Chuck Schumer

Shake It For Trump


cjones05262019

Donald Trump is the boy who cried, “Infrastructure Week” as in, he never had any intention of working on infrastructure with Speaker Nancy Pelosi or Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer.

The Democrats went to the White House to work with Trump on infrastructure, something he claims he’d be very good at because he lives in a structure, but instead, he used it as a ploy to explode over Congressional investigations.

Trump is refusing to work with Democrats on infrastructure or any bipartisan measures until they “get these phony investigations over with,” as he said in a Rose Garden tempter tantrum complete with pre-planned props.

Trump claims he was planning on a legitimate meeting with his Democratic colleagues until Pelosi accused him of engaging in a cover-up. He then said he “doesn’t do coverups,” as he has refused to release his taxes and continues to fight subpoenas and order underlings not to testify before Congress. Don’t get me started on that dead ferret on his head.

Donald Trump does not do infrastructure. Donald Trump does coverups.

Do you remember when Obama held the nation hostage and refused to do his job when Republicans conducted one investigation after another on Benghazi? How about when Bill Clinton was investigated repeatedly from the day he walked into the Oval Office? Donald Trump doesn’t multitask. Trump can’t even walk and chew gum at the same time.

The president is supposed to do his job, not hold the nation hostage because he’s butthurt. If you don’t want to be investigated, then don’t be a crook. Trump is upset because the Justice Department reached a deal with Congress to provide some secret material related to the Mueller Report, and a second federal judge ruled against Trump’s efforts to block Congress from gaining access to his financial information.

In Britain, protesters have decided to throw milkshakes at conservative lawmakers. It’s gotten so bad, the police have asked some McDonalds to stop selling them when conservative assholes are nearby.

If you don’t want to be investigated or covered in delicious milkshakes, don’t be a conservative asshole.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch Me Draw.

Putin Talking Points


cjones01092019

Did you know the reason the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan in 1979 was because of terrorism? Did you know the Soviet Union had the right to invade them? Did you know it led to the Soviet Union being called “Russia” today? Yeah, me neither.

First, a quick little history lesson.

Afghanistan was a puppet government of the Soviet Union. When an insurgency popped up, initially backed by Pakistan and Iran, the Soviet Union invaded to protect their puppet state. Their justification was the Brezhnev Doctrine, which was a policy they used to justify their “right” to intervene in the affairs of communist countries. This was a big deal during the Cold War and the Soviets had argued this policy when intervening in uprisings in Hungary and Czechoslovakia, retroactively. Russians are real big about revisionism, which we’ll get to in a minute.

Leonid Brezhnev was the head of the Soviet Union and he sent Soviet forces into his southern neighbor where they fought for ten years trying to protect communism. By the end of the war, the Soviets lost nearly 15,000 soldiers and their Afghan allies lost around 18,000. It’s estimated they had killed between 75,000 to 90,000 of the Mujahideen, the forces trying to restore Afghanistan back to an Islamist state.

Between 562,000 to two million civilians were killed with around three million wounded. There were about five million refugees and two million displaced.

The United States, along with the United Kingdom, Saudi Arabia, West Germany, Pakistan, and China, were aiding the Mujahideen (which included the likes of Osama bin Laden). Go rent Charlie Wilson’s War.

President Jimmy Carter’s administration opposed the Soviet invasion and even boycotted participating in the Moscow Olympics over it. President Ronald Reagan continued Carter’s policy of support against the Soviet Union. These were two presidents, Democratic and Republican who knew that the Russians were not our friend.

Earlier this week while engaging in an incoherent rant at a cabinet meeting, Donald Trump, the current president of the United States, said, “The reason Russia was in Afghanistan was because terrorists were going into Russia. They were right to be there. The problem is, it was a tough fight. And literally, they went bankrupt; they went into being called Russia again, as opposed to the Soviet Union. You know, a lot of these places you’re reading about now are no longer part of Russia because of Afghanistan.”

His rambling kinda reminded me of my college history professor, who was also insane. He once went on a rant about how great Montreal was until draft dodging American hippies went up there and pooped on the sidewalks. The subject we were on was not Vietnam or Canadian history. Fortunately, it wasn’t on the test.

I don’t know if my college professor was accurate at any part of his rant, or if he was off his meds like our president, but everything Donald Trump said was bullshit.

