Fascism

Great-Great-Fascist-Grandfather


Ron DeSantis may be a sniveling racist lying gaslighting homophobic fascist hypocrite, but his great-great-grandmother was a legit badass.

Luigia Colucci left Italy at the height of World War I. She set sail on a steamliner named Patria for the United States with two daughters while pregnant in 1917. She arrived at Ellis Island on February 21, 1917.

Italian immigration plummeted during the war from over 150,000 in 1914 to less than 18,000 when Luigia left Europe. The reason is German submarines torpedoed anything and everything out of the Atlantic Ocean during World War I, and in case you’re not a history buff, Italy was on the side of the allies against Germany during the first world war. But Luigia took on those German submarines to reach a land of better opportunities for her children and descendants. And she barely made it in.

While Luigia Colucci crossed the Atlantic Ocean, the U.S. Congress passed the Immigration Act of 1917. Among other restrictions on “undesirable” immigrants, it barred illiterate people from entering the United States. Luigia was illiterate. She barely made it in before the window closed. She was detained for a week because of her pregnancy before she was allowed to continue her journey to Pennsylvania to meet up with Ron DeSantis’ grandfather, another Italian immigrant, Salvatore Storti, who had been in the United States since 1904. There is no record of him returning to Italy.

If Luigia Colucci and Salvatore Storti were to enter the U.S. today pleading asylum, would Ron DeSantis deny them or fly them to Martha’s Vineyard for a political stunt? Probably not because they’re not from South America.

Would DeSantis chastise his great-great-grandmother for becoming a citizen through chain migration? Would he have called her baby born in the U.S. an “Anchor baby?” Would he have called her “undesirable” since she was illiterate and uneducated?

This isn’t a gotcha on DeSantis for his ancestors being immigrants to the United States. Just about all of us here are descendants of immigrants. The gotcha here is that Ron DeSantis is a hypocrite.

The people Ron DeSantis is flying to so-called sanctuary cities are here legally. They’ve requested asylum. They’re documented. Their next act will be contributing to the culture and melting pot of our nation. The greatest thing about our nation is our diversity. When whites are no longer the majority of this nation, it won’t be a tragedy. It’ll be the continuing evolution of our nation.

The irony is that the people DeSantis is using as political pawns came here to escape fascism in Venezuela. Now, they’re being victimized by a fascist in Florida.

The greatest threat to our nation is not immigration, legal or illegal. If we really wanna make America great again, let’s welcome these immigrants and deport fascists like Ron DeSantis.

Luigia Colucci braved the kaiser and his submarines to reach a better life for her and her descendants. Now, today’s immigrants have to brave her descendant.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Fascists Pardons


Ya’ know, for a bunch of fascists, they sure are whiny snowflake babies.

President Biden called out MAGA fascists in a major primetime address from Liberty Hall in Philadelphia.

Biden called out MAGA fascism as a threat to democracy and framed the midterm elections as a battle for the “soul of the nation.” He’s right. We could lose our nation if we put Republicans in power. Republicans have given up on democracy and have embraced fascism.

On January 6, 2021, Donald Trump sent white nationalist terrorists to overturn the election he lost. Donald Trump refused to grant a peaceful transfer of power. Nearly two years later, most Republicans still believe Trump won despite the lack of ANY evidence. The GOP has elected (irony) election deniers as their nominees in the upcoming midterms. The Republican Party has changed laws in states with GOP-majority legislatures making it harder for minorities to vote. In Florida, the Republican governor is attempting to outlaw liberal thoughts. Republicans are making it illegal for schools to teach history that they claim makes white people feel bad for being white. Republicans are banning books. And then they’re crying that some of them are being called fascists by the president.

Biden actually went out of his way not to call ALL Republicans “semi-fascists.” He made it clear it was only for the MAGA element. He was being overly kind. But, you knew Republicans and the Fox News fucks were going to cry about it because they’re all entitled whiny babies.

White Christian conservatives believe they are the most persecuted of any group in world history. If you don’t believe me, just ask one of them.

Despite the president’s clarity, Tucker Carlson lied about what the president said.

Tucker claimed the president believes “anyone who disagrees with Joe Biden is by definition a fascist” and suggested the president considers all Republicans semi-fascists. Carlson then claimed that Biden’s comments were “effectively a declaration of war against half the country.”

Tucker finished up with, “What do we do to fascists? Well, we fought a war and killed them.”

Except now, Tucker. Now, you guys award and praise them. You lie for them. You cover up for them.

Sidenote: Motherfuckers on Fox News need to stop calling Donald Trump “The President.” sure, you can refer to him as “President Trump (sic),” or if you’re in the same room with him, then you address him as “Mr. President, (sic)” or when pointing at him in the same room, then you can say, “The President (sic)” if it makes you feel warm and toasty. For example, you can say to someone, “Do you hear that squishy sound when Trump walks? It’s because The President just shit his diapers.”
But when you’re on TV, don’t say “The President” when referring to Trump because he’s not the president. Don’t say “The President” when you’re referring to Carter, Bush, or Obama. You should only say “The President” when you’re talking about the president. We only have one president at a time and right now, Joe Biden is THE president. Sidenote over.

I heard one Republican analyst state that Republicans heard Biden call all of them fascists. So they’re hearing what he didn’t say. Another whined that the president (this is how you use it, kids) isn’t unifying, which is something the president ran on. But since the campaign when Biden called for unity, there was an insurrection and Republicans used lies about election fraud to make it harder for a portion of the nation to vote.

But the president is right. The MAGA portion of the Republican Party are fascists. They are willing to install Trump as a dictator, even if he doesn’t win. They’ll actually claim that stealing an election and overthrowing the government is democracy. While the president said it’s just the MAGA portion of the GOP that’s poisonous to democracy, the majority of the GOP is MAGA. The majority of the Republican Party shoves and eats fascist bullshit.

