Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

No Soap For you


cjones06262019

The accusation that detention centers holding migrant children are concentration camps doesn’t necessarily mean they’re being compared to Nazi death camps. But, there are definitely some soap Nazis among Customs and Border Protection.

In fact, this week, the Trump administration went to court to argue that migrant children detained at the U.S.-Mexico border do not require basic hygiene products like soap and toothbrushes in order to be held in “safe and sanitary” conditions. Hell, they even argued that forcing minors to sleep on cold concrete floors in crowded cells, CELLS, with low temperatures also fulfilled the “safe and sanitary” requirement.

News broke this week that there are not enough diapers for the babies currently held by the Trump administration (which would make sense if the big orange baby requires them all). Also, children are being forced to care for toddlers. There are toddlers sitting around in urine-soaked onesies. There is a lack of toothbrushes, toothpaste, and soap. Showers and baths are extremely rare for the children detained by Donald Trump.

In addition to all that, the government is doing all it can to prevent the public from discovering what it’s like inside these detention centers. The press and even elected representatives have been barred from entering many of the facilities.

But, we’re not supposed to call them “concentration camps.” Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the GOP’s current favorite punching bag because she’s liberal, young, smarter than them, female, brown and from New York City, is catching a lot of heat for describing the detention centers as “concentration camps.” She’s not backing down. She shouldn’t.

Not all concentration camps were death camps. During World War II, the term “Internment” was used for the camps holding American citizens of Japanese descent, but they were concentration camps.

Many of Trump’s defenders argue that these detention centers don’t meet the requirement for the tag of “concentration.” They argue that most concentration camps are under dictatorships, meanwhile, Trump threatened to jail a reporter yesterday for taking a picture.

The American Heritage Dictionary defines “concentration camp” as “a camp where persons are confined, usually without hearings and typically under harsh conditions, often as a result of their membership in a group the government has identified as dangerous or undesirable.”

If that description doesn’t fit these centers, then I don’t know what does.

The fact is, they are concentration camps. The problem is, most Americans don’t want to live in a country that allows them, so they will never admit they exist. Problem. The United States of America under Donald Trump has concentration camps and they’re full of babies.

For what it’s worth, the Nazis never told their citizens about their concentration camps either. They just handed them the soap.

Update: The rough. This was the original idea, which I came up with a few days ago. It was included with all the other roughs for this week’s CNN cartoon. After the story came out about the conditions at the centers, I gave up on it and went with the above idea. I like the new one much better.

CNNrough150

Be Complicit

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Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
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Dinosaur Snowball


cjones03312019

Conservatives are not good with humor, especially when they try to use it to make a point. Usually, the only point they’ve made is that they’re morons.

In 2015, Republican Senator from Oklahoma, James Inhofe threw a snowball on the Senate floor to prove Climate Change doesn’t exist. What’s even more messed up is that at the time, he was chairman of the Senate Environment and Public Works Committee. Seriously.

Utah’s Senator Mike Lee said, “The solution to climate change is not this unserious resolution…the solution to so many of our problems at all times and in all places is to fall in love, get married, and have some kids.” Was that a joke? I can’t tell.

Mike Lee is a Mormon from Utah and the answer to Climate Change is the Osmond solution. Let’s make more of them.

On Tuesday, Lee went on the Senate floor to take down the Green New Deal and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, one of the bill’s sponsors. He didn’t bring a snowball with him. No. Instead, he brought…wait for it…a post of Ronald Reagan riding a dinosaur. Yeah, I don’t get it either. There were other props, like pictures of Aquaman.

Basically, he used three things that aren’t real. Dinosaurs, Aquaman, and Ronald Reagan.

Creative note: This is your Tuesday Bonus Cartoon. No, it’s not set in stone that you’ll get two cartoons every Tuesday. Maybe I’m still kinda revved up after taking Sundays off…or more shit happens on Tuesday. A lot of shit happened this Tuesday.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

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St. Patrick’s Green New Deal


CNN03172019

Here’s this week’s cartoon for CNN’s weekly opinion newsletter, Provoke/Persuade.

