Cognitive Test

Person Woman Man Camera TV


cjones07272020

While talking to Mary Trump, Donald Trump’s niece who just published a book on how stupid, racist, sexist, and creepy her uncle is, Stephen Colbert said, “Bragging about passing a cognitive test is one of the ways you fail a cognitive test.”

Donald Trump was mocked for bragging about passing a cognitive test, a test not designed to detect intelligence but for early signs of dementia. Then, he bragged about it on television again which brought new mockery. He’s not dumb enough to go on TV and do it a third time, is he? Yes. Yes, he is.

Yesterday, an interview was released where he said he boasted how amazing it was that he could perform a memory sequence. Telling Dr. Marc K. Siegel, a professor of medicine at New York University and an analyst for Fox News, he was able to repeat, “Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.”

Trump elaborated. “It’s, like, you’ll go: Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV. So they say, ‘Could you repeat that?’ So I said, ‘Yeah. It’s: Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.'”

“‘OK, that’s very good. If you get it in order you get extra points,'”. OK, now he’s asking you other questions, other questions, and then, 10 minutes, 15, 20 minutes later they say, ‘Remember that first question…not the first…but the 10th question? Give us that again. Can you do that again?'”

“And you go: ‘Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV,'”  If you get it in order, you get extra points.”

“They said nobody gets it in order. It’s actually not that easy, but for me, it was easy. And that’s not an easy question. In other words, they ask it to you, they give you five names and you have to repeat ’em. And that’s OK. If you repeat ’em out of order, it’s OK, but, you know, it’s not as good. But when you go back about 20, 25 minutes later and they say go back to that…they don’t tell you this …”Go back to that question and repeat ’em, can you do it?’ And you go: ‘Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.'”

“They say, ‘That’s amazing. How did you do that?'” I do it because I have, like, a good memory, because I’m cognitively there. Now, Joe should take that test, because something’s going on. And, and, I say this with respect. I mean…going to probably happen to all of us, right? You know? It’s going to happen.”

I think it’s already happened.

The thing is, Donald Trump exhibited to the interviewer, a doctor, that he could repeat it several times immediately, not 25 minutes later. By the way, it’s supposed to be a ten-minute test. The interviewer did NOT ask any follow-up questions. What he should have done was ask Donald Trump to repeat five other words, like, “Plane, Toy, Fox, Clock, Hat.” Then, ask him to repeat them again. And later, like 25 minutes later near the end of the interview, ask Donald Trump to do it again. Then…maybe we could all say, “That’s amazing.”

What’s amazing is that Donald Trump won’t shut up about being able to repeat five words in order again and again. These were five words of things that were probably in his immediate area during the interview. There was a person, a woman (surely Kaleigh McEnany was off-camera), a man, a camera, and probably a television monitor, and these words were all similar (“Person, Woman, Man” and “Camera, TV”). And even while repeating these words, Trump had some difficulty. It wasn’t “bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.” It was more like, “Bam, bam……….bam? Bam….Bam.” That’s amazing.

In an earlier interview, he claimed it was in front of several doctors who all said, “Rarely does anybody do what you just did.” Did what? He’s bragged about passing a cognitive test more than he’s bragged bout winning Michigan.

Joe Biden said Donald Trump is our first racist president (sic). That’s not true but rarely does a president exhibit as much racism as Donald Trump. Racism is what Donald Trump keeps repeating. We know this: Donald Trump is a stupid racist displaying early signs of dementia.

Rarely does a president brag about passing a cognitive test. This is a man who was applauded for lifting a cup with one hand. That’s amazing.

We have a stupid, racist, sexist, narcissistic moron as president (sic) of the United States of America. That’s amazing.

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Stable Cognitive Genius


cjones07242020

I read a column yesterday by someone working for a media company who elected to take a cognitive test. In writing about it, his two concerns were his employer might freak out and he may have scored lower than Donald Trump had on his cognitive test.

The writer was concerned his concentration and focus had decreased and at times while speaking, he’d say a word in place of a word he really meant, like “guitar” for “cartoon.” I’m using those two examples because I’ve done that. To pass a cognitive test, you need to score a 26 to be considered “normal” with the highest score being 30. He was concerned because he messed up two questions and Trump claims he had a perfect score. Who wants to be less cognitive than Trump? If that’s the case, you may want to seek serious medical attention.