And Donald Trump made the president’s point. Donald Trump claimed he’s paying legal fees for some of the white nationalist terrorists who tried to overturn the election and install him as a dictator. I’m sure the money isn’t actually coming out of Trump’s wallet, but from his “Save America” PAC, which isn’t advertising that funds will go to pay legal fees for terrorists. I seriously doubt Trump is spending his own money. He takes his supporters’ money, he doesn’t give them his.

Trump also gave another great reason not to elect him president. Trump is promising to give pardons to the white nationalist terrorists who tried to destroy our democracy.

Donald Trump calls Vladimir Putin a genius and wants to pardon terrorists who attacked our nation. He also stole classified government documents, which many of are still missing. Joe Biden, the president, calls Putin a war criminal and tells fascists they’re fascists.

It’s clear which of the two men is a patriot and which is the traitor. In case you’re slow, Trump is the traitor.

The Republican crybaby analyst may be correct and the president’s words turn them off and alienate them. But, I like that the president is speaking the truth. I like that he’s calling it what it is.

You can put me squarely in the camp of Fuck Those Fascists.

Music note: I listened to Jimi.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Governor Crackers


I shouldn’t have to write a long blog for you today since it’s nearly 4 p.m. on a Sunday and all I’ve done since I woke up has been working on cartoons, videos, and other in-house stuff for my little syndication business, but since I wing these things anyway, let’s see what happens.

I’ve been meaning to work “woke sausage” into a cartoon for over a week. It was two weeks ago that the story broke about how Cracker Barrel, not an establishment that usually comes to mind first when thinking of enlightenment, introduced plant-based sausage. The new product is from Impossible Foods, a company that makes meat substitutes out of plant-based products. It’s fake meat, kids.

Veggie meat has been around for a few decades now and its popularity is increasing. As Shaun’s mom said in “Shaun of the Dead,” a film heavy with brilliant foreshadowing, “These days, a lot of people don’t eat meat.” That movie came out in 2004 and vegetarianism was on the rise way before then.

So, when Burger King introduced their Impossible Whopper, I took notice and thought it was an interesting turn of events. Once on a road trip with my girlfriend at the time and her brother, we stopped at Burger King and he, being a vegetarian, got an Impossible Whopper. I was curious enough to ask, “How is it?” He liked it. I wasn’t curious enough to try one myself. I noticed that the calories and prices were the same, if not more than a regular meat Whopper. So, the only real reason to get one is out of kindness toward animals, though buying a veggie burger at a place that still serves meat is only keeping the cow and chicken murderers in business.

I’ve tried plant-based stuff a few times and to be honest, I’ve yet to eat one that I thought tasted just like meat…or that didn’t make me want to throw up. I don’t like them. But, if you like them, then you do you. I don’t care. So, when Burger King introduced their Impossible Whopper, it didn’t piss me off. I didn’t boycott Burger King over something I will never order. The only reason I see for not going to Burger King is that they tend to suck with everything they offer.

Disclaimer: It doesn’t take me long to get tired of Burger King and not order from there for a year or two, but I had a huge hankering for a Whopper yesterday, a real Whopper, and I ordered one with onion rings. It was delicious and I can’t stop thinking about it.

Two weeks ago, Cracker Barrel introduced an Impossible Sausage and my first thought was, “Everything on your regular menu is bland as fuck, so how good can that fake sausage be?” Seriously. Have you ever been to Cracker Barrel? I used to go all the time because my mother loved it, but it’s like they don’t use any spices. It’s the blandest place in the world. I think their food is boring (although, their breakfast is OK but I would still prefer an independent diner). That’s probably why you usually only see old white people there who believe ketchup is a vegetable.

If Cracker Barrel was a rock band, it would be Train.

But, when Cracker Barrel introduced their Impossible Sausage, right-wing troglodytes got pissed and started referring to it as “woke sausage.”

On CB’s Facebook post introducing the fake sausage, commenters wrote, “I just lost respect for a once great Tennessee company,” and “Not going to happen! Cracker Barrel used to be so good, we looked forward to eating in them but not anymore.” From these reactions, you’d think Cracker Barrel was run by Hillary Clinton and deep-state Satanic Democratic Party pedophiles serving baby parts on pizza.

It’s weird that one offering on the menu has destroyed a lifetime of loyalty to a business. I mean, maybe they could still go and not order the food they don’t want to eat. Cracker Barrell still offers the rest of their menu, right? I’m sure they still have tasteless meatloaf made from real meat (that’s the last thing I had at a Cracker Barrel and it was dull).

When I saw this story, I thought “woke sausage” was too good to pass up…but then Mar-a-Lago got searched by the FBI and I had to basically drop everything else. I thought my opportunity to lampoon woke sausage had passed…then Ron DeSantis helped me out.

On Thursday, a federal judge declared a Florida law championed by Governor Ron DeSantis that restricts race-based conversation and analysis in business and education unconstitutional. DeSantis and his goons referred to this law as the “Stop Woke Act.”

It’s interesting that Republicans love to cite the Constitution and claim that liberals are stripping rights away, but the only people taking rights away from Americans are Republicans. How do you describe yourself as a constitutionalist when you shit on the Constitution? A good way to make sure we don’t end racism is by outlawing race-based conversations and history lessons on our racist past from slavery to segregation to Donald Trump’s “build the wall.”

Look at the title of the law itself. “Stop Woke Act.” How can you ban wokeness? That’s banning thought. DeSantis’ law was stopping what he called “pernicious” ideology exemplified by Critical Race Theory. But here, he wasn’t just banning it in public schools, but in universities and private businesses.

For the record, Republicans use the word “woke” more than liberals do. Most liberals use it in jest, not as a self-description. If you try to understand the position of people who have life experiences that are impossible for you to experience, Republicans will call you “woke” like it’s a bad thing. I’m not sure how that applies to veggie sausage.