We originally started out planning to do a cartoon on the college cheating scandal. The producer and I had a long talk about it Thursday night and we both thought it’d still be the largest issue of the week by Sunday. After seeing the rough for this cartoon, she changed her mind and thought the newsletter should have something on St. Patrick’s Day.

On Friday morning, we were still going with the St. Paddy’s toon but she said if I came up with anything on New Zealand, which happened early Friday morning our time, that I should bounce it off her. Unfortunately, everything I came up with on New Zealand was really mean. We stuck with the St. Paddy’s cartoon. She did say that it’d be hard to do something appropriate on New Zealand.

The cartoon I drew on New Zealand was not one of the ones I submitted to CNN. I didn’t get that idea until late Friday afternoon. I doubt they would have wanted it either.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
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Grounded By Socialism


cjones03172019

A Boeing 737 Max 8 crashed in Ethiopia Sunday, killing eight Americans. On Tuesday, Trump tweeted, not to offer condolences to the victims and families, but to complain that “Airplanes are becoming far too complex to fly.”

Trump argued that “old and simpler is far better” than new technology being used in cockpits. He finished up by saying, “I don’t know about you, but I don’t want Albert Einstein to be my pilot. I want great flying professionals that are allowed to easily and quickly take control of a plane!”

I too wouldn’t want Einstein piloting a plane I’m in, because he’s dead. I really don’t want anyone unqualified and without experience at the helm of anything complex and dangerous where one mistake could kill thousands of people…like the presidency. Imagine having a pilot with hands too tiny, insecure that the former pilot was more popular and qualified, all while jacked up on Adderall.

Just like everything else in the world, we really don’t want Trump’s expertise on air travel. This is the guy who wanted his personal pilot of Trump Force One (yeah, that’s what they call it) to head the FAA. Currently, that position remains unfilled because, despite two years on the job, Trump hasn’t nominated anyone.

Sunday’s crash in Ethiopia was the second in five months of a Boeing 737 Max 8, the other being in Indonesia. It’s a newer aircraft and it’s very unusual for these things to go down. Tracking data and evidence from Sunday’s crash revealed parallels to the disaster five months ago in Indonesia. Pilots have been registering complaints about these planes for months.

While the rest of the world was grounding the 737, Trump and the FAA resisted. Trump was lobbied by the CEO of Boeing, Dennis Boeing (I’m assuming that’s his last name), who contributed $1 million to Trump’s inauguration (which is also under investigation because a lot of that money came from foreign sources, like Russians and disappeared).

Reportedly, Trump was resisting bipartisan calls to ground the planes because he was worried about Boeing’s stocks. He reversed course and shocked the FAA, as they thought they would make the announcement.

Boeing is an American company and the rest of the world is having a hard time trusting America right now. Nobody knows why. Ethiopia rejected requests from the U.S. for the black box from the wreckage and instead sent it to Europe to be examined.

Conservatives freaked out over the Green New Deal, claiming it would ban air travel. The Green New deal calls for building high-speed rail so air travel isn’t as necessary. But if you don’t want the big scary government sticking its nose in your business over using combustible engines, then would you want them telling you what type of Boeings you can fly in? The Green New Deal doesn’t call for taking any planes out of the sky, but Trump just did. Are we Venezuela now?

Why should we allow the government to take away our cheeseburgers while demanding how we get from point A to point B? Isn’t liberty being able to take a farting cow onto an airplane piloted by inflatable Otto from Airplane!

That is unless Otto gets that FAA job.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

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A Toon For The Deranged


cjones03092019

Sycophants of Donald Trump accuse his critics of suffering from TDS, Trump Derangement Syndrome. They claim liberals, Democrats, and Never Trumpers in the Republican party react irrationally to everything Trump says and does, paying little attention to the details, his actions, and his successes. They claim people like me hate Trump just because he’s Donald Trump. It’s as if Trump hasn’t given anyone a good reason to criticize him.

