Bill O’Reilly

Carving Up Fox News

cjones10252017

Conservatives and Republicans had a field day going after Harvey Weinstein after it was revealed he spent decades using his power in Hollywood to sexually harass young, wannabe starlets.

You would think the people who were silent over the sexual harassment allegations against their idols Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly, and Donald Trump would be smart enough to continue to keep their traps shut. They should have had as much to say about Weinstein as they did about former Republican Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert. In case you need a reminder, they had nothing to say about Hastert and his pedophilia.

I saw a post by a conservative colleague of mine defending Trump, as if everything against him was only allegations. This same guy frequently refers to Bill Clinton as a rapist.

I’ve seen about two dozen cartoons on Weinstein from people who never touched the stories on conservatives, while liberal cartoonists haven’t held back on Weinstein. Donald Trump Jr. tweeted about Weinstein, momentarily forgetting he’s the son of a man who brags about assaulting women, barging in on teenage girls while they’re undressing, and openly cheated on Jr’s mother. Donald Trump himself went after Weinstein, because he’s a shameless hypocrite, and it was easier to discuss than American troops being killed in Niger.

People like Ted Cruz, who voted and supported Donald Trump for president went after Weinstein as if they actually have an issue or care at all about sexual harassment.

When it comes to hypocrisy, nobody beats the sorry excuses for journalists at Fox News, a bastion of hypocrisy.

There was much outrage all over the media, not just over Weinstein’s decades of sexually harassing women, but also over the fact that his company, and an entire industry, allowed him to get away with it. There were clauses in Weinstein’s contract, not that he’d be fired for harassment, but that there would be penalties to be paid.

Fox News didn’t just report on this, a few of their talking fucks had to express their own personal outrage.

I’m not one for giving parenting advice, but to future parents out there I would advise you never name your kid “Tucker.” That kid will grow up to become a bow tie-wearing asshole who says shit like, ““many powerful people knew what Harvey Weinstein was doing, and not only ignored his crimes, but actively took his side against his many victims.” Shit like that is why Tuckers are constantly getting beat up and receiving swirlies.

Let’s play with Tucker’s sentence. ““many powerful people knew what Bill O’Reilly and Roger Ailes were doing, and not only ignored their crimes, but actively took their side against their many victims.” Why didn’t you say that, Tucker? Do you honestly believe sexual harassment is a partisan issue that is only committed by Democrats and supported by their benefactors? Or, are you just a d-bag, partisan, hypocritical, shameless, idiot?

As it was revealed over the weekend, after Bill O’Reilly settled a sexual harassment lawsuit for $32 million, his employer, FOX FUCKING NEWS, where Tucker Carlson works, rewarded him with a new contract….and the company knew about the settlement. And, they allow fuckers like Tucker to go on the air and bemoan the scandal of movie studios, Hollywood in general, and Democrats of ignoring and taking Weinstein’s side.

But, there’s more. Tucker is not the only hypocritical sorry son of a bitch working at Fox News. Sean Hannity went after Weinstein also and said, “Liberals love to be so sanctimonious, holier than thou, but they’re really hypocrites.” Yes, Hannity. Liberals are the hypocrites here. I’m shocked he could make that statement with a mouthful of Trump’s meatloaf.

Hypocrisy is what Fox News has done. They’ve renewed contracts of known sexual harassers and then allowed these two scumbags to go on the air and bitch about companies who looked the other way for that kind of crap.

Maybe, the jerks at Fox News don’t understand how hypocrisy works. Or maybe, they don’t believe it applies to them.

Or just maybe, they’re afraid if they speak the truth that the old-craggly-ass-stupid-fucker demographic will change the channel.

I want to thank everyone who has donated in the past. Your support helps me continue creating cartoons and columns with a little less stress in my life. Between competing syndicates with much larger resources, timid editors, and Trump supporters who attempt to intimidate the editors who do publish anything that criticizes their idol, it’s a challenge to make a career out of this. So your support (if you can) is appreciated. Want to help me continue to create cartoons and keep doing what I’m doing (pissing off conservatives)? Look to the right of this page and make a donation through PayPal. Every $40 donation will receive a signed print. All donations will receive my eternal gratitude.