The judge said the law, as applied to diversity, inclusion, and bias training in businesses turns the First Amendment “upside down” because the state is barring speech by prohibiting discussion of certain concepts in training programs.

He wrote in his ruling, “If Florida truly believes we live in a post-racial society, then let it make its case. But it cannot win the argument by muzzling its opponents.” That’s exactly how Republicans want to win arguments, by banning your free speech so they can lie their goon balls off.

The law prohibits teaching or business practices that contend members of one ethnic group are inherently racist and should feel guilt for past actions committed by others. It also bars the notion that a person’s status as privileged or oppressed is necessarily determined by their race or gender, or that discrimination is acceptable to achieve diversity.

There’s this belief among Republicans that if you teach about this nation’s racist past, then you’re making white people feel bad, and we need laws that ban making white people feel shame. In Ron DeSantis’ fascist Florida, he’s extending it to businesses.

It’s a fact that black Americans face more discrimination than White Americans. This law bans that from being confronted. It bans businesses from recognizing it in order to end it. It basically bans discrimination bans. If your business doesn’t discriminate against a job applicant because of race, color, religion, sex, sexual orientation, or sexual identity, then it’s probably violating fascist Ron DeSantis’ Stop Woke Act.

What happened to the GOP being the party that’s friendly to business? Aren’t they supposed to be the party that fights against government regulations on businesses? Ron DeSantis has declared war on everyone, every educator, and every business that doesn’t blindly goosestep behind him.

DeSantis is trying to be Florida’s Mussolini and he’s trying to out-fascist Donald Trump. Politically, it’s working. Republicans love this fascist shit. I hear Republicans all the time say how much they want to move to Florida because of Ron DeSantis. Someone tell the alligators the buffet is coming.

Republicans are all about taking away freedom, whether it’s speech they don’t like to hear or sausage they don’t want to eat. I can tell them what to do with their sausage.

Music Note: I listened to Kaiser Chiefs while drawing this. Yeah, I know. Again. They have a lot of stuff I haven’t listened to yet.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

My Favorite Fascists


Less than two weeks ago, Hungary’s fascist Prime Minister gave a speech in Romania where he denounced a “mixed-race world” and endorsed the racist Great Replacement Theory. His government has ended the legal recognition of transgender people. His party’s proposed legislation to end “positive LGBTQ” images in movies, television, and advertising. His legislation banning any mention of “gay” in Hungarian schools was the model for Ron DeSantis’ own hate bill.

In a speech in 2018, Orban said, “We must state that we do not want to be diverse and do not want to be mixed: we do not want our own color, traditions and national culture to be mixed with those of others. We do not want this. We do not want that at all. We do not want to be a diverse country.”

In case you still don’t find the guy charming, he’s also antisemitic. He’s described George Soros, a favorite punching bag for Republicans and a Hungarian native, as someone who “hates Christianity.”

Tucker Carlson loves Orban and even broadcast a few of his shows from Hungary’s capital, Budapest. Donald Trump endorsed Orban. Last Thursday at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) in Dallas, Victor Orban was met with thunderous applause.

And why wouldn’t they greet Orban with applause? He’s practically saying the quiet parts out loud. In addition to Soros, he also denounced immigration, abortion, LGBTQ rights, and “the Woke Globalist Goliath.” Who taught him that word, “woke?”

The gang that tried to destroy our democracy on January 6, 2021, is holding parties with fascist leaders as speakers. And they do love them some fascism. In Arizona, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Nevada, the Republican nominees to oversee state elections deny the legitimacy of Biden’s election victory.

In Florida, Governor Ron DeSantis, who’s gone to war with Disney over his Don’t-Say-Gay bill, has legalized running over black protesters, fought every public safety effort to end the COVID pandemic, and has scolded students for wearing face masks has now decided to suspend an elected Democratic state attorney and replace him with one of his own choosing.

DeSantis suspended Andrew Warren, the state attorney for Hillsborough County for refusing to enforce “any prohibition on sex-change operations for minors” or laws related to abortion. The thing is, Warren hasn’t done any of that yet. He was suspended for his statements.

A governor can suspend an official for refusing to follow the law, but not for his thoughts. This is what DeSantis did, furthering his fascist profile for his upcoming presidential run. He literally replaced the voters’ choice for a state attorney, and he did it without a riot or goading Mike Pence to help him.

Warren was frog-marched out of his office by Florida State Police, who have become DeSantis’ personal goon squad, and said, “It’s something you would see happen in Russia or China or North Korea where the king sends in his police” to remove an official from office without “due process” or “basis,” he said.

Or, you’d see it in Hungary. In 2021, Hungary passed a law banning sex education involving L.G.B.T.Q. topics. Ron DeSantis’ press secretary said, “We were watching the Hungarians,” and were inspired by their legislation” in regards to Florida’s Don’t-Say-Gay bill.

Republicans aren’t shying away from fascism. They’re praising and openly emulating fascists. Pretty soon, people are going to be swimming from Florida to migrate to Cuba.

We only have two powerful political parties in this country. The Democratic Party and the Fascist Party. The fascists are overruling elections.

Music note: I listened to some 90s alt radio.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

The Fix


CjonesRGB12232021

One funny thing about Republicans and MAGAts is that they think they’re the good guys. But then again, Nazis thought they were the good guys too.

Donald Trump’s acceptance speech at the 2016 Republican National Convention included the line, “only I can fix it.” Every candidate campaigns on the message he or she is the best person for the job, but Donald Trump was saying a line drafted for fascists. It was the kind of thing Saddam Hussein would have said. And what exactly was Donald Trump promising to fix? What “greatness” was “make America great again” referring to?

