Ellen DeGeneres

Friends In MAGA Places


Talk show host Ellen DeGeneres is catching a lot of heat for being chummy and laughing it up with whom many consider the perpetrator of massive atrocities on a worldwide level that will take decades to recover from. No, not the Jonas Brothers. I’m talking about President George W. Bush.

After a photo emerged of Ellen sitting next to Bush at the Dallas Cowboys’ game with the Green Bay Packers last Sunday, people went on Twitter to criticize her choice of friends. Ellen dedicated her opening monologue on her Tuesday show to address the backlash.

She said, “I’m friends with George Bush. In fact, I’m friends with a lot of people who don’t share the same beliefs that I have.” She added, “Just because I don’t agree with someone on everything doesn’t mean I’m not going to be friends with them.” She then made a plea to be kind to everyone.

Reese Witherspoon and Kristen Bell both tweeted out support, though Witherspoon later deleted hers. Maybe she was afraid of offending China. I don’t know. But other celebrities went after her. Mark Ruffalo tweeted, “Sorry, until George W. Bush is brought to justice for the crimes of the Iraq War, (including American-lead torture, Iraqi deaths & displacement, and the deep scars-emotional & otherwise-inflicted on our military that served his folly), we can’t even begin to talk about kindness.” Don’t make Ruffalo angry. You won’t like him when he’s angry.

Personally, I don’t have an issue with who Ellen is friends with and I respect she didn’t back down. I don’t care who anyone is friends with. There are times I’m disappointed in people when I learn they’re friends with a shit-eating troglodyte, but I think to myself, “that’s too bad,” and I move on. The reason I don’t care who you’re friends with is that I don’t want you to give me crap about who I’m friends with…or who I refuse to be friends with.

With that, I say to Ellen, don’t you lecture me about who to be friends with and treat kindly.

I have friends I don’t agree with politically. I have friends who vote Republican, watch Fox News, put toilet paper under instead of over, put ketchup on hotdogs, and even cheer for the Dallas Cowboys. I have friends who are gun nuts. During the buildup to the Iraq War, I was friends with many people who supported the invasion…until they started lying about it (like blaming Iraq for 9/11). After the war, I had some difficulty with those same people when they decided to change the reasoning for the invasion after their first one proved to be total and complete bullshit.

I accept I’m a hard person to talk politics with if we disagree. I will hammer a point. But, if you’re a Trump supporter, you will have a hard time talking politics with me because I use facts and I’ll call you on your deflections. I don’t let you get away with it.

I’m not really friends with any Trump supporters. Sure, there are people on Facebook but they’re not real-life friends. The reason I’m not friends with Trump supporters is because I’m not in the habit of making friends with assholes.

A few years ago, I started freelancing for a publication on local issues. Then, I discovered the people running the outlet weren’t just Trump supporters, but HUGE Trump supporters. The editor even argued to me that Trump should be elected because after working hard to become a billionaire, he frankly deserves to get whatever he wants. Seriously. I didn’t pull out of the relationship because I had already made a commitment and I wasn’t going to draw cartoons supporting Trump or even talk to them that much about U.S. politics. A short time later, I read an article that argued one shouldn’t enter any business deals with Trump supporters because they lack ethics and morals and eventually, they’ll screw you over. I kept that in mind as my deal with this Trump-loving outlet plodded along. Everything was fine for a while but eventually, they screwed me over. Today, they owe me for five and a half months of work. I stopped working for them last April and they still haven’t paid one cent. Surprise! And guess what. Not having any ethics doesn’t appear to bother them.

If you’re a Trump supporter, being in business or friendship with you doesn’t work for me because I don’t trust you. You’ve proven everything you championed in the past, ethics, law-and-order, religion, patriotism, family values, fiscal responsibility, were all lies. That’s it for me right there. If you’re a Trump supporter, you’re a liar. I base this on the fact that I have never heard anyone argue for or defend Donald Trump without lying. Also, you’re supporting a liar, so what does that make you?

They say you can agree to disagree. With Trump supporters, I’ll only go so far to agree that I’m right and you’re wrong. They say we should respect everyone’s opinion, but I don’t respect your opinion when it’s based on hate and lies.

The other thing is, you’re in a cult. I don’t have a lot friends in cults. You sold out your dignity, principles, and your nation to a really imbecilic cult leader. I don’t like you. You’re destroying my nation. So, no. We’re not going to be friends. On top of all those reasons, you’re probably an idiot.

Sure, I’ll agree to disagree and respect where you’re coming from when we argue about supply-side economics. But I don’t respect a damn thing about you or your opinion when you want to “build the wall” or “send them back.”

So, Ellen, with all due respect, don’t lecture me about who I need to be friends with or that I should be kind to assholes. And if everyone else in this country joins the Trump cult, I’ll get a dog.

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