Bye Bye, O’Reilly

cjones04242017

The political world got a bit of a jolt yesterday when Fox News kicked their longtime ratings giant and right-wing pundit Bill O’Reilly to the curb yesterday over repeated charges of sexual harassment. I know. It’s tearing you apart.

There are many takeaways to this with the first for conservatives being, “but what about Bill Clinton?” Anyone who throws out the Clinton comparison over stuff that happened two decades ago proves they’re not concerned about ending sexual harassment in the workplace. They only care about political scores. The knuckleheads who bring up this point probably all voted for Donald Trump, the vagina grabber.

The main take on this is that Fox News did the right thing but not for the right reasons. They didn’t ditch O’Reilly because his behavior was too shameful for them or they were disgusted with him. They never had an issue with him destroying careers of those who wouldn’t give him what he wanted. They got rid of him because he became a liability. Advertisers were bailing from his show in massive droves. Fox News prioritized monetary over morality. Ironically, morality was a favorite subject of the hypocritical O’Reilly.

Fox News supported O’Reilly’s behavior. They paid out around $13 million to shut his victims up. They let big name talent like Gretchen Carlson and Megyn Kelly get away after they accused harassment from the former chief of the network, Roger Ailes. Carlson was a loss they can deal with. Kelly’s departure hurts. Now their biggest star is Tucker Carlson.

Fox News hired a law firm to conduct an internal investigation. Reportedly what they found were recordings of phone calls where it sounds like O’Reilly is masturbating. Here’s a tip: If you engage in phone sex make sure the other party is with the program. Some people don’t like surprises, especially ones like craggly-assed old men whacking it over the phone.

Fox News has been under heavy pressure for three weeks since The New York Times published a report of the network’s payout. This week a new accuser, an African-American woman, claimed that O’Reilly called her “hot chocolate.” You would think that after decades of harassing women that he’d get better at it. Perhaps he offered to be her marshmallow.

O’Reilly’s departure does not mean the country or corporate America is moving forward in regards to sexual harassment in the workplace. It just shows that it’ll pay for it to a certain point. You can’t argue progress is being made when corporations will cover up for a big money maker and the rest of the nation voted for a man who bragged about assaulting women and who is on record dishing out sexism in the form of slurs and insults.

I saw several posts yesterday on social media from conservatives swearing they’ll boycott Fox News over this. One was from a conservative colleague of mine. These people exhibit that they don’t care about the treatment of women, especially if their infallible hero is exposed (hopefully not literally). I wouldn’t worry about their boycott as they’re not the faithful type. Several of these same people swore they’d boycott Breitbart over their treatment of a female reporter who claimed Trump’s campaign manager had grabbed her. But within days they were sharing links once again from their favorite racist fake news website.

O’Reilly left the air to take a vacation and he challenged his viewers to guess where he was going. Many on the left guessed correctly that he was going to the curb of 1211 Avenue.

Don’t cry in your beer too much over O’Reilly. Like Ailes, who received a $40 million buyout, I’m sure Bill will walk away with a handsome check. O’Reilly went out defiant with a statement that the accusations are unfounded. He got to meet the Pope during his vacation (I hope he had some hand sanitizer available) and his biggest defender is Donald Trump. I’m also sure we’ll see him again on either One America News or The Blaze network. I wouldn’t be surprised if doesn’t start working for Vladimir Putin on RT. Go for it, Bill!

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Lecherous Lizards

cjones04142017

I don’t know which would be worse. A voicemail from now-former Alabama governor Robert Bentley describing how much he loves approaching you from behind and grabbing your boobies, or……a masturbating Bill O’Reilly, which John Oliver imagines sounds like a dog’s jowls flapping when it sticks its head out of the window of a moving car. I’ll let you decide.

Bentley is leaving his office and stated that he’s looking for new opportunities to serve the public. I really think he shouldn’t be attempting to service anyone. And what is it with these criminals? He gets busted using state resources to cover up an affair. He’s threatened people. And when he’s forced out of his office he makes it sound like it was for creating new opportunities when the truth is the new opportunity he’s avoiding is jail.

Here’s a good rule when you’re voting: Don’t vote for the guy who looks like Mr. Burns. Fact: Democrats never look like Mr. Burns.