I didn’t underestimate Donald Trump as much as I underestimated Republicans. I never believed they’d nominate and follow an imbecilic racist used car salesman with a reality TV show, less enough a fascist. I never thought they’d not only trade in their party to become a cult but also their country. And I never thought Republicans would support overturning an election and an attack on our nation. I mean, these are the “support our troops” fuckers. These are the guys who used to worship Reagan and praise him for ending the Cold War against the Soviet Union. These are the people who told us for decades Russia was the bad guy and our enemy. These were the biggest yakkers about liberty and freedom.

That’s the thing about nationalism. It starts with a pledge, then attempts to outlaw flag desecration, and then efforts to make a national language. After that comes the killing of a press and laws banning insults to an orange gropenfuhrer.

So now when I start to dismiss the possibility of a second American civil war, I have to stop and remember all those other stupid things I initially disregarded.

The people who would start a civil war will claim they’re trying to destroy the nation to save it. That’s what they said when they elected a mango fascist in 2016. They claimed they were saving democracy when they tried to overturn an election and attempt an American coup. They said they were saving our democracy by installing a fascist dictator. They claim they’re saving democracy by limiting who can vote. Half of Congress doesn’t want to investigate a coup attempt on this nation. It can’t happen here? It’s happening.

“No one wants to believe that their beloved democracy is in decline, or headed toward war. But, if you were an analyst in a foreign country looking at events in America — the same way you’d look at events in Ukraine or the Ivory Coast or Venezuela — you would go down a checklist, assessing each of the conditions that make civil war likely. And what you would find is that the United States, a democracy founded more than two centuries ago, has entered very dangerous territory.”

That’s from Barbara F. Walter, a political scientist at the University of California at San Diego. She just published a book titled “How Civil Wars Start.”

Walter serves on a CIA advisory panel called the Political Instability Task Force that monitors countries around the world and predicts which of them are most at risk of deteriorating into violence. This book is her own study and not that of the CIA. Guess who’s on that list.

Walter writes, “We are closer to civil war than any of us would like to believe.”

The United States has already gone through what the CIA identifies as the first two phases of insurgency. The “pre-insurgency,” “the incipient conflict,” and the one we haven’t got to yet, “open insurgency.” But many believe the third phase, “open insurgency,” already began on January 6 with the attack on the United States Capitol by Donald Trump’s white nationalist terrorists.

Walter writes that the United States is no longer technically a democracy but an “anocracy.” That means it’s between a democratic state and an autocracy. Armed violence and sudden changes of leadership are common in anocracies. A lot of lies, bullshit, conspiracy theories, and “fake news” is used to manipulate people in anocracies. Who else is an anocracy? Russia is one that will make Republicans say, “well, alright then. Cool.” But other anocratic nations compared to the United States may not excite them as much. They include Somalia, Uganda, Zimbabwe, Nigeria, Cambodia, Burma, Thailand, and Ukraine. Trump would call several of these “shithole” countries.

I grew up with the idealism that America was the greatest country on the planet. We’re better than everyone else. We were taught there was no possibility of a civil war in this nation even though we already had one.

We’re not the worst, but the United States is not the best nation in the world either. You can chuck all that rah-rah “Murica!” cheerleader bullshit out the window. Sure, love your country, but don’t be blind. Our nation is led by a bunch of fundamentalist religious zealots. At this very moment, the majority of people in this nation have a dying tree inside their homes to celebrate their “savior’s” birthday, on a day that’s not really his birthday. Sixty percent of Americans believe a guy named Noah built an ark after being directed to do so by God, put two of each species on it, and then the entire Earth was flooded for 44 days.

Hell, Norwegian cruise lines can’t even return to port with all the passengers it departed with, and they can’t blame it on “eaten by lions.”

In 2020, the Democracy Index (compiled by the Economist Intelligence Unit) gave the United States a score of 7.92. But the freeist nation in the world didn’t have the best score. Who scored better than we did?

Nations scoring higher than the United States on the Democracy Index include Canada, Austria, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Luxembourg, Netherlands, Norway, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland, United Kingdom, Chile, Costa Rica, Uruguay, Australia, Japan, New Zealand, South Korea, and Taiwan. But, we do win the most Olympic medals as long as ice isn’t involved.

The prediction of another civil war in the United States isn’t that it’ll be like the first one, a line dividing the nation with organized armies on both sides. No, it’s predicted to look more like Iraq’s insurgency. The opposition to American democracy will look less like the Confederacy and more like ISIS. And we may not even notice when it begins as it’ll probably just look like a daily mass shooting.

An Economist/YouGov poll conducted last week found that nine percent of Republicans believe it’s “very likely” Donald Trump will be reinstated to the presidency…before the end of the year. In case you don’t own a calendar, that’s less than two weeks from now after Jesus’ birthday Maybe it’ll happen on Jesus’ birthday. Trump does need a new running mate.

Nine percent of the GOP says it’s “somewhat likely” that Trump will be reinstated before Baby New Year gets here. Another 15 say they’re “not sure.” What’s crazier is that ten percent of Democrats think it’s “very likely” Trump will be reinstated within the next two weeks. Jesus! Not you, Jesus.

You may think these are not high numbers, but in believing U.S. democracy is going to die, I think they’re very high. And with half of Congress trying to cover up the Trump administration’s coup attempt, I at least believe democracy will suffer another attack and the insurrection will find support within our government…and within the media.

Eighty-two percent of Fox News viewers believe Trump won the election and it was stolen from him. Hell, 97 percent of One American News Network viewers believe the same thing, but to be fair, 97 percent of OANN viewers isn’t a lot of people. That probably means more Fox News viewers believe in The Big Lie than in Jesus. Jesus! Sorry again, Jesus.

An insurrection? A civil war? It can’t happen here, right? Donald Trump is claiming he can be “reinstated,” and as he learned last January, all an insurrection needs is a little push.

American democracy? Only Trump can “fix” it.

