Woof Woof, Meow Meow, Spend Spend

Nineteen Senate Republicans joined with Democrats to pass a $1.2 trillion infrastructure bill despite Donald Trump loudly screaming against it.

Typically, Republicans are scared to death of Donald Trump and his cult. This is because Republicans are spineless cowards. But they may not have much to fear this time from the Trump cult over this massive spending bill.

One reason they don’t have to worry so much is that spending on infrastructure is good. How dare you repair bridges, fill potholes, and create jobs in my community. Even Republicans who voted against this will receive infrastructure money in their states. And since they are Republicans, they’ll still take credit for it.

But a better reason Republicans who opposed Trump on this don’t have to fear is because this legislation is nuts-and-bolts stuff. Trump supporters don’t understand gritty details. Half of Republicans in Congress don’t understand gritty details and nuts and bolts of legislation. Do you honestly believe Lauren Boebert is doing math? Do you think Marjorie Taylor Green is shouting through a mail slot about a sewage system in Akron? Matt Gaetz won’t even look at the bill unless you draw a pair of teenage boobies on it.

Trump supporters don’t know this shit. They’re idiots who believe he’s going to be reinstated. They only get fired up over wedge issues and three-syllable chants (“lock her up,” “send them back,” “drain the swamp,” “stop the steal,” and a two syllable one as a bonus, “space force”). They don’t even understand the stuff they do get upset about but those things are much easier to get all sweaty over. They want red meat, not deets.

Republicans are not going to get upset over spending on infrastructure. If you really want them upset over spending, tell them it was for allowing trans to play on female sports teams and use public restrooms. Tell them it was for making Cat in the Hat a crossdresser. Tell them it was to remove Mr. Potato Head’s penis and sticking it in his trunk.

Tell them we’re spending $1.2 trillion to rename the Washington Monument “Black Lives Matter Monument.” Tell them it was for Obama’s birthday party (Pearl Jam and balloons aren’t cheap). Tell them it was to put more broccoli and cauliflower into school lunches. Tell them we spent a trillion bucks on public face masks and mandated sleeveless shirts from the Michelle Obama Collection.

Tell them the $1.2 trillion infrastructure is code for repairing Jewish space lasers. Tell them the money is for straight conversion to make daycare students gay. Tell them it’s for microchips in the coronavirus vaccines to track everybody’s porn consumption. Tell them it’s for creating a chemical to place inside school face masks that’ll turn your children into godless socialists and vegans. Tell them the money is ban cow farts. For some weird reason, the GOP is horny for cow farts. Tell them the $1.2 trillion is to tear down Trump’s racist border wall and build open bridges from El Paso to Caracas. Then, tell them were Caracas is.

Donald Trump was all in favor of infrastructure spending when he was president (sic). But now he’s against it. That would be like him being in opposition to us spending $1.2 trillion to buy Greenland.

Donald Trump doesn’t understand infrastructure. He only understands tax cuts for himself and racist dog whistles. The only reason he’s opposed to this legislation is because it’s a win for President Joe Biden.

Now, this legislation is going to the House where Republicans are even shittier and more cowardice than they are in the Senate.

Cats and dogs didn’t really get married. It was just a one-night stand. Today, they’re back at fighting over other infrastructure spending, like creating more internet for rural America where they’re more likely to believe in shit like Trump winning the election, George Soros-funded caravans, deep-state lizard people, and Jewish space lasers. Come to think of it, maybe we should oppose creating more internet for rural fucknuts.

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