Of course, we’re talking about what Trump claims. Trump claims he had a perfect score on a test performed in front of several doctors, many who said, “We’ve never seen anybody do what you just did.” I’m thinking he crapped himself while taking the test because I’m sure those doctors have seen people answer every question successfully. It’s an easy test, or at least it’s supposed to be.

The thing is, the test isn’t meant to be difficult. It’s designed to see if you’re “cognitive,” as in, not showing signs of dementia or other mental impairments. The most difficult part of the test is counting down from 100 by sevens, spelling the word “world” backward, and remembering a series of four simple words minutes later. I went over the test myself and the only thing I saw that would challenge is that counting backward thing. Cartoonists don’t do math, at least this one doesn’t. But even then, math would be substituted with spelling a word backward hcihw I nac od.

The other thing about the test is, it’s not meant to prove you’re smart or dumb. Stating the time, date, and the city you’re in doesn’t prove either. A lot of dumb people know where they are. Drawing a clock at ten past eleven doesn’t prove you’re smart because it doesn’t take a genius to draw a circle, count to 12, and know the differences between the big hand and the little hand. Bragging about passing one of these tests is like celebrating you won a game of checkers you played against yourself. If you fail the test, it’s less of a “ha-ha” and more of an “uh-oh.”

And still, Donald Trump said it was hard. Those last five questions, ooh, what a doozy. Donald Trump admitted to Chris Wallace he has a mental impairment. He’s not just a stupid asshole. He has a serious mental defect…in addition to being a stupid asshole.

Donald Trump is boasting about taking the cognitive test as a way of attacking Joe Biden’s mental status. But by boasting you took a test that’s only suggested when there are fears you’re losing your mind, he’s telling us there’s a lot of people around him worried he’s losing his mind. Donald Trump claims he “aced” a test where nobody calls you “Ace” if you ace it. He said Joe Biden “couldn’t answer those questions.” You know, questions like identifying a picture of a camel.

Donald Trump told Fox News’ Chris Wallace during an interview, “Let’s take a test right now. Let’s go down, Joe and I will take a test. Let him take the same test that I took.” Keep in mind, we have not seen the results of Donald Trump’s test. I’m sure if Donald Trump wasn’t stupid enough to tell us he took the test, that we never would have found out.

Wallace said to Trump, “Well it’s not the hardest test. There’s a picture and it says, ‘What’s that?’ And it’s an elephant.” That irritated Trump because he did find it hard to spot that elephant. Trump said to Wallace, “That’s all misrepresentation,” and “I’ll bet you couldn’t even answer the last five questions,” even though Wallace had just told him he had taken the test and it wasn’t hard. I’m guessing Wallace answered those last five questions.

What we need to know is…why? Why did Donald Trump take this test? Who suggested it? Did many people suggest it? What action or statement inspired someone in his orbit to say, “Hey, take this test for dementia.”? How many doctors were in that room? And, can we see the test?

Again, the test is not supposed to be hard…for people who are not suffering any mental impairment. If Donald Trump found the one-page ten-minute test difficult, he’s suffering from mental impairments, and while the test doesn’t prove smarts or dumbness…Donald Trump is dumb enough to announce to the world he’s suffering from dementia.

It has nothing to do with whether he’s suffering from dementia or another ailment that affects how intelligent he is. Donald Trump is a fucking moron. He’s also racist, narcissistic, mean, and a conman lacking empathy. He has the worst personality traits anyone could have on top of having dementia.

Joe Biden does not have a mental impairment. Joe Biden stutters. If you think stuttering is a sign of dementia or has anything to do with how smart a person is, that’s your ignorance and shame on you for thinking it is. Stuttering is a speech disorder that does not indicate any cognitive dysfunction. Boasting you took a cognitive test and “aced” it is an indication of cognitive dysfunction.

And voting for Donald Trump, putting the nuclear codes in his tiny hands, and leaving the security of this nation to a racist, narcissistic, reality TV host who’s a fucking moron with dementia is another sign of a cognitive dysfunction.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Cognitive Trump


cjones07162020

When Donald Trump revealed he took a cognitive test, his manner of describing it made you think he needs to take a cognitive test.

Donald Trump told Sean Hannity, “I actually took one when I — very recently, when I — when I was (this is where he seems to stop himself before revealing why he was rushed on a sudden unscheduled trip to the Walter Reed hospital last November) — the radical left were saying, is he all there? Is he all there? And I proved I was all there, because I got — I aced it. I aced the test.”

Then he said Joe Biden should take the same test while also boasting about how good he was at “acing” the test. He said, “He should take the same exact test, a very standard test. I took it at Walter Reed Medical Center in front of doctors, And they were very surprised. They said, that’s an unbelievable thing. Rarely does anybody do what you just did. But he should take that same test.”

Rarely does anybody reveal the shit they’re saying freaked people out enough to the point they had him take a cognitive test.

Here’s the thing folks, nobody takes a cognitive test as a leisurely activity. I mean, you could probably find some site on the internet and take one for shits and giggles like you can with a citizenship test. But when most people take a cognitive test, it’s because there are concerns you should take a cognitive test. It’s because you appear non-cognitive like you went into a closet and pooped in all the shoes.

For example, nobody ever brought up the subject of a cognitive test during the Obama administration. President Barack Obama never boasted about passing a cognitive test.

And maybe you do pass the cognitive test. If you are able to successfully identify a photo of a camel, state the date and time, can draw a clock with the time 10 past 11, and can count down from 100 by sevens, they should probably let you continue to drive a car, but because there was so much concern over your cognitive abilities, you probably should not have access to the nuclear codes.

And maybe this cognitive thing with Trump proves he’s not racist and he honestly couldn’t get past his own name being shouted in a video to realize fuckers in it were also shouting “white power” before he retweeted it.

But how bad is the new normal where the president (sic) is bragging about passing a cognitive test and boast that he was being praised for it like he’s a toddler? What’s next? Is he going to brag about having the cognitive ability to wipe his own butt? That’s plausible because recently, he displayed he still has the ability to lift a glass with one hand and his audience cheered him for it. What a big boy you are. What a low bar we’ve set.

And what’s the deal with bragging about taking a cognitive test, demanding your political opponent take one as well, then not releasing the results of your cognitive test? It’s like that time he screamed about President Obama’s school records being sealed while not releasing his own school records. This fucker won’t even release his SAT score and he hired a nerd to take that for him. What’s next? Is he going to demand Joe Biden to release his tax returns (he actually already has)? It’s not like Joe Biden is fighting in the Supreme Court to keep his taxes concealed.

Finally, the other thing is, if Donald Trump says he passed a cognitive test, that means he failed it. The man is a liar and basically, everything he says turns out to be untrue and he turns to be everything he accuses others of being. Donald Trump is a fucking moron.

Passing a cognitive test? What Donald Trump doesn’t get is that he shouldn’t have had to take one. When is he going to brag about passing an STD test after cheating on his wife? And what flavor lollipop did the doctor give him after passing the test?

Let me remind you why there is a Trump baby balloon. Because Donald Trump is a huge, gassy baby.

The truth of the matter is, we should be freaking terrified and scared shitless to the point we don’t sleep because this idiot who suggested drinking bleach to kill a virus is the president (sic) of the United States…and he has the nuclear codes!

If you’re not, you should probably take a cognitive test.

Tip Jar: This pandemic is hitting everyone, including your favorite goofy cartoonist. I have lost clients and I’m afraid I might lose more. The PayPal button has always been included here for those who can and want to voluntarily support what I do. I understand this time is hard on everyone. If you can’t, don’t contribute. Take care of yourself and your family first.

But, all and any help is greatly appreciated and it helps keep me going. Think of me like a street performer busking out tunes on a corner (I won’t play “Wonderwall.” I promise). If you like the tune, or in this case, toon, throw a buck into the tip jar. It’ll help me play another song, draw another toon, write another blog, make another video, and post another snarky post on social media. It’ll help keep me alive. You can also order a signed print for $40. And if you don’t like the PayPal option, you can snail mail it to my P.O. Box. 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.