Also, if my comments on Jesus, his birthday, the ark, the tree, etc, don’t piss off as many people as my Mike Nesmith cartoon did, then that means more people believe in the Monkees than in Jesus.

Music note: I listened to the Beach Boys while drawing today’s cartoon.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 18 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Bannon’s Contempt


Cjones10252021

The day before the Trump insurrection on January 6 that was an attempt to overturn a legal election, stop congress from doing a task mandated by the United States Constitution, and install Donald Trump as a fascist dictator, Steve Bannon was on his radio show (yes, he has a radio show) telling his white nationalist audience, “You made this happen and tomorrow it’s game day. So strap in. Let’s get ready. All hell is going to break loose tomorrow. It’s all converging, and now we’re on the point of attack tomorrow.”

Really, I’m shocked he didn’t start singing.

The hate will come out…tomorrow. You can bet your bottom dollar…tomorrow…there’ll be fascism and treason…tomorrow…
Tomorrow…I love ya’…fascism…tomorrow…skippidee-dee..

Anyway, it sounds like Steve Bannon might have kinda knew something was going to go down on January 6. So, the House Committee investigating the Trump insurrection wants to talk to Steve Bannon, but Bannon isn’t cooperating. He is in direct violation of a congressional subpoena. That is illegal. Steve Bannon was the head honcho of Breitbart, a racist online “news” source for white nationalists, Nazis, and other various hate groups. He was the CEO late in the game of Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign (after his previous campaign mangers were let go for assaulting women and being a Russian mole). He was Trump’s chief strategist in the early days of his administration because there was concern Stephen Miller couldn’t carry all the racist agenda by himself (border wall, Muslim ban, shithole countries, banning all non-white immigration, hating Mexicans, etc). He received one of Trump’s last-second pardons for charges in mail fraud and money laundering in tricking racists into making contributions to build Trump’s hate wall on the border.

Bannon is refusing to comply with a subpoena from the committee, citing executive privilege. But the thing is, Bannon is not president, so how can he claim executive privilege? He also wasn’t a part of the Trump administration at the time of the attack and he isn’t Donald Trump’s lawyer so, how can he claim executive privilege? Finally, Donald Trump isn’t president (pause for “YAY!!!!”), so how can he claim executive privilege?

A lot of people say Steve Bannon is a genius, I mean…scamming racists using their own hate against them for profit was pretty fucking clever, but he also thought racist pedophile and mall-food-court-Jamba-Juice-teenage-talent-scouting aficionado Roy Moore would make a great U.S. senate candidate in Alabama. I think Bannon might be wrong with his claim of executive privilege…but he may know this and be gambling. Gambling for what?

Ya’ see, he doesn’t have to do anything but this helps build his notoriety. He’s gambling on banking off this. If he loses, he can go to prison. After prison, he’ll probably still bank off it.

Steve Bannon is like Ted Cruz. They enjoy being hated. They enjoy being reviled. They enjoy trolling and pissing off decent people. They both enjoy disgusting people. They both enjoy every time a child sees them and shrieks in horror. By the way, if you like making this your public profile, you’re probably on the wrong side of everything. But, being on the wrong side of everything sells with the white nationalist Trump base. Did I mention the border-wall scheme? The pitch there was: You can trust Steve Bannon because he hates the same people you do. Imagine what sort of racist shit he can sell after he’s the guy the Deep State sent to prison for standing up for Trump fascism. Maybe Mike Lindell should consider this to help sell his shitty pillows.

Steve Bannon can comply with the subpoena and still not cooperate. Even though he tried to destroy the United States Constitution, he still has the Constitutional right not to self-incriminate. He can plead the 5th and go home. I mean, he might have to sit there all day avoiding questions, but that’ll be nine hours of his ugly mug on TV. As a strategist, he really should go. It would be good for the hate business. But maybe he’s gambling on Trump-tiki-torch sales after prison.

Bannon is probably hoping he can squirm through all this until Republicans take control of Congress in January 2023, that is, if they win the House in the 2022 midterms. He’s already on the vote-fascism tour. He had a hate rally with fellow racist Trump pardonee Milo Yiannopoulos in Maryland this week. It was canceled because Baltimore didn’t want to be swarmed with tiki-torch Nazis which would ruin everyone’s weekend.

Yesterday, the House committee voted to send a referral to the Department of Justice to criminally prosecute Steve Bannon. This is very rare and if it all goes to play, Bannon could spend up to a year in jail.

Steve Bannon is still pushing The Big Lie that Trump won. In fact, he’s still pushing for an insurrection. He recently said on his podcast, the War Room, “We control the country. We’ve got to start acting like it. And one way we’re going to act like it, we’re not going to have 4,000 shock troops ready to go, we’re going to have 20,000 ready to go.”

Does that sound like Night of the Long Knives or what? At a recent rally for Virginia gubernatorial candidate Glenn Youngkin, Bannon with others pledged to a U.S. flag they claimed was waved at the January 6 insurrection. The Nazis did the same thing, pledging to a bloody Swastika flag after the failed Putsch Revolt against the legitimate German government in 1923.

Steve Bannon wants to destroy the government and democracy. He’s making a pitch for a fascist racist state he says will governor for 100 years (Hitler predicted a Nazi state for 1,000 years). I doubt this guy can testify without voicing a lot of his fascist and racist views.

Steve Bannon needs to testify before Congress, but he’s a terrorist sympathizer and hates democracy. He’s a Nazi-wannabe. I’m a wanna-see-Bannon-in-prison.

This nation is under attack from fascists planning another insurrection and a civil war. As if the January 6 insurrection didn’t reveal that, but Bannon’s testimony will expose it even more.

Lock him up. Let’s lock up all the Nazis.