The truth is, I don’t hate Donald Trump. I do dislike the man. Before he was president, he was a racist conman with little regard for anyone except himself. He’s the kind of guy who steals from charities, refuses to pay people who work for him, and starts a campaign to delegitimize a black president because of his race. He’s the kind of guy who boasts about what a great businessman he is while bankrupting a casino. He’s the kind of guy who hangs fake Time Magazine covers of himself in his golf clubs and calls members of the press while impersonating a fictional employee bragging about Donald Trump’s dating life. He’s the kind of guy who will cheat on his wife who is at home with a newborn, and then get on a bus and brag about it to another celebrity. He’s the kind of guy who seduces porn stars by showing them pictures of himself on magazine covers and comparing them to his daughter. He’s the kind of guy who says he’d like to date his daughter. Yeah, I don’t like that guy.

Who I do hate is President Donald J. Trump. I don’t suffer from TDS because I’m not irrational about it. My criticism of him has a bit more depth to it than “orange man bad.”

I hate a president who commits campaign fraud, obstructs justice, solicits help from a foreign adversary, sells his nation out to Vladimir Putin, uses the Justice Department to punish his enemies, violates the emoluments clause, seeks to divide the nation based on his hatred, throws children into cages, vilifies the weak while throwing tax cuts at the mega-rich, and calls nations where brown people come from “shitholes.” I hate a president who is illiterate and can’t stop tweeting about how he’s being victimized. I hate a president who fills government positions with unqualified people, like members of his family. I hate that he gave a security clearance to his dimwit son-in-law. I hate a president who attacks Gold Star families and POWs. I hate a president who doesn’t stop holding campaign rallies. I hate a president who encourages his supporters to commit violent acts. I hate a president who doesn’t understand tariffs, the nuclear triad, NATO, foreign policy, the three branches of government, and the U.S. Constitution. I hate a president who wants to waste billions on a stupid, useless, racist border wall as a vanity project. I hate a president who calls black athletes “sons of bitches.” I really hate a president who smears our allies while cozying up to dictators. I hate a president who gives murderers like Kim Jong Un and Muhammad Bin Salman a pass.

Orange man is bad, but orange president is dangerous.

To me, Trump Derangement Syndrome doesn’t describe his critics. It describes the cult that is his followers who ignore all the things I mentioned. It describes the people who defend Trump, and who also criticized Obama for wearing a tan suit, putting mustard on a burger, and claimed he was born in Kenya, on an apology tour, and was going to take away everyone’s guns. These are the people who attacked his wife for trying to get kids to eat more vegetables.

Now, if you really want to see deranged behavior, go back to last weekend’s Conservative Political Action Conference (which is less about being conservative and more about being TrumpTrumpTrumpTrumpOHMYGODTrumpTrumpTrump). Even before the deranged, incoherent, two-hour-plus rant from Trump, the derangement was off the charts. I’m talking about the entire conference’s obsessions with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

If you watched the conference, then you heard how she wants to ban cows, which means no more hamburgers. They claim she wants to ban planes. They air a video of her dancing during her college years, but they darken the lighting and try to make it ominous, as though the Breakfast Club dance is equivalent to sacrificing babies, which they also accuse her of.

The point at her socialism and compare it to Venezuela, instead of places like Norway and Canada. It’s funny they compare American socialists to strongmen who prop themselves up by building their military, while American socialists always advocate for less spending on the military. But then again, these are the same idiots who claim she wants to ban cows.

Former Trump aid and super creepy guy Sebastian Gorka said she is trying to realize Stalin’s dream of taking away all our hamburgers, which is something I didn’t know Stalin was into. Mark Meadows, the Republican who has a black friend, made the same argument about taking away hamburgers…and so did Ted Cruz…and so did Donald Trump Jr, and about 50 other participants at the conference.