I’m drawing another cartoon tonight so this blog has to be shorter than usual. I know you’re disappointed. I’m sure you were looking forward to me writing many more paragraphs regarding old, craggly-assed Republicans and their sex lives.

Smells Like O’Reilly

cjones04062017

Now that Roger Ailes is out of the Fox News building, the chief pervo on staff has gotta be cable news ratings king Bill O’Reilly. Many people are saying (see what I did there?) when he’s not making covert racist comments about women he’s lusting after them.

An investigation by The New York Times reveals that a total of five women who have received payouts from either Mr. O’Reilly or 21st Century Fox (Fox News’ parent company) in exchange for agreeing to not pursue litigation or speak about their accusations against him.

The payouts, which come out to around $13 million, go back as far as 2004 and as recently as last summer. The company says it does not tolerate behavior that “disrespects women or contributes to an uncomfortable work environment.” According to documents and interviews, the complaints ranged from verbal abuse, lewd comments, unwanted advances and phone calls in which it sounded as if Mr. O’Reilly was masturbating.

That would be a very uncomfortable work environment and I think I can speak for us all when I say “EWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwww!!!!” That phone call thing is just one disturbing image. Think about puppies, penguins, and polar bears.

Puppies, penguins, and polar bears. Puppies, penguins, and polar bears. Puppies, penguins, and polar bears. It’s not working!!!!

Do you think O’Reilly will ask for a framed copy of this cartoon and mail me a signed copy of one of his books? His next book should be a guide on how to grope women in the workplace and make your boss pay off the lawsuits.

Cartoon drawn. Blog done. Now I have to take a shower. I was planning to go out for breakfast but now O’Reilly has ruined even that for me.

“EWWWWWWWWWWWWWwwww!!!!”

Creative Note: There’s another version of this cartoon. No, it’s not dirtier. It’s tamer. Right as I finished drawing it I got the idea for the second panel and liked it a lot better. I might post the first version tomorrow or whenever. I don’t want to throw it out on the internet right now for it to be confused with the “official” version.

Update: I had a few requests to post the “alternative” version. I liked it and was going to go with it until I thought of the “hair sniffing” angle in the second panel. I didn’t think of that until the first version was completely drawn and ready to be sent to my clients. I kinda hated to destroy the second panel as I liked my O’Reilly caricature. There was no cutting and pasting here despite my creating this on a digital platform, which would make cutting and pasting easier. I erased the entire second panel and drew a new one. As you can see here, I did save a copy of the first version.

cjones04062017

Blazing Paranoia

Earlier this week a fan on social media shared one of my cartoons and said it was “Monty Pythonesque.” That’s high praise. Today I decided to steal from Mel Brooks’ movie Blazing Saddles. A true classic.

Obama wants to reform the judicial system. He’s not the only one. A lot of Republicans want to also, though they might want to go about it differently.

The president has ordered the release of 6,000 non-violent prisoners convicted of drug charges. Releasing 6,000 will not make much of a dent in our prison population. And despite the fears of a lot of conservatives like Bill O’Reilly, it’s not a threat to society.

The United States has the largest prison population in the world. Many of those are non-violent drug users. This is insane. Rehabilitation for many of these prisoners would be a lot more cost effective, and better suited for prisoners and society, than sitting in a cell.

We do need to reform our judicial system. There are three parts I believe in.

We need to legalize marijuana. It’s no more of a threat than alcohol and it’s not a gateway drug or something that kills people or ruin lives.

We need to end mandatory sentencing. Judging should be left to judges, not legislators.

We need to end private prisons. No one should be making a profit in punishing people. What’s next? For profit executions?

Back to this prisoner release: Some of them will end up back in prison. You can’t have a group of 6,000 of group without someone getting in trouble. It’s going to happen and then look for the likes of Bill O’Reilly to paint it as a Willie Horton situation.

O’Reilly played the race card. He says there’s a racial component for Obama to release these prisoners. On a recent show of his he said this is driven by race with Barack Obama. I know it is. I know it’s race: The cops are huntin’ down inner-city black dealers. They don’t care about the white collar dealers. That’s what’s motivating this.

This is why everyone who watches Fox News is angry. They need to stop scaring old white people like that.

Here’s a couple of roughs I played around with before I settled on my final idea.

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claytoonz

Nationally Syndicated Editorial Cartoonist