Immigrants

Voice


cjones03062017

During Donald Trump’s State of the Disunion address to Congress last week he unveiled a new plan to unleash tyranny on people who are not the right color. That is, those who are not the white color.

The new program is called VOICE, which is an acronym for Victims Of Immigration Crime Engagement office, and not a singing game show featuring that guy high-pitched dude from Maroon 5. It was really hard to work out an acronym for “I Hate Brown People.” Its purpose is to go after undocumented immigrants who commit crimes. Number 45 said “I have ordered the Department of Homeland Security to create an office to serve American victims. We are providing a voice to those who have been ignored by our media, and silenced by special interests.”

Who he’s giving a voice to are racists and implementing a strategy to further build distrust and fear of immigrants. This despite the fact that immigrants commit crimes at a lower rate than the general public and hard-line immigration policies don’t matter. It’s also a strategy to shame “sanctuary cities,” or anyone with compassion and empathy.

Trump signed another stupid executive order establishing this office. The Department of Homeland Security will be relocating department resources currently going to advocating for undocumented immigrants to punishing them.

During his speech Trump used human props which were three guests whose family members were allegedly killed by criminals living in the US illegally.

Bernie Sanders may have said it best with “The murder of anyone is a tragedy, and our hearts go out to all families who lose a loved one to violence. But let’s be clear about what Donald Trump is doing tonight in inviting family members who saw a loved one murdered by an undocumented immigrant. He is stirring up fear and hatred against immigrants and trying to divide our nation.”

Sanders also mentioned victims of hate crimes by non-immigrants and wondered why Trump didn’t mention them. He could create a special unit to go after white racists who commit violent acts. He can call the special unit Cracker Jacks. We can work out the acronym later.

I know the Nazi and Hitler comparisons are getting old, but so are policies that remind of Nazi policies that criminalized being Jewish. Yeah, they had those. It started with framing Jews as criminals and building mistrust and things just got worse from there.

Fearing the United States government cracking down on immigrants, Mexico has opened legal assistance, or immigration defense, centers at its 50 consulates in the United States. Don’t freak out but yes. Mexico has 50 consulates in our country. That nation has allocated $54 million and is hiring 320 workers to provide these services.

If you are a Mexican immigrant, or you know someone who is, visit Mexico Online for the locations, addresses, phone numbers and emails for the consulates.

Trump isn’t providing a “voice” to help people. But sanctuary cities and Mexico are willing to provide them a real voice.

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A Haunted Hounding


cjones02072017

Commercials have become a huge thing now for Super Bowls. Companies spend millions for airtime and many go over the top for creativity and humor. Others do not. During this year’s Super Bowl a few had small political messages in them. Budweiser aired a commercial that was pro Immigration (as their founder immigrated here) and now wacked-out-of-their-gourds conservatives are boycotting the company.

The company had another commercial which was non-political but kinda creepy. It featured the ghost of Spuds Mackenzie, their advertising icon from the late 1980s and early 1990s. Nobody wants to see a dead dog.

Back to this boycott thing: There’s a special irony and stupidity for any white person to be anti-immigrant. And why are you anti-immigrant and hating on refugees? Is there no compassion in your soul?

People are boycotting Starbucks because they plan to hire 10,000 refugees across 75 countries. Why hate on that? Now a much smaller coffee company called the Black Rifle Coffee Company pledges to hire 10,000 veterans. How is that supposed to hurt people who are in favor of helping refugees? Good for them for wanting to hire veterans. Bad for them making a publicity stunt on something they’ll never do. Meanwhile, Starbucks will hire 10,000 refugees and they’ve already initiated a program to hire veterans too.

The Tiny Penis Coffee Company will not be hiring 10,000 veterans. They don’t have stores. They’re based in Utah and they’re a mail-order company. They’re not going to be able to fit 10,000 veterans into their mail room. Another thing, their coffee beans are imported. What, did you think Utah was prime farm country for coffee beans? They’ll create 10,000 jobs for Colombians before they hire 10,000 veterans.

Trump’s ban on Muslims is failing. A federal judge in Washington State temporarily struck it down. Trump replied on Twitter by calling the judge a “so-called judge” and saying if anything bad happens then the judge should be blamed. Our so-called president needs to read his executive orders better and lay off the Twitter and Cable news.

Now 127 companies are opposing Trump’s travel ban. If you want to boycott businesses that are pro-refugees, and pro-law, then you’re gonna have to do without Adobe, HP, Pandora, Tesla, TripAdvisor, Apple, DocuSign, DropBox, eBay, Facebook, Google, GoPro, Indiegogo, Intel, Kickstarter, Levi, LinkedIn, Microsoft, Mozilla, Netflix, Netgear, Patreon, Paypal, Pinterest, Quora, Reddit, Shutterstock, Spotify, Squarespace, Uber, Yelp, Wikimedia, and finally, Twitter.

If you’re boycotting Budweiser for their pro-immigrant commercial (and not for their watery beer), but using Facebook and Twitter to express your outrage, then you’re a hypocrite. But then again, conservatives are always hypocrites.

If you’re really against immigrants and everything about them, then you need to boycott yourself.

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I Can Haz Jihad?


cjones12152015

Can we restrict people from entering this country if they’re annoying and self indulgent? Yes, we should prevent dangerous people from crossing our borders, but I think we should add selfie queens (that includes you dudes too) to the list. We have enough insecure people who were born here who can’t resist the urge to share their neuroses with the entire world, why invite more? And don’t get me started on cat pictures. Dog pictures are OK. In fact, being a dog lover should move people to the front of the line.

News reveals that the Jihadist chick who was one of the terrorists in the San Bernardino shootings entered the country without having her social media checked out? What? I doubt you can get a decent job without someone from human resources checking out your Facebook and judging your cleavage and nights of drunken hootenannies. If Burger King wants to see your thong, then why shouldn’t DHS also take a peek?

I don’t think we should stop people from coming to our country. That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be vetted, or that the process we’re using now is perfect. Hell, the 19 hijackers responsible for 9/11 entered the country on visas. Everyone needs to be checked out whether they’re students or a fiance for a U.S. born loser who can’t get an American date and orders a bride from the Philippines.

So why didn’t Homeland Security check out Tashfeen Malik’ s Facebook page? Sure, stereotyping is bad but she had been a resident of two nations, Pakistan and Saudi Arabia, where people are trained to hate the United States. Reportedly, she made several posts expressing a desire to join ISIL. Her posts were private and could only be seen by her most trusted Jihadists friends, but DHS should have checked it out anyway. I’m sure the NSA is spying on U.S. citizen’s social media, so DHS could probably hack her Facebook and see whether she had a massive crush on Matthew McConaughey or Jihadi John. We need to know if her sugar daddy is Abu Bakr al Baghdadi.

So yeah, check out social media. See if they hate America or just hate Nickelback. And if anyone from the National Security Agency is checking this out, please don’t put me on the No-Fly List for “I Can Have Jihad?”.

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