You would think AOC was running for president and not six years from being old enough to qualify for the job. You would think she held a leadership position in her party. You would think she wasn’t just a freshman representative. But, the CPAC crowd is so obsessed with her that they barely have time to chant “lock her up,” or cry about emails, or scream “Benghazi!”

The conference ran for four days. Four days of this hamburger nonsense. Did they actually take apart her Green New Deal on specifics or get into actual details? Nope. Did they go after the MAN who co-sponsored the non-binding legislation? Nope. Do they even know his name? Nope. But for four days, “booga, booga, booga, no more hamburgers.”

Republicans project, like Trump criticizing Obama for not releasing his school records, yet he threatens his schools not to release his. But they don’t notice their hypocrisy. A conservative who accuses you of suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome probably has 148 AOC memes on his Facebook page, the majority of them dealing with cow farts. They’re oblivious.

Trump and his sycophants are the ones who truly are deranged. Unfortunately, they’re often successful in shaping the narrative. We can’t let the deranged set the tone or the agenda going into the next presidential election.

That would be deplorable.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch the video.

Nasty Republican Sock Drawer


cjones02192019

Republicans have an Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez fetish. Who can blame them? But still, while hating everything she stands for, they’re making it clear that it’s more about her than about the positions she’s advocating. Take the Green New Deal as an example.

The Green New Deal is a resolution pushing the United States 100% renewable, zero-emission energy sources by 2035. Republicans hate this because it’s environmental and they can’t understand it. How dare she.

While the resolution focuses on investments in electric cars and high-speed rails, eventually replacing buildings, creating new jobs, improving healthcare, and combating poverty, the most Republicans can get it out of it is that it’ll turn us into socialist Venezuela and ban cows from farting. Seriously.

I have seen about ten cartoons from conservatives about AOC banning cow farts proving they either haven’t read the legislation or that they’re lying about it. But, conservative cartoonists are used to crapping out cartoons.

While it is kinda sorta funny in a low-brow way to joke about cow farts, they actually are a major contributor to methane in the atmosphere. But, nobody’s talking about getting rid of cows or discovering some way of making them stop farting. If you want to change cow farts,  you have to change the humans who are handling the cows. By the way, I’m sure Venezuela has its share of farting cows. Stalin, for all his tyranny couldn’t stop cows from farting. Besides, we all like steaks, cheeseburgers, and ice cream. We’re not getting rid of cows.

But, all the anger over this is directed at AOC. Bad girl! Grrr! Anger! Fuming Facebook memes! While directing all this hostility toward her, very few actually counter her positions. None of these conservatives can take her down. And, when a high-profile conservative attempts to do so on Twitter, they get taken down by her. Don’t mess with a woman who’s smarter than you.

I mentioned how many cartoons I’ve seen on cow farts, but the number on AOC alone is staggering. One cartoonist has drawn her six times over the past two weeks. Other conservatives are going after her with more frequency. A lot of it, most of it is sexism. Hashtag “AOC’ and “GreenNewDeal” on Twitter and see what turns up. Tell me if you see the name Ed Markey.

Why would I bring up Ed Markey, the Senator from Massachusetts? Because Markey is co-sponsor of the Green New Deal with AOC, yet you’re not hearing his name in all the criticism. For some reason, AOC is receiving all the scorn and poor Ed Markey is going ignored. Could it be…sexism? Old white guys just can’t catch a break.

Other things conservatives also leave out in their outrage is that the resolution is nonbinding and they don’t understand “net zero.” Look up “net zero and you may stop freaking out about environmental plans.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell plans to bring the Green New Deal up for a vote. This is a plan to see who supports it so they can use it against them, preferably Democratic Senators currently running for president. Of course, that overlooks the fact that the majority of Americans are for reducing our carbon footprint and they support the Green New Deal, even though they don’t understand it either. McConnell also hopes to increase attacks against AOC because that’s just good Republican strategy…maybe…they think.

