sic), you have a great democracy. Keep it going on.” Unfortunately, Donald Trump is too slow to detect this sort of burn. He’ll notice it Sunday.

But about Niinistö’s statement on our democracy; there really is only one way to keep our democracy “going on.” Since Trump has delusions of being an authoritarian leader, attacks the rule of law constantly, is recruiting foreign nations to help his 2020 campaign after one helped his in 2016 (and Vladimir Putin “joked” about helping again in 2020 yesterday), and is encouraging his supporters to start a “civil war” if he’s impeached, the only way to keep it going on is to impeach Trump.

Let’s keep it going on.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

What Kind Of Flood?


cjones09272019

Honestly, when “breaking news” about Texas was announced on my TV Thursday, I half expected it to be another mass shooting.

While flooding is terrible, especially for Houston which is still recovering from a flood two years ago, it was kinda refreshing that breaking news out of Texas wasn’t about a mass shooting. This is where we are, folks.

If there’s one place in this nation where a large percentage of the population treats their guns like their babies, and even values them over the lives of children, it’s Texas.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Beto’s Gun Ban


CNN09152019

Here’s your cartoon for CNN’s weekly newsletter, Provoke/Persuade. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday for the rest of your life.

I admit it. The comments on my social media are mostly an echo chamber so I knew this one wouldn’t get that many shares. It’s gotten plenty of comments though.

A lot of people who do agree with Beto O’Rourke about going after assault rifles also believe he handed the GOP and Donald Trump a gift. But, there are also liberals who not only don’t have a problem with Beto saying this, but want it screamed from the rooftops. I think we can respectfully disagree. I mean, it’s not like we’re discussing Bernie.

One of my readers made a comment under this cartoon on my Facebook post. I liked it so much, I’m stealing it. Talking about how Republicans are more motivated to vote than Democrats, my friend Lex said, “90-year-old right-wing grannies will crawl to the polls. 110-year-old right-wing mummies will crawl out of their graves.”

I didn’t have to draw that many roughs for CNN this week. It was kinda like last week. Usually, we’re doing the ideas on Thursday but this week, we waited until Friday because of the debate. I was feeling some stress but this idea was approved by noon.

I felt I was only sending duds to my editors…and I was. So, I took a step back, which is hard to do when you’re feeling stressed to deliver and there’s a deadline. I took a shower and while there was soap in my hair and eyes, this hit me. You might, but I don’t normally think about Beto O’Rourke or guns when I’m wet and naked (Republicans think about guns and AOC).

I sketched out a rough while wearing a towel (the same thing happened with a song idea years ago, and I wrote the tune while wearing a towel). Within a couple minutes of receiving it, my editor approved it. He was probably fully clothed.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Inhaling The NRA


cjones09202019

Vaping has been promoted as safer than cigarettes. Now, with six deaths and hundreds of previously healthy teens and adults suddenly stricken with respiratory damage, all blamed on vaping, there’s talk of banning the battery-powered e-cigarettes in the United States.

Vaping has become very popular. It’s a way to smoke without the smoke. Some kids even sneak the devices and puff on them in classrooms. They come in all sorts of flavors, like mango, tangerine, creme, bubble gum, and even Fruity Pebbles. Now, with a push by Melania out of fear her son, Barron (who Trump referred to as “her son”), Donald Trump is proposing a ban on flavored e-cigarettes.

Vaping is not healthy. Granted, health professionals who tell you vaping is bad do acknowledge it’s safer than cigarettes. But, banning the flavors isn’t a solution. The health risk is not in the flavors. According to doctors who have studied the issue, the real risk appears to be vitamin E acetate, which is a derivative of THC-containing e-cigarettes, and other contaminants found in black market products. Banning the flavors is an effort to make us feel good that we’re doing something. By the way, we still haven’t banned actual cigarettes which kills 480,000 Americans a year. Vaping has been accused of killing six. Back in the 1980s, we banned lawn darts after they killed three children.

The thing is, like cigarettes, there are already bans on selling e-cigarettes to minors. That didn’t stop the tobacco companies from targeting minors with cartoon characters until all the states banned together and sued them in the 1990s.

The worldwide market for vaping products was estimated at about $11.5 billion in 2018. Sales of Juul, one of the top brands, rose more than 600% in a year to $16.2 million in 2017. While vaping is marketed to help people quit smoking actual cigarettes, it’s now being blamed for creating nicotine habits among young people. There was a decline in tobacco use among young people for several years until e-cigarettes came along. Now, the use of tobacco among kids has risen 38% in recent years.

So, with a feel-good ban coming, what are vaping companies to do? For starters, they should take about $30 million of that $11 billion or so they made in 2018 and put it into the Trump campaign. Maybe while lobbying in Washington they can stay at the Trump Hotel.

The National Rifle Association spent $30 million on the Trump campaign in 2016 (with some of that money coming from Russia). When Trump starts talking about restricting sales and background checks on guns, he’s mouthing off before Wayne LaPierre, the chief executive of the NRA has gotten to him. He’s talked big about background checks twice before backing off after the NRA has grabbed his ears. The Republican U.S. Senate is refusing to do anything about guns because they actually don’t know where Trump stands. It depends on what time it is.

Between 1999 and 2017, over 38,000 children died from gun violence. In 2018 alone, 73 children under the age of 12 were accidentally killed by guns. We banned lawn darts after three kids died. The lawn dart lobby sucks. Now, after six deaths that may not even be the fault of vaping is going to lead to the ban of flavored vaping. Why isn’t it “too soon” to talk about banning vaping? Where are the thoughts and prayers?

Donald Trump doesn’t care about vaping. He doesn’t even care about guns. He cares about the dollars and his ego. If for some reason the NRA decided to defend vaping and called Trump, he’d backtrack on his previous comments against vaping. His wife would never mention it again. It’d be like that time Ivanka tweeted criticism about Roy Moore then shut up after her daddy endorsed the pedophile.

Trump is owned by whoever spends money on him. It’s why Saudi Arabia can kill journalists without consequences. Hopefully, someday we’ll get to see his taxes and find out exactly how much Russia has invested in him. Trump is the most corrupt president in American history.

Don’t be surprised if in the future you see an overabundance of orange vape flavors. Just don’t inhale.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

A Real Tacky Cartoon


cjones09112019

Right-wing gun toters who love to call liberals “snowflakes” have a new issue to cry about. Walmart has kinda-sorta banned people from openly carrying guns in their stores. If you’re not a Walmart shopper, first off, good for you. But you may be asking right now, “Walmart allowed gun fetish whackos to skulk around their stores carrying guns?” Apparently, yes.

When you see someone who’s not a cop, walking around with a gun on their hip, they’re not telling you they’re about self-protection. They’re trying to convince the world around them, and themselves, they’re a badass and they’re not taking shit from anybody. If you see someone with an AK-47 strapped to their body, they’re telling you they have a very small penis. No matter the size of the gun, they’re all paranoid and delusional.

Talk to one of these gun worshippers on the internet and you’ll discover they’re convinced they’ll not only survive an active-shooter situation, but they’ll save the day, be the hero, and Hollywood will make a new series of Rambo movies about them. What they fail to understand is that these situations happen fast, they’ve never been in one before, and there’s no way for the police to tell them apart from the active shooter. And why should the cops be able to tell the difference? These people walking around with guns to “protect” themselves are probably hanging out on the same hate forums as the guys writing these pro-Trump, anti-immigration manifestos. You know they’re all voting for the same candidates and watching the same networks.

Now they get to be angry and butthurt with Walmart, which puts them in awkward situations. It’s not like they’re going to start shopping at Target (no pun intended) and ordering spiced lattes at Starbucks.

It goes further than just “asking” their customers not to creep around their stores with Uzis. Walmart will no longer sell handgun ammunition for the short-barrel rifle ammunition used for hunting rifles as well as military-style weapons (assault weapons). They will also stop selling handguns in Alaska, the last state where their stores sold them. If you carry a concealed weapon, Walmart will not ask you to refrain from doing so. And, how could they tell anyway? For all they know, you’re happy to see them.

On top of all that, Walmart is asking Congress to enact gun safety measures. Kroger (in case you don’t know, it is a grocery chain) has followed Walmart’s lead and are also “asking” customers not to open carry in their stores.

Fox News fucknut and blonde #37 Tomi Lahren was outraged. She said Walmart “just shot itself in the foot.” She’s probably mostly upset because she just released a brand new made-in-China “athleisure” line designed to be worn with firearms. Other conservatives were also howling.

It’s funny these conservatives are all about freedom and against government meddling in businesses but are outraged when one decides for itself what’s best for its employees and customers. They cheer when Hobby Lobby uses its owner’s religion to deny health insurance, but get upset at another business for restricting guns.

The thing is, Walmart has more recent experience with guns in their stores than Tomi Lahren could even imagine she has (which is not a fair example because just what the holy hell is she experienced in?). Last July, a former employee shot and killed two workers in one of their stores. Last month, a white nationalist Trump supporter killed 22 people in one of their El Paso stores.

There are a lot of legitimate reasons not to shop at Walmart (like political donations, low salaries, unfair hiring practices, cheap and crappy imported goods, killing small towns and businesses, only three open checkout lanes, creepy people, etc), but I support them on this decision. I also support their right to continue to sell guns for hunting. Most gun-control proponents aren’t against hunting rifles and shotguns. So if that’s the case, then why give Walmart a hassle over selling them? They stopped selling pistols (except in Alaska until yesterday) and assault weapons years ago.

I don’t expect this to hurt Walmart in the slightest with their customers. Walmart is like crack to people who shop there. They can’t quit it. Walmart’s greatest concern is Amazon.

Yesterday, Walmart’s owners showed they’re willing to confront their base. They showed they have bigger balls than Mitch McConnell, Donald Trump, and the entire Republican Party. Perhaps they should all walk around with enormous assault rifles to overcompensate.

Support the cartoonist.

As I noted in a previous cartoon, these are perilous times for political cartoonists. But you can help me continue to create cartoons, blogs, and videos by making a contribution. All support, large and small, is greatly appreciated. You can also support me by purchasing a signed print (8 1/2×11) for $40, or a signed poster (18×24) for $100 by clicking the PayPal button (just include a note if you’re purchasing a print). If you want to support but don’t want to use PayPal, you can send a contribution through the mail (address is on the contact page. Again, include a note for a print).I don’t plan on going anywhere and your support will help guarantee that. Whether you support, can’t. or just choose not to, please know that I am truly thankful that you visit my site and read my work.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.