The war was not about terrorism, they did not have the right to be there, and Afghanistan is just one of many factors leading to the collapse of the Soviet Union. But where did Donald Trump get this idea about the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan? I was a kid and I remember all of this, so surely an old orange racist fart like Donald Trump would remember it. Right? Since there has never been any sort of revisionist campaign in this nation about the Soviet’s invasion, how could Trump come up with such a cockamamie description? Putin.

Russian President Vladimir Putin, who has much control over Trump, has initiated a propaganda campaign describing the war exactly as Donald Trump did. So, did Trump get this description from his master? Probably, but when? Did Putin feed it into his head during their private off-the-record chat in Helsinki? Probably.

Once again, Trump is doing Putin’s bidding. He’s advocating for Russian propaganda and even that nation’s pride. He’s arguing they had the right to invade their neighbor, undermining American policy and patriotism of Presidents Carter and Reagan.

The Wall Street Journal’s editorial page, a friend to Trump’s policies and owned by Rupert Murdoch, called Trump’s history lesson “reprehensible.”

They wrote, “We cannot recall a more absurd misstatement of history by an American President.”

I can’t recall a more absurd human to occupy the office of the American presidency. I also can’t recall one more stupid, racist, traitorous, despicable, stupid, sexists, and appeasing to Russia.

Did I mention “stupid” more than once? I’m fine with that.

Trump is Putin’s puppet, and he appeases him again and again. He’s defended Russia’s attack on our democracy and now he’s advocating for Putin’s propaganda. I think Trump’s comments is further justification for his impeachment. I hope Mueller is taking notes.

Trump and Putin are trying to rewrite history. I assure you, history won’t be kind to them. Instead of rewriting history, I’d rather see Trump become history.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Nancy Boy


cjones12182018

Just another silly little bonus cartoon for you. Enjoy.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

Nancy’s Wall


cjones12172018

Donald Trump, the great negotiator, negotiated himself into a box yesterday.

Trump told Senator Chuck Schumer that if he doesn’t get what he wants for funding a border wall with Mexico, that he would shut the government down and take all the blame for it. He said, on camera, that he wouldn’t blame Schumer or the Democrats, and he’d take all the blame. He also said he would be “proud” to shut the government down for border security.

The nation doesn’t like government shutdowns, especially around Christmas. In the past, both parties blamed each other for shutdowns even though nobody wins them except Bill Clinton. Now, Democrats can refuse to fund the wall, let Trump shut down the government, and watch public scorn land on him. Trump gave Democrats little reason to give him funding for the wall.

Publicly, Republicans responded by saying they didn’t want a shutdown, and they hoped the negotiations would continue. Majority Leader Mitch McConnell described the discussions in the Oval Office between Trump, Schumer, and Pelosi as “spirited.” If Republicans are saying that in public then they’re probably screaming behind closed doors.

One administration official, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said Trump appeared upset after leaving the meeting, flicking a folder and sending papers flying out. A staffer told the Los Angeles Times after Schumer and Pelosi left, the West Wing sprang into “damage-control mode,” adding, “The aftermath of that meeting was not pretty.”

And you wonder why no reasonable person wants to be his Chief of Staff.

Trump invited the Democrats into a trap. The setting was before cameras where Trump feels he has the edge. The Democrats even offered to take the discussion private to avoid the theatrics, but Trump refused, citing “transparency.” Unfortunately, if your trap hinges on your being more intelligent and more prepared than your opponents, and you’re neither, you’re going to fall into your own trap.

Reality TV is not reality. Reality is what Chuck and Nancy delivered each time Trump lied. He lied about having Republican support in the House for the wall (which they haven’t voted to fund over the past two years). Trump lied eight times that construction on the wall has started. He claimed Mexico would pay for the wall by paying higher prices for American goods in the “New Nafta.” The Democrats called him out on his lies. The reality is that Trump is not going to get funding for his stupid wall.

Trump is not used to being corrected or stood up to. In classic bully fashion, when confronted, he backed down.

Trump attempted some mansplaining and got schooled. He said Pelosi was “in a situation where it’s not easy for her to talk right now,” because of her race for Speaker. Pelosi calmly hit back, with, “Mr. President, please don’t characterize the strength that I bring to this meeting as the leader of the House Democrats, who just won a big victory.”

Later, she got her digs in. She said, “You get into a tinkle contest with a skunk, you get tinkle all over you.” But the statement that will truly sting Trump the most was, “It’s like a manhood thing for him. As if manhood could ever be associated with him.” Pelosi “smocked” Trump. The only thing that would have made it better would have been one of the Democrats referring to Trump as “Individual One.”

Any doubt that still existed before this that Pelosi is the one to take on Trump is now extinguished. Jules and Vincent couldn’t have walked out of the cafe any cooler at the end of Pulp Fiction than Pelosi walked out of the White House yesterday.

Democrats have put two offers on the table, neither of which has wall funding: $1.6 billion in “fencing” along the southern border or a continuation of last year’s spending levels for the Department of Homeland Security, about $1.3 billion. Trump is demanding $5 billion.

For Trump sycophants, they see Trump defending their interest by demanding that they pay for a campaign promise he broke. On the campaign trail, Trump promised Mexico would pay for the wall. At no point during the 2016 presidential campaign did Trump say American taxpayers would have to pay for his stupid, useless, racist border wall. Now, he’s telling his supporters they should be upset that Democrats won’t make them pay for it.

Democrats should not give Trump one cent for his wall. They also should not use Dreamers as a bargaining chip like they did earlier in the year. Don’t make Americans pay for Trump’s broken campaign promise, especially on something useless that’s only designed to appeal to a xenophobic, nationalistic, racist base.

And welcome to the new reality where Trump is not in control, and he might actually realize it. Trump is not a negotiator, intelligent, or even remotely competent for the presidency. Hopefully, Republicans start to realize it too.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch me draw.

A Senate Upchuck


cjones01242018

Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer looked Mitch McConnell in the eye, and he blinked. Despite having public support behind him, agreeing with his stance on DACA and blaming the GOP for the shutdown, Schumer caved.

Did Trump, the master of the Art of the Deal, out negotiate Schumer? No. Though the White House will claim victory and give credit to Trump, he sat on the sidelines. His only contribution was submitting confusion, releasing a commercial blaming Democrats for murders committed by illegal immigrants, and creating an outgoing voicemail from the White House insulting Democrats. But, for the most part, the GOP put Grandpa Trump in a corner. Trump had as much input into these negotiations as he did formulating the Eagle’s offensive game plan against the Vikings.

The reason the GOP won this showdown is that Chuck trusts Mitch. Schumer believes McConnell’s promise that he’ll bring a vote on DACA by February 17. This rosy scenario leaves Dreamers with many options, like, do I allow myself to be deported to a strange nation or do I find a place to hide from ICE agents?

This is the same Mitch McConnell who refused to bring a vote or a hearing on Supreme Court nominee Merrick Garland. This is the same Mitch McConnell who promised Senator Susan Collins that Republicans would extend the Obamacare subsidies in exchange for her vote on the tax cut. This is the same Mitch McConnell who got Senator Jeff Flake’s vote on the tax cut bill in exchange for action on DACA, which is where we are today.

The Republicans claim they’re not holding Dreamers hostage, yet they held back on funding CHIP (Children’s health insurance) until they could use it as a pawn in this budget battle.

Schumer made a deal with a slimy turtle man without securing any guarantees from the House of Representatives, which is inhabited by immigrant-hating xenophobic white nationalists. Within hours of ending the shutdown, McConnell was referring to the Dreamers as “illegals.” Senators John Kennedy of Louisiana said the only way they’ll get a vote on DACA is if it’s tied to other immigration issues, like chain migration, the immigration lottery system, more security for our border, including funding for Trump’s border wall.

These people have betrayed their base with the lie that Mexico will pay for the wall. What makes Schumer think they’ll keep a promise to him?

And of course, you can’t trust Donald Trump. This guy made promises during negotiations only to back out of them later.

It seemed Trump adviser Stephen Miller was the only survivor from Trump’s creepy coalition of white nationalist xenophobes after the departures of Steve Bannon (for pissing everybody off) and Sebastian Gorka (who never got a security clearance and is a fugitive wanted in Hungary). Now it seems Miller has company as Chief of Staff John Kelly has turned out to be an immigrant hater. These two guys are formulating Trump’s America First policy, and they’re not open-minded toward allowing the 800,000 DACA recipients to stay in this nation.

There will be another budget showdown in two weeks. Kennedy has stated it will have to be resolved before they even talk about DACA. That means they will continue to hold it hostage, and if there is a vote, it won’t be a clean bill. Other immigration issues will have to be tied into it. Why? Because these guys are lying bastards.

Elected Republicans profess concern for DACA. Trump said he wants a “bill of love” to settle the situation. This is the same guy who has put the gun to the Dreamers’ foreheads. If you scroll through social media and read feeds from conservative voters, you’ll see that they refer to Dreamers as “illegals” (they’re not), and they would prefer they’re all kicked out of the nation. And, when they do vote on DACA, most of these Republicans are going to vote no.

Chuck Schumer has good intentions, but he’s a fool to trust Republicans. We already know Trump is a liar and a conman. McConnell will make promises he never intends to keep. Paul Ryan, who has to placate the most extreme of the far right in his caucus, isn’t even in on this deal. At the top of all this is the White House. Schumer may have put the future of Dreamers in the hands of Stephen Baby Goebbels Miller.

Leaving Dreamers with Stephen Miller is a dumber idea than hiring Michael Myers as your babysitter on Halloween. It’s not going to end well.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print (please specify which print you want or I won’t mail one). All donations will receive my eternal gratitude

Kickin’ It With Chuck And Nancy


cjones09112017

To help set the proper mood, THIS is the music for the first panel, and THIS is the music for the second.

An expression I’m sick and tired of is “nothing burger.” It’s popular with conservatives, who also love “fake news.” Both terms are often used together, as in “this Russian collusion story is a nothing burger and fake news.” Leave it to Republicans to muck up their metaphors since neither can actually exist. Technically, if it’s fake then it’s not news, and if there’s nothing on that burger then how can it be a burger? You can’t give me two slices of bread and tell me that’s a sandwich.

When someone describes something as a “nothing burger,” that just means there’s a lot of shit on that burger. Or, when they say “fake news,” you might wanna check to make sure we’re not at Defcon Five. It’s kinda like when George W. Bush said the Keystone Pipeline was a “no brainer,” when it was actually something that you might want to apply some brains to….or Donald Trump’s use of “believe me” is his way of saying “I’m lying my ass off and I should probably go to prison for this shit.”

The great deal maker that is Donald Trump totally caved into Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi. He did it on his own turf, the Oval Office, and in front of Majority Leaders Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell. I think Anthony Scaramucci must have left his “front-stabbing” knife in the White House because Trump took it and cut Ryan and McConnell’s guts out.

But you know, maybe if you had to choose between making a deal with Democrats or guys who look like Eddie Munster and a turtle, you’d deal with the Democrats too.

Trump’s deal with Chuck and Nancy was to kick the can of the debt ceiling down the road for three months which will keep the government running and to provide disaster relief for the hurricanes. While Republicans are howling in protest, it might be the first smart thing Trump has done and is in the best interest of the country.

Why? For starters, Democrats round up their votes. Republicans are herding cats. Really stupid cats. The other reason it was a smart deal is that over 100 Republicans voted against disaster relief…including several from Texas and Florida. I told you them cats be stupid. They also have back-stabbing knives they use on their constituents.

Republicans are surprised that Trump sold them out. It’s kinda like being surprised that Donald Trump is a Nazi-hugging bigot after he just spent the last two years attacking Mexicans, Muslims, women, transgenders, etc.

The guy who had to eat the most poo was Paul Ryan. Mitch McConnell has been eating it for a while. But, Ryan really had to master some spin on this deal. Before the deal was made Ryan described the Democrats’ proposal as “ridiculous.” The day after he was spinning it as Trump wanting a “bipartisan response and not a food fight on the timing of the debt limit.” Paul, there is a food fight but it’s not food your party is throwing.

Paul Ryan had a reputation for being intelligent, and he was known as a policy wonk. Now he’s coming off like that kid you knew in high school who required seven attempts to get his learners permit. Ryan’s driving into trees and snow banks.

Every Republican exposed their backside to Trump’s treachery when they got in bed with him, and they’re all dumbasses, but Ryan was supposed to be the smart one. Since Ryan can’t legislate or lead his party then he’s no different or better than say, a Mitch McConnell. Mitch can’t accomplish shit either. How’s that Obamacare repeal working out? Are you tired of winning yet?

Trump wanted to win, and to win he had to play with Democrats. Maybe he is learning on the job. Making deals with the opposition party worked for Reagan, Clinton, Bush I, and Bush II. The Republicans problem is that they’re just not as smart as the Democrats…and that’s not exactly a high bar for comparison.

Now if only Republicans could be as upset about Trump’s collusion with Putin as they are for his dancing with Chuck and Nancy.

Creative notes: I had to Google some weird stuff for this cartoon. I’m not alone in this house and I had my door open so cats could run in and out and not sit outside my shut door meowing to come in. So, I was afraid someone would walk by or visit just as I was looking up outfits for Vladimir and Trump. There are two ladies in this house and I’m not sure they’d buy the “researching for work” excuse.

Another concern was “boogers” and “cat poop.” I know some editors are skittish and that could kill this cartoon, but then I realized, if they get past the feather duster then I probably don’t have to worry about the boogers or cat poop.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Trainwreck


cjones08092015

New York Senator Chuck Schumer is going to vote against Obama’s deal with Iran. That’s a blow for Obama as Schumer is highly respected, may be the next Majority Leader, and is the highest ranking Jew in the Senate. It also hurts that he’s a Democrat. Ouch, Obama.

There’s talk about punishing Schumer for this but I think that’s a dumb idea and would be very unfair. While I disagree with Schumer, and I believe no deal is a pathway to Iran having nukes, punishing him is bad politics and would send a very negative message.

It took me about eight hours to draw this cartoon. Well, not to draw it but it took me that long to finish it. I started the cartoon then ordered some Kung Pao Chicken, went into a food coma, woke up, jammed to some Pete Yorn, walked the Beagle, Watched the end of Across The Universe, corresponded to some social media comments, and then I started drawing again. It’s a hard job. I do have Kung Pao leftovers for tomorrow.

I am really not fond of using movies for an analogy in a cartoon, unless it involves sharks in twisters.

Why do I not like using movies in cartoons? I’m glad you asked. Because it’s lazy. It’s not unique or original.

I suspect it works like this for other cartoonist because it’s how it used to work for me: You need an idea but you don’t have one so you think “hey, there’s probably a new movie out there everyone’s talking about and I can just draw that and throw in some labels and maybe a caricature.” Work day is over and I’m brilliant. No I’m not.

Not only is it lazy, it’s just too obvious when the movie is popular. There’s been a dozen to a hundred political cartoons with Minions. I refuse to draw Minions, just because everyone else is doing it. Lazy. Plus, I felt the movie kinda sucked in comparison to Despicable Me (Despicable Me 2 was just OK). I’ve also seen a few with the new Mission Impossible. I don’t know which number Mission Impossible is this new one. I don’t like Tom Cruise, though the fairly recent one where he’s fighting aliens at Normandy and reliving the same day over and over was really bad ass. I digress.

Now if you do a cartoon with a movie that’s not popular you may think “yeah, I’m brilliant” except nobody else wants to do that because most people don’t want to suck. Readers may not remember the movie you’re referring to if it’s not current, so the movie should be a classic or at least well known in pop culture like Gone With The Wind, Rebel Without A Cause, Jaws, Star Wars, Wizard Of Oz, Blues Brothers, you get where I’m going here.

Last week some dork did a cartoon with the movie Shallow Hal. Do you remember Shallow Hal? It’s a Farrelly Brothers movie with Jack Black and it’s not a good Farrelly Brothers movie with Jack Black. It sucked. It makes things that suck seem to suck less because it sucks so much. It came out in the early 2000s and I doubt it would have been a good idea then. Did I mention it sucked? Basically, Hal is shallow. He’s hypnotized to only see the inner beauty in people, thus he starts dating Gwyneth Paltrow who is a total beautiful soul, generous with a huge heart, and she’s morbidly obese with cankles and acne. The movie teaches us the lesson to judge a person by their inner beauty and it uses a lot of fat jokes to sell that message. In the movie poster you see Gwyneth and her beauty but her shadow is huge. In the cartoon the shadow is a mushroom cloud but the physical person is an evil hideous-looking Iranian Mullah. Did the cartoonist even see the movie?

I did see a cartoon earlier this week that used the movie Trainwreck. Honestly, I can’t remember if it was good or bad, who drew it or what issue it covered. I decided not to go looking for it when I got this idea. I’ll do that later though to compare.

In my defense to this cartoon: Trainwreck stars Amy Schumer. She’s a cousin of some sort to Senator Schumer. They even had an anti-gun press conference together last week. That may go over readers’ heads, but screw it. I kinda like it, despite it breaking all my rules.

I really don’t like rules despite having a hundred of them for cartooning. In this case, the man I’m sticking it to is myself.

By the way, the movie Trainwreck is pretty funny. Lebron James steals the movie. Spoiler alert so stop reading here: You see a lot of John Cena, the wrestler. I mean a LOT of John Cena. You see more John Cena than anyone would ever want to see of John Cena. Over seeing that much John Cena, I’d rather watch Shallow Hal.

Update: A friend told me it looked like Schumer was holding a turkey leg to his mouth. It’s supposed to be a bottle inside a bag. His comment bothered me enough to redraw the bag. At least now it doesn’t look like a turkey leg.

Here’s the rough.

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