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Notes on my book: Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are ZERO copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. A new shipment will come in soon. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

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Fascist Putter


Cjones07152021

Last night, I binged every episode of the brand new Netflix series, “How to become a Tyrant.” It’s not an indepth look at different regimes, but if you had to take a test on any of them, it would be a decent Cliff Notes on each of the dictators it focused on. It’s narrated by Peter Dinklage who did a really good job with it. If you’re a history buff, you will have already read about most of this, but there were still a few things that were new to me, like Walter Duranty. Who that? Walter Duranty was the Moscow bureau chief for The New York Times from 1922 to 1936. He idolized Joseph Stalin, who gave him exclusive interviews and tours of how there was no famine in Ukraine…which Duranty proceeded to write about, basically echoing Stalin’s propaganda. For this, Duranty won the Pulitzer Prize. You also learn that Kim Jong Il invented the cheeseburger. Did you know Kim Jong Il invented the cheeseburger? They do in North Korea where they can’t even get cheeseburgers. When you watch “How to become a Tyrant,” you see so many tactics that were and still are being used by Donald Trump. While the series mentions several dictators, it’s focus is on the North Korea family dynasty, Gadhafi, Saddam Hussien, Stalin, Idi Amin, and Hitler, who we heard this week had been praised by Donald Trump. The one person the series never mentions is Donald Trump. It was six episodes. They should have made it seven.

When you watch “How to become a Tyrant,” you see so many tactics that were and still are being used by Donald Trump. While the series mentions several dictators, its focus is on the North Korea family dynasty, Gadhafi, Saddam Hussien, Stalin, Idi Amin, and Hitler, who we heard this week had been praised by Donald Trump. The one person the series never mentions is Donald Trump. It was six episodes. They should have made it seven.

To be a successful dictator, you need to be a narcissist. You also need to build a cult of personality around yourself, which you cannot do if you’re not a narcissist. You need to proclaim, “Only I can fix it.” Other tactics include attacking a free press, facts, elections, and science. North Korea claims the Kims are such perfect specimens, they don’t poop. Stalin suppressed scientific research and placed folklore beliefs over genetics. Donald Trump told us a pandemic wasn’t happening and we should all take hydroxychloroquine and bleach.

Most importantly, you need to make you and your people the underdogs who have been persecuted. You need a common enemy to blame all your woes upon. Does any of this sound familiar?

Idi Amin blamed the British, and he had a point. Then, he blamed Indians. When he had kicked them all out of the nation, he needed a new foil. He picked the nation of Zaire and he invaded their country…which backfired big time. America is a great foil which was used by Idi Amin, North Korea, Gadhafi and Saddam…who also blamed Jews. Hitler blamed people in his own nation for selling them out with the Treaty of Versailles…and Jews. Stalin was a big fan of describing anyone who criticized him, such as religious leaders, as the “enemy of the people.” Does that sound familiar? Donald Trump began his presidential campaign with attacking Mexicans. “They don’t send us their best. They send rapists and murderers,” is something I can hear being said by Idi Amin, Saddam Hussein, Hitler, Gadhafi, and so many others.

The biggest thing you need to be a dictator is hate. When you follow a dictator, he justifies your hate, tells you it’s OK to hate, and you have permission to publicly reveal your hatred. Before Trump, we didn’t have Nazis parading through our cities.

With the cult of personality, the cult leader tells his people they can’t trust anyone but him…and then they believe him.

My friend, Gordon, called me a few days ago and said, “Hey, let’s get cheeseburgers.” Sounded good to me, so I went to meet him outside my apartment building, where there is a restaurant. Sitting on the patio of the restaurant while I was waiting on Gordon were three older people. The traffic made hearing most of their conservation difficult, but I heard the old man say, “I don’t trust anyone except Donald Trump.” How dare that fucker say that right outside of my home. You’ll be glad to know I let it go and didn’t walk over there and rub my liberal cooties all over him while shoving his face into his huevo rancheros. Oh, yeah. It’s a Mexican restaurant. Go figure.

That MAGAt probably believes Donald Trump won the election. He believes it because Donald Trump told him so. If you believe Donald Trump won the election, congratulations. You are in a cult. But, if you follow Trump, we already know you’re in a cult. We’ve known it for a long time.

The Trump cult describes its critics as “Never Trumpers” and anyone who isn’t a Trumper is the enemy. To be a Never Trumper is a sin. Donald Trump has supported claims he was sent by God. If that is true, then we are NOT God’s favorite country.

Do you think that cheeseburger claim by the North Koreans is ridiculous? It is but it’s no more ridiculous than believing Donald Trump won the election. It’s no more ridiculous than saying, “I only believe Donald Trump.” Donald Trump did everything he could to become a fascist dictator. He failed and he was only a fascist president (sic).

Donald Trump claimed an election he lost was rigged. He claims he won. He called state officials and told them to “find the votes.” Then, he ordered his followers, like brown shirts, to attack the Capitol and stop the Constitutionally-mandated certification of the election.

Now, there’s a report that Trump praised Hitler and had to be told by his then-chief-of-staff, John Kelly, not to do so in public. It’s pretty bad when racist John Kelly tells you not to praise Hitler. Trump denies this but keep in mind, he once held a rally where he told his supporters to raise their right hands and pledge their loyalty to him.

He also praised Putin and said he was a better leader than President Obama. He excused Putin’s murder of dissidents. He took Putin’s word over his own U.S. intelligence when the Russian dictator said he didn’t meddle in our election.

Trump praised Philippines president Rodrigo Duterte for being “tough on crime,” which often entailed dragging suspected drug dealers into the streets to be shot in the head. Duterte claims he has personally done this.

Trump praised Turkey’s Recep Erdogan after he basically made himself president for life and threw judges into prison. He also praised China’s Xi Jinping after he was made president for life and told him he was a “king.”

Trump tweeted Mussolini, praised Saddam for killing terrorists, and said Libya would be much better off if Gadhafi was still in charge. He said Egypt’s El-Sisi was his “favorite dictator.”

Don’t forget, Trump told Proud Boys, a white nationalist hate group, to “stand back and stand by,” on national television shortly before the election, and also said there were “fine people” on both sides in Charlottesville. Donald Trump believes “fine people” march with Nazis chanting, “Jews will not replace us.” Just in case you’re a Trump supporter, let me make two things clear to you: Trump lost the election and fine people don’t march with Nazis. I don’t care if you love Confederate statues, you don’t march with Nazis. The benefit could be a Toys for blind deaf kids with cleft palates, you still don’t march with Nazis. I don’t care if it’s free taco night with Nazis, you don’t eat tacos with Nazis.

Watch “How to become a Tyrant” and you’ll see it contains everything Donald Trump tried to implement. It’s full of tactics Donald Trump used and praised. Did Donald Trump praise Hitler? I believe it because it wouldn’t be the first time he praised a Nazi.

Why is it so hard to believe Donald Trump praised a Nazi when he is a Nazi?

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are SEVEN copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 9103, Fredericksburg, VA 22403.

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Smooth Transition


cjones11162020

Republicans are all for stuff like democracy and free elections, that is…as long as they get the results they want. It’s like being given freedom of speech as long as you say the right things.

Not liking the election results, Republicans, led by Donald Trump, are screaming that massive fraud occurred and that’s the only reason Donald Trump lost. Republicans are so afraid of straying from the ridiculous talking points and giving credibility that our democratic process works, that only four Republican senators have congratulated Joe Biden on winning the election. In contrast, Hillary Clinton congratulated Donald Trump on election night in 2016.

For months, Donald Trump said the only way he could lose the election was if there was massive voter fraud. Donald Trump knew Joe Biden could beat him so even before the election, he tried to discredit the election. He knew Joe Biden could defeat him, so he broke the law and violated his oath of office by asking a foreign nation to help him dig up dirt on Joe Biden. Donald Trump even withheld foreign military aid to that nation, while they were being attacked by Russia, until they delivered dirt on Biden. Donald Trump was impeached for breaking the law and trying to steal an election.

Republicans were fine with Donald Trump violating his oath of office and his attempt to steal an election so of course, they’re fine now with the lie that Democrats stole the election. How much more proof do you need that Republicans don’t care about the rule of law and democracy? How much more proof do you need that the GOP is nothing more than a sycophantic, Kool-Aid drinking cult?

Here’s one question: Who stole the election? Yeah, I get that it was Democrats, but which Democrats? Who was in charge? Who ran it? I mean, was it all one big cannibalistic pedophiliac deep state that stole the election from Donald Trump in Pennsylvania, Arizona, Michigan, Wisconsin, Nevada, and even in Republican-controlled Georgia, while not tampering with the part on those ballots that featured Republican senate candidates? How did Democrats lose an election while not winning the U.S. Senate and while losing House seats? How are ballots fake when they’re for Joe Biden but the same ballots not being fake when they’re for a Republican senate candidate? Are the ballots only half fake? How are the results fraudulent only in states Biden won, and by larger numbers than Trump beat Clinton with?

To be a MAGAt, you have to suspend reality.

Donald Trump has told over 22,000 lies, one of those being that there were millions of illegal voters in the 2016 election. He never proved that. So why is anyone buying into his election fraud bullshit now? Are we going to become the United States of Qanon? Will Republicans forever claim the 2020 election was stolen from them…like they’ll forever claim Pizzagate is real and Obama was born in Kenya?

Yesterday, the Department of Homeland Security issued a statement that the 2020 election was the “most secure in American history.” This is Donald Trump’s own DHS. That Democratic-run deep state runs deep.

One thing that’s kinda funny, well amusing to me, is that Donald Trump often talked about having a third presidential term…and voters didn’t want him to have a second.

Donald Trump has praised China’s leader for becoming that nations president for life. He’s made a few references about it in regards to himself which I’d be fine with if he was trying to president for life of China. Donald Trump loves his dictators. He’s rather spend a weekend exchanging love letters with Kim Jong Un, getting back scratches from Rodrigro Duterte, playing nine holes with Recip Erdogan, and kissing Vladimir Putin’s ass in Helsinki, than spend time with Democratically-elected leaders.

Another one of Donald Trump’s lies is that President Obama spied on his 2016 campaign, which he has called treason. He also says it should allow him that third term.

I’m not a constitutional law expert so that’s probably why I can’t find it anywhere in the United States Constitution where a president can get a third term in office if his predecessor spies on his presidential campaign. I also can’t find under which amendment that a president can ignore election results when he loses the election.

That’s what Republicans are doing. They’re ignoring an election. Secretary of State Mike Pompeo ever referred to the Constitution when talking about a “smooth transition” into a SECOND Trump administration.

Here’s the thing about that: The Constitution doesn’t spell out that we elect our president. Article II, Section 1, Clauses 2 and 3, state the president is choses by electors in each state. It’s practice they simply follow the election returns and never conduct substantive discussion or debate about who should be president. This may be what Pompeo is talking about…which means there has been substantive discussion on it between Republicans.

It’s a hail Mary attempt, but a lot of Republicans are envisioning stealing the election through the electors…if they can convince them to ignore election results.

It’s why they’re refusing to call Joe Biden “President-Elect Joe Biden” It’s why all departments have been told to budget for next year as though all those department heads will still be there in 2021, unless Trump has them fired for not being sufficiently sycophantic. It’s why the State Department won’t even pass on congrats to Biden from other nations. It’s why Republicans are saying Trump won 2020 in a massive landslide. It’s why the Trump administration isn’t allowing for a transfer of power. It’s why MAGAts like Mike Pompeo are talking about a “smooth transition” into a second Trump administration.

I can promise you this: If they have to steal it, it won’t be “smooth”

I thought it would be death for our democracy if Trump won the election. How could I have predicted the death of our democracy would come from his losing?

