Redskins Is Deadskins

Here’s a prediction: The Washington Redskins will never play another game in the National Football League. I feel more confident about that than I do about there ever being another season for the National Football League.

Dan Snyder, the owner of Washington’s football team, and possibly the worst owner in the league, has resisted even considering changing the name. And let’s not quibble on this fact: The name “Redskins” is racist. If you don’t believe that, then walk up to a Native American and say, “How, Redskin.”

People generally hate change, especially in tradition. It’s not always racist when someone resists changing the name of their favorite football team. People feel like they own a part of their team. I’d hate it if my team, the New Orleans Saints, had to change its name…or the Chicago Cubs. It’s bad enough rooting for a team owned by a Trump supporter, but hey…everyone has the right to cheer for a team while hating the owner. Redskins and Cowboys fans are notorious for hating their teams’ owners. Hell, people still love their teams while hating coaches and players.

Owners and players come and go. Names and tradition typically stay… but not always. Usually, you ditch racist people. So let’s ditch this racist name. It won’t be the first time a major franchise in Washington has changed its name. The NBA’s Washington team did so a couple decades ago fearing “Bullets” was improper, in a city with a lot of gun violence. I always thought the most insensitive name in sports was the Miami Hurricanes. Who in Florida wants to root for a hurricane? So, the basketball team in Washington, fearing “Bullets” was improper chose the name “Wizards” for a team popular with black Americans in a black-majority city. And what the hell do wizards have to do with Washington other than all the racist Republicans in Congress and the White House?

But, the “Redskins” name will change. And I don’t say this out of confidence and faith in Dan Snyder’s social awareness while flags and monuments are changing. I say it out of Dan Snyder’s fear of losing corporate sponsorship. When the money is threatened, that’s when shit changes. Goodbye, Redskins. Hello…well let’s speculate on what we’ll be saying hello to.

One name being considered, and some mockups of the logo have even been designed, is “Washington Redtails.” The “Redtails” honors the Tuskegee Airmen, the first black American pilots in the US armed forces who fought in World War II. The tails of their planes were red which of course is where the nickname comes from. This name is a win-win in that it honors black Americans and the military. Don’t like it? What, are you a racist who doesn’t support our troops? See? That name could work.

Another name being suggested is “Washington Warriors” because the team can keep most of the logo with the feathers and arrows and totally miss the point of why they’re changing the name in the first place.

Another name being discussed is “Washington Monuments” which would probably put a phallic symbol on the helmets….and yeah no.

Another is “Washington Capitols” which is really stupid because we already have the “Washington Capitals.”

Some president’s names have also been suggested like Jefferson, Roosevelt, and Lincoln. Why don’t you just call the team the “Washington Washingtons?” What about the “Washington Fillmores?” How about the “Washington Nixons?” Oooh…I know. “The Washington Obamas.” That name would honor the city, the first black president, and troll Donald Trump and his cult so hard….I LIKE IT!!!

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