The GOP went after her for saying the world will end in 12 years, when she was talking about the United Nation’s putting out a report that we have twelve years to change before it’s too late to change. They hang on her every word and look for gaffes, like when she said “ringworm” instead of “hookworm.” They question her intelligence even though they’re the party of Trump and believed Sarah Palin was ready for the presidency. They’ve gone after her for not being able to afford an apartment in Washington before she was sworn into Congress. They’ve made fun of her wardrobe. They’ve manufactured a viral lie about her credit rating. Tucker Carlson recently called her a “screechy moron.” They even released a video of her dancing while in college, which only made her more appealing.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is everything Republicans fear in one package. An intelligent, Hispanic, liberal woman looking to change the future. While they’re very vocal about her, I don’t want to know what sort of icky thoughts are in their heads.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

Watch the video.

Greetings For The 116th


cjones01082019

Yesterday was a historic day for Congress.

Nancy Pelosi became the first person elected as Speaker after leaving the position since Sam Rayburn in 1955. She remains the only women ever elected to the position.

There were several other historic achievements for women with the 116th Congress.

We saw the swearing-in of the first Native American women elected to Congress, Deb Haaland and Sharice Davids, the first Muslim women elected to Congress, Rashida Tlaib and Ilhan Omar, and the youngest member ever elected, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

Cortez has become the Right’s favorite new symbol of scary women. Google “Alexandria Ocasio Cortez Brietbart” and see what comes up. They’re obsessing about her almost as much as they are about black crime.

Yesterday, Republicans groaned and booed her when she cast her vote for Pelosi. She was the only person they booed for voting. Republicans also released a video of her dancing with friends from her college days. Nothing salacious, evil, or malicious about the dancing, as they were doing a play on The Breakfast Club. But for some reason, this is a scandal for the GOP. If Footloose Kevin Bacon becomes a transexual and runs for Congress, they will totally flip out.

Mike Pence, a man afraid to be alone in a room with a woman who is not his wife, got a little thrill when he not only had to swear women in with a Quran but also the first openly bisexual woman elected to Congress. Kyrsten Sinema chose to be sworn in on a law book instead of the Bible. Pence probably experiences as much discomfort with the Constitution as he does with the Quran and “nasty” women capable of having their own thoughts.

The Women’s March in 2017 continued into the halls of Congress yesterday, and Republicans are petrified. They don’t know how to gerrymander the women vote.

More people are voting for Democrats now than for Republicans. In 2016 and 2018, the majority of the nation voted against Donald Trump. Despite controlling the Senate, more people voted for Democratic candidates. Women aren’t just voting and getting more involved with activism, they’re running for office. Cortez, an educated, socialist, woman who is not white represents everything they fear. The future.

I personally believe we need to keep electing more women, non-whites, and people with different religious beliefs to positions of power. We are a diverse nation. Our government should represent that.

Yesterday presented us with two contrasting images. One was of the most diverse Congress in history being sworn in. The other was Donald Trump surrounded by a bunch of old bald white guys griping about immigrants.

Guess which one represents your future.

Be Complicit

What kind of person would want to be part of something that disparages, slanders, and disrespects Dear Leader and his sycophantic followers? Hopefully, you. 
Making a contribution supports my work and keeps the cartoons, columns, and videos coming. My income is from newspapers that subscribe to my work and small contributors. George Soros hasn’t sent me a million dollar check in weeks. Making a contribution of any amount, or buying a print for $40.00, makes you part of this specific resistance, and a member of Team Claytoonz (we’re still working on the name). You are complicit, an accomplice, and in cahoots (and whatever gangster terms we can think of) with this political satire pointing out that the stupid emperor has no clothes. Contributions can be made through PayPal, checks, and wads of cash exchanged in back alleys.
Whether you can help support, can’t, or just choose not to, please continue to enjoy and keep reading my work. Thank you!!! 

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.