Fifth Amendment

Trumpin’ The Fifth

Donald Trump testified in a court-ordered deposition yesterday in New York City, sitting across from state Attorney General Letitia James who’s been conducting a three-year civil investigation into whether he fraudulently inflated the value of his assets to secure loans and other benefits. In what The New York Times called an “unexpected twist,” Donald Trump refused to answer any of the questions, except one, and pleaded the Fifth.

It was NOT an “unexpected surprise.” So many people are shocked by Trump invoking the Fifth to questions in a court case because he’s attacked people in the past for doing the same thing. But we’ve known for decades that Donald Trump is a lying projecting racist orange hypocrite.

At one of his hate rallies in 2016 while running for the presidency with Putin’s help, he blasted aides to Hillary Clinton for exercising their constitutional right to invoke the Fifth Amendment in order to avoid self-incrimination. He said, “The mob takes the Fifth.” He asked his MAGAts rhetorically, “If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?”

At other rallies during that campaign, he said, “She lied to Congress under oath, and her staff has taken the Fifth Amendment and got immunity deals,” and “It’s worse than Watergate; it’s a bigger deal than Watergate.” And during his first debate with Hillary Clinton, he said taking the Fifth instead of answering questions was “disgraceful.”

Yesterday, Donald Trump invoked the Fifth, according to a person with inside knowledge, over 400 times. He only answered one question. His name, and we’re assuming he didn’t lie with that answer.

He opened with a prepared statement and called Ms. James, who was seated across from him, a “renegade prosecutor.”

After the deposition, he said, “I once asked, ‘If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?’ I now know the answer to that question.” He said that he was being targeted by lawyers, prosecutors, and the news media, and that left him with “absolutely no choice” but to do so.

So, does that mean Hillary Clinton (who never took the Fifth when she testified for 11 hours before the Benghazi Committee) and her staff were being targeted by lawyers, prosecutors, and the news media, or is this different?

Trump’s lawyers were smart to convince him not to answer questions because not only could have incriminated himself in the New York civil case, his fat mouth probably would have incriminated him in one of the other multitudes of ongoing investigations into Trump fuckery.

In addition to the investigation that triggered the F.B.I.’s search (stealing shit from the White House), federal prosecutors are questioning witnesses about his involvement in efforts to reverse his election loss (the coup attempt, election steal, and installing fake electors), and a district attorney in Georgia is investigating potential election interference on the part of Mr. Trump and his allies. And let’s not forget the House select committee investigating the white nationalist MAGA mob he sent to attack the Capitol.

Trump’s lawyers should get medals for being able to keep him from answering questions. It must have killed him not to shout out “fake news” or “but her emails” in response to some questions. I would also have expected him to cite an imaginary right or Trump privilege at some point of the questioning that enables him to cheat on taxes and loan applications.

It was also smart to make him plead the Fifth since it’s impossible for Donald Trump not to lie. This is a man who lied over 30,000 while he was president (sic).

But Trump citing the Fifth was not an “unexpected twist” as the Times described, because he’s done it before.

In 1990 during divorce hearings from the woman he recently planted at the first tee at Bedminster, Trump invoked the Fifth 97 times to questions that were mostly about other women. He wouldn’t admit to the court all the stuff he boasted about on an Access Hollywood bus (“grab them by the pussy”).

In 1998, after Bill Clinton admitted to his affair with Monica Lewinsky in a deposition for an investigation about an Arkansas land deal, Donald Trump, who was merely an entertaining grifter at the time, said, “I’m not even sure that he shouldn’t have just gone in and taken the Fifth Amendment.”

The only thing “unexpected” about Trump pleading the Fifth is that he was successful at it and didn’t just excrete a word salad at some point during the deposition. After the deposition, he made a complaint about how nice and expensive the Attorney General’s offices are while crime is running rampant in New York City.

Donald Trump has every right to invoke the Fifth Amendment and not incriminate himself because he has the exact same constitutional rights as the rest of us. And if he has the same constitutional rights as the rest of us, then our nation’s laws apply to him just like the rest of us.

Creative note: I get asked now and then about something a lot of readers don’t notice. When I have the same image in more than one panel, do I just copy and paste the image? Sometimes. It varies. When I don’t need them all to be exactly, I will redraw the image each time. But other times, I think the image needs to stay “mostly” consistent. It also depends on my mood and the feel of the cartoon. There are times when it’s actually easier to redraw the same image multiple times than copying and pasting.

Here’s my trick: For today’s cartoon, I drew Trump once and then copied and pasted it seven times. But, I didn’t copy and paste the finished Trump. I copied and pasted the rough. So…I went over all eight Trumps a second time with my pen. And then I added some cross-hatching and colored after that. I also redrew his hair for each panel. So, they’re not all exactly alike but they’re all in the same place.

