George Washington

Mount Nevermore


Donald Trump is proud of the fact he doesn’t know much history and has never read a presidential biography. It wouldn’t matter if he had since he prefers to ignore facts and just make shit up. The president of the United States is proud to be ignorant which is even more of a fault when you’re also stupid.

Politico reports that during a visit to Mount Vernon (in case you’re a Republican and like Donald Trump, Mount Vernon was George Washington’s home) last April with French President Emmanuel Macron, Trump learned that our first president (in case you’re a Republican, that’s George Washington) was a major real-estate developer during his time. He wondered how rich he was, and according to three sources, why he didn’t name the compound after himself.

The sources reveal that Trump said, “If he was smart, he would’ve put his name on it. You’ve got to put your name on stuff or no one remembers you.” The VIPs’ tour guide for the evening, Mount Vernon president and CEO Doug Bradburn, told Trump that Washington did, after all, succeed in getting the nation’s capital named after him. “Good point,” Trump said.

Bradburn reportedly told several people that the French president and his wife were more knowledgeable about the history of the property than Trump. Trump was critical of the size of the rooms and stairs, but was impressed by Washington’s bed saying it was “a good bed to die in.”

In that city named after Washington where Trump lives, is a monument named after Washington, which Trump can see from the White House. Also in Washington, DC is George Washington University. Maybe from all of his billions, or more accurately, millions, Trump noticed Washington’s face on the one dollar bill.

As for remembering Washington, there is a state named after him (in case you’re a Republican, that’s Washington state). There are 31 counties and 241 towns named after Washington. There are at least twelve universities named after Washington. There are four forts named for Washington. The private residence of Queen Liliʻuokalani of Hawaiʻi is named after Washington. There are four geological features (mountains and lakes)  featuring the name “Washington.” There are nine parks and five neighborhoods named after Washington. It would be extremely difficult to count how many bridges, streets, parkways, highways, and circles are named “Washington.” There are monuments across the country to Washington. He is one of the four presidents on Mount Rushmore, where Trump’s likeness will NEVER be.

There are statues of Washington, not just in the United States, but in other countries including Peru, France, Colombia, Mexico, Venezuela, Thailand, Hungary, Argentina, and even the United Kingdom, who Washington led a revolution against.

I think it’s safe to say that we remember George Washington.

There are two differences between the stuff named after Trump and Washington. Most things named after Trump, from wine to steaks to magazines to airlines to casinos, etc, don’t exist anymore. Trump’s first term isn’t over yet and already several properties have removed his name (it’s like the number 13…or herpes. You don’t want it). The things still named after Trump, like Trump Tower and Donald Trump Jr., are abject failures. Most things named after George are still there.

The other difference is, most things named after Washington were chosen by other people. Washington didn’t put himself on the dollar bill or Mount Rushmore. Everything named after Trump was named by Trump. Trump has to name stuff after himself because no one else is going to do it. Another difference between the two men is that people debate if Washington was our very best president, but there won’t be any debate about who is our worst.

In the future, you won’t be able to find anything named after Trump, just like nobody names anything after Hitler.

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