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Only Fascism


cjones08202020

Being a major campaign donor doesn’t make you qualified to be an ambassador to the European Union. It doesn’t make you qualified to be the ambassador to the United Kingdom. It doesn’t make you qualified to lead the Department of Education. And it doesn’t make you qualified to be in charge of the United States Post Office.

If Donald Trump, the worst president (sic) in the history of the United States, truly wanted to “make the Post Office great again,” he wouldn’t have appointed a fucknut with zero experience to lead it.

Donald Trump has been lying about the Post Office ever since he became president (sic). He’s made wild claims Amazon is overcharging the Post Office despite the fact the company’s business has been a boon for the nation’s mail service.

Louis DeJoy is the current Postmaster General. What experience does he have with Post Office? None, but he is a major Republican fundraiser. Also, he had stock in UPS and Amazon. He also currently holds somewhere between $30 to $75 million in stock in XPO, a subcontractor for the Post Office. Hello? Does nobody see the potential for corruption? DeJoy has been a true buzzkill and taken all the joy out of the Post Office. He immediately began to slow down delivery, banned overtime pay and extra delivery trips. He has de-joyed the Post Office.

DeJoy didn’t just stop there. He had more than 600 high-speed mail sorting machines were dismantled and removed from postal facilities without explanation. He removed mail collection boxes from the streets of many cities explaining they were going to areas with higher traffic (lies) but after being busted, said they’ll delay additional moves until after the election.

DeJoy continued sabotaging the mail. He reassigned or displaced 23 senior USPS officials, including the two top executives overseeing day-to-day operations. You know, got rid of the people who would see he was sabotaging the mail. DeJoy sent a letter to mail postal workers, that they’re probably still waiting for, where he admitted there are delays but they’re just “unintended consequences” that will eventually would improve service. This is where you raise one eyebrow in skepticism.

If DeJoy was a surgeon, he’d be telling his patients not to worry because the sponge he left inside them will eventually improve their system.

And in case you still don’t believe any of this is to sabotage mail-in voting and prevent millions of Americans from doing any voting, Donald Trump actually said he was blocking funds for the postal service in order to hinder mail-in voting. 

Donald Trump claims there’s fraud with mail-in voting, but he doesn’t have any proof. After being told there was no evidence of widespread voter fraud, Donald Trump’s stupid chief-of-staff said, “There’s no evidence that there’s not either. That’s the definition of fraud, Jake.”

Uh…no. That’s NOT the definition of fraud, Mark Meadows. And since there’s no evidence that there’s not evidence no, not, huh? What? OK. There’s no evidence that there’s not widespread voter fraud….shit. Idiots. You know what, there’s no evidence that monkeys haven’t flown out of Mark Meadows’ butt, but there’s not any evidence that they haven’t either. For that matter, since there’s no evidence of a Donald Trump Russian hooker pee tape, there’s not any evidence that there’s Not a Donald Trump Russian hooker pee tape. 

Here’s the thing, kids; Donald Trump is trying to steal an election. He claims there’s fraud in mailing your ballot, yet he’s voting…wait for it…by mail. He’s arguing if there’s a fair election, then it’s not fair. This is what fascists do.

In Russia, Vladimir Putin stops fair elections by throwing his opponents in prison. The people who report he’s throwing his opponents into prisons get thrown off buildings.

In 2002, Saddam Hussein held a referendum on whether he should serve another seven years as president. He won with 100% of the vote. Every voter, of which there were over 11 million, voted yes. Yet, despite his 100% approval rating, when he was hiding in a hole from American forces, one of his constituents pointed at that hole and said, “There he is.”

In Venezuela, Nicola Madura was reelected to a second six-year term in 2018 in an election that only nations like China, Cuba, Russia, Egypt, Syria, and Turkey recognize as fair. That’s like your dog recommending you eating out of the litter box. He likes it. The National Assembly has declared Juan Guaido as acting president, and Maduro’s strongmen have banned him from leaving the country.

Sviatlana Heorhiyeuna Pilipchuk is the opposition candidate in Belarus who decided to run for president after the previous opposition candidate, her husband, was arrested for being the opposition candidate. She won the election with 80% of the vote, yet the dictator, Alexander Lukashenko, declared he won with the same result. Currently, Pilipchuk is in exile in Lithuania.

Donald Trump loves fascists. He’s trying to become one. He sent armed goons to teargas peaceful protesters to remove them from in front of the White House so he could go outside for a photo-op. He’s sent unidentified armed goons to attack peaceful demonstrators in Portland, to teargas them, crack them in the skulls with batons, and to throw them into unmarked vans for interrogation. Now he’s trying to stop an election. He’s even threatened to delay the election. By “delay,” he means never.

And, if Donald Trump succeeds in remaining in the White House, through election or force, it will get worse. I believe it will destroy our nation. It will destroy the Constitution and our democracy. It may rise to the level that if we still have three branches of government, the other two branches will be mere puppets. 

If we don’t have a fair election in 2020, we may never have another one again.

America liberates nations. Right now, America needs to liberate America. We have a fascist and this is where the fascist system begins. 

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Mooslem Patrol


cjones12092015

I think I ranted enough yesterday on this topic that I can spare you a political rant today.

While writing yesterday’s column I inserted a part about getting a tan. Then I thought, hey that’s my next cartoon. So I took it out and saved it for this. I went to bed and then I got back up because I wanted to rough it out at least. I had a fear I’d forget the idea even though I don’t forget ideas I like.

I sat on it all day because there’s only one cartoonist out there I think is crazy and weird enough to think like me. I wanted to see if he came up with the same idea. Yeah, I could have drawn it and beaten him to the punch but even if I’m first with the idea, I don’t want to publish the same idea. Thankfully he wasn’t as weird as me on Tuesday.

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