My one rule about copying and pasting is, never to do it because it’s easier. Only do it if it’s better for the cartoon. Right after I finished typing all that, another cartoonist Facebook messaged me saying, “I admire so much that you drew all the Trumps individually in your most recent cartoon.” I should have just said, “thank you.”

Music note: I listened to two bands that blow my mind every time I listen to them, Kaiser Chiefs and Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

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Constitutional Irony

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I had this idea a couple months ago and put it aside. I may have even included it in one of my batches of roughs, so it’s possible you’ve already seen this idea. But after passing it over, I decided to save it for another day. I knew it was going to come up. I knew one of the Trump goons would testify and invoke his Fifth Amendment rights. Yesterday, that happened.

First, in case you’re a dum-dum, then you need to know what rights and protections are included in the Fifth Amendment. There are five. It gives you the right to a fair trial. It gives you the right to a jury trial. It protects you from double jeopardy (can’t be tried for the same crime twice). It protects you from the government taking your property without compensation. Finally, it protects you from self-incrimination.

Self-incrimination is when you open your mouth and rat on yourself, often unintentionally. If you’re stupid, you really want to plead the 5th. Pleading the fifth is what you do instead of answering a question from a cop, or in a courtroom setting…or while testifying before a Congressional hearing.

Instead of refusing to appear before the January 6th committee like his fellow Trump goons, Mark Meadows and Steve Bannon, Roger Stone chose to testify before the committee.

Roger Stone was Nixon’s fixer and then became Trump’s. He’s a dirtbag. He likes being a dirtbag. He recently offered to freeze his sperm for far-right racist democracy-hating conspiracy theorist antiSemitic Islamophobic Laura Loomer, who’s written hate pieces for Infowars and has been banned from everything from social media platforms to food apps (Uber probably won’t deliver to her house), Laura Loomer. She even got banned from CPAC. She called the 2019 Women’s March a “Nazi Organization,” and was taken away by security while shouting, “What about the Jews?” She once protested a Mexican restaurant for it being a Mexican restaurant.

Apparently, Roger Stone and Laura Loomer are planning to make the anti-Christ. There is a demon sperm! But how icky is Laura Loomer if even Roger Stone refuses to crawl on top of her?

Also, the next time the federal government has to raid Roger Stone’s house (yes, the next time because it’s happened before), I highly recommend, implore even, that the search team wear hazmat suits, maybe double up even. I would rather wade through flaming toxic sewage laced with ketchup while listening to Nickelback than have to handle Roger Stone’s frozen sperm. The only element more dangerous than Roger Stone’s frozen sperm is Roger Stone’s unfrozen sperm. If that shit’s in Florida, then we might just have to eradicate the entire state of Florida.

Stone testified before the committee for less than 90 minutes. It was that quick because he refused to answer any questions as he pleaded his Fifth Amendment right not to self-incriminate. And, that is his right.

Stone came out of the hearing lashing out at the committee. He said he invoked his Fifth Amendment right because “I am fully aware of the House Democrats’ long history of fabricating perjury charges.”

That’s a funny comment coming from a goon who committed perjury before Congress. Stone was convicted in federal court of obstructing Congress by lying about his efforts to contact WikiLeaks on behalf of the Trump 2016 presidential campaign. The Justice Department, Trump’s Justice Department, successfully argued Stone lied to Congress to protect Trump. Then, William Barr took over Trump’s Justice Department and tried to drop everything against Stone AFTER he was convicted. And then Donald Trump pardoned Roger Stone.

Yesterday, Roger Stone told the press, “I stress yet again that I was not on the Ellipse. I did not march to the Capitol. I was not at the Capitol and any claim, assertion, or even implication that I knew about or was involved in any way whatsoever with the illegal and politically counter-productive activities of January 6, is categorically false.”

Roger Stone is a liar. He’s always been a liar and he always will be a liar.

Roger Stone was in the capital on January 6. He hired (or they volunteered) Oath Keepers, a white nationalist hate group involved in the attack on the Capitol, as his personal security. Roger Stone promoted his appearance at a “Stop the Steal” rally on January 6 and raised money for it. Before the march to the Capitol, he stated his purpose there was to “lead a march to the Capitol.”

It’s like Austin Powers’ Swedish-Made Penis Enlarger Pump. “This is my bag, baby.” Committing an insurrection with white nationalists in order to overturn a democratic and fair election in order to destroy democracy and install a fascist unelected dictator is Roger Stone’s bag baby.

And that’s where the irony comes in. Roger Stone, like a coward, uses the very Constitution he tried to destroy to protect him.

I want our Constitution to give Roger Stone every right he’s entitled to…and I want the laws within the constitution to put Roger Stone, and all his fellow goons, in prison. There’s no pardon for Roger Stone this time.

Also, go watch The Omen. Don’t say I did not warn you.

Music note: I listened to Verbena while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: