Bennie Thompson

Freaks Come Out In 2023


Not only will Republicans hold up President Biden’s agenda if they retake the House, but they’ll work to defund Social Security and Medicare, hold the government hostage by shutting down the government during the next debt-ceiling deadline, and work to give Donald Trump more tax cuts. Additionally, they’re going to conduct a bunch of bullshit investigations that they’re going to have to make a lot of shit up for. The entire GOP agenda is about inflicting revenge on the Democrats for trying to protect the nation from a corrupt “president” and his white nationalist terrorist goons.

So what kind of shit will Republicans investigate?

They’re going to investigate Hunter Biden and his laptop. If the GOP retakes the House, James Comer will likely be the chair of the House Oversight and Reform Committee and he’s promising to investigate the Bidens’ overseas business activities. Comer wants to get a hold of financial records from banks and the Treasury Department to prove that the president is compromised by his son’s business dealings, even though there is zero proof of any corruption from President Biden.

Comer said, “I think that’ll go a long way towards helping us be able to uncover some questions that the American people have about the ethics, and whether or not the Biden administration is truly compromised by Hunter’s shady business dealings.” What is corrupt is helping Donald Trump hide his business records and taxes all while he was bilking the U.S. government during his “presidency” while still making money from foreign governments, but I’m sure none of that compromised him. There’s also no interest from Republicans to find out why Saudi Arabia felt the need to give Jared Kushner $2 billion as soon as he left the White House.

Jim Jordan will likely chair the House Judiciary Committee and he plans to go after the Justice Department and FBI for raiding Mar-a-Lago. Jordan said, “The No. 1 thing is this weaponization of the DOJ against the American people.” Yeah, Donald Trump, a billionaire who shits in gold toilets, is NOT the American people. But how dare the FBI go after a billionaire for stealing classified documents. Maybe Jordan can conduct an investigation into why Trump wanted these documents in the basement of his country club, and why he lied about them for over a year. Jim Jordan also chaired some of the many Benghazi investigations which implicated nobody.

Jordan claims his office has received information from more than a dozen whistleblowers who came forward with allegations of FBI bias against conservatives, including the agency retaliating against employees with conservative views. Don’t hold your breath. You can expect this investigation to go after Attorney General Merrick Garland.

Jim Jordan shouldn’t be investigating anything when he’s the one who should be investigated over a myriad of issues. This guy can’t even come clean about how many times and when he talked to Trump on January 6.

Democrats created a select Oversight subcommittee investigating the coronavirus, and Republicans plan to keep the committee active…and use it to go after Dr. Anthony Fauci while accusing him of creating the virus. Seriously.

Republicans plan to use the House Foreign Affairs Committee to investigate the withdrawal of U.S. troops from Afghanistan but probably won’t talk a lot about the fact it was Donald Trump who set the date on which he negotiated with the Taliban.

There are plans to impeach Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas for the border situation. Steve Scalise, who’ll be second in charge of the House if Republicans take over said Mayorkas will be given a “reserved parking spot” because “he will be testifying so much about this.”

Last Wednesday on Steve Bannon’s podcast, Marjorie Taylor Greene (who currently doesn’t sit on any committees because she expressed a desire to murder Nancy Pelosi) said Republicans will investigate companies that halted donations to the GOP after January 6, 2021, white nationalist terrorist attack on the U.S. Capitol building. She said, “That’s not going to be forgotten by a whole bunch of my Republican colleagues.” This is fascist. Maybe if those corporations start giving money to Republicans again, then they won’t be investigated. MTG exhibits why it was such a good idea to remove her from her committee assignments. But I really do hope MTG’s future committee assignments don’t distract from her trolling and stalking people like Alexandra Ocasio Cortez and school shooting survivors.

Matt Gaetz, also talking to Steve Bannon (goons keep other goons on speed dial), said their number one priority should be to “engage in impeachment inquiries to get the documents and the testimony and the information we need.” Gaetz said “voters will feel betrayed” if they don’t go after President Biden in revenge for the two impeachments of Donald Trump. Gaetz told Bannon that impeaching Biden should take precedence over “policy and bill making” and expressed frustration with Republicans who might actually want to work with Democrats on legislation.

Gaetz said, “We are in a battle and we have to open up every vector of attack on a corrupt administration that is punishing the American people out of these virtue signals to wokeism.” What was missing was context, like what crimes and misdemeanors did President Biden commit to justify impeachment.

Just imagine the millions of taxpayer dollars Republicans are going to waste on these fake investigations.

The only possible good thing to come out of two years of Republicans controlling the House and Senate again is that it’ll remind American voters with short memories why they should never vote for Republicans.

Creative note: I wrote this cartoon two weeks ago and withheld it from Saturday’s batch of roughs.

Music note: I listened to The Black Keys and The Kinks.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw:

Advertisement

Nothing But The No-Truth


CjonesRGB11262021

You can’t expect a Trump cultist to straight up tell the truth, but you can get the truth out of them if you understand Trump talk. It’s pretty simple actually. If a Trumper says someone did something, that means they did it. If they say there’s election fraud, it’s their election fraud. “Election integrity” means making it harder for minorities to vote. If they say they have a “black friend,” that means they’re racist. When they say they’re “constitutionalists,” that means “let’s destroy the Constitution.” When one of them says he’s the “best negotiator” ever, it means he’d trade all of our nuclear secrets to Vladimir Putin for a Happy Meal. “Grab them by the pussy” means grab them by the pussy.

So, what does the January 6 Committee hope to gain from sending subpoenas a bunch of gaslighting liars? The first thing they might get is having all these jackholes sent to prison. Steve Bannon, who was not a member of the Trump administration at the time of the white nationalist insurrection, or a lawyer, claimed executive privilege. He’s not even an executive. All he can claim is white privilege (dammit. Another cartoonist is going to read this blog and steal that). Now, he’s facing some serious jail time.

Mark Meadows was Trump’s chief-of-staff at the time and he has a better argument than Bannon does for executive privilege…and even then, his argument sucks. Here’s the thing, kids (and it’s going to come as a shock to some of you), Donald Trump is NOT president.

No, Donald Trump is not president because he lost the election to the man who is now president, Joe Biden. President Joe Biden beat Donald Trump by over seven million votes. He beat Trump’s ass like he owned it though not literally. Nobody wants to own that ass. But anyway, if you’re NOT president, you can’t cite executive privilege. Even then you can’t claim executive privilege for anything you want. It’s not a rich baby’s candy store.

But it’s the current president, Joe Biden because he spanked that ass, who can claim executive privilege. And in this case, he said, “Nope.” But, Trumpers don’t believe him because they don’t believe in the Constitution. We only have one president at a time, and it’s not Trump…because he lost a free and fair election to Joe Biden. Again, he spanked that orange ass.

So, Mark Meadows will not get away without testifying. Meadows was a big part of the Big Lie. He even tried to get the Justice Department to investigate voting machines being tampered with by Italian Satellites. I think the Justice Department officials who read Meadow’s memo should be forced to testify too…so they can tell us how hard they laughed.

Kayleigh McEnany has been a Trump goon since she bailed from being a Cruz goon. On her first day as White House spokesgoon, she lied by saying she’d never lie. McEnany now works for Fox News and has a new book out. I’m sure she’ll use both platforms for only telling the truth. McEnany was still serving as Trump’s spokesgoon at the time of the insurrection while also working as a campaign adviser which is illegal. You can’t work for a campaign and the government at the same time. But then again, using government property for a political convention is supposed to be illegal too.

McEnany spread lies about election fraud from the podium in the White House press room. She was present while Trump was giddily watching the white nationalist attack on the Capital building.

Trump Campaign goon Jason Miller was subpoenaed. He was a player in spreading election fraud lies and trying to convince legislators to overturn the election in their states. Miller was a contributor to CNN but left in 2018 after being accused of drugging his mistress.

Stephen Miller was director of Trump’s racism department and another spreader of election fraud lies. He may have been subpoenaed just to see if he appears with spray-on hair.

Alex Jones and Roger Stone were also recipients of the January 6 Committee’s subpoenas. Both of these guys are notable liars. Stone is a self-described “dirty trickster” who has a Richard Nixon tattoo on his back. Alex Jones is a right-wing liar and conspiracy theorist who uses his website, InfoWars, and his podcasts to spread them. Last week, a Connecticut court ruled he was liable for spreading defamation about the Sandy Hook school shooting. These guys are the crap that crap craps. You will have to learn how to read right-wing tea leaves to get anything out of them. Both men were a huge part of planning and promoting the insurrection.

If all these goons testify, it will be impossible for each of them NOT to perjure themselves. I’m looking forward to it by stocking up on popcorn.

These goons shouldn’t just go to prison if they defy these subpoenas. No, they should also be charged for their parts in an insurrection against the U.S. government.

And when all this crap goes to prison, I hope they take an orange turd with them.

Creative note: I actually got this idea after I went to bed. Then I laid awake for over an hour wondering how I was going to draw Stephen Miller laughing. This morning, I decided not to. Another thing, I labeled Miller with his full name because I was planning to include another liar named “Miller,” Jason Miller. Then I forgot.
And another thing, this might be the first time I’ve drawn Representative Bennie Thompson since I lived in Mississippi back in the 1990s.

Signed prints: The signed prints are just $40.00 each. Every cartoon on this site is available. You can pay through PayPal. If you don’t like PayPal, you can snail mail it to Clay Jones, P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402. I can mail the prints directly to you or if you’re purchasing as a gift, directly to the person you’re gifting.

Notes on my book, Tales From The Trumpster Fire: There are 19 copies of my book in stock, which go for $45.00 each, signed. Also, I have copies of my first book from 1997, Knee-Deep in Mississippi available for $20.00.

Tip Jar: if you want to support the cartoonist, please send a donation through PayPal to clayjonz@gmail.com. You can also snail it to P.O. Box 3721, Fredericksburg, VA 22402